"The more connections you and your lover make, not just between your bodies, but between your minds, your hearts, and your souls, the more you will strengthen the fabric of that relationship, and the more real moments you will experience together" - Barbara De Angelis

Why? Why oh why did I think this was a good idea?

I was in the city. I hated the city and yet I was there. It was warm, uncomfortably so. I wiped my brow with the back of my hand, but it didn't really help.

I was trying to change, so my mind (naturally) came to the conclusion that I would have to do stuff that I wouldn't normally do, like visit the city. So I decided to go shopping.

I was regretting this. It was too warm, too crowded and I hadn't even seen something worth buying.

My thoughts were disrupted by the sound of my ringtone. Taking my phone from my pocket I was confused by the sight of a number I did not recognise.

Hitting answer, I spoke my default phone greeting "Hello. Smith Kaito speaking"

I could hear the sound of breathing, but not much else "...Hello? Who is this?" I asked

"K...Kaito?" It was Hanako!

"Hanako? Is that you?"

"Yes"

I broke out into a stupidly large smile "Hey! Hi, uh...How are you? What's up?"

"U-Um...I...um..." Hanako stuttered "If...If you're not busy...I-I was wondering if y-you would...l-like to...m-"

"Meet up?" I guessed

"Yes!" she said loudly, before taking a moment to rein in her voice again "U-Um...I mean..."

"Where you wanna' meet?" I asked "School? Shanghai?"

"I-I'm in...the city..."

Well that was a surprise. I wouldn't have expected her to go alone. Then again I was in the city too, so I guess I couldn't talk "Me too. Where are you?"

Hanako managed to give me the street and basic directions, so it wasn't long before I found her. She was at a quiet little café. Sitting outside, as well. I never expecting that level of confidence from her, to calmly sit at a table in the view of pedestrians. Maybe this was what Lilly was talking about when she meant Hanako would grow without me.

"Are you feeling okay?" she asked me as I sat down. I must have looked a bit red in the face.

"Yeah" I answered, smiling to prove it "Just a bit warm. Fake legs are tiring"

She nodded as if she understood. She was in the same casual stuff she wore on that night out we all had. She looked nice.

Hanako caught me staring, and looked down at the table. Then, along came a waitress with a cup of tea. Hanako almost automatically turned her head away slightly, just enough to hide her scars. The waitress still saw it though, although her eyes fell on the scarring on the back of Hanako's hand.

The young woman's eyes flickered to me, whereupon she greeted me with a practiced smile "Hiya, you wanting something?"

"Um..." I quickly looked at the menu "Mango smoothie?" It was the first thing I saw.

The waitress nodded, took note and almost bounced back inside. Was everyone in the city that hyper?

Hanako looked back up, adjusting her hat a little as she said "N-No hot chocolate...?"

"Uh..." I scratched the back of my head "It was the first thing I saw" I chuckled a little at my admittance "Besides, I need something cooler. Too warm for hot chocolate"

She nodded as she took a sip of her tea, silently drinking while I waited on my smoothie.

My smoothie came pretty quickly if I was honest. Handing the bouncing waitress some money, she left to go answer another customer's call. Why did she seem to skip everywhere?

"Do..." Hanako spoke up "Do you think that she looks...pretty...?"

What? Oh. "I...guess" I shrugged "I was more wondering how someone could be so hyper and bouncy"

Hanako seemed to process my response before asking another question "Did you have many...friends, before Yamaku?"

I thought about "Nah. There was a whole bunch of people that I used to talk to, but there was only really one, no, two people that I really considered friends"

"Do you still talk to them?"

I sadly shook my head "No. I was in hospital for a long time. We grew apart"

"You're not...saddened by that?" she asked me "Or angry?"

"Angry, no. Sad...maybe just a little" I admitted "They had lives to live. They moved on when I wasn't there. I don't blame them for that. I wasn't...great after it all. I still think about them, when I can. Sometimes the memories just...flash back in my head for a bit, then go. They make me sad, but I remember them being happy times as well, so it's not all bad I guess" I took a drink of my smoothie (turns out I liked mango) "Besides," I smiled "I made new friends when I came here, right?"

Hanako blushed a little as we continued to drink in silence, just enjoying each others company. She seemed to grow calmer and calmer the longer we sat together. She was still fiddling with her hair a little.

"How did you get my number?" I asked her

"L-Lilly...gave it...to me"

While I was silently wondering how Lilly knew my number, Hanako brought out her own phone (it was just like mine, only pink) "W...Would you l-like my-"

"Phone number? I got it when you called me"

She shook her head "No...E-Email address?"

Ah, right. I nodded my head, bringing out my own phone so I could give her mine in return "I like your phone. It's like mine"

Hanako smiled at that "Thank you. I didn't pick it out myself though"

"Huh?"

"It was a present, from Lilly"

I nodded. That made sense.

"I never really needed a phone, and I couldn't afford one" she continued "She bought me one for Christmas, though, saying that we should use it to keep in touch"

That confused me a little, considering that they saw each other everyday. Then again, she was away now. I guess she was just planning in advance (very clever).

"You like Lilly, don't you?"

She nodded "She's my friend. I...love her...very much" Hanako smiled as she thought about her. I wish I had a friend that I cared that much about. Of course, there was Hanako, but a part of my mind didn't really call her a friend any more. She was...more, I think, than that.

There was a brief exchange of email addresses, and then I properly added Hanako to my contact list.

"Done" Hanako smiled "That makes three now"

"Three?"

"Lilly, Akira and you" she explained

Oh, she was talking about phone numbers "Oh right. I have...five now" I smiled a bit to know that Hanako had more friends than just me and Lilly "You have Akira's number? She's nice, isn't she?"

"She is. Her suit makes her...look a bit cool"

"I thought her job would mean she didn't talk to people a lot" I wondered aloud.

Hanako smiled a little as she took another sip of her tea "She always tries, though" She looked at me again "You have...five, you said?"

"Yeah" I didn't really want to say that two were my parents. I didn't want to somehow remind her that she was an orphan. "How many do you think Lilly has?"

"More than all of us combined" she joked with a giggle. It was nice to hear her laugh. It was nice to hear her be that comfortable around me. Days like this, I almost felt like I knew the real Hanako and not just the walls she puts up.

"You don't talk to a lot of people" I noted "Do you?"

Hanako shook her head.

"You never want to make more?" I never really cared for a large circle of friends myself, but I knew that some people did care about stuff like that.

"...No" Was her answer "I don't really...like people" She seemed to take me tilting my head as a request for her to explain "In middle school, I got bullied...a lot. I was called names, and got excluded from work groups and sports teams. There were...worse things, too"

I nodded in understanding. I wasn't exactly popular in school either as a result of my Caucasian looks. It wasn't the same as burn scars, but it was something "And now you don't like people. I get it"

Hanako shook her head "I...That happened in...elementary school"

I felt bad for making her sad. As I sat there, staring at her phone, an idea formed in my head. Finishing my smoothie, I got out of my seat "I'll be back" I told her "Wait here"

"W-What? W-Where are you g-going?"

"Just wait! I'll be back, I swear!"

I ran for a bit as I came to a shop I had passed on the way to the café. It was full of gimmicky trinkets so I hadn't felt the desire to go in. But now I did. I quickly bought what I wanted and ran back. I dropped the small bag on the table in front of her.

Hanako stared at the little bag "Is this...?"

"For you" I nodded with a smile "Want to see?"

Hanako looked unsure "B-But..."

"Come on" I insisted

So eventually, she did give in and opened up the small gift. It was a little silver chain to decorate her phone, with a little flower on the end. Her eyes lit up when she saw it. She wasn't sad any more. She put the little chain back on the table and looked up at me, confused "But...it's not...Christmas, or my birthday..."

I shook my head "Doesn't matter. I saw it, I thought you'd might like it, so I got it"

She smiled at the chain again, but still look unsure "I-I don't have anything to give to you..."

I shrugged. I didn't want anything in return "You're smiling. That's enough"

She smiled at that, maybe with a bit more colour in her face though.

"Besides," I continued "You're my...friend" I guess it was easier to call her "friend" as opposed to "person-that-I-like-like-but-is-too-scared-to-admit-it-etc.-etc." (too much of a mouthful) "Friends can give each other random presents sometimes"

"Friends..." she smiled. She eventually nodded, taking the chain and attaching it to her phone "Thank you...Kaito"

Her smile was beautiful. I found myself smiling back "You're welcome"

I gazed up at the sky, the sun was starting hide to behind the buildings, which reminded me "Won't be long before we have to get back to school" I rose to my feet "You coming?"

"Y-Yes" She nodded, putting her phone away as we left for the bus station together. We didn't talk, and Hanako never really looked at me, but she had a smile, so I was happy.

Hanako wasn't in her seat when I turned up to class. Hisao, Shizune and Misha were there though. I said hi, got to my seat and got to thinking.

Hanako had been on my mind a lot since our talk in the city. I'll admit that wasn't much of a change but it was now more and more prominent. I wasn't sure how I was meant to describe our relationship now. I liked her, I wanted to help her. I felt deeply for her, more than I felt for any other friend. On the other hand, I felt like I barely knew her at times. If I were to suddenly grow a spine and admit my feelings somehow, how would she take it? Would she be disgusted? Would she brush it off with the "better than friends argument"? Or would she say yes, and what would I do after that? On the other hand, I may be completely wrong about the signals I was getting off of her. I wasn't very good with people after all so it was very likely I misinterpreted something.

I lifted my head to the sound of footsteps coming into class. It was Miki. Not long after came Hanako.

I may have stared at Hanako as she came in. Our eyes met, but no words where said, and she went to her seat.

I spend more time in the library now than I do in my room. I was trying to study, but was finding my book incredibly dull. Studying never came easily to me.

I had spent lunch that day with Hanako. We had eaten in silence so I was never able to pop my question. It was frustrating, wanting to be closer to someone who just kept pushing you away.

"A-Are you busy...?" came a voice. It was Hanako

"Hanako?" I admittedly exclaimed pretty loud. She had surprised me. She backed up a little as I spun to look at her "Sorry" I said sheepishly "That was loud. You spooked me" I closed my book over so as to give her my full attention "What's up?"

Hanako still seemed a little shaken by my reaction earlier, she said "I was just...w-wondering what you were r-reading..."

I put the book away on the nearest shelf "Chemistry" I answered

"H-Has it helped?"

I shrugged "It confirmed I didn't like chemistry, but other than that...nope"

Hanako smiled a little, which made me feel better. She didn't seem so put off anymore. Looking at her, I couldn't help but think about her, or precisely what I didn't know about her.

"I-Is something...wrong?" she asked me. I guess I was making a face.

I looked at her. Finding no gentle way to ask the question, I decided to be blunt. All this time I was afraid I'd upset her, but maybe Lilly was on to something when she suggested change. Maybe Hanako had changed as well "Can I ask something?"

"O-Okay"

I took a deep breath before voicing the question "What...What was your life like, before this? Before Yamaku?"

There was a long pause. I was afraid I had upset her and was about to apologise when she nodded (a slow stiff nod) and spoke "Okay. B-But in return...you have to t-tell me about your life as well..."

I nodded an "Okay" and followed her to leave the library so we could speak somewhere private. This turned out to be the hallway.

"You uh, want me to start?" I asked. She nodded, so with a sigh I started "I lived with my parents before coming here. I was in the hospital for a year or so, I spent my education there. The doctors said that I had stayed in the hospital long enough, that I had to go back out and get back into the world, to be normal again. They and my parents thought that Yamaku would be best for me, since they had all their fancy helper stuff. It was the first time I stayed somewhere without parents checking in"

"It must have...been hard on you" Hanako noted.

"Well...yeah" I shrugged "I'd never been far from my parents. I uh..." I chuckled a little awkwardly "I kind of always relied on them, even before my accident. I was uh, not very independent" There was silence as I finished "What uh, what about you?"

Hanako was silent as a group of other students passed us. She hid behind me, her body pressed almost flat against mine. When they were gone, she edged away back to the normal distance "The staff at the o-orphanage offered me some options on what I could do. Middle school...hadn't been good, so I though Yamaku might be better. It was isolated, and I thought it might be easier to get by here with most of the others being disabled"

"What was it like, in the orphanage?" I asked

Hanako seemed to think about her response "It was...okay. The staff there were nice, and they took care of us. The children there didn't talk to me much, but I didn't really want to talk with them either, so I didn't mind. The orphanage had a little library, so I started to read to pass the time. The staff didn't mind it, because it made me easier to handle than many of the other children"

Ah, the small cynical part of me figured that the staff enjoyed a quiet child. They likely encouraged her worst habits to ensure easy days. While I sympathised, I was left wondering if they would regret what that kind of work ethic had on the girl "No friends?" I asked.

"No" she shook her head "I think...my life was on hold...during that time. I knew that, but I didn't mind"

To think her life was on hold for all that time. Nearly her whole life without parents, friends or even distant relatives. I couldn't imagine a life like that. I always had my parents. My friends, though few, were always close. I had so many relatives on both my parents' sides that I couldn't even remember all their names, even on a good day.

We walked our way across the courtyard, the sun now starting to set.

"What was it like in the hospital?" Hanako asked me.

"Quiet" I admitted "My friends came to visit for the first few months after I woke up. But...it's like I said. They had lives to live, and I wasn't always the best company. My head was hazy, I had mood swings, I..." I shut myself up "So they showed up less and less and then...that was it. They were gone. Then it was bad for a long time. There was my parents telling me I wouldn't be going back to my old school and there was the time I had my birthday in the hospital, that was...lonely"

We were walking through the gardens now. There was the odd bystander that passed, but otherwise we were alone "It got better of course, I guess" I continued "After a while, physical therapy started up and I had something to do, a routine, something to look forward to"

"What was your middle school like?"

"It was nice" I smiled, happy memories coming to me as I spoke "It was a crowded school, but not too bad I guess. My friends kept me company. We would laugh, fool around, sometimes cry together if we really needed to. My grades were never the best, but they were good. There was always the odd idiot that made fun of my parentage and looks, but they grew less and less as I grew up and got bigger than everyone" It felt a bit weird to talk about my past. A part of me looked back on it as the life of another guy, someone that wasn't disabled, wasn't separated from his family. But I knew, deep down, that my past would stay with me and that it was mine.

As we went into the girls dorm, Hanako clung to me again. It was different though this time. It was less of a hold-on-for-dear-life-death-grip and more of a gentler hold, like the way I was taught to hold someone's hand, or my cat.

I walked with her to her room. "Why are we here?" I asked her. I hadn't really been planning on going anywhere so I was more or less just following Hanako around. She didn't respond though, rather just staring at me "Hanako?"

She didn't speak. Rather she went inside her room, leaving the door open. I followed her inside.

She spoke before I did "Could you...close and lock the door?"

I did as she asked, turning back to find her drawing the curtains. What was she up to? It would be night soon. I had to get back to my room. Why would she have me lock the door?

Hanako continued to stand by the curtains, her back faced towards me "You told me about your past, so I have to tell you mine" she said. She removed her ribbon and started to unbutton her blouse.

"Wait" I said. Hanako was going to strip, like I did. I wasn't ready for something like that, at least I didn't think I was. I wasn't sure how I'd react. My body was already reacting to the mere thought of her naked. "H-Hanako..."

"P-Please..." she said "Don't say anything"

So I stayed silent as she shed her blouse, followed soon after by her bra. Everything was happening so slowly, or maybe that was just my mind playing tricks. I kept staring as Hanako removed her skirt, letting it drop to the floor.

And so there she stood. Bare save for only her underwear and stockings "This is me" she said "All of me"

Naturally, my eyes immediately fell on the scars on her back. On the right hand side her skin was scarred like her face, tightened discoloured tissue that covered her shoulder, buttock and thigh. This was it. Just like my life had been forever changed by my accident, so was Hanako's. A part of me was shocked that such injuries could be survived, but then again I had also defied death as well. What a pair we made.

"The fire happened when I was eight years old" she told me "It was night, and we were sleeping when it started" Her voice trembled alongside her body "I...curled up into a ball...when the fire swept over me. My mother...tried to shield me. Th-That's the only reason...I lived..." Tears began to fall from her beautiful eyes as her memories surfaced.

So her parents did die in the fire. My heart was warmed by the idea of a mother so devoted to her child that she would give her life for them. But then a horrible thought set in: Hanako's mother shielded her from fire. Hanako witnessed her mother burn to death. Witnessed her likely scream and cry as she was cooked alive. The idea of watching my own mother suffer such a fate...I rubbed my eyes to try and banish the thought.

I wanted to say something, anything, to make her feel better. I couldn't though. My own mind and mouth would not work together. I felt so close to her, yet so distant at the same time.

"I'm sorry..." she said, her voice trembling with tears "For making you see this"

"No" I whispered, before repeating it with a stronger voice "No". I had to say it now. There would be no other better time. We were both at our most vulnerable, our closest. I had to say what I truly, honestly, believed "Never be sorry" I said "Not for this. You're beautiful, Hanako. I think you're beautiful, no matter what you may think"

She just stared at me, her breathing heavy and uneven. I went to her and put a hand on her shoulder, her scarred shoulder. She turned to properly face me, her front now bare to me. She gasped, not in fear, but surprise.

It was strange, to feel her skin under my hand. The scar tissue was dry and leathery to touch. My hand lifted and ran its fingers through silken hair and rested on her cheek, the unblemished skin softer to the touch.

Hanako was beautiful, regardless of her scars. Her face and eyes were entrancing to look at and her body alluringly curved. Her chest was large enough that I noticed, but not cartoonishly big in that way that it looked anatomically impossible.

"I know...that I'm not pretty...like Lilly" she said, her head drooped with her gaze on the floor "I just...wanted you...to see me. The real me"

I shook my head and sighed. How could I make it any more plain? I wished I could find the words to describe how I felt about her. She was beautiful. It was that obvious to me. I gently placed my hand underneath her chin, so I could tilt her gaze to meet mine "I already have. You may not believe me, but you are pretty. You are amazing. Beautiful. You didn't have to take your clothes off to make me see that"

She looked at me, her eyes glistening and uncertain and lips parted. My feelings were a jumble of emotions and warm, physical sensations that baffled my admittedly childish mind. Without knowing why, I pressed my lips against hers, Hanako rising on her toes to meet me halfway.

The kiss only lasted for the briefest moment, but it was my first. The sensation of her lips on mine sent a fire of powerful feelings throughout my body and mind, like I had been struck by lightning. We parted, both breathless, neither breaking line of sight.

My hormones taking over, I found myself taking off my own clothing. Hanako didn't look at me, rather choosing to stare at the floor.

Soon I was only standing in my boxer shorts, both our scarred bodies bare to each other, both of us vulnerable.

"H..." I internally cursed the awkwardness in my voice "Hanako..."

The pair of us walked to the bed, our movements stiff and nervous. I was the first to sit, looking up at her with a look I could only hope looked charming and inviting. I must have done something right, because she decided to sit between my legs, her bare back against my chest. A rush of sensations overwhelmed me, mainly the feeling of a female rear against my groin. She smelled great as well. She was a little sweaty, but her hair still smelled of some kind of shampoo and it was soft and silky under my chin.

I tried to keep a smile on my face as I tried to make her comfortable. My stump arm awkwardly rested against her side while my hand moved to cup her breast. The sound of her breath hitched slightly as she tried to stifle a squeal of surprise.

"Sorry" I mumbled, my voice barely louder than a whisper "Didn't mean to uh...make you startled" I waited for Hanako's breath to settle a little before gently rubbing her nipple with my thumb, while also massaging the breast itself. It felt nice in my hand. It didn't take long before her body began to relax into mine, her breathing slowing at the same time. The feeling of her nipple hardening from my touch was strange, but I took it as a sign that I was doing something right.

Eventually my hand left her breast, making Hanako whine a little in the process, and slowly ran down her body till I reached her crotch, massaging her womanhood in slow circles with my fingertips. Her body was firmly pressed into mine by this point, her full weight sinking into me, her warmth relaxing and arousing me. She gasped a little as my fingers stopped rubbing her in circles and changed to a more digging motion, my fingers curling into the groove of her labia. My motions grew faster and faster as my instinctive want grew in intensity. I wanted her. All of her.

I stopped moving my fingers, Hanako sighing as her hips unconsciously gyrated to try and meet my fingers. Her face looked to mine a little. Her look silent, but her eyes looked as if she was waiting for something.

Shuffling away from her, Hanako slid on to her back, laying her head against the pillow, her breathing coming in ragged pants.

Her panties were slightly darkened by her own sweat and other fluids, her chest was heaving and her eyes just stared into mine with longing. I had no words to describe the euphoria I felt.

I laid a hand on her crotch and looked at her expectantly. At her nod I started the laborious task of removing her stockings with only a single hand. Hanako must have grown impatient as she took the matter into her own hands, taking the stockings off just far enough that I could move her underwear. Rather than attempting to remove them completely, I simply decided to move the crotch to the side so that her vagina was accessible.

Gently brushing my fingers against her, my hand moved to my own clothing. Rather than rising to properly remove them, I merely unbuttoned the front of my boxers, my erection now free from its confines.

Her body tensed as I approached her. I eyes widened a little at the sight of my manhood. Was I scaring her? I couldn't imagine I was that big?

"Are you okay?" I asked her.

She did not verbally respond, rather gulping and nodding her head.

I laid my hand on her leg, massaging the thigh softly as I spoke "It's okay if you're not" I told her "Just tell me when, and I'll stop" I wouldn't be altogether happy if I was stopped, but I'd stop regardless if it was what she wanted.

She nodded again, her body a little more relaxed, as I leaned down and kissed her again. I felt her tongue in my mouth that time; a peculiar but pleasant sensation. As I sat up again, I gently drew Hanako as close to me as possible and, with a trembling hand, guided myself inside her.

"Aahn!" Hanako yelped as I thrust for the first time. I had to take a moment just to process the rush of pleasure and other sensations that momentarily short-circuited my brain.

Taking note of the pained grimace on the girls face, my second motion was as slow and as gentle as I could manage. I was still just as much of a novice at sex as she was, so neither really what each other were capable of withstanding, pleasure or pain-wise. I didn't want to hurt her. Hanako opened her eyes and, upon seeing my face, attempted to smile. Sadly, she couldn't really hide her discomfort.

She didn't tell me to stop though, so after a few moments I started again, my ministrations as careful as I could manage under the circumstances.

I won't deny it, we probably looked pretty awkward. My hips weren't used to movements like thrusting, so my movements, while gentle, were stiff and awkward. Not to mention the feeling inside Hanako was so warm and soft that I had to constantly remind myself to keep the motions constant and regular. Hanako's gasps and her own gyrating hips just added several other layers of overwhelming pleasure.

Hanako's hair was beginning to cling to her face from the sweat, and her face still appeared to be in pain. Her scarred body appeared to be making her stiff. Unsure what to do, I tried to scoop her body up with my arm which only resulted in a bit of squirming on both our parts.

We eventually did settle on a position that left us both satisfied. I sat up while Hanako straddled my lap. With the stress off her scarred back, Hanako started to relax as my hips began to move again. I held her against me as she began roll her hips with my movements, her breathing escaping in quiet moans. The scent of her filled my senses as my breathing became more and more erratic.

As we continued, our movements became less measured as we started to lose ourselves to each other, our bodies hungering for more. I sped up as I was filled with wave upon wave of pleasure, no longer caring for restraint (which I don't think Hanako was caring about any more either).

"Ha..." I grunted as I tried to say her name "Hana...Hanako!"

She reached her climax just before I did. Her shriek seemed to ring out and the muscles of her netherregions seemed to clench around me, bringing me to my own climax with a final powerful thrust. I could feel my penis twitch within her as released myself with my own ragged sigh of an orgasm.

Energy spent, I lay back as Hanako fell on top of me, her own exhausted body not even having the energy to remove herself from my manhood. I could hear her panted breaths in her ear as we lay there, our naked sweaty bodies pressed against each other. With herculean effort, I managed to roll Hanako off of me. Now she lay beside me, our bodies pressed close together so that we could share the single bed, nestled in my intact arm.

I couldn't say whether or not our first time went well, but I could say that I enjoyed myself. I looked at Hanako, her face a clouded mask of dazed euphoria and fading discomfort. I suppose I probably enjoyed myself the most out of the two of us. Nevertheless, when our eyes met she smiled at me, and that was a genuine smile. The perfect Hanako smile that made me warm to the very core.

With a tired arm, I drew her in close for a kiss. "Good...Goodnight, Hanako" I panted.

Hanako never responded, rather deciding to curl into me, her head resting in the crook of my neck with a pleased sigh.

I sighed as well. I suppose in times like these, words weren't truly needed.

I fell asleep quickly that night, content with the warm, beautiful girl at my side.

Authors Note

Well, that happened.

This is the first time I've written anything remotely close to smut/sex/whatever so forgive me if it's trash.

See you guys later, I'm off to take a cold shower