Oliver Queen's POV
Looking at Barry's un-moving form on the bench made me think about all those times the darkness consumed me. I have always thought of myself as a monster, one that enjoyed killing. The reason why I was so reluctant to expand the team was because everyone around me always gets hurt, or killed, like Laurel. Every decision I make could easily affect my team, or their fate. I basically control who lives and who dies.
I also decide the future of the city. For example, if I had let Damien Dahrk roam this city free, then star city would be no more.
All this has always made me think about one thing: was my dad's suicide in vain? He wanted me to live, but was that really a wise choice?
Come to think of it, Slade Wilson happened because of me. Ra's Al Ghul happened because of me. Vigilante happened because of me. And now Prometheus, also happened because of me. Which begs the question: would this city be better off if I hadn't returned?
I thought I wanted to make this city safer, but instead I might have caused an opposite effect.
Barry started to stir, which pulled me out of my thoughts.
"Hey, Oliver, what the hell m I doing here?" He demanded once he realised where he was.
He tried to get up, but we cuffed his hands in case he tries something again.
"And do me the courtesy of explaining why exactly I'm tied up like a criminal? What do you have installed for me? Cuz I am a busy man, you see. I need to get back-"
"To trying to kill yourself, Barry?"
"Are you going to lie to me, Oliver? Like everybody else did? Is this also a charade?" He asked in a really low voice.
That surprised me. I was expecting more of a denial.
I sighed heavily, then pulled a chair and sat down next to his bed.
"Barry. Listen to me, and don't interrupt. Yes, I am going to give you the talk. Just shut up and listen."
He opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again, then snapped it shut. Clearly, he was annoyed.
"You remember what I told you inside that vault right? In star labs back when the dominators attacked us? Well, recall how I told you I was missing for 5 years? Those 5 years weren't all spent on Lian Yu. I was dragged onto a ship, was a prisoner for some time, escaped, hired by an A.R.G.U.S agent, killed, joined the Bratva, killed a lot more, then came back here. I killed so many during those 5 years that I lost count. When I came back to the city to become the arrow, a lot more problems popped up. Sometimes, it makes me wonder whether I should have just stayed on Lian Yu for the rest of my life. People I recruited for my little crusade died, like Laurel. I am willing to risk my life to save my own city, but I am not willing to sacrifice my teammates' lives because of me. I may not show it, but every time my team mates get hurt, I feel very guilty, and angry at myself for allowing them to get hurt, or not being to protect all of them. Because I decided to pursue some criminal, and allowed them to join me.
"Sometimes, I'm angry that I started all this in the first place, ending up with so many unnecessary deaths and casualties. A lot of innocents got hurt because of psychotic criminals that decided to avenge their partners. But many people have started to rely on me to guard this city. They trust me. And I don't plan on letting them down.
"Just like the citizens star city need the arrow, people in central city need the flash. Sure you might have made some erroneous decisions, but I have too. I look into you eyes, and I see you carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.
"Yeah, Oliver here always feels the same too. And trust me it's not easy trying to talk him out of his mind. Trust me I have no idea how we got stuck with one stubborn Oliver Queen. " Felicity joked as she walked over, her heels clicking on the floor.
I waited for her to wander back to her beloved computer set before continuing.
"Your teammates are there for you. You have got to stop pushing them away. "
"It's not even about that anymore, Oliver. They hate me, they have always hated me. But because I decided to burden them with my problems, they fake a smile and pretend to like me. Secretly, they loathe me. They have fed me so many many lies, and I am so sick and tired of this game they're playing. I quit. I'm done. I'm tired Oliver. I don't wanna do this anymore. I don't know if I can."
"Uh, Barry, your phone was dead. I just plugged it in and there are about..." Felicity trails off as she scrolls down Barry's phone.
"I don't know how many messages and missed calls there are here. Are you so sure that they hate you? Or did you just ignore what they keep telling you repeatedly? Calls from Iris, Joe, Cisco and..."
She stuck her hand in her purse and started digging for something. Her phone, probably.
"Speak of the devil..." she mumbled.
"Hey Cisco, yeah, Barry?" She looked at Barry and me. I shook my head and signaled her not to tell Cisco anything...important.
"Yup, he was here last night. What he was doing?" She looked at me. I mouthed the words "movie night".
"Ahh...we had a movie night last night... yeah... he's fine. Hey speaking of, do you any suggestions on the designs I sent you?..." she chatted off happily with a member of the "Geek squad", as I like to call it.
"Stop blaming yourself, Barry. And trust your teammates. They didn't lie to you. They were speaking the truth. You just refuse to acknowledge that it's real."
"Oliver, if you're done with your little story telling, I would highly appreciate it if you uncuff me."
As I reached for the keys, Felicity's shrill voice rang through.
"Oliver! Hostage situation in the star city general."
I offered my hand to Barry.
"You up for a little ass-kicking Barry? It'd be fun to team up." Felicity asked hopefully, like a little kid begging for chocolate.
"Yeah, no. I'm just gonna, go. Sorry to trouble you guys." And then he sped off.
If he keeps thinking like that... I know what will happen, and nobody's gonna like it.
Okay I know it's crappy, I can't think, can't think m sorry. Open to any and all suggestions. Please review! Sorry for crappy language and grammar and content. Where will Barry go? What will he do? Stay tuned till the next time and please review! :)