Chapter 39
APOV
I can't believe what I am seeing on the screen in front of me and to make it worse Christian has seen it to and the look on his face is enough to make me want all this to be just a dream. No such luck I am wide awake I know Christian is panicking on the inside but his face is really calm and soft which is unlike him.
"Baby how long have you been feeling like this for?"
" A few weeks I just put it down to stress as a lot has been happening lately and I just thought it was all due to that" I am physically shaking.
" Baby come here" He holds me and tells me everything is going to be ok we will go to the cake designers and then we will get a home pregnancy test and take it once we are home.
On the drive to the cake place Christian seems surprisingly calm and pretty happy I am guessing as he knows he will be soon eating chocolate cake, he is so adorable when there is chocolate cake involved. Once Taylor has parked the car Christian quickly gets out and comes around the car to open my door, he helps me out and kisses my head he holds my hand so tightly as we walk away from the car and head to the shop. We arrive at the cake shop and it is not what I expected at all it looks more like a designer clothes shop just without the clothes. The owner herself Miss Madeline Montgomery personally greets us and take us to the tasting room, We discuss size and shape of the cake I know Christian just wants the chocolate cake already he acting like a kid in a candy store now but he makes my heart melt.
We get plates filled with all different mini cakes on and I am in heaven I eat all of them and even go back for more, Christian only tries the chocolate one and is already sold on it I even eat the rest of his plate. We both decide that the chocolate is for us and Miss Madeline gives us a actual full size cake to take home she has made Christians day. I have wanted to enjoy this evening and get into wedding happy mode but I feel dread wash all over me as soon enough I will be taking a test that will seal our fates."Baby come on let's go home, Oh shit Elliot is coming over for dinner" "Thats ok why don't you call in the takeout order and it should arrive once we are home" " Baby I was not worried about the food I was thinking more of the test" " Oh right well I will need to go and buy one" He gives me a funny look oh I know that he did not send Taylor to go and pick one up I am mortified sensing my panic Christian tells me that he asked Miss Jones to pick one up as she was going to the supermarket while we are out.
" Christian are you fucking serious right now?, This is between me and you and you should have not asked Gail to do such a personal thing. I am capable of going out and picking up a test you know"
" Baby I am sorry I just didn't want the press getting a hold of any information do you really want the paps getting a picture of you buying a pregnancy test and then it being all over the gossip rags"
" I couldn't give a fuck Christian is this what you did with all your subs make things go away or get other people to clean up your mess for you. I am so sorry that I inconvenience your life and make things difficult god forbid anything to change the littler perfect Christian Grey world you have going on"
We don't speak all the way home and the atmosphere once we are back home is so tense Miss Jones has put the test in the bathroom for me I thank her and apologise to her for her having to buy it. Christian tries to follow me into the bathroom is he serious he wants to actually watch me pee on a stick this man has no idea of what boundaries are, I tell him once I am done I will let him know and he can come in and we can wait out the three minutes together. After I have done the test I place it down on the counter and wash my hands and call Christian in, He wraps his arms around me and tells me everything is going to be ok which makes me feel bad for losing it with him earlier.
" I am sorry" We bot say in unison.
" Christian no please let me talk first I should not have lost it with you like that I am so sorry I know this is just as new to you as it is to me and I maybe overreacted a little. I know that I am always bringing up the whole sub thing and I am sorry for that but it is so hard not to feel like that sometimes". He
looks so saddened by what I have just said maybe I am not as ok with the sub thing as I like to make out.
" Baby no I am sorry I should have thought about what I was doing before I went ahead and did it, I just wanted to keep our business our business and I am so used to involving Taylor and Miss Jones into my personal business I forget sometimes that maybe I overstep. I never want you to feel like a sub baby your going to be my wife my equal and I love you more than life itself"
Well I know I had a point about Miss Jones going for the test but I feel bad as I keep throwing the whole sub thing back in his face I should really stop doing that as it is a low blow.
" Baby how are you feeling about all of this?"
" Nervous scared I guess how most women would feel right now. How are you feeling?"
" honestly baby I thought I would have lost my shit went mental and needed Flynn for the first time in so long but I feel kinda calm and excited" He places his hand on my stomach.
" The thought of you carrying our little mini me makes me smile"
Well if that's not enough to make any women turn into an emotional mess I don't know what will. I hear the phone alarm I set go off and we both nervously stand there neither one of us making a move for the test, Christian holds my hand as I reach out for the test I hold it in front us so we can both see it and the disappointment hits really fast.
NOT PREGNANT.
CPOV
I really can be a dumbass at times I didn't think that Miss Jones doing what I asked would turn into a major problem for Ana, I guess not thinking gets me into more trouble than its worth I have never been in a relationship before so I guess I am allowed a few tiny screw ups. All I can think of is if Ana is pregnant I thought this kinda news would make me lose my shit but I am really calm the thought of Ana having our little mini me growing inside of her makes me feel so happy and complete. Seeing that not pregnant on the screen of the test has made me feel like someone has just ripped out my heart, Seeing the broken look on Ana's face is killing me I know she wants to cry as I can she is holding back the tears. All I can do is hold her as I don't think I would say the right thing so I think for once I am best keeping my mouth shut.
The quietness in the room is broken by Taylor alerting me that Elliot is on his way up and the takeout is on its way also, I tell Ana I can send Elliot away and we can just be alone but she insists on having dinner just the three of us. We both make it though dinner the best we could I just hope Elliot didn't realise that anything was the matter as he will go straight to mother about it. Once Elliot has left and the staff have gone to their living quarters I ask Ana if she wants to talk or needs anything she said she just wants to sit and watch some tv before bed. We walk to the cinema room and she sits and get comfy while channel surfing, She looks up at me and asks if I am joining her I sit with her and hold her that close to me that I think I could actually be accused of suffocating her but I think we both need this.
While Ana is sleeping I make arrangements for us to fly to Aspen tomorrow for a few days as we need a break from everything here, I have informed Ros and got the jet ready to go I just hope Ana is ok with the idea I have contacted my house keeper at my home in Aspen requesting items to be purchased for Ana as I already have stuff their and I don't want Ana to worry about packing. Once I have done everything i snuggle into Ana as she is very restless tonight I am about to fall asleep when In hear Ana mumble please don't leave me Christian which is enough to kill me off. I awake at 3AM and Ana is not in the bed with me I check the bathroom and the closet and I hear a noise coming from the kitchen so I head towards it to see whats going on.
The sight I see has to be the most cutest thing I have ever seen Ana in my T-shirt with chocolate cake on her face I snap a picture on my phone before she notices me.
" Baby what are you doing?" She looks at me and knows she's been caught with her hands in the cookie jar.
" I will tell you what I am not doing I am not eating the entire chocolate cake you where so looking forward to getting a piece of. I think it might have been wild animals or birds or something" She has no idea how adorable she is right now.
I walk towards her and I lick the chocolate from her face and moan this cake is so good not that I will get a piece as I can see the entire cake has gone.
"Christian what the hell have I done? I was asleep and then I couldn't get the cake out of my mind and its like my whole body forced me out of bed and made me eat it. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me my stomach just wanted it and I gave in and let it have it. I was only going to have one piece but I had the entire cake"
I want to laugh but I think I best not as she looks really emotional right says that she can't go back to sleep so I tell her about Aspen and
she seems genuinely excited and even asks if we can leave soon and I don't see why not. Once we are ready to go Ana runs back into the bedroom and I hear her be sick over and over I guess eating a whole chocolate cake can do that to anybody. I call Dr Greene as I know what the test said but there has to be a reason for all this and a second opinion couldn't hurt. She is willing to meet us at her office in 40 minutes so we can get Ana checked out and head off to Aspen.