Emma was outside Ruby's apartment contemplating, once again, if it was a good idea. It was late at night; visiting her parents or her brother, and asking for a place to stay wasn't an option, as they would surely ask what happened. Another option was to sleep in her car, but in the morning it would be hell to pay, especially for her back. So here she was, outside Ruby's house, ready to knock the door. She figured Ruby would also ask what had happened but Emma hoped she would be more supportive and a little less judgmental. After two knocks, her brunette best friend, dressed in her pajamas, opened the door, confusion written across her face.
''Hey Ems. I wasn't expecting you. Is everything okay?'' She asked worried, seeing Emma's red puffy eyes.
''Can I crash here tonight?'' Emma pleaded; her emotions threatening to escape through her eyes again.
''Emma, you're worrying me. Did something happen between you and Regina?'' Ruby pressed her brow furrowing as she took in the whole of Emma's disheveled appearance. Suddenly remembering that they were still at the front door, she opened the door wider, allowing the blonde to enter. She guided them towards the living room, where Belle, also dressed in her pajamas, was snuggled cozily in an armchair reading a book. Upon seeing Emma enter the room, she closed it, and looked up her face also becoming worried at Emma's hopeless expression.
''Emma?''
''Hey Belle'' Emma managed hoarsely as she plopped down on the couch. Her hand trying to loosen her tie.
''Okay, let me bring some cocoas and then you'll tell us what happened?'' Ruby asked. Emma nodded and closed her eyes, trying to find some relief from the pain she was feeling.
Ten minutes later, Ruby re-entered the living room, carrying three mugs of hot chocolate. She offered one to Emma, who took it, giving her gratitude to Ruby and took a sip from her mug. Ruby and Belle watched her expectantly. Seeing her friends watching her she sighed and decided to speak.
''Regina and I had a fight.'' She admitted.
''That much was kinda obvious Em.'' Ruby said, rolling her eyes. Belle slapped her brunette fiancé on the thigh, warning her to stop.
''Seeing you here this late, sort of suggests it was a big fight…?'' Belle suggested encouragingly.
''Yeah it kind of was.''
''Ok, spill, what did you do to her?'' Ruby said exasperatingly.
''Why do you assume I did something to her?'' Emma replied defensively.
''Because I know you Emma. You have your guilty face on and if it was Regina's fault she would have been the one to come here, not you. So spill.'' Ruby stated shrugging her shoulders.
''I..." she started and then paused; she realized she hadn't even explicitly admitted it to Regina yet. Regina knew, but Emma hadn't actually said the words. She inhaled deeply; she wasn't even sure the words would come out.
"I cheated on her.'' Emma confessed.
''You what?!'' Ruby shrieked, immediately flying to her feet to tower over Emma, making her wince and tuck her head back down.
''I cheated on her." Emma replied feeling the words scrape from her throat. It wasn't getting easier to say.
"With my boss." She elaborated. "Regina found out, she found a letter" Emma shrugged watching the scene unfold in front of her eyes again. "She confronted me about it, I told her the truth and well she kicked me out.''
''If I was Regina, I would have killed you first, then kicked you out.'' Ruby admitted scowling at her best friend. Could they still be best friends after this? Ruby pondered briefly.
''Ruby…'' Belle whispered warning, but Ruby continued.
''How could you do this to her? Are you really that much of a fucking idiot Swan?" Ruby's hands flew to her head and she turned away unable to look at Emma anymore.
"Oh my god, poor Regina, I can't imagine how she's feeling right now. I can't believe you did this to her.'' Ruby said shaking her head.
''It was a moment of weakness…'' Emma trailed off; a lame excuse and she knew it.
''No it was a moment of pure idiocy. I didn't have you to be that thick Emma'' Ruby spat angrily.
''Come on Rubes, I came here for some support, not you disowning me.'' Emma whined but Ruby was having none of it.
''Well you came to the wrong place. You need to leave, I don't want you staying here. All I can think of right now is Regina and how she's feeling. She's my friend too and I won't betray her like that.''
''But I'm your best friend'' Emma whispered, pleading eyes staring up at her, dumbfounded by Ruby's attitude.
''Not right now I'm not Emma. I'm with Regina on this one.'' She tossed behind her as she left the living room. Belle moved from where she was sitting, to sit next to Emma, making soothing circles on her back while the blonde started crying uncontrollably. After a few minutes, Emma stood up, wiped her eyes and moved towards the front door.
''Where are you going?'' Belle asked confused.
''You heard Ruby. She doesn't want me here.''
''Nonsense. I can't let you leave. You'll sleep in the guest room.'' Belle offered.
''No Belle it's okay. I already ruined one relationship I don't want to ruin yours by making you guys fight.''
''Don't worry about us." Belle smiled shortly, "Ruby's pissed right now, and I'm not saying that she doesn't have the right to by the way." Belle reprimanded sternly. "Because what you did to Regina is completely unacceptable Emma, but…" she sighed, "You are also my friend and tonight you need a place to stay.''
''Okay.'' Emma relented, and Belle signaled her to follow her on the guest room.
''So'' Belle said as she opened the guest room. ''In the closet there are some extra blankets in case you get cold and extra pillows. I'll bring you some towels for the morning and dig out a pair of Ruby's pajamas. There's spare toothbrushes under the sink." Belle informed as she moved around the guest room making sure that everything was okay. "Any breakfast request?" she quizzed as she made her way to the door satisfied that her guest would be comfy.
''Actually I'll eat at home. I'll need to go over to get changed. But thanks anyway.'' Emma said sincerely.
''It wouldn't be a problem Em-'' Belle started in that soft soothing accent of hers, but Emma cut her off.
''No Belle, thanks for letting me stay. I really appreciate it.'' Emma said as she offered a smile to the brunette earning a small one in return.
''Okay, well if you need anything, just let me know. Goodnight Emma."
"Goodnight Belle.'' and with that Belle closed the guest room's door.
Upon closing the door, Emma fell to her knees and started crying.
After Belle closed the door, she moved towards hers and Ruby's bedroom. Sighing once, she opened the door to find her fiancé lying on the bed playing on the phone. Belle followed Ruby's example, lying beside her on the bed and lifting the book from her nightstand.
''So you let her stay.'' Ruby stated more than asked.
''Rubes she didn't have anywhere else to go. And I know, despite what she did, that you'd prefer her staying here rather than slumming in her car.'' Belle commented.
''She's a fucking idiot. She should get what she deserves.'' Ruby sneered, rolling onto her back to stare desperately at the ceiling.
''She's also your best friend darling, and you still care about her. Even if I did let her leave you would have called her to come back here.'' At Ruby's silence Belle pressed: ''Am I wrong?''
''No you're not'' Rube grumbled. "You never are." She allowed her mouth to creep into a small smile briefly. ''But I'm still mad at her and I'm not sure I'll ever be able to forgive what she's done to Regina. God, I mean has she completely lost her mind?'' Ruby asked the ceiling.
''She's hurting too, love.'' Belle argued and at Ruby's scoff she continued. ''Just listen.''
The silence in the room gave them the opportunity to listen to the blonde next door, crying as if her life depended on it. Ruby bite her bottom lip and turned to face Belle. She was still angry and a small pang of guilt crept into her chest for talking to her best friend the way she did.
''Should I go talk to her?'' Ruby asked and Belle shook her head.
''No, let her be. She needs to get it out of her system." Belle stroked Ruby's hair trying to sooth the tension from her girlfriend's brow. "We'll talk to her in the morning.''
The next morning Regina woke up feeling like a zombie. Her eyes were red from crying, with black circles traced beneath them, due to the lack of sleep. Truth be told, Regina managed to sleep less than two hours. When she woke up she prayed that everything that happened last night was a dream, a bad one, but no. Feeling her puffy eyes, she remembered that everything was quite real. Emma had cheated on her. New tears came to her eyes but she didn't let them fall. No, she wouldn't be one of those wives. Sure, every tiny bit of her insides was hurting like hell, but she wouldn't let Emma know that. If two could play a game, Regina was, oh so definitely, going to play her part. After getting up and getting ready for the day; requiring lots and lots of concealer to hide the black circles under her eyes, she went downstairs to make breakfast for her three sons. Her sons. She had to be strong for them, and keep them unaware, at least for now, until they had some sort of clue about what the hell they were going to do next. Of course they would ask about their mother why she wasn't there when they woke up. She was confident she could keep her youngest boys oblivious, but Henry would be more difficult. He was really quite perceptive and she knew he was already certain that something was wrong. Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she entered the kitchen. Her three boys were already awake and ready for their breakfast.
''Good morning my princes'' Regina exclaimed as happily as she could. In response she received three mumbles and she chuckled at that. Thank god, she had them in her life.
The breakfast preparation was mostly in silence since none of her sons were truly awake to speak. She briefly thought she might get through breakfast completely and they wouldn't even think to ask about Emma's absence. However, when they were all at the table, eating their breakfast Colin spoke.
''Where's ma? I came into your room this morning but you were alone. Is she still with grandpa?'' their boy asked innocently.
''She must have slept there, my dear, she did say that the case was difficult.'' Regina lied and Henry narrowed his eyes in suspicion. Before he managed to start asking his million questions a face standing on the kitchen door stopped him.
''Good morning!'' Emma said, smiling as she crossed the room. At the same moment, Regina stood up and moved to the fridge as she started to make lunch for the boys. Emma kissed the boys' head, except for Henry who avoided her and then stood there awkwardly.
''Did you sleep at grandpa's?'' Colin asked pleasantly, merely interested. ''Mom said it was a difficult case and you slept there.''
''Huh?'' Emma asked confused, completely forgetting her own lie.
''Yesterday, when you left for your parents' house.'' Regina explained deliberately and realization hit Emma.
''Oh, yeah right, it was a tough one. But don't worry kiddo, mama managed to get it all sorted.'' Emma said, winking to her son and ruffling his hair.
''Colin, Henry the school bus is going to be here soon. Say goodbye to your mother.'' Regina called, at which the boys complied. They both stopped before Regina to take their lunches and their morning kiss and fled, not before however Colin stopping once again in front of his blonde mother.
''See you at dinner mama.'' Colin said as he ran to catch up with Henry.
''Ashley will be here in a few. Can you please get him ready?'' Regina asked without looking at Emma.
''Yeah, sure.'' Emma replied and Regina left the kitchen without another word.
After getting Ezra ready for the day, Emma moved towards hers and Regina's bedroom. Opening the door she found Regina tidying the bedroom.
''Hey.'' Emma uttered, Regina jumped a little but fought with her instinct to look up and kept her back turned.
''Is Ezra ready?'' Regina asked, ignoring Emma's greeting.
''Yeah, he's in his room, playing with his toys. I came here to change.'' Emma said feeling the hostile energy radiating from Regina.
''You should pack some of your clothes and take them with you.'' Regina suggested bluntly, still not looking at her.
''Regina can we talk about this? Please!'' Emma implored and Regina sighed, settling herself on the bed.
''There's nothing to talk about. It's better to keep some distance right now.''
''What about the boys Regina? What are you going to tell them? Not seeing me here, it's going to confuse them enough.'' Emma pleaded. When it was just them in this Emma could almost pretend that it wasn't really happening; that it might all fade away like a nightmare in the morning sunshine. Once the boys found out it would all become far too real and she wasn't ready for that.
''Yeah right, because otherwise they'd see you all the time Emma.'' Regina snapped but sighed again the moment the words left her mouth.
''Look I don't want fight about this; I haven't got the energy. Please, if you at least care for me, do as I say.'' Regina begged and Emma nodded in defeat.
"Of course I care about you Regina, I love you."
''I'll let you pack you things.'' Regina said before shifting slowly from the bed and exiting, leaving Emma alone in the room.
After packing up her things, and spending a brief time with Ezra, Emma left the house. She hadn't seen him since last night and she hadn't realised how much she had missed him. She wanted to stay more and she was ready to call in sick to stay longer with him, but Ashley had showed up to take him for a walk to the park. There was no point in staying alone in the house; she would go mad if left with her own thoughts for too long right now.
Driving for a half an hour she reached the firm's parking lot. Parking her car, she exited it and moved towards the elevator in which she pushed the button for the 20th floor. The ride with the elevator wasn't long and mere minutes later she entered the small lounge.
Unfortunately the first person she met as she passed towards her office was none other than Jane who was smiling that cheeky smile which meant that she was ready to tease her.
''I was starting to worry Mrs. Swan. I thought you forgot for a moment that you had a job'' Jane teased, as Emma had predicted. However Emma was not in the mood for any teasing, especially from the women who was the catalyst for Emma tearing her own life apart. The blonde noticed her dire mood right away.
''What happened?'' Jane asked with a frown while following Emma towards the other's blonde office.
Seeing that the other blonde was anywhere near talking she pressed lightly.
''Emma, don't shut me out. What happened?''
''Regina knows about what I did.'' Emma blurted out, the moment both women were inside her office. The revelation made Jane's eyes widen in shock.
''Oh my god. How?''
''Because of your fucking 'love' letter. That's how.'' Emma spat and Jane winced; remembering her drunken tears pouring as her fingers shook typing her feelings out.
''Come on Emma, it's hardly my fault. I didn't know that your wife read your emails.'' Jane defended.
''She doesn't. But I forgot to disconnect from our home's computer; she opened the page to disconnect and she saw it.'' Emma's head filled with images of Regina's hopeless face asking her to admit nothing happened, but she couldn't tell her wife what she needed to hear.
''Fuck. I'm sorry Emma.'' Jane apologised and moved to comfort the blonde but Emma flinched and jerked away the moment Jane entered her personal space.
''No don't." Emma snapped holding her hand up to prevent Jane from coming any closer. "None of this would have happened if you hadn't accepted that job. This is all your fucking fault!''
''My fault? You could have stayed away the moment I told you that I liked you. Instead you came even closer. You're the one who came to my house that night.'' Jane defended, feeling her own heart shatter into pieces. She had poured her heart out in that email and Emma wasn't even accepting her feelings; only blaming her. Emma didn't care about her at all.
"And you had no second thoughts to spreading your legs!'' Emma shouted.
''You're such a dick Emma'' Jane cursed and Emma chuckled. At Jane's confused yet enraged face Emma stepped even closer, entering the other's blonde personal space and whispered snidely:
''That's the thing, 'babe'. Bitches like you, get turned on by dicks like me.'' Her eyes glared at Jane and suddenly widen from shock as Jane's hand slapped her cheek. This was the moment that Εmma's brother chose to barge into Emma's office.
''Hey is-.'' He tilted his head with confusion. ''Is everything okay here?'' he asked.
''Yes, Mr. Swan everything is fine. Ι was just leaving.'' Jane said in an authoritative voice as she passed by Nate, closing the door behind her.
''Did she just slap you?'' Nate asked his sister once the door closed and he was sure that Jane was out of the earshot.
''Just drop it Nate.'' Emma sighed as she fell exhausted and completely defeated into her chair.
''I didn't know that you two were close enough to piss her off enough to earn a slap. She seems to have quite the strength though. Your cheek is starting to swell.'' He teased and Emma shot him a glare.
''Anyway that's not why I'm here; it's dad's birthday tomorrow and mom said something about a birthday dinner. From the tone of her voice I could tell it's going to be quite the feast.'' He grinned, already visualising his satisfied, extended stomach by the end of the evening.
''Oh shit, I've completely forgotten. I have to get him a present.'' Emma groaned and Nate chuckled.
''Let Regina do it. She's much better than you at picking presents. Anyway, I should get going. I have a meeting in a few. See you later sis.'' Nate ruffled Emma's hair, before leaving her office.
Regina is the best at gifts. The thought was enough to send her spiraling into the dark corners of her mind again and she hastily grabbed a file from her in-tray and tried her best to read it. It took her several attempts to get through the first paragraph, but fighting the thoughts was better than letting them take hold. She knew there was still a lot worse to come before the whole thing was over.
Regina was at a coffee shop drinking her macchiato, and filling Kathryn in about everything that had happened in the last 12 or so hours. She was dressed in a maroon fitted dress along with her favorite black pumps and her make up impeccable as always.
''So, what are you going to do?'' Kathryn asked after Regina had finished recounting, while sipping from her cup of tea.
''I honestly have no idea Kat." She sighed. "It's still early to make any decisions that will affect the boys. I'm hurting like hell, it feels like I can't breathe. I can't make decisions now with all this running around my body; it would be unfair both to the boys, and Emma."
''Yet, she acted based purely on her impulses.'' Kathryn pointed out and Regina sighed.
''Well, I'm not Emma." Regina stated. Her head fell as another wave of emotion came crashing through her whole being. "Right now all I can think of is how I can hurt her the way she did. But I'm not that person. I can't jump into bed with some stranger only to revenge her.'' at which Kathryn nodded.
''And what with the kids now? I mean, you've kicked her out, will you let her see them whenever she wants?''
''She's their mother Kat. No matter what happened between us I can't forbid her seeing them. And in case you have forgotten she's a lawyer. She could easily take legal action against me, but I know she wouldn't, partly because I have plenty to accuse her of, but there's no point in going into such lengths. At least not now.'' Regina reasoned, allowing the idea to settle in her head. Is that what happens next? We get divorced? Kathryn was ready to reply when Regina's phoned started to ring. Seeing the ID caller Regina sighed but eventually answered the phone.
''Emma.'' She said curtly.
''Hey sorry to interrupt but tomorrow's my dad's birthday.'' Emma simply said.
''And?'' Regina asked impatiently.
''And mom invited us over for dinner. Me, you and the boys. So should I tell her yes or no?'' Emma asked hesitantly.
"I'll think and get back to you. Anything else?''
"No, I guess not.'' Emma admitted.
''Goodbye then.'' Regina said and hung up before Emma could respond. She tossed her cell phone onto the small round table and clutched her head in her hands.
''What did she want?'' Kathryn asked.
''It's her father's birthday tomorrow and Mary Margaret invited us for dinner.'' Regina admitted, looking up between her fingers.
''Are you going to go there and pretend that everything's fine?''
''Well I could say no and let Emma go alone but then they'll start asking questions, especially if my parents are also there, which is very possible."
''You haven't told them anything?''
''Of course not! Emma is too coward to tell her parents as her father would probably disown her and well if I tell my parents, mother will start saying how right she was about Emma all these years.'' She sighed and shook her head, "And I'm really not ready to answer all the questions that are going to come after.
''So I take it she didn't sleep at her parents' last night?'' Kathryn inquired.
"Seems like it. For all I know she could have slept in her car, which I doubt. So my guesses are either at Ruby's house or at her little whore's.'' Regina sneered as the thought hit her. Last night she hadn't even thought that Emma would go to Jane's; and now the idea gripped her about brought a new wave of terror with it. She didn't think her heart could sink any lower, until it did.
''She wouldn't right?''
''I don't know. She said a lot of things, like she would 'never do anything to hurt me' and look where we are now.'' Regina said, a tear escaping her eyes.
''Hey don't worry, everything's going to be okay.'' Kathryn said softly reaching over to stroke Regina's hand.
Regina chuckled. ''Oh things are far from okay Kat. We aren't talking about a five-month relationship here. We're talking about a ten year marriage. And that's the funny part here. You think you know the person you love and in the end you apparently know nothing about them. I don't know who Emma is right now, but I know she's not the person I fell in love with, Kat.''
''What do you mean?'' Kathryn asked confused.
''She's not my Emma. This isn't my girl.'' Her dark eyes only emphasized the despair of her words.