Finally knew how to put multiple exclamations :)

Everything Goes

"WE'RE GONNA HAVE SHIT EVEN WORSE THAN BEFORE! YUUJI, WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THAT SCORE!?" Akihisa screamed, a squad-full of very angry F-Class students behind his back, presumably to have Rep—no, Sakamoto executed by probably carton knives and heavyweight tables.

"YOU FUCKING, SCUMBAG, MANIPULATIVE SACK OF SHIT‼!" Shina had definitely lost her sense of restraint in profanity. She literally screamed all these words in front of so many A-Class students and the single adult in this room.

But I was not giving a damn shred of care anymore, I'm not glad nor am I very mad. I just don't care.

Continuously massaging my head, allowing myself to look very, very disdained and very pissed off that warned of anybody to not disturb me lest they wish to get hurt. Amidst my personal feelings of bitter loss, I listened in on all that was happening amidst the screaming of the defeated class—my class:

"WE FUCKING LOST, YUUJI! AND ITS ALL BECAUSE YOU MADE ME SIT OUT THE FIGHT! HOW!? JUST HOW COULD YOU EVEN FUCK UP A FUCKING ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEST!?" Shina's angered screaming stood out the most amongst the sounds of displeasure of my classmates. Cannot say I blame her, she completely placed all her trust on Sakamoto and to see him fail that trust was the most unspeakable thing to happen.

Do I feel the same?

"Kill me." Rep—Sakamoto absolutely had nothing to say.

"….Glad you're prepared! I'm gonna fucking kill you so you better clench your teeth…!" I can hear Yoshii Akihisa's growls, it sounded completely inhuman by his rage and it was quite unsettling to hear, had to admit.

"Yoshii-kun! Please calm down!" I hear Himeji's voice exclaim, it sounded strained, she was probably trying to hold down the enraged idiot from performing a proper execution, but I dared not to find out for myself. I hate to open my eyes to see how she was doing it, I was still irritated, frustrated, and most probably I would definitely snap if I do not hold down my anger.

This loss had a heavy blow on something in me. And I don't know what it is.

I almost seem to not care about it, I really wanted to punch Rep—(damn it!) Sakamoto's face.

The idiot continued screaming his nonsense, "This idiot scored fifty-three! If he scored zero, maybe it was because he forgot to write his name! But a score like this..."

"I gave it all I got." Somehow I managed to hear Sakamoto's pathetic defense amidst the commotion of my classmates.

"You dimwit….!"

"Aki, I don't think you'd even be able to score a 30!" I began to hear Shimada's voice, a firm and critical tone in her voice, sounding unaffected by the defeat of her class.

"I can't deny that." There came Yoshii's reply.

"Then you have no right to blame Sakamoto!"

I could imagine his raging face coming to a point where it cannot be held down. "GAH! WHY ARE YOU BOTH TRYING TO STOP ME!? THIS GUY NEEDS TO BE CORPORALLY PUNISHED WITH A SLIT THROAT!"

Himeji's voice was raised here, "That's not corporal punishment, that's an execution!"

Fuck it.

I clawed on my face downwards. I can no longer keep the emotionless mask on, and my self-control just snapped just by hearing all these bullshit.

It needs to stop!

I faced Akihisa with the hardest glare I could ever create.

"SSHHUT THE FUCK UP, YOSHII AKIHISA!‼"

Everyone unsurprisingly snapped their attention to me, surprise, confusion and overall fear in their faces. The silence slowly settled, but thanks to everything that happened….

….I was very pissed.

"WE LOST, WE GET THAT! WHAT DO YOU THINK MIGHT HAPPEN IF YOU THREW HIS FUCKING CORPSE OUT THE WINDOW, HUH!? {WALA!} EVERYONE'S AS PISSED AS YOU, YOU'RE NOT ONLY ONE WHO LOST‼!"

I'm not sure if my voice was even a scream or a growl, or even understandable, but I don't want to know, I don't care if he even understood my words. I just wanted everyone to just shut up. We just lost the war, my trust was wasted, and Meiko is saved from going to the dump, I had to swallow that fact.

But I wasn't done yet.

"YOU'RE A FUCKING PUNISHMENT INSPECTOR, YOSHII AKIHISA! YOU'RE GRADES DON'T DO JACK SHIT AND YOU SUCK DICK BEING LEFT HANDED! YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO SPOUT YOUR BULLSHIT EITHER! YOU CAN'T EVEN GET THAT FUCKING QUESTION RIGHT OR EVEN GET A SCORE HIGHER THAN 53 SO SHUT IT‼!"

I just realized that my voice had an echo in this massive classroom—it is now impossible that everyone in this very room had not heard me. Everyone was silent, absolutely silent as if my words completely destroyed all of their chances to speak, which was something I wanted and intended to let happen.

And this wasn't the first time I yelled a fit like this and not the first to hear the silence. Being angry gets people a little open-minded, but sometimes I get very open-minded that I ramble to the point where it hurts, bad.

But I don't care, I neither cared how they think of me, or how they see me, even if they were my classmates. I just don't care.

I need to get out of this classroom.

I need a place to sit, just anywhere.

I'm fucking tired.

I found an empty table, completely isolated from students, a good place to sit down and to think my thoughts together. Walking towards it, ignoring the stares of everyone on me and the ones who were in the way that tried to avoid me, I sat down on the edge, my back against the commotion behind me, I continued to rack my head with my fingers, trying to get all these frustrations out.

I needed an outlet.

The pause of silence that I caused was very long, or maybe my anger was just processing the world time a little too fast that it seemed like everything was moving in slow-motion. But I was starting to feel the tense silence of this room.

"Because of your loss, Yuuji. We're gonna have cardboard boxes and have our tables taken away!" I heard Akihisa ranting again, managing to recover from my words, though his voice is in a lower volume than before.

"Why did they take our tables when they didn't need it?" Himeji questioned, her voice matching his.

"To rub salt in the wound." I recognized Hideyoshi's dialect as he answered her.

"Huh?"

"They're JERKS, THAT'S WHAT‼!" Shina's clarification came out as a scream, filling the silence with her fire-induced voice. She wasn't in the least affected by my screaming, probably because she and I share the same feeling of being pissed at our loss. But she was more expressive and she was directing them at the real cause of our loss. "YUUJI, YOU SAID THAT YOU COULD HANDLE THIS FUCKING WAR! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THE POINT OF THAT WHEN YOU COULDN'T EVEN SCORE A 100!?" I clamped my ears as tightly as I could so I could resist Shina's loud exclamation from entering my head.

I didn't think about throwing a fit at her, I was too tired to care. The last thing I want is a motherfucking headache.

"Shina-chan, please calm down." I started hearing Himeji's voice, clearly making an attempt at calming my very irate friend.

"Calm down? How can I calm down!?" Apparently, she had no intention of calming down. I definitely heard Himeji squeak and had probably blanched because Shina apparently didn't control the volume of her voice when she replied the girl. "We lost our fucking chances of winning because your dumbass Representative here had me and Rino sit the fight out! I'm from Nanokawa Academy for fuck's sake, I'm typically smarter than most of these nerds!"

I unconsciously stiffened from her words, what she said had definitely struck a nerve from somebody here. Among the A-Class students, I only know Kinoshita Yuuko to react. How does Shina even know that? What if she's wrong?

"Shina-san, please don't curse so loudly….." Himeji's words came out a whimper, almost unable to hear from my distance. She most probably tensed from the blonde's curses.

"Why!?" She shouted. "Why shouldn't I!? How could I not!? How could I not curse when Yuuji here wasted your victory!? Don't you hate it too, Mizuki!?" Shina still continued to talk in a very high volume, but it was a little mild, most probably to not agitate Himeji.

"I know we lost but….but we can't just blame Sakamoto-kun. He did his best."

"HIS 'BEST'!?" Shina definitely screamed that, a rising pitch of incredulousness found in her tone. "Mizuki, that was a fucking elementary test exam, do you consider 55 points a best!?"

"I've never thought there'd be an ambush." Sakamoto butted in, adding his defense with a voice still even.

"THE FUCK KIND OF AMBUSH ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?" I noticed that Shina's voice is getting louder every time she opens her mouth regarding him.

"WE LOST BECAUSE OF THAT PUNY BRAIN OF YOURS!" The idiot voice has more irritation than volume.

"I SHOULDN'T HAVE LISTENED TO YOUR BULLSHIT ABOUT OUR CLASS LOOKING BAD IF I FIGHT THAT FUCKING FIGHT‼! OUR ALREADY SHITTY REPUTATION JUST GOT EVEN MORE SHITTIER‼!"

"hrrrgghhh" I couldn't stand her screaming voice anymore, I simply looked away from her and covered my one ear that was facing towards her.

"….Yuuji." A feminine voice entered, the voice low, monotonous and was very even, as if my screaming had not affected her. Most definitely Kirishima Shouko, most probably her. I removed my head from my hands and I faced the commotion: Yuuji was sitting on the floor in poorly hidden shame, his eyes were closed. Shina stood over him, her entire face, especially the eyes, were supremely red from a screaming fit, Akihisa was nearby the redhead along with Shimada and Himeji, his face was passive as he faced the valedictorian beauty. "….That was close. If you had not disregarded its difficulty just because it was an elementary leveled test, I would have lost to you." She lowly commented.

"I have no excuses." Sakamoto replied, his eyes remaining closed.

"….By the way, our promise..." She began, putting up a finger.

"I know, just tell me what you want." Yuuji replied, his voice never changing its calm disposition and his eyes never opening yet.

I shifted on my seat (table), turning my form around so my front faced the two class representatives, listening intently and paid complete attention to Kirishima's demand, just what does she want from us?

Kirishima Shouko had popularity, riches, and good conduct. She could have anything she ever wanted. Just what is it that she wants so much that she had to declare an Exam Summoning Battle just to claim it.

She placed her glances at Shina, then at Himeji, then back at him. She took a small breath and opened her mouth….

"….Yuuji, go out with me."

….….….….….….

…..

"….What?" I accidently let out what was on my mind.

Wait, what did she want?

It was at this moment did he open his eyes and look back at her. "I just knew it. Can't you give up already?"

"….I will never give up. I have always liked you."

Sakamoto knew? Wait….What? Huh?

So the one demand Kirishima wanted was to have Sakamoto Yuuji as a lover? I still don't know what the hell's going on. Too sudden, I can't process it all at once.

"I've rejected you a thousand times already, don't you wanna date somebody else?"

"….I only have you in my heart, Yuuji. It can only be you, nobody else can. And that will not change."

The cold, beautiful, smart, rich, unsociable valedictorian of A-Class, who had rejected so many suitors before, loved the Class Representative of F-Class? And she took advantage of the win condition just to force this relationship on him? What could the violent, manipulative, strategic-thinking, con-man Rep of F-Class have done to capture the heart of Kirishima Shouko?

"Where is my right to reject?"

"….None. A promise is a promise, you and I will have a date, now." She demanded, her bland voice had evident firmness.

"Hold on a mi—"

I didn't know what on earth had she done, but she had potentially knocked out the F-Class rep.

And now I watched my Rep get dragged to the door by his 'girlfriend' I might remark how comical it looked, Kirishima Shouko's form was very slim and she was short to Sakamoto's shoulder (I think) yet she managed to haul her well-built, and obviously muscle-heavy 'boyfriend' to the door by the collar of his blazer.

The door closed.

Everyone was very, very silent. Because of the sudden confession, the sudden revelation, and the sudden kidnapping, nobody knows well how to react on everything that just happened seconds ago.

"Serves that asshole right."

And Shina had to break it.

Sigh. My body suddenly felt heavy and my eyes drooped. My exhaustion is finally catching up now that my emotions are spent, cannot believe I haven't felt it until Sakamoto was gone. Was I held up by my own anger and interest until now?

I need to go home. I need a drink.

"Alright, F-Class. Time for games are over." A familiar deep voice boomed out, drawing all the remaining F-Class's attention to it. I stood up to see who it was and I saw Sir Nishimura's towering form among the forest of heads, glowering down on us with his ominous smirk and crossed arms.

"Huh? Nishimura-sensei, do you have some business with us?" One of my classmates asked.

"Yes, I thought I'd share about our supplementary studies with my F-Class."

…..I have a bad feeling about this.

"Congrats! Because you lost the war, the homeroom teacher changed from Fukuhara-sensei to me. This year, you guys have the chance to study like mad."

"WHAAAT!?" I think only the men of my class only yelled; Shimada, Himeji and Shina had definitely never faced punishment or lessons from him before so they have no clue what to expect.

Sir Nishimura as my homeroom teacher? I certainly would not mind but if there was one thing I feared about him, is that his teaching methods go over the top. If he was our homeroom teacher, am I going to suffer the fate of being in the simulation of a military school, every school day, for the entire school year? Is this the price of losing? Is that it?

Well, at least it is better than the old one. I can't stand that man's voice anyway.

Well, I will just have to adapt to that. I faced worse than adults.

"Listen up, you guys performed very well in this war. To tell you the truth, I never expected Class F to achieve so much. However, even if 'result doesn't mean everything,' it is still a powerful weapon in your life. Even if result is not the most important thing in life, it doesn't mean we should not put effort into it!"

And he comes here spouting some motivational bullshit. I don't have time for that, just let me go home.

He glowered at Yoshii Akihisa with a devilish smirk that I knew was better reserved for the most troublesome student about to be apprehended. "Yoshii, I will give special supervision to you and Sakamoto, because both of you are the first ever 'Kansatsu Shobunsha' and A-class war criminals for this school."

"That won't happen! I'll slip past those eyes and have fun at school like I've always been!" Yoshii Akihisa exclaimed, as if he was defending himself against the charges said against him in a courtroom.

"Do you even have sense of penitence?" Sir sighed.

I'm starting to get that Yoshii Akihisa was another one of the meddlesome students and Sir was his usual apprehender. And by the way he spoke of him and his crimes, I wonder how long did it go on, and how was he not expelled?

"Anyway from tomorrow onwards, besides the normal lessons, I will give all of you an extra two-hour after-school lecture." Sir added.

Fucking hell….

A biased treatment specifically for F-Class, why am I not surprised? If it goes on like this then Meiko will have to wait for 2 fucking hours before we are allowed out.

I looked over to Shina who was jogging over to me, her face was composed but the evidence of recent rage were still lingering for her parents to see when she gets home, especially in the eyes. "Should I worry about the muscles here?" She asked me, throbbing a thumb at the muscular teacher over her shoulder.

I spared a glance at him, trying to imagine the times that would come while he was the new advisor of F-Class, which I cannot, before I answered, "….Just do not lose a summoning battle and do not call his attention by causing trouble."

She raised an eyebrow at me, "That's it?"

I nodded. "….Otherwise you will be taken for a lecture similar to a military school's methods, regardless of both crimes."

She looked over her shoulder, staring at Sir. No…. I think she was looking over at everyone. If my logic was still good, she might be thinking about the changes our class had just gotten.

She looked back at me, shifting her weight to one foot and asked, "….Are you gonna be fine with this?" She tilted her head, lowering down her glasses so she could look at me without them. "I mean, THIS. We lost and got downgraded."

I never thought of it but her grey eyes, despite how red her scleras were, looked very charming up close without glasses.

Her question though, am I fine with this? Losing, our equipment being downgraded, having our reputation rotten even further….and have Meiko remain in this classroom?

I still don't know how to feel for it.

Like I said, I'm tired to even think.

I sighed through my nose, completely having no answer for it. I shook my head, patted her shoulder as a silent goodbye and began to walking for the door. I will go back to the classroom, get my bag, get back in here to pick up Meiko and go home.

I need a drink of wine, and smoke some vape before bedtime. Strawberry sounds like a good idea for the night.

"Hey, take me to have crepes now!"

"G-Go to the movies with me!"

"No, no, no! My living expenses! My nutrition!"

The door closed.

Huh…..

Just now, I happened to see Yoshii Akihisa being hauled out of A-Class's doors by Shimada's arm around his neck, Himeji holding his arm and pulling, it looked painful, his face looked so desperate utterly pained.

And he was gone, I then realized that he suffered the same fate as Sakamoto Yuuji.

Hmph, Funny. That's a little relieving for me.

A very large, tanned hand landed on my right shoulder, I was too tired to be surprised, and my body did not budge an inch. I looked over and saw that it was Sir Nishimura, he was looking at me with a smile, nowhere malicious as the one he gave to Akihisa, but a warm one.

"Looks like I'm your advisor, now, Shimuya."

I sighed and nodded. I looked back at the entrance where both Sakamoto and Yoshii were kidnapped to. I paid attention to what he said seconds ago, and my deduction was that the two were his usual targets for disciplining. I wonder how Sakamoto would react if he hears of this in the morning.

Wait, why do I even care about that?

"You guys nearly won," He commented, I nodded again in agreement, trying not to feel the damn frustration of our loss. "But if Sakamoto had just studied you would have made history in this school." He added. I nodded again, unsure how to feel if we should even change history.

NO, it was either me or her, and Sakamoto let it happen to be her. He brought this on us, got what he deserved, and is Not My Problem.

…..

…..not my problem…..

I clicked my tongue with my mouth closed, I said that I don't care so I'll stick by that.

I moved my right hand, trying to reach behind him and I patted his rock-hard back with a half-cupped hand instead of a spread hand, the latter kind of patting would sting the person. But would pain even apply for a literally hardened man like Sir Nishimura?

Sigh, no more questions. I. Need. To. Get. Out.

"….Now, I will see you tomorrow morning." I said in a visibly lethargic voice, letting his hand on my shoulder slip off as I began walking for the door and opening it. But before I turned the corner and head down the hallway for my classroom, I looked over my shoulder to face him, letting myself indulge in just one scripted line, just for Japanese standard's sake, "I look forward to be working with you." I disregarded bowing, I was too tired to do it.

"Likewise. Be careful on your way home."

Hmmm, even he says such things.

~~~~~ « ҉» ~~~~~

I am breaking the usual now.

I initiated the embrace this time the sooner I closed the door of my home: I lifted Meiko from the ground by her underarms and held her close to me like a child, my hand around back and the other on her rear so she wouldn't fall or slip off. Though my movements were sagged, tired and horribly slow, include the fact that my leg still has not fully healed, I forced myself to move towards the couch.

She hugged me back with a passionate one, visibly trying to make it feel heartfelt, her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist, just what I needed. She knows I was bitter, and her concerns are over the top now.

She shifted in my grasp to feel comfortable until she was and I held her even tighter, not wanting her to slip.

I needed comfort: my class lost a fight and my rep brought shame to it. Even if I expected the loss, it still affected me somewhere deep. Somewhere that was private, unseen, something that I didn't want to notice. But I don't know what it was.

I walked over to the couch again and this time, I didn't turn on the lights. I keep my eyes buried in her shoulder—I walked in blind. I owned this house and I know its passages like my room that I could just live in this house blindfolded, finding the couch is as simple as taking two steps forward.

When I was at the area where the couch would be behind me, I leaned back and I hit the soft surface. I won this blindfold walk. I continued to bury my eyes to her shoulder as she held me close. I was still angry, irritated, and horribly depressed. I don't know why the last one was there but I do. I needed comfort dreadfully, and I was close to breaking. My eyes threatened to tear, and my teeth gritted. I was confused as well: why do I feel like crying, why it feels personal and why was I angry even when I wanted my class to lose.

….….

No, it wasn't anger, it was bitterness. I was feeling bitterness.

But for what? What am I bitter for? My class's defeat? My betrayed trust?

I wasn't bitter for the defeat. I had accepted it. For my classes defeat, Meiko will not be residing in the dusty F-Class. But I still feel it, it was familiar and equally painful. It was recognizable as well, similar to the feeling I receive whenever I would go out of my way for someone, to reduce myself just for the convenience of others, and not having anything to receive in return.

Was I feeling the bitterness of sacrifice?

That can't be. What did I sacrifice? I barely done anything in that war. Just why do I feel bitter? Why?

….….….….

It's hopeless. I might never know, it's probably better to just forget about them and then I'll be okay.

Just as I taught her, Meiko had felt my anger from the touch and she did what she could to console me, she kept one arm wrapped around my neck while her other stroked my head and I could feel her breath on my hair—she was kissing my head. Occasionally she would rock my head side to side or rub her cheek against my temple constantly. I could hear syllables.

She was speaking to me.

Meiko was mute, but it doesn't mean she cannot speak. She only had a lost voice, not a lost vocabulary. I cannot verify what she was saying, but a gut feeling told me that she was singing me sweet comforting words. That might be my bitterness manipulating my thoughts but I don't want to continue second guessing everything I feel.

Her touch was effective. It was soothing, so touching that my mind was becoming blank just by her tender consolation. Our roles have reversed, it seemed, she will be the one comforting me this time.

I huffed a little in amusement, but I like to experience how it feels like to be consoled by my little sister who was always consoled.

It took a long time, probably one hour. I remained in her arms, and her touch never stopped, even her emotional energies makes me cry. I could feel the warmth slowly setting in, I don't feel sad or angry anymore, just the feeling of being hollow.

That means I needed an emotion to be in me if I wanted to come back.

Drawing back from her shoulder, I wiped the dampness of my eyes, and I locked my bangs behind my ears, letting my eyes be free to a look out like an opened camera lens. I looked back into my sister's eyes, due to the darkness of the house I could barely make out the dark pupils that stared back at me, but even so, the smile she had shined the most. I felt really warm inside, and the urge to kiss her was acting up again. Why does this feeling keep happening, and why does Meiko looked so beautiful whenever it's dark?

I drew my face close, foreheads touching and my heartbeat, even if steady, was practically as strong as a bass drum that I felt it pounding my chest.

….Could this be it?

I drew my lips….

….

….and I pecked the corner of her lips.

That's not happening today, I guess. But I didn't stop there; I gave her lots of them. I kept kissing her, from the corner of her lip towards her temple until the forehead, I hugged her one more time. In her enveloped state, she tried to kiss my cheek, but only ending on my ear so she settled to kiss the crook of my neck. It was causing a tickle and the back of my midsection was stiffening out of reflex, I reacted by tightening my hold on her, which caused my arms to shake from the tension. She tried to do the same, crushing me with her legs on my waist and trying to cause a tremble, which she can't in her position. I then found out that we were competing on who hugs who tighter.

When I thought it was time to stop, I stood up, carrying her clutching form with me. I placed both my hands under her arms, she released her clutch on me, realizing what I was about to do. I lifted her high in the air like the child-shaped teen she was. She spread her arms wide like she was in flight. As she looked up she tried to reach one of the rafters of the ceilings (still needing extra layers) but couldn't for the 50 centimeters distance up.

Back before, she was so small, and her growth hormones didn't do their job of making her mature, and today she still appeared child-like.

And I still think of her like one, especially when I lift her up like this; she used to ask me for a lift whenever she could when she was a little 10 year old youngster, because of her my arm muscles grew in sturdiness and in strength. But as time passed, she outgrew the habit but it doesn't mean I'm gonna stop.

As I placed her down, she took my hand and led me up the stairs. Midway she let go, began undressing her blazer and neatly folded it and tucked it in her arm. As I flipped the switch and the lights came on (thankfully I have my bangs on), she already had her tie removed and she is already unbuttoning her long sleeve, buttoned, white shirt. I looked away for her modesty. I had already seen her naked several times, but fortunately I am a person who respected other people's modesty.

As we did the usual: undress, bath, dress, turn on the TV (Markiplier Time) and ready dinner. But I have a different thought for dinner tonight: PIZZA.

Yes, some delicious pizza will do for today and for Meiko's win. It's celebration time. I have so many thousands of yen so I can cover the costs. I am not as celebratory as anybody would think of me but this occasion was a better excuse for me (and her) to eat pizza.

Reaching the phone, I called the pizza place. Some Hawaiian pizza will be good, had to tell them no spicy ketchups. They tend to be the first thing to be found along with the pizza instead of the other way around.

Do Japanese people prefer hot sauce over ketchup so casually that it suddenly became a default option for Pizza places?

◊This is Saucy-nee's Pizza, may I take your order?◊ A female's voice asked.

"….Yes, 2 large Hawaiian Pizzas please, no spicy sauce if you would, just simple tomato sauce."

◊Okay, anything else, sir?◊

"….Nnno. Nothing else."

◊Okay, repeating your order: 2 Hawaiian Pizzas with ketchup?◊

I hear her voice every time, and it never changes. It was like she was being robotic, "….Correct."

◊Would you like to add some beverages, sir?◊

Drinks? Hmm, why not? I'm well-aware that a week has not passed before I allow myself to drink spiky drinks again, but this wasn't the first time I have broken my own rules.

"….Sure, just two 350ml cokes. In a can, if you have them. That's it."

After telling her my address and her saying it will be served at 20 minutes or more, I placed the phone into my pockets and sat down watching some Markiplier Outlast 2 playthrough. When this is through I am switching to Killing Floor: One-Legged Markiplier. One of my favorites.

I sat down at the side of the couch, beside the armrest. Meiko, who apparently had been waiting for me by the other side of the couch, scooted over to me, laying her back on my lap and placed her head on the armrest, eyes on the TV and remote in hand. I placed one hand on her belly, kneading what remains of the fat she tried to banish. She 'giggled' from my touch, grabbing my hand, bringing it to her lips and giving it a kiss before interlocking fingers, a way of keeping it from doing anything else.

I rested my elbow to the armrest and resting my cheek to my palm, only to notice that Meiko had switched the video to Killing Floor: One-Legged Markiplier.

The hell?

I looked down on Meiko with an expressed sign of shock on my face. She does not seem to notice my shock, or was she pretending she had not. Did she just follow my thoughts? I know that understanding each other's thoughts is natural to happen between people who live together but isn't this a little too scary, even if it's her?

+GIMME BACK MY GODDAMN LEG!+

Markiplier's dismayed voice rang at the screen, drawing my full attention to it.

If she had predicted my preferences that well, I just hope she doesn't become the next Shimuya Rino and started committing murder.

~~~~~ « ҉» ~~~~~

Bringing the glass to my lips, tasting the fruity taste of the wine before swallowing, I brought the drip tip to my lips, pressing the activation button with my thumb and I sucked some strawberry-tasting vapor to my lungs before I blew out the contents, watching the white vapor spread out in front of my face, trying to form a swirly picture before the taste of strawberry that lingered behind my tongue faded along with the vapor.

3….

I, myself had no idea how to feel for this kind of habit, but sometimes I think that I was better than most teenagers. Most teenagers ruin their bodies with drugs and alcohol. I would never do such a thing.

There is absolutely no way I would be like any 'Normal' teenagers. 'Normal' teenagers in this time were all about sex, accidental pregnancy, cutting class, drug, alcohol, smoking, and leading a destructive life towards the harsh future.

Rather I would be part of the teens who would involve themselves in Facebook, DOTA, basketball, and games. In this category, it is way milder. I would not hesitate to be one of them.

Though I never played DOTA, or basketball before, my Facebook account has been abandoned for years since I graduated from elementary.

I was raised to hate smoking tobacco forever (and I swear to that towards my grave), I especially despised Takahide's smoking habit, he has a daughter and I don't want him to die of cancer and leave her alone in the world. I hated alcohol just as much, they tasted horrible, and it causes accidents. My male cousins consume all of these 2 things, and I hate it about them. They made everything worse when most of them began taking drugs, I practically disown them now. The last thing I ever remembered from them were multiple bruises, black eyes and bleeding mouths. Their father's and I were not very happy. As if they could ask me to keep it a secret. My hands itch whenever I try to replay that one line, my fury rekindled every time I think of the 'invitation' they gave me before.

Drinking a little more of the wine and a smoke of strawberry, I tried to blow out the smoke ring trick.

I failed. Just another series of white swirls.

4…..

I had my ways to be healthy: I think of wine as some sort of grape juice. Plus, my relatives say it is way healthier—it cleans my system and it is good for the heart. But I tend to be very choosy of my wine, I only pick the ones that were delicious to the tongue (grape mainly, they taste better than apple) and just as healthy.

I tend to question just how other people could drink alcohol and not lose the contents of their stomachs. The last time I tried sampling Red Horse Beer (shittiest liquid I ever drank in my country) because of my cousin's persuasions, I ended up having to gargle Sprite and Coke to get its disgusting taste out of my mouth.

I drank some more wine, the dark violet of the liquid halfway finished and smoked a little more of the strawberry, the vapor smoke was slightly a little less obvious.

5….

Smoking vape though, I am still under the skepticism of its 'safe' factor. One of my more….healthier cousins, Erwin was the one to introduce me to the product. The first flavor I had from him was vanilla (the taste was so damn familiar to some powder candy I long have not eaten for a while) and I sort of coughed on the first whiff, just like a person new to cigarettes. His vape pen was almost cigar-like, and he sure had a nice collection of flavors. Even the ones I have are from him, he also gave me a simple looking vape pen as my 14th birthday gift, and I still use it. He shared the same outlook of cigarettes as me, just a "piece of shit product that should have costed 10 pesos per stick". I think of vaping as the 'safer side of smoking' but I think of the product as a car: just drive carefully and you will be fine.

In my case, it is 10 whiffs per week. Just to be safe. My little sister however hates it when I vape. I cannot blame her, she doesn't even believe in the 'safe factor', but I promised that I will not turn to the habit every day. Only once a week.

I drank some wine with a little more than the preferred amount and smoked a little vapor again.

6….

Right now, it is most probably 9 in the evening. I just have to finish my drink and smoke the 10th vapor then retire for the night. I am currently sat at the tiled roof of my house, the sturdiness of each tile holding up my weight well, comparing me to a small rock on a tin roof.

Uncle sure knew how to choose the best roof, I wager that 24 people can stand at the spot and not cause a crack. I accessed the roof by the balcony. Anyone can access the roof anytime, one just needs 3 simple things: pull up grip, good jump height and courage.

As the balcony is not covered from the rain, the roof is accessible the sooner you enter the place. Either you enter with a chair or your own jumping ability, it is one's preference to go about it. First, you latch on to the edge of the rooftop, then pull yourself up until you land your knee against the tiles (the roof is flat-surfaced near the edges so that is one thing less to worry about) and then you are free to feel lax and stare at the stars.

Placing my drink at the roof before climbing up was a BITCH to do. But it was not the first time I broke a drinking glass so complaining is not allowed anymore.

7….

I belched, the taste of the pizza mixing with the strawberry in my tongue.

Oh cool, the vapor came out with it as well.

What happened today sure was big. It was very fast if I include the first day: on the first day I was sent to the shittiest classroom I ever entered, I suddenly met a Class Rep with intriguing hair and eye color that did not actually say anything about my appearance but rather referenced my achievements from last year, which was something I wanted to hear for a long time.

My relatives were (practically) never there to listen to my stories, it was just my sister to be there for me. Just once, I wanted to tell my achievements to someone other than my sister. Hearing it from somebody who I just met was quite the treat.

Then after the start of class, I have made a friend. I was not the easy man to approach because of 4 years ago, anyone who later knew about my personality later began distancing themselves from me, which was something I was fine about. A behavior like mine cannot attract friendship. But Shina did not repulse at my behavior, she was rather compatible with my temper. It was quite new, and at the same time, very nostalgic as well: to be able to be yourself without the other complaining—despite what personality you had. I never remembered how it felt to have a friend till now, and to think that she had seen what was bad about me and still not distance herself away from me after that fight was definitely something I most appreciated of her.

I was very glad to have her as my friend.

My very first war though, it was so memorable, it felt like I was actually fighting for my life. I guess I was enjoying myself too much. I may have taken it too seriously but I was living my dream so it cannot be helped. It felt like I was the best fighter among all of my opponents, my familiar fought according to my command and it beats most fighting VR games out there.

My familiar was a hack-and-slash type of beast, but I settled to the grappling type, my favorite fighting stance. Instead of finishing off the D-Class opponents like my familiar would with a score bypassing 400, I settled to making the battle a little longer and enjoy every moment it gives. And my goodness, my familiar was a savage when he fought (even though I was controlling his movements), he strangled, mutilated, stabbed, any known method I know that included shredding my opponent apart with claws, my familiar utilized them to the most brutal extent, all with a sadistic smile in his face that borderlined glee.

The D-Class squad consisting of 7 never stood a chance against me. I and my familiar relished every moment. Oh man, I want to fight even more.

The third day though….

8….

What happened today ensured that we cannot declare anymore wars for the next 3 months. The next one would probably be at August. That was what one of the rules said, but my class is still subject to being declared war at by other classes so it is possible that there will be a chance to fight again. But who would rather declare war with F-Class, to the other classes we are just a waste of time if they considered fighting us.

But if they did have half the brain to even declare on the weakest class, they are in for a surprise. Then Rep will have me, Shina and Himeji—

….

Oy…

I brought the glass to my lips, drinking what was left of the wine, leaving aside my vape pen.

Just why the hell did I began mentioning her out of all people?

Why did I even bother having to rely on Sakamoto for my fights? I could deal with my own fights. He may be witty and a Class Rep at that but he is both dead to me and my familiar.

He ruined my impression of him, he was cocky, overconfident and, most of all, an idiot. 53 on an elementary school test? He seriously thought it was easy because it was something from his grade 6. If it was me, I would not have taken the test lightly.

The test was a fucking Japanese history test, completely testing a student's memorization. Did he seriously think he could remember such details that he learned from his younghood? He said that the 'one question' was all he needed to win, and he just loses by a large margin to his childhood friend.

Well, Shina said it: serves that asshole right.

I just hope Kirishima Shouko could at least give him a hard time. Judging from the fact that he was completely unwilling to court her, being with her was already the progressing punishment for him.

I should expect a downgrading of the facilities of my class. Sigh. Yoshii Akihisa had said that our chabudais will be replaced with cardboard boxes.

That sucks.

Besides the state of the classroom brought by our defeat, what is going to happen from now on until the 3-month ban has been lifted from us? Is it just going to continue like any other school day? Like last year? Just study, eat your lunch, study again, then go home, then repeat?

Maybe so. But last year, from what I have seen, all the second years and third years got into events involving summoned beasts and there are still other curricular activities ready for us. So, it might be eventful. But I have no idea when exactly or is it even guaranteed yet, I will have to find means where my second year high school life would be worth remembering.

But such concerns will have to wait for a while, there is still some bullshit I needed to settle.

Especially Himeji.

9….

Lastly, I feel embarrassed, very embarrassed.

It was a common aftereffect occurring after a few hours or minutes of snapping in rage. Reasons vary and they were not hard to find out what. This time I feel ashamed because I displayed something unmanly in front of so many people. I may be short-tempered but I also feel shame. I acted like the worst sore loser in front of the winning class, I cursed in front of Ma'am Takahashi, I showed more bitterness than most of my classmates, and it hit me hard when I remembered that Shina was there to see it.

These feelings usually go away after one day, and I hope it does.

And while I wait for 3 months until the next chance for our class to declare war, I expect everything to change. I am certain that it will; I made a friend, I found people to serve and follow (especially if I was currently pissed at them), I reprimanded a classmate (I never done that before), and I began talking to other people without any sense of disregard.

If things are settling to change my usual day, I anticipate what kind of person I would become.

10….

Finally sucking my last strawberry vapor and holding it in, I picked up my glass, stood up and walked over to the edge of the roof without slipping off the slanted roof I am at, the moonlight makes it easy for me to navigate. When I reached the part of the roof just above the balcony, I casually walked off the edge and fell straight down. With my limping leg in mind, I made my landing on the brown, spray-painted wood as silent as a ghost but with just the faint sound of a slap of my one good feet, my other never touching the earth until necessary.

Then I blew the vapors out I held in a waving pattern, trying to entertain myself by doing the imposing entrance of a horrible monster. Smoke, landing from the air, and a scary appearance? Perfect factors.

Opening the door, I was met with complete blackness of the hallway once again.

Hello darkness, my old friend.

The interior of the house had all its lights out, Meiko had probably slept by now. I just need to go to the kitchen, drink lots of healthy clean water to make the wine and coke in my system not give its negative effects on my body, then go back to my room.

Opening my overstuffed fridge, I beheld clusters of meat and vegetables filling in the spaces, Uncle's vacation with his recruits left too many leftovers, all these are going to last me and Meiko a month of living. Facing the shelves behind the door, I grabbed the 1 liter plastic water bottle (which was actually a Coca Cola bottle) at the bottom of the shelf and filled my wine glass before bringing it up to my lips and tilting my head back to make the gravity do its work of making the liquid slide down my throat faster.

Downing the last of it, adding more content to my belly that consisted of peperoni, pineapples, and other meat ingredients from the pizza and the coke in it, I placed the bottle back at the door shelf, took out my toothbrush and the toothpaste for a little dental cleaning.

I have no evidence if wine and vape would leave bad breath just like smoke and alcohol but I am not going to take chances.

Once I was through, I placed my toothbrush back to the fridge, closed it, and began washing the glass by the sink. I skipped soaping it and just settled to rinsing it with water, just to be quick. When I was through, I placed the glass to the cupboards, shut off the lights and head for my room, relying on muscle memory to go up the stairs through the darkness.

Flicking the lights of my room on, I was surprised to see Meiko lying on my covers, her phone in hand and earphones plugged in her ears, a video of a Turbo Dismount; Markiplier edition episode still playing in the screen.

And she was asleep.

She was definitely waiting for me to come over just so she could comfort me some more. But she ate too much Pizza and she got sleepy real quick, she most probably tried to stay up by watching some of the videos she copied from the hard drive via laptop, but failed.

I shook my head in amusement, my bunso tends to go for such limits just to comfort me, but it was the thought that counts. So her gesture was sweet and heartfelt.

I walked over to my desk and pulled out the box for the vape pen from one of the drawers to the right. I began to disassemble the piece and place them to the respective places in the box until it practically looked like pieces of scraps.

Through with my work, I placed the box back to its rightful place, I locked the door, shut off the lights and everything was dark once again. But I kept a picture on my brain of the last image of a lit room so I can venture through without hitting my toe on some furniture.

Or the light of Meiko's phone still playing the video was a good source of light, considering that the brightness of the screen was bloody big as it reflected off the silver foam-coated ceiling.

I reached for the phone in her hand, pulling it from her grasp, unplugging her earphones from her ears before placing them on the nearby nightstand, and putting it to sleep mode, darkness overtaking once again.

I felt for the soft fabric of my bed until I found it and I crawled to the excess space beside Meiko before lying down, resting my head on the big pillow that she left unused for me. I do not want to bother telling her to go back to her room, I would like some company for the night though. The loss of the battle was faint in my mind, I need it gone for good.

As soon as my back rested on the covers, it seemed to have awakened Meiko as she began to shift. I hear rustling of fabrics, and I found out that it was Meiko's hand trying to confirm if I was finally here, feeling the surface of the bed. When I felt her warm hand feeling my shoulder, chest, and finally my face, her thumb brushing my lips a little, the same hand snaked its way to my nape and she pulled herself close to me, the other hand tucked in between our chests, hugging me to a cuddle, giving a long, soft kiss to my neck before relaxing away to sleep.

It seemed she was intent on being comfortable instead of being the one doing the effort of comforting me, which I understand because we barely slept together. It was a silent boundary between us; we had to respect the other's personal space.

But her initiating the hold was a first. Maybe she is trying to comfort me in this fashion.

Single-minded till the end now, are we? Okay, I will take it.

I wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her even closer to me, tucking my other hand underneath the pillow my head rested on. Then we lay still, her warm breath, rhythmically blowing in-between my chest and neck, one hand tightly holding the other to a comforting embrace; consciously-subconsciously passing some emotional energies.

These nights. These nights are one of the best evenings I could ask for a good night sleep. Lay a head on the pillow, knowing that someone is there for you in your arms. If Meiko thinks the same way about me, then I will pray for her sweet dreams.

And when tomorrow comes…..

I kissed her forehead and closed my eyes to allow the darkness to dominate my consciousness, the mental exhaustion and the fresh intake of wine mixing well to put me to sleep faster.

….I hope I make peace with my classmates. And hopefully, make all of them my friend.

I swear to that.