Author's Note:
So, SOA is finally over and I had this scene playing in my head since before the final episode aired. I was one of the few people who got the advance copy of the book before it was suppose to be released so I knew the ending of the series even before it ended. I wanted to give people time to see the finale before posting this.
Was I happy with the ending?
Absolutely. I feel like for the first time, Jax had a choice in which course he wanted to take his life. And he chose wisely. In my head, he has reunited with the people he loved the most.
XOXO
Chapter 15
Freedom.
As a kid, that word was always engrained in his head.
Freedom from the government.
Freedom from society.
Freedom from everything and everyone.
That was the code he was suppose to live by. Ironic that he didn't know the true meaning of the word until now.
The sun beamed high in the sky as he made his way down the highway, cop sirens blaring behind him.
He was never free- Gemma made sure of that. She had plans.
Since he was born, he was shackled to the MC, his life predestined for him before he was even born.
All his life he was brainwashed to think that he was free to do whatever he pleased. But it took the death of his wife for him to realize that Gemma was the master puppeteer in all the decisions taken.
She made sure he stayed behind when Tara offered him a way out back when they were teens. Clay and the club became his first priority even though he loved Tara more than anyone. Brotherhood, loyalty and freedom... That was always Clay's and Gemma's selling point anytime his view on the club became askew.
Jax scoffed as he thought of the idea. All three were lies when it came to Clay and Gemma.
Clay shitted on the idea of brotherhood each time he made decisions that harmed SAMCRO on the long run.
Gemma and her obsession with loyalty. In the end, she was not loyal to anyone but herself. She killed the one person who she should have been most loyal to besides himself-Tara. Tara who raised Abel and Thomas with the purest of all love.
And Freedom. When he was a kid, they use to tell him that freedom and the MC world ran paralleled to one another yet, they kept him imprisoned in the life even when he was so desperate to leave it.
He saw a flock of crows flying in the distances, the sirens getting louder as he rode on the same road his father was killed on.
Crows circling around him, waiting for his long overdue death.
It should had been him in that kitchen floor...
Tara was the only constant light in his life and his mother made sure to get rid of it once she knew that he would love Tara above her.
He smiled as he thought of his beautiful wife. She was the only one who saw him for who he really was even in the darkest times. She believed in him whenever he doubted himself. Believed he was a good man when truly he was a monster.
He killed to quench some inexplicable anger he felt within him. At first, he didn't understand it but now he knew where the root of it was.
It was within him. Gemma raised him to live his life in a code that was based on lying and killing. And he lost his wife and best friend because of it.
He had promised Tara that it would be better. That it would get better. Instead, things turned into a shit storm and their relationship digressed in the process. Instead of helping her get the boys out of Charming, he was fucking old madams,breaking every promise he made to her.
Instead of focusing on his family, he focused on the club and now his boys were without the one constant in their life.
Wendy was no Tara. He made sure to set her up so the boys could have a better would be there for them and as much as he wanted to believe in her, he doubted her abilities to be a good Mom. Wendy always crumpled under pressure and he only hope that Nero would keep her above water in the toughest of times.
He had promised Tara that his boys, their boys, wouldn't grow up in the life and if it meant them hating him, then so be it. He had destroyed everything that would connect them to him, not making the mistake JT made when he left his manuscript behind.
He saw a bend on the highway, a semi coming directly from the other side.
He smiled when he thought of the irony.
His boys were out of Charming like he promised Tara.
He set the MC in right path like he promised Opie.
It was finally time.
Finally time to be free.
This is what free feels like, he thought as he stretched his arms to his side, the semi in front of him.
This is freedom.