Just realized that Norman Reedus lives here in NYC and my friend found his address…but he's shooting The Walking Dead currently so he's not here. DANG IT!

Anyway…on with the story.

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Shouldn'ta yelled at her like that.

Daryl's mind was running wild and no matter how hard he tried to focus he couldn't shake the feeling he hadn't handled the situation the right way.

Hey, don't feel guilty! She doesn't need to be pokin' around in your business!

Daryl nodded, agreeing with the side of his mind that he was use to going to for comfort and self assurance. Every time his old man has pulled out that belt with the heavy metal buckle on the end, he tried to reason out why it always flew in his direction. That hard and heartless part of his mind was the only thing that made him stay strong and not become a victimized pansy, it had made him stronger, tougher, meaner…more like Merle. Merle was never on the receiving end of their father's drunken raging, not since he had stood up to their father and broken his nose.

Carol's not your father. You don't need to defend yourself from her.

Fuck that! Haven't you gotten it through your thick skull yet that no one could ever care about you? Even your own parents didn't want you.

Yeah, he had to admit that his darker thoughts had more reason behind them. Why would Carol or anyone else in that group give a shit about what he did or how he felt or what his past was like? His own parents never cared how he felt. Between his father's beatings and his mother's words he had fast learned to keep out of everyone's way and not draw attention to himself.

Anyway, the only reason she even knows you exist is because you, for some unknown reason, decided to try and be a knight in shining armor and volunteered to find her little wandering spawn.

Shut up, Sophia is as much my concern as anyone else in the group.

Why? She's nothing to you. Just another mouth to feed.

She's a little girl. She can't survive out here alone.

Survival of the fittest, Daryl.

That's bullshit. Survival is for the ones who look out for eachother.

They're all gonna be the death of you, you know that right? You're stronger on your own.

I'm alone on my own.

You're alone in this group. They'll never except someone like you as one of them.

Daryl's defensive side was thinking of a comeback when a raccoon bumbled out of the bushes to his left. He shut off his thoughts and took deadly aim with his crossbow. The raccoon never felt a thing, the arrow hit straight and true.

Sticking true to everything he knew about hunting and tracking, he remained silent and collected the raccoon without rustling a leaf in the process. Turning to the left, he continued his hunt but the thoughts returned as the thrill of the kill wore off.

I'm not alone…Carol notices me and she accepts me even when I'm awful to her.

She's a beaten wife, you ass. She's use to accepting anything from anyone. How are you any better than that worthless PTSD'd washout she was married to?

I'd never hit her.

You so sure about that?

That thought made Daryl shake his head angrily. Honestly, he wasn't sure what he was capable of sometimes, but he truly wanted to believe that he was strong enough to keep himself from being an abuser…but they say it passes down from abuser to victim in a long, vicious cycle.

No…no. No matter how angry he ever got, no matter how unreasonable a woman might be with him, he would never stoop so low as to be like his old man. Daryl Dixon was going to break that cycle if it meant breaking away from anyone who tried to bring him out of himself. Keeping hidden had saved his life many times before, now was no different, only a new type of hiding. Hiding inside himself to escape heartbreak instead of hiding in the woods to escape broken bones.

Speaking of broken bones…that deer with the limp left some fresh tracks. Daryl smiled grimly and began the art of tracking down his newfound prey.

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Carol had watched Daryl retreat into the woods across the field and sighed heavily. That man was a mystery to her. One minute he's giving her a flower, making promises to her and easing her troubled mind and aching heart, and the next he was breaking her down with that furious expression and his cutting words.

But one thing was for sure. Daryl had a past that she assumed he had kept very well hidden and protected from the world.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Dale's voice interrupted her reverie and she spun around with her hand over her heart.

"Ugh, Dale! You scared me nearly to death!"

"Well let's hope not, we need you here!" Dale chuckled.

Carol wondered just who might agree with him if they took a vote on that statement. Would Daryl vote to keep you around?

"Carol? Are you feeling alright?" Dale's humor had turned to immediate concern. He was looking at her with an expression of worry.

"I feel fine, Dale," Carol lied, she was getting good at lying. "Just worried about Sophia is all."

Dale nodded in understanding.

"We're all worried about her," he stated, looking out over the field as well. "But I think she's going to be alright. Daryl will find her."

Carol looked at Dale and scrunched her eyebrows in a silent question.

"You think he went back out there just to hunt?" Dale asked, raising an eyebrow. "Trust me, he'll be looking for her. And he won't give up until he finds her."

"Alive…or not," Carol finished. Dale didn't look pleased by her statement at all.

"That's no way to think, Carol," he said sadly, placing a hand on Carol's shoulder. She shrugged it off and started walking towards the edge of the field.

"I'm trying to figure out what to think, Dale," she replied softly before she turned her back to him, "Since the day I lost her, everything's a bit blurry. I just have to take it day by day."

"We all understand that, Carol," Dale said, nodding. He had the kindness to see her discomfort with the subject and excused himself to take up watch on top of the RV, relieving Glenn to go find Maggie.

Carol sat on the log just on the edge of the field and watched the edge of the woods like a hawk. She wasn't really sure what she was watching for. Maybe she was hoping her little girl would come walking out of them, doll in hand and smiling when she saw her mother…or maybe she was secretly waiting for Daryl to reappear, safe after his hunting endeavor and back home in the camp on Herschel's farm with the rest of his new family.

So this is pretty short, but it's like…2 A.M. and I have a 6 hour public transit scavenger hunt/training session tomorrow morning at 8 so I'm gonna go to bed. My team is gonna win because I have been on Vancouver's, Dublin's, Chicago's AND London's subways so I know how they work