Will's Wails
It was the night after her funeral. Ella was gone. They buried her in attempt to bury their feelings.
But nothing would help the Herondales mourn the loss of their eldest child. Nothing seemed to take away the grief, nothing to help remember her less, nothing to patch the Ella-sized-hole that had been created in their heart.
Cecily Herondale, the youngest, was awoken with the screaming of her sister ringing through her ears in yet another nightmare, keeping her up all night.
Only being a quarter past midnight, Cecily was about to head downstairs to grab a drink, wash the tears from her cheeks
She heard the creak of a door opening a small way, then shutting quietly.
Will Cecily thought. Is that you?
After a few moments of silence, the crying began. It was undeniably Will, her parents slept in a room on the other side of their house, but Will's was just next to her's. And Ella's right across from his.
His crying startled her, beginning quietly, but slowly he began to increase the volume to which they were at. Will thought no one was listening. He thought everyone was sound asleep, so he allowed himself to cry louder.
Young Cecily Herondale heard her brother's cries, heard his pleas for their sister to come back. That he didn't mean it.
What Will didn't mean was unknown to Cecily. She kept listening, regardless.
An uncomfortable feeling settled over. She felt she was being intrusive.
She wanted to comfort her brother. Assure him that whatever he thought he did, he didn't. Tell him that this didn't change anything. Confide in him her secrets and her fears for Mommy and Daddy.
"I didn't mean it, Ella. Come back. Take my place. I don't deserve it," Will repeated until it became an unconscious whisper, all jumbled up. No indication that was what he was repeating until he rendered himself unconscious at all.
Cecily fell asleep soon after, remembering Will's cold face at the funeral. His emotionless face. How he refrained from crying, while his family sobbed until they were dehydrated from the amount of tears they shed for Ella.
He didn't comfort them either, just stood there. Like he was a ghost.
Cecily planned to confront him in the morning. She planned it all out in her head, their reunion, how they would bring the family back together. How she would fight away his nightmares and he hers.
But that opportunity never came.
Will had sent himself back to boarding school, immediately, all the way in London. It would be two years before she was able to go, she would have to stay in the school that was only two blocks away from their house.
And, within the time frame of a week, two of the Herondale children were gone.
Joy was reduced, stress and grief overwhelmed Mr and Mrs. Herondale, causing fights to break out within moments of the two arriving home from work over matters as simple as whose turn it was to cook dinner.
Cecily became an only child. It hurt too much to talk about Ella, and whenever Will was mentioned, her parents filled with rage.
It's his fault they'd insist. He left in a time that we needed him. A time we needed to be a family. He's the reason we're broken.
Cecily knew they hadn't heard his cries. His self blame.
But they didn't have to be so cruel, did they?
It couldn't have been Will's fault for their behavior. He was far away, all the way in London.
Cecily made herself promise that no matter how much her parents begged her not to, no matter how much she didn't want to, she would go to the boarding school. She promised this for Will. For how much she loved him.
He must be suffering so much she told herself. And she really did believe that. She believed that he was friendless, still broken, still crying every night for their lost sister.
He never came home for Thanksgiving, nor for Christmas, and not for Spring Break either. Each time, Cecily would wait up all night, praying and hoping that for once he'd come home, even if it was just to see her, even if it be only for one night and he didn't want their parents to know.
She was losing her sanity. Her parents were filled with grief and rage and they never were the same.
She was suddenly envious of Will. He could just leave, she couldn't, she was bound to this hell they called a home for at least another two years, if she was lucky. If she wasn't, she'd be here for the rest of her life, never escaping the endless amount of complaints that her parents had lined up for her.
But each time he didn't come home for a break, her hope depleted even further, causing her to swarm in her work, increase her intelligence, she couldn't let anything happen to her anymore, never again.
The one thing that kept her going every single day of her life, the thing she'd repeat over and over and over and over again until it got her up was the simple sentence, constructed of three simple words.
Will needs you.