Chapter Fifteen – We Need To Talk…

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight (obviously) and no copyright infringement is intended.

We stood there staring after them for some time. So, Tanya had lied to me about James. I was livid, although I know that I had no right at all to be. After all I had embarked on… well, what had I embarked on with Bella, did we even have anything? The thought of James laying a single finger on Bella made my blood boil. I knew that I was not capable of stopping him. If I even tried, he would simply have squashed me like a bug before laughing and claiming what was mine. Bella. Then there was Tanya. She spoke about Bella like she was some cheap whore. I also had just lied to Bella about who Tanya was, I just had to pray that never came back to haunt me. I turned and walked away from Bella. How could I face her? I was not worthy to be near her when I had lied and deceived her. I had feelings that I cannot explain. I wanted to be with her. Then I heard her call out after me, but I continued to walk away. I did all I could to not look back.

"Edward, please wait. I got the feeling that you wanted to talk to me before. Well, before that asshole showed up."

Hearing her voice, I stopped dead in my tracks. Hanging my head in shame, I turned towards her. Closing the distance between us, her hands found my face. Cupping my cheeks,she made me face her. As her eyes sought mine out, I was powerless to resist and found myself staring back into her eyes. I managed to utter a few words that were barely audible,

"Bella, I'm sorry. I should've stopped him…"

She silenced me with a kiss. I just stood there like a fool as her lips grazed mine. Shame flooded through me and I didn't know how to respond. There was nothing sexual about it. Her lips ghosted mine before she pulled back, and tenderly placed her head against my chest. I could feel her breath on my skin, and my head instantly rested on hers. My arms wound their way around her pulling her closer to me, not wanting to let her go. I placed kisses on the top of her head and tears fell down my cheeks. In that moment I felt like a failure. I needed to protect her, keep her safe and yet I failed. It fell to Emmett to rescue her from James. If he had not been there, well, I dread to think what would've happened to her. I just kept muttering the words 'I'm sorry' over and over again into her hair between the kisses. What kind of man was I? What could I seriously offer her?

Nothing, that's what. Who am I really? Yeah, that's right. Edward Cullen, resident school geek. The only thing I have going for me is my grades. I was certainly not a hunk, none of the girls at school showed any interest in me. For fuck's sake, I lost my virginity to my sister's best friend in my parents summerhouse. Then, I managed to sleep with both Bella and Tanya and lie so easily to both of their faces. Yeah, I was a real catch. I pulled myself away from Bella in disgust at my behavior and stalked back towards the main group. Rose was busy shouting at Emmett, while he was nursing his jaw where James' lucky punch managed to land. All of the guys from the team stood around him like he was some kinda hero. They we were talking about how James had it coming and some of them were talking about going after him and finishing the job. Rose broke off from her verbal assault on Emmett and turned to me,

"Edward! There you are! I was so worried that James might have, well you know."

I smiled at my sister. Despite her outward demeanour, she did care about me. I gave her a smile and said.

"Yeah I'm good, thanks. Em, well, he stepped in and James left...with Tanya."

The look on Rose's face was a picture. She went from shock to amazed to confused in the span of a few seconds before she shouted.

"Tanya did what? She knows what a bastard James is. His reputation goes before him and is well earned. She must be crazy, or desperate. I knew she was seeing someone but it didn't work out."

Shit. My heart skipped a beat. Had she said anything? I needed to know,

"Really? He must be crazy to let a girl like that go."

"Yeah, no idea who he is. She was really upset earlier. He just dumped her out of the blue, no explanation, nothing. He better not have been cheating on her, otherwise, he will know pain like no other."

I mentally crossed my legs. There's no way I could risk Rose ever finding out that it was me that Tanya had been seeing. I would definitely be losing parts of my anatomy that I would rather keep. Luckily Rose was still annoyed at Tanya and began frantically pacing up and down the beach.

"So you just let her leave with him? You didn't try to stop her? Oh, never mind. She wouldn't listen to you anyway. What the fuck does she thinks she's doing? Wait until I catch up with her."

She suddenly stopped her tirade, and turned to me, "Where's Bella?"

Good question, where was Bella? I could've sworn that she was right behind me, but then again I didn't really stop to check if she was following me or not. Shit! What if James had doubled back?

"I erm, she…"

"What Edward, c'mon spit it out!" She snapped.

"I'm right here." An angelic voice broke the silence.

I spun around to see Bella. Feeling relieved, I let out a huge sigh. Never had I been so glad to see someone in my entire life.

"Sorry Rose. Hope that I didn't worry you too much. I was right behind Edward, then I needed to be just be by myself, so I slipped away from him."

She smiled, giving me a sly wink, which only I noticed.

"Oh, my brother is so observant at times. Edward, you need to be more careful. James is, well, you saw how he behaved tonight. You can't just leave Bella alone like that. It's obvious that James was planning to-"

Bella interrupted before Rose could finish that particular sentence, and I was glad that she did.

"Rose, I'm fine, honestly. James wouldn't try anything like that again. Especially now he has… Oh sorry, Edward said that you, oh, erm…"

"That we were friends. Well,we were. How she can go off with him like that. I'm furious with her."

I can tell that Rose meant it, too. God help Tanya when Rose catches up with her. Bella started to shiver, obviously because of the implications of what could've been. I've had a few beers tonight and I mentally cursed myself, because there was no way that I could drive her home, Bella must have be reading my mind as she dangled her keys from her index finger and asked,

"Need a ride anywhere?"

Oh, boy. That comment was so heavily loaded that I struggled to answer her. When I looked she had a teasing look on her face. Rose interjected quickly,

"The party looks like it's over anyway, thanks to James' little display. I would like to bet that someone had called the Police."

A look of panic must've crossed my face as Bella just laughed, managing to say,

"Don't worry, Chief Swan is out of town tonight. His deputy is covering, and I think you guys will be safe. Unless, that is you have a supply of donuts down here that he can arrest."

"Woah, wait a moment. Your dad is out of town?" Rose gasped.

"Yep, back tomorrow afternoon, why?"

"You are not going back home alone. I will not hear of it. You are to come and stay with us. I'm sure Mom won't mind since the guest room is always ready."

I am floored by how quickly Rose had taken to Bella, and was now offering to let her stay the night. Hmm, Bella staying the night, in my house sleeping a couple of doors down from me. Focus Edward, focus. Bella smiled sweetly at Rose, and I wondered if she was having similar thoughts to me as she replied.

"I would feel safer if I wasn't at home. I am sure James knows Charlie is away. Are you sure that Esme won't mind?"

The next thing Rose was on the phone to Mom, who of course would not hear of Bella being home alone once Rose had given her the edited highlights of the evening. Then Bella started to walk towards her ancient truck, hopping in the driver seat, grinning at me. We drove to my house in silence, neither one of us wanting to be the first to speak. As we pulled onto the drive,the tension in the air was palpable. I knew that I needed to talk to her to tell her how I felt, but I was still so unsure myself. She shut off the engine, turned to me and opened her mouth to speak, but I couldn't bear to hear the words that I thought she was about to say, so I leaned across and kissed her, hard.

She was a little shocked at first and tried to push me away, but then after a few seconds she relaxed and kissed me back. This kiss soon turned into something soft and gentle. My head started to feel light and I never wanted it to end. I knew deep down that it had to, for I had to tell her how I felt. So I pulled back and looked at her before I dared speak.

"Bella, we need to talk –"

Just as the words left my mouth, the porch light snapped on and my Mom appeared at the front door, waving excitedly to us. I groaned in defeat.

"We'd better go inside. She will only wait in the doorway, or come out if we don't."

Bella nodded silently. Now I knew that she didn't want this, want us. She would've said something to me if she did. Feeling dejected,I trudged across to be greeted by my Mom who ushered us inside. Once there she made hot chocolate and demanded to be brought up to date on what had happened at the party. I edited...heavily.

We stayed there, talking for about an hour before Bella yawned, so my Mom decided that it was time to send us off to bed. She came upstairs and showed Bella around. I would've offered but since we got into the house she had only spoken to me when completely necessary, and hadn't made any eye contact with me. Further proof in my eyes that she didn't want me. I mean, why should she?

I laid on my bed unable to sleep staring at the ceiling in the dark. Like I was gonna find any answers there. Knowing that Bella was a couple of doors down the hall was not helping me sleep. I heard the door open. I couldn't tell who it was so I feigned sleep and turned my back to the door. It was probably just Mom coming to check on me. To my surprise, the side of the bed dipped down. I felt the covers lift and someone slide into the bed next to me. My body knew exactly who this was but my brain was struggling with the information. Her warm body pressed up against my bare back I was grateful that I had forgotten my t-shirt tonight but had remembered my pj trousers, a hand slid around my waist and up my chest, while soft kisses were placed on my shoulders before she placed her head snugly against my back. I could feel her breath on my neck. I didn't know what to say, knowing that all that was separating me from her was the t-shirt that I had loaned her to sleep in. I was frozen to the spot,unable to move when she whispered gently in my ear,

"Edward, I know that you are awake, please?"

I breathed out deeply. There was no way to avoid this. I said that we needed to talk, and we did, but having her body pressed up to me so tightly and her, warm hand on my skin was not helping my brain make any sense of this. She had come to me, made the moves. What did this mean? I turned out of her grasp and faced her. I could see? her face in the moonlight that was coming into the room, she looked amazing.

"Bella, like I said, we need to talk-"

"Edward, don't. I know what you are going to say, and I want to get in there first. You are an amazing person. You clearly don't realize how you make me feel. You appreciate the fact that there is more to me than being the most popular girl in school, the one who all the boys are eager to bed for the kudos. You see beyond the public façade. You have seen the real me and there is more to see, I promise you."

I was looking at her amazed. I honestly thought that she wouldn't want me, that this was still an elaborate game to her.

"Bella, I…We… Oh shit! I am not good at this. I feel the same way about you, I thought that you didn't and was terrified of rejection. The other night, well, I don't need to tell you how amazing it was. I felt guilty that I was your first. You deserved so much better than the school freak. You had James, I mean, look at him compared to me. He is tall, tanned, muscular and all the girls notice him. Me? I wear glasses, acne outbreaks, no muscles and as for a tan, well, the only tan I have is a pair of shoes."

She was laughing at my response. I didn't know if this was good sign or not, but as she was smiling at me she was also shaking her head.

"Oh Edward, you really don't see yourself very clearly, do you? I don't care about looks. It's personality that gets me, and you certainly have plenty of that. You have intrigued me since the first day I came to school but I just never knew how to approach you. I am sorry for the way that the others treat you. I'm going to tell them to back off. Please know this though, I like you, a lot and I want to continue with whatever it is that we have here. All I need to know is that you feel the same? If you don't, then I will leave, and forget that this ever happened. Please don't worry because I won't say a word to anyone."

I sighed deeply. Wow. She had just laid her soul bare to me, and I now know how she felt. If I was honest, I felt the same way about her but I am so terrified that she'll reject me, that this was all part of some game to her. It just didn't seem like it..

"Well, you certainly know how to shock a guy. I never would have dreamed that you would be interested in me like that. I thought that you were playing some kind of game with me. I kept waiting for the punch-line of the joke to be delivered. So where do we go from here?"

"Hmmm, I'm thinking we just take it as it comes, no pressure, no deadlines. I love spending time with you and after the other night, well, I think there is so much that you can teach me. How many girlfriends have you had?"

Shit! How do I answer that one? I decided to bend the truth slightly.

"No, there was someone who I was seeing, but not seriously. It didn't work out so we went our separate ways. No-one knew about it, we kept it very private."

"Hmm, do I know her? Should I be worried about a jealous woman ripping my eyes out?"

"You have nothing to worry about. It was more or less just sex. It was simply that, no emotions. God,that makes me sound like such a man whore!"

I laughed at my own comment; if only she knew the truth of it. She laughed with me and looked relieved. There are some conditions that I wanted to put on our fledgling relationship, though, and I'm not sure if she would agree.

"Bella, there is something that I want to say, and I'm not sure how you will feel about this. I think that we shouldn't tell anyone about us to start with. I want you to be comfortable and I don't think that we will get any peace if this gets out. People won't understand. I want this to work, and think that we need to get used to the idea ourselves first. Plus I don't want your dad coming after me with a gun."

I laughed lightly at the last part as the vision of Charlie drawing his gun on me appeared in my head. She looked deep in thought. I watched as the moonlight played gently over her face as she digested what I have just said. Then she smiled at me before she spoke,

"Okay. That sounds like a great idea to me. There is also James to consider. As you know, he is dangerous and I don't want him anywhere near you. I also think that people would interfere too much, and to be honest the idea of sneaking around kinda turns me on, makes it more… interesting."

She leaned across to me and started to kiss me. I was pushed onto my back and found her straddling me, her hips ground over my groin. As much as I wanted this, it couldn't happen here. Anyone could walk in on us and I am not sure we can manage this in silence. Hell, I know I won't be able to. I pushed her back, away from me as confusion colored her face.

"What? Edward, I thought that this is what you wanted?"

"It is, but it isn't the time or place for it. We could so easily get caught. Dad is on a night shift, if he comes home early."

She turned on a cute pouty face. "Hmm, but I want you, now. Oh I know! How about we sneak out to that building in the back garden? Bet no one would find us there."

I nearly had a coronary then and there. She must be talking about the summerhouse. Oh no, there is no way we would be heading out there for anything. That was where I met Tanya and there was no way I could taint what I feel for Bella by being in there with her. I needed to think quickly.

"Let's just stay here. I know that we can't, well, you know. But that's not all I want from you. Just stay with me, please?"

She gave me a winning smile and a chaste kiss on the lips before clambering off my lap to lay down next to me. Her back was pressed firmly to my chest. I nestled my face into the back of her neck, inhaling her scent as she laid there. My hands found their way around her, holding her to me. Our legs intertwined together and I swore you could not get a sheet of paper between us, we were so close. I kissed the back of her head and whispered.

"Sleep tight, my love." And with that we fell into a slumber together and I could not have been happier.

I woke the next morning to find that Bella was still in my bed, but we had changed positions. I was on my back with her head resting on my chest. She looked so peaceful. Glancing at the clock, I panicked. It was 8am, and if Mom discovered that she was not in the guest room, then I dread to think what she would say. I had no time to think this through as my bedroom door swings open and in the doorway stood no one other than Mom. With her hands firmly on her hips and a very annoyed look on her face, she authoritatively says,

"Edward, do you want to explain to me exactly what the hell is going on here?"

Authors Note:

OK so don't shout at me for leaving it there – my poor beta emailed me to ask how I could do that to her… Thanks go out as always to the fabulous Cosmom for putting up with me and beta'ing this mess for me. LOVE YOU! Also Mamasutra my beloved friend and pre-reader who makes things make sense.

Thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing, and as I am feeling generous today if you review I will send you a sneak preview from the next chapter. I have put Taken back up this week and the beta'd chapters are there for you to read, and also please do check out Duplicity. That is my new fic where I am writing FFaddward's plot bunny for her.

I hope to be able to update this before Christmas (fingers crossed) but I for any reason I don't hope you all have a fab Christmas/Holidays and will be back with this soon!

Take care

Lou x x x