/ / / Ma \ \ \
"Ma." Danny tried again.
"I never see you, Daniel."
"Ma. You are coming here soon."
"Yes, but what about Christmas, it's been three years since I've seen you on Christmas morning, and every year, every year it breaks my heart."
"Ma!" Danny said pleadingly and then threw a cushion at Steve's head where the other man was laughing.
"Your grandmother isn't getting any younger, she misses you, she misses Gracie-"
"She wants to see if your man is as hot in real life as he was in the pictures you sent," Danny's grandmother cut his mother off. "Now, while I am not ready for the old age home yet, I agree Daniel, it's been much too long since you were home.
"I am, Ma'am," Steve said the laughter evident in his voice. Danny wondered why they ever upgraded their phone to one with more than one handset.
"I like a confident man," Danny's Nana said. "But none of this ma'am crap, call me Lily."
"Yes, Ma'am," Steve said.
"Oh, you navy boys. I met the nicest navy men during the war; they'd all say ma'am to your face and then be trying to sneak their hands into your blouse when the lights were dark."
"Ma!" Danny's mum reprimanded.
"Okay, Lily," Steve said looking at Danny with such glee.
"Ma, Nana, I called for a reason."
"To break your mother's heart?" Lily asked with an evil chuckle.
"He's not calling to tell me he's coming home for Christmas."
"Ma," Danny started. "I told you, since Rachel is trying to take Grace to Vegas and I'm fighting her I just cannot get her for Christmas."
"That Rachel might have given me my first great, grandbaby but she isn't a very nice lady." Lily said.
"Nana, that was…nice."
Steve looked at Danny, Danny covered the phone with his hand. "When Rachel left me for Stan, my Nana cursed her left and right and every other way. She would have made Quentin Tarentino blush."
"Really?" Steve asked.
"Danny, stop whispering to your hottie," Lily said down the phone.
"Is Rachel going to be able to take Grace to Las Vegas?" Danny's mother asked.
"I don't know, Ma. Listen can we talk about why I called."
"Your uncle lives in Las Vegas," Lily said. "He can get you both a job."
"Ma," Danny's mum said. "Let him speak."
"Thanks, is Dad home?"
"He is, sweetheart, do you want me to get him?"
"Please, Ma."
"Are you sick?" Lily asked.
"No, Nana, we just want to talk to everyone at the same time."
"Ah," Lily said. "Hurry up, Elizabeth."
"Hello, Danny."
"Hey, Pop," Danny said. "Everyone's there?"
"Yes, Daniel, what is your news?"
"Steve and I have decided to get married."
"Well, it's about time," Lily said just before Danny's mother squeaked into the phone.
"Oh, Daniel, that is great news."
"I'm happy for you, son," Danny's father said gruffly. Danny knew he didn't quite know what to make of his suddenly altered sexual preferences but he had accepted it with the same gruff shrug and nod he had accepted everything Danny's whole life.
"Thanks, Pop."
"When are you getting married?" Danny's mother asked.
"Well," Danny started.
"We will be invited won't we? You're not going to do one of those horrible elopements…"
"Ma."
"…I know that a wedding can be stressful and everything but it doesn't matter…"
"Ma."
"…in the end because you are going to spend your whole life with that person and you…"
"Unless she turns out to be a cheating English…woman." Lily interjected.
"…should celebrate what is happening."
"Well, Ma'am," Steve started.
"Call me Lizzie, Steven," Danny's mother said. "I keep telling you."
"Lizzie, Danny and I were thinking we might have the ceremony when you come here next year."
"Oh, Steven, that is a lovely idea. See, Daniel, that is how it should be."
"Ma." Danny looked at Steve with a glare but his partner just grinned back.
"Yes, Daniel."
"Don't tell anyone, we're going to call today, make sure everyone can make it."
"I will have to invite the rest of the family if you're getting married."
"Nope," Danny said. "Just the ones I like, it's going to be small, in the backyard, but I promised Grace a new dress so we're having fancy outfits."
"I'll need a new dress," Lily said. "I can wear white too, since neither of you are virgins."
"Or women," Steve pointed out.
"I lived next to a gay man when I was a kid," Lily said. "He never said he was gay but the way he'd look at his 'roommate' wasn't fooling anyone, then he went off to war, never saw him again. Though I swear I saw someone who looked exactly like him on the news the other week. He was very good looking too, lovely jaw."
"Daniel, it's a wedding, you have to invite family."
"Ma, I let you convince me last time, this time I'm only inviting people I like. Uncle Ed, mum's brother," he threw in for Steve. "Aunty Emma and Aunty Jenny, dad's sisters. That's it."
"Good plan," his father said.
Danny could hear his mother's huff through the phone. "Okay, Daniel, if that is what you both want. I do hope you're not cutting down on Steve's guest list just because you are jaded about marriage."
"Ma!"
"It's okay, Mrs Williams, so long as Grace and Danny are there I'm happy."
"Oh, such a lovely young man," Lizzie said.
"And yet so full of shit," Lily threw in.
Steve looked so offended Danny couldn't hold in the laugh.
"Okay, Ma, we'll call again on the weekend when Grace is here," Danny said.
"Fine, bye Daniel, bye Steven."
"Bye, Lizzie, Lily." Steve said politely.
"Danny, send some more pictures of Steven and that nice Chin fellow, the ladies like to look at good looking young men."
"Okay, Nana," Danny said. "Talk to you later."
/ / / /
"I love your Nana," Steve said.
"Of course you do." Danny sighed and dialled his sister's number. "She is a terrible influence."
"Hello?"
"Hey, Molly, it's Danny."
"Congratulations on deciding to marry him," Molly said.
"Goddammit, I told her not to tell anyone."
Molly laughed in his ear. "Like that was ever going to happen."
/ / / /
"Hey, can I speak to Harvey please?"
"Who is calling?" Asked the female voice on the other end of the line.
"His brother, Danny."
"Just one moment," she disappeared for a moment. "Putting you through."
"Hey, Danny, what's up?"
"Where's the Jersey accent?"
"Buried under all my money," his brother, Harvey, responded without a pause.
"I called to tell you, you're going to have to get here when Ma and Pop come, I'm getting married."
"I know, Mum said."
"That woman is diabolical."
"Yep. I'll be there. I really need to go."
"Bye, Harvey."
/ / / /
"Hey, Danny, do not move Jonathon or I will not allow James to come and sleepover. I know about the wedding, we'll be there. Bye."
Danny hung up and looked at the phone; his sister had a lot of kids and that conversation about summed up most of them. Only one to go.
/ / / /
"Hey, Danny," Georgina said serenely down the line. She sounded calm and happy, like she always did, probably because she'd moved out of Jersey and didn't have a horrible job.
"Hi, Gee," Danny sighed.
"What's up, big brother?"
"Well, I have some news. Steve and I are going to get married when you all come to Hawaii."
"Excellent."
"She told you didn't she?"
"Of course, but you should get to tell your own news."
"Thanks, Gee, what's happening with you?"
/ / / /
"That woman," Danny said walking into the kitchen and into Steve's personal space for, though he would deny it, a hug. "Is better than the bloody mass media for getting information out."
"Beer?" Steve asked.
"Yes," Danny said with a smile and a kiss.