Guys, I'm so sorry it has been this long. Midterms have been kicking my butt, my grandma has been to the ER I don't know how many times now, my mental state has crashed, etc. Trust me when I say you will hate group projects when you are in college. Yeah, I know, life story yada yada. Anyway, life throws things at you and you just have to roll with them. I am still extremely sorry that this is being uploaded so late though.

Thank you for all the new reviews. I love reading them! Please keep it up :)

There is only one more chapter after this one, so we are nearing the end. And I promise I will upload that chapter so you guys can have closure to the story.

I hope you enjoy this chapter :)

We got back in Shinra's apartment that evening and he greeted us both with hugs as if we had been gone for ages. When he pulled back he started into a fit though because he saw my arm.

"Can't you go more than a week without getting hurt?"

"This is nothing, just a small scratch. I patch these kinds of cuts up all the time."

"Well you aren't this time. I'm going to check both of your wounds and make sure you didn't screw anything up today."

. . . .

"You opened up a few stitches on your bullet wound. It was bleeding a little bit. You didn't notice?"

"No, it didn't hurt."

Shinra just looked at me and shook his head. "I wish I had your pain tolerance, I really do."

"Was Izaya okay? He said he had over done it a little jumping around earlier." This just made Shinra look at me again.

"He didn't say anything to me about that. He looked fine. What did he do?"

"He jumped off of a railing on the second floor to the ground."

"What?!" Shinra all but screamed.

"He jumped off…." I repeated.

"I heard what you said. You two don't know how to tone it down for a bit, do you?"

"Heh, I guess not."

. . . .

The next morning, Shinra didn't cut either of us any slack. As soon as we trudged into the kitchen for breakfast, he swooped down on us.

"So are you both ready for a day on the town?" He asked, so excited that he seemed to have a slight bounce in his movements.

"Not really." Izaya mumbled from behind me. I chose to stay silent.

"Why?" Shinra seemed genuinely confused.

"Oh, I don't know… maybe because there will be a lot of people and within those people there could be someone who hates me and wants to repeat what happened a few days ago." Some of Izaya's old sarcasm dripped through his words.

"Oh, well we have that covered. After all, Shizuo will be with you and I will have Celty follow you."

"Yeah, somehow that still doesn't make me feel better." Izaya had tucked his hands into his pockets and was staring intently at the floor; making him look like a teenager trying to challenge a parent.

"Well that's just being irrational." Shinra snapped back. I guess he was going the tough love route to force Izaya into recovery.

"So you are still making us do this?" Izaya snapped his head up to look at Shinra, fire in his eyes.

"Yep. Now eat and go have some fun." Shinra waved his hands in a dismissal.

"I'll call Tom and let him know." I said, and excused myself from the bickering. If looks could kill, Izaya would have roasted Shinra alive with his gaze.

….

After we ate breakfast, we were ushered out the door by a very enthusiastic Shinra. Celty followed behind us almost reluctantly. Once we were out the door, Celty typed on her phone for a moment before holding it up for both of us to see.

"Sorry about him. He seemed very convinced this morning that being surrounded by people would be a good way to help. He is a good doctor, but I don't know how he is with treating psychological matters. Just try to take it as easy as you need to. I know it will probably be hard." Izaya nodded and seemed to take a deep breath. Then, we headed to Ikebukuro together as a trio. Celty and I caught up a little bit along the way. I guess we hadn't had much chance to with all the recent craziness. Once we got into the city however, Celty excused herself and held back a bit so she could watch over us.

"So, what do you want to do today?"

"I'm not really sure, to be honest. I was hoping Shinra would forget about this idea." Izaya seemed to huff out all the air in his lungs.

"Yeah, he has been pretty persistent about it. Anything you can think of that might be easier than walking the streets?"

"Maybe watching a movie? That would buy time until lunch. Then we can figure out what to do after that during lunch."

"Sounds good to me. What do you want to watch?"

"The new Star Wars movie is out right now, if you would like that?" I looked over at him just in time to see his eyes light up. I honestly didn't know much about the Star Wars movies, but I felt like watching something he actually cared about would help him relax.

"I haven't seen any of the Star Wars movies."

"You need to start!"

"Okay, haha. Can I watch this one without spoiling the series?"

"Yeah, this one takes place between two movies and doesn't spoil much from what I've heard. I can explain anything you don't understand." He didn't give me any more room to ask questions. Instead, he grabbed my arm and practically dragged me into the theater.

….

"That was amazing! I need to watch the other movies." I was genuinely surprised. I had heard from some people that the movies were boring. But, I guess everyone has different definitions of boring.

"Yeah, you do. I have them if you want to watch them sometime." I turned my attention to Izaya and he was smiling again. I'm glad that he could do such a drastic 360 after dreading this day so much.

"I never would have pegged you for a Star Wars person."

"People surprise you sometimes. That's the first rule of being an informant. But, after you do it for a while people's actions become predictable. Except for you. I could never really predict what you were going to do. You are full of surprises, Shizuo."

"I don't think I'm that surprising, really."

"Whatever you say…. Where do you want to eat?"

"I would say Russian Sushi, but we've been eating that for the past two days."

"Yeah…."

"Actually, I know a good place nearby. You okay with ramen?"

"Yeah."

….

"Their pork cutlet bowl was the best." Izaya looked extremely satisfied and a little more comfortable around people when we were walking out of the restaurant.

"Their pork cutlet bowl is my favorite. I get it every time I go there. And this place isn't that expensive."

We started walking down the street. I'm not even sure where we are going, but I just want Izaya to enjoy the moment for a bit. As we walked farther away though, he seemed to remember that we were surrounded by people and we fell into silence. His eyes went back to darting around and he walked closer to me. I could feel his arm brush mine with every step. For a moment, I had the urge to grab his hand. Purely as reassurance, of course. That would only attract attention to us though. I shouldn't want to hold his hand in the first place anyway. "Where do you want to go?"

"I-I guess we could shop a little. We don't have much time before we need to head back." His stammer caught me off guard and I whipped my head over to look at him. We were in the middle of a huge crosswalk and he was making a point of not looking at me. To be fair, he wasn't looking at anyone really. Other than that, he seemed fine. I continued on until his hands caught my attention. They were shaking slightly. When we reached the end of the crosswalk, I pulled him over to the wall of the first building I saw.

"You okay?" I placed my hands on his shoulders and leaned as close to him as I could. I tried to speak quietly, but loud enough to be heard over the crowd.

"Yeah, just give me a minute. We should go into a store and get away from the people out here." I backed up to check the sign of the building we were against and it was a bank, but two doors down was what looked to be a clothing store.

"There is one right here." I pointed in that direction and took a step away. Izaya pushed off of the wall fast and fell into step right next to me. He seemed even closer to me now than before. His hand kept tickling mine as we walked. I shook my head. Now isn't the time to be thinking about this.

When we reached the store, he hurried past me and through the door. He went to a clothing rack and seemed to be mechanically filing through the clothes. I walked up to him and leaned in close again, trying to make it look like a casual conversation.

"What's wrong?" He looked up at me really fast, his eyes darting around my face, before looking away again. In that instant I saw terror written all over his face.

"I do this sometimes but usually it's when I am near water." His voice was quiet, small. It shocked me, and for a minute I had to look around to make sure it wasn't someone else that had said the words.

"What do you mean by 'this'?" I asked, worry coming into my voice.

"It's a panic attack, Shizuo. It's when you are overcome with fear and it becomes really hard to focus on something or do anything until it's over." His hands gripped a fuzzy shirt as he spoke. He looked to be holding onto it for dear life.

"Oh….is there anything we can do that will help?"

"If I could get away from people, that would be great." I looked around the store. It wasn't as full as it could have been, but is wasn't empty either. Then, I spotted a bathroom in the back.

"Would a bathroom help?" I asked him. He looked up and followed my eyes to the restroom sign in the back. Before I knew what was happening, he bolted in that direction. I followed, but then hesitated, not knowing if he wanted me with him or not. I decided I should ask though, so I followed him through the door. There didn't seem to be anyone in there, as all the stall doors were open. Izaya was at a sink running water over his hands before wiping his face and then repeating the process.

"Um….. Do you want me in here with you or do you want to be left alone?"

"I would appreciate it if you stayed." I just nodded and then stood there watching him wash his face. A moment or two passed before I realized that Izaya had started to cry. My feet carried me to him before my brain caught up. Once it did though, it didn't make a difference. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him to my chest. He was shaking but I wasn't sure if that was because of the crying or his panic attack.

"It's okay. No one is going to hurt you again. I am with you. You are also the best person I know when it comes to fighting with knives and parkour. Celty is outside backing us up. If someone attacks us, they will have hell to pay."

"I don't trust in you or Celty though. I've always sold people out being an informant. You guys have no reason to help me. If I was you, I wouldn't trust me. I mean, I've never given you a reason to trust me. I have literally no one that cares about me. That's why a gang captured me in the first place."

"Izaya, you don't want to be an informant anymore. Sure, you used to be a horrible person, I'm not going to lie. But, everything points to you being a different person now. People can change. And if you stick to the change, I'm sure you will gain friends." We both stood there for a few minutes in silence. Izaya calmed down slowly. "You know, despite everything you have done to Shinra and Celty, they still consider you their friend. I went to their house after my fight with you and they were both angry at me for leaving you like that. They were really worried about you, Izaya."

"Well I don't deserve their worry or their friendship."

"Then prove that you deserve it." At this, Izaya just looked up at me with shocked eyes.

"I will." He nodded as he said it. "Let's get back to Shinra's."

So, this is how I could describe the panic attack based on my personal experiences. Everyone experiences them differently though. I just hope I represented it well enough for those suffering from anxiety or just panic attacks in general.