A/N: FiresOfHope, thanks for your amazing review. I hope that this lives up to the last two chapters. Warning: Lots of capital letters. You guys may have realized by now that I can be a bit offensive, but rest assured, I only hate on Tigerstar, Mapleshade, Darkstripe, and pretty much the Dark Forest cats in real life.
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"Well, since ThunderClan has proved to be incompetent, I think that I should send three WindClan cats instead." Onestar proclaimed.
"BOO!" Leafpool shouted, glaring at Crowfeather.
"THE WARRIOR CODE! THE CODE!" Hollyleaf screamed, nearly fainting. This occurred more and more often with every passing day.
"THE WARRIOR CODE IS A LOAD OF BULL, SO SHUT UP!" Yellowfang yelled.
"NEVER, YOU CODE-BREAKER!" Hollyleaf tackled Yellowfang and the she-cats shredded each other apart.
"CROWFEATHER (BECAUSE NO ONE LIKES YOU), FURZEPELT (BECAUSE OF YOUR RIDICULOUS NAME), AND HAWKHEART (BECAUSE YOU KILLED BLUESTAR'S MOM). YOU THREE GO MAKE WIMDCLAN LOOK BETTER THAN THUNDERCLAN!" Onestar screeched so loudly that Tallstar jumped on him and slapped him across the face with his paw.
"Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." Tallstar shushed him, spitting all over his face in the process. "Be quiet in the library."
"THIS ISN'T A ****ING LIBRARY!" Sandgorse shouted defiantly.
"Noooooooo my faaatheerrrr." Tallstar had a heart attack.
"Okay cats roll out!" Crowfeather ran through the plains of StarClan, pursued by Hawkheart and Furzepelt.
"Guys wait!" Hawkheart began to dig a hole in the dirt. "Diggin' a hole, diggin' a hole," He chanted.
"We aren't in Minecraft, you brain dead fool." Crowfeather snapped. But everyone knows that in Minecraft, you should never dig straight down. Hawkheart fell into an underground cave system and landed in a pool of lava, burning to death. And so there were two.
"Crowfeather you sonuva*****, choose your loyalty. Feathertail, Nightcloud, or Leafpool. Is a Shadowclan she-cat next?" Furzepelt ranted as they moved on, ignoring Hawkheart's screams of agony. "I mean, I think I ship you with Feathertail the most, but I dunno…"
"I HATE YOU." Crowfeather exploded into a million tiny ducks. Furzepelt fled in horror. He then bumped straight into a twoleg. It picked him up.
"Look, I already gave Mousefur all of the info, but to continue this fic, you're going to inevitably die too. Sorry." BlazingFlames showed him the YouTube video, then sent him back.
"Everyone I know Shrek's secret!" Furzepelt shouted.
"First I have something to tell you." Furzepelt's mother stepped forward. "Your name isn't actually something to be proud of, there was a typo on your birth certificate. The guy typing it had an aneurysm and spazzed out when he was entering it in."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO." Furzepelt fainted.
"That was a lot of Os." Ferncloud commented.
"I like Cheetos." Purdy announced, going cross-eyed.
"That was the sanest thing you've ever said." Lionblaze looked at Purdy with newfound respect. "Wait, how did you get into StarClan you filthy stray?"
"WE NEED TO USE OUR DEVILCRAFT - I MEAN MEDICINE SKILLS TO FIX HIM." Runningnose ran towards Furzepelt and sneezed. Mothwing took the brunt of the damage, dissolving as if acid had been poured on her. Some got onto Furzepelt just as he woke up, and he dissolved as well.
"Runningnose, you're fired." Blackstar said, shaking his head.
"It's RiverClan's turn to see if we can do it right!" Leopardstar declared. Crookedstar nodded, and in the background Rainflower retched at the sight of his face.
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Another A/N: I think you're starting to figure out the pattern here now. Any requests for the three RiverClan cats? Put your suggestions in that little box below, and as always, stay awesome ;)