Bella's POV:
I slammed the door shut behind me as I entered my house glad Charlie wasn't home to witness all the walls shaking.
I was no longer really mad, more sad that Jake had something he couldn't or wouldn't tell me. I was also confused as to why I felt so irrationally guilty for hurting Paul. I couldn't explain it but I had to admit it wasn't an unwelcome feeling because along with that guilt it was as if there was something in the back of my mind telling me I'd have plenty of time in the future to make up for hurting him.
I headed up to my room to try and relax and pulled a book I had recently started reading off my desk. I had been reading for maybe a half hour when the doorbell rang at the same time as my phone starting to vibrate in my pocket.
Answering my phone I started to head to the stairs.
"Hello?" I said with mild irritation at having to stop reading.
"Bells please just listen before you hang up" I heard Jacob's familiar voice spit out quickly "We are having a bonfire tonight at First Beach. If you come we can explain everything to you."
"So earlier when I wanted to hear it you wouldn't tell me but now you will? What's changed in a little under 3 hours that makes now so different from then?" I had been perfectly calm until I heard his voice again.
"It just is different Bella please come!" Jake sounded desperate as the door bell rang again.
"Coming!" I shouted to the door as I tried to race down the stairs. Maybe that wasn't such a great plan cause next thing I know I'm falling head over heels down the last 4 or 5 steps. "Ouch" I groaned as I stood up delicately testing my legs.
"What happened?" I could hear worry flood my friend's voice.
"Just me being me. I'll think about coming." I said and clicked my phone shut and opened the door.
I gasped in surprise as I saw a massive Paul standing in front of me. He stared at me worry filling his still captivating gray eyes. "Are you alright?" He asked "I heard a crash, I was going to break down the door if you didn't answer" He started rambling and I giggled softly.
"I'm fine probably just another handful of bruises to add to my collection" I joked and widened the opening allowing him to duck into the foyer. I wasn't sure what had come over me. I would never allow someone I had just met into my house at least not without Charlie and his gun around but I felt inexplicably safe. Like no matter what I did or what I said Paul wouldn't hurt me.
"Are you sure?" He gazed at me skeptically.
"Ya really I am fine." I said standing back to show him I really was in one piece and no harm really done. "What are you doing here Paul?" I suddenly questioned remembering my emotions from earlier.
"I just wanted to apologize" his deep, velvety voice crooned. "And make sure you were safe."
"Oh" I said mildly disappointed. Dammit why on Earth was I disappointed!?
"I didn't mean 'sweetheart' in a patronizing way." He continued trying to explain his earlier words.
"It's ok Paul. I'm not mad anymore" and I wasn't. I don't think I could ever be truly mad at this man in front of me as annoyed as that made me "I shouldn't have freaked out the way I did. I just miss my best friend" I sighed.
He took a step towards me then pulled himself back. "No harm, no foul" He said reaching out a hand to shake with "Well no lasting harm, no foul" He joked grinning widely at me.
I felt a warm blush creeping up my cheeks as I took his hand "Thanks" I grinned back at him.
"Are you coming to the bon fire tonight?"He asked and my grin broadened at the eager look in his eyes.
"I haven't decided yet." I said honestly. "Jacob just called me, hence my little trip down the stairs"
He looked at me sadly and I wanted so badly to make him feel better. Ugh now I was mad at myself. I know nothing of this man and I want nothing more than to make him happy! What is wrong with me? I found myself questioning my sanity.
"I would really love to see you there" He said kicking the ground in an almost shy and bashful manner.
"I'll think about it" I said although I knew I had already decided that I would definitely be going to the bonfire if Paul was going to be involved "Maybe I'll see you later?"
The grin that graced his handsome face reminded me almost of the Cheshire cat as his gray eyes sparkled happily. I opened the door and he slipped past me with a grace I could only wish to have.
I closed the door behind him and leaned against it letting out a small shriek of excitement. My excitement was quickly countered by panic. What was I going to wear!?! Where was Alice when I needed her most?
I managed to race up the stairs without killing myself and threw open my closet digging furiously. I will admit I went girly and tried on at least ten outfits before thinking of the brown vest and tight white top I had gotten in Phoenix. Although it was almost Christmas it was still fairly warm and I knew that as long as I stayed next to the bon fire I'd be fine. I kept on the jeans I had worn and threw on the shirt and vest.
I redid my hair to a half up half down style and put on just a touch more makeup than I had in the morning.
"Bella you home?" I heard my dad shout up the stairs as he got home from work.
"Ya dad just for a bit longer though. I'm going to La Push tonight for a bon fire with Jacob and the guys." I told him making my way down the stairs carefully. That fall earlier had hurt like hell although I wasn't going to tell anybody that. Far too embarrassing.
"That's great Bells!" Charlie exclaimed "You and Jake made up then?" He hung his holster on the hooks near the door and smiled at me.
"We're getting there I think" I said "We have a lot to talk about and hopefully tonight we get whatever is going on with him sorted out."
I went into the kitchen and stirred the spaghetti sauce I had started before getting dressed. I knew if I didn't make dinner for Charlie before I left he'd just end up ordering pizza or going to the diner which was fine sometimes but after my weeklong absence I wanted him to have something healthier.
"Something smells good" Charlie commented as he grabbed a beer from the fridge and came to see what was cooking.
"I am just going to cook the pasta for you and then I am going to head off dad." I explained "If that's alright with you?"
"Of course Bella, you know I don't mind you spending time in La Push. Especially with Jacob" He gave me a half-hearted sideways hug distracted because his game was supposed to start pretty quick.
"Go dad" I urged laughing as I caught him glancing at the clock "I will bring you dinner before I leave"
He gave me a sheepish smile and headed to the living room and shortly I could hear the sounds of whatever sports game he had on tonight filtering through the house. I shook my head still smiling. Some things never changed. Charlie wasn't very good at or comfortable with showing his emotions but I knew he loved me and worried endlessly about me.
The spaghetti cooked quickly and I was ready to go about a half hour later. The bon fire started at 7 according to a text Jake had sent me even though I hadn't told him I was coming. That gave me 20 minutes to get out to the reserve and down to the beach.
"Bye dad!" I called as I shut the door behind me. I think I heard a quick goodbye but who knows. When Charlie watches the game I don't think he'd notice a bomb go off just outside our living room window.
It took me 15 minutes to get to the beach and I made my way carefully to the beach. I could see all the guys from earlier surrounding a slowly growing flame. Billy was in his wheelchair off to the side with what looked like all the Quileute elders. I didn't even try to stop the smile that spread across my face as I went to join them. Now here's hoping I don't manage to face plant tonight I really don't want to look like a fool in front of Paul.
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