Third-person's POV
Barry watched as Cisco strolled out of the vault, clutching tightly the bottle of anti-depressants he was given.
He fiddled with it for a while. Then, he popped the cap open, and took out a pill. The green and white pill sat innocently on the palm of his hand, staring up at him.
Very slowly and reluctantly, Barry put the pill into his mouth and swallowed it dry.
Comfortable silence filled the room. Barry was relishing in his alone-time when Caitlin's voice rang over the p.a system.
"Barry, meta attack in the park."
He groaned at someone disrupting his well-enjoyed silence, pocketed the little bottle, then sped out of the lab.
Barry glared at the bottle on his white marble table, half filled with prozac.
Sure, the pills made him less depressed, but it also made him feel numb. Like he couldn't feel anything. Like nothing mattered and everything and everyone was just there for the sole purpose of being there.
It was like he couldn't feel anything at all. All the thoughts were still there, but it's as if everything happened in slow motion.
So he picked up the bottle and tossed it in the bin.
And walked to the store to get himself a packet of razor blades.
And sliced open his diced up arm again.
And again.
And again.
He watched as the little droplets of crimson liquid slowly bubbled up, and slid down his arm, splatting on the wooden floors.
And for a short second, it's as if he could feel again, like he was alive again, like he was somehow... complete.
But that was ephemeral. Nothing was perpetual these days. So he hid it from the team. From Joe. From Iris. From anyone who cared about him.
Because he could not bear to see the disappointed looks on their faces again. He made sure to be extra careful, buying jumpers with extra long sleeves.
A long time ago, he had ran out of space on his arm. Each time he cut overlapping the previous marks, it would hurt less, and less, and less, until it was just blood.
So he moved downwards, down through his stomach, then hips, then thighs.
The sharp stinging was welcoming and addicting. He wanted more. This new pain was inviting, intriguing in so many different ways.
Barry still went to work, ran around the city helping people, fixed the crumbled pieces of debris of his walls into a thicker, and harder one. Almost impenetrable. Put on smiles, and played along with everybody's little charade.
He couldn't even wear shorts now, fearing people discovering his little secret, and take it away from him again.
Some people might have noticed, others might not have. Only if you look very very closely, examining every little detail as if it's crucial to saving someone's life, will you realise.
That Barry Allen, was only a broken shell, that resembled the formerly charismatic and winsome guy that everybody knew and loved.
End. Sorry I know it's been a very very long time since the last update. I've been watching a new TV show while the arrowverse shows are still shooting the newest seasons-Teen wolf. And I have to say, it is an incredible and remarkable TV show. Sadly the last season has already premiered and only 8 more episodes are to be released. I'm so gonna miss the cast on TV! So check it out if you haven't watched it. It is a production that cannot be described by words. Well anyway, thank you everyone for sticking through the entire story, although it's pretty crappy. I hope you guys can review of PM me some writing suggestions on how to improve for the upcoming one shots. Thanks and I really hope you enjoyed!