Everything about the situation seemed so surreal, purely because of how ordinary it was. The people around us sipped at their coffees and chatted to one another as they would any other day and there I sat more terrified than I had ever been in my life.

It had been a month since we had last seen each other and I didn't know how to behave. It seemed fitting that it should be lashing rain outside the window to match my mood.

I watched him anxiously as he ripped the top of the slender sugar packet and tipped it into the mug of black coffee. His hands were steady and his expression calm as he glanced up to find me watching him. I opened my mouth to speak but couldn't think of what to say and so closed it again. He smirked.

"How have you been," he asked me slowly, making each word clear and easy for me to understand. I still faltered.

"Umm, okay, I guess," I mumbled and he knitted his eyebrows together in frustration at me. He hates it when I mutter things.

"I miss you," I half whispered and he visibly flinched a little.

"I know," he replied coldly before taking a sip of his coffee.

"You never called me," I tried to say angrily but as always with Ivo I could only ever sound pleading and womanly.

Ivo glared at me then and I felt a shiver go down my spine.

"The thing I don't quite understand Tim," he started in a hushed tone. "Is exactly why you expect me to take you back."

He gave a sadistic smile at me then, taunting me.

"You see I was wrong to leave," he admitted carefully. "But at the same time, maybe it would be wrong to come back. I think you've made it quite clear Tim that you don't need me anymore."

"I already told you that nothing happened," I half cried, the stress of the moment making my throat dry and causing my voice to crack.

Ivo rested his hands under his chin and looked at me quizzically.

"Well it didn't look like that to me," he replied darkly. "See from where I was standing, it very much looked like you were sufficiently over me," he continued. "And you were quite definitely over someone else," he laughed harshly and I felt myself blush.

"It didn't mean anything," I mumbled and he once again gave me a dark look as he sipped his coffee. "I was lonely," I told him but he showed no sympathy.

"Don't you think it's a little odd that when you're lonely you go looking to please someone," he asked, seeming genuinely curious. He gazed at me for a minute, possibly expecting an answer but I had none so he moved on.

"It's always good to know that, what was it again? Oh yes, you don't love me," he said bitterly, "you never have and as soon as I am out of the picture you'll quite happily suck off some stranger from god knows where in our home."

"I do love you," I half shouted in anger and he closed his eyes.

"In our flat Tim," he hissed. We had drawn the attention of the tables around us. "In our bed," he laughed, clearly still shocked at the thought.

"I didn't sleep with him," I said hastily as if that would make the situation better.

"No, you didn't," he smirked at me. I wasn't sure what he meant by that but I chose to ignore his expression and he chose to change the subject.

"I take it you're staying at the coast," he asked before taking another drink of his now cold coffee, his eyes still surveying me.

I blinked at him.

"No, I sold the house months ago."

It was his turn to blink at me now.

"So where have you been staying?"

I shrugged and I could see his expression falter to one of concern.

"What does that mean," he demanded.

"I don't know, I'm just staying in a hostel," I replied quickly and he looked like I had just slapped him. He leaned back in his chair and ran his eyes over my figure before reaching across the table and grabbing my wrist.

I jumped in surprised and he held on tighter, pulling my sleeve up and wrapping his fingers around my wrist.

"You're thin," he spoke softly, a hint of a more tender Ivo on the horizon. I pulled my arm away and stared at the floor.

"Mmm," I half responded, not looking at him. I could hear him sigh after a few moments of tense silence.

"We're going to go and have some dinner," he told me gently. "And then we're going to get your things and you're going to come home, okay?"

I stared at him and he nodded at me to encourage me to stand. I felt like I could have been sick with elation as he took my hand in his and pulled me from the coffee shop to the car. I just stared at him the whole time, afraid that if I looked away he would vanish or it would turn out to be another one of my frequent and taunting dreams. But he was real and he was really here.

I burst into tears as he drove through the London traffic and he rested a hand on my knee while staring straight ahead through the windscreen.

"We'll figure it out," he nodded to himself.

"I've never loved anyone like I love you Ivo," I blurted out and I could see his grip on the wheel tighten a little. "I can't live without you," I stated simply. He let out a breath I didn't realise he had been holding.

"I know," he replied.