Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

A/N-thank you for the awesome reviews. Nikki :)

Part Four

Jacob managed to find a local car dealer and he sold his truck for as much as he could. He had to haggle a little, and with his intimidating size, it worked in his favor and he got as much as he wanted for it. Bella was still very upset, so she left it to him to book the airline tickets and arrange the flights home. They drove her truck to the airport and placed it in the long term parking bay. Paying for that just about cleaned them both out of money.

They were now sitting in the airport's lounge after checking in their meager luggage. The rest of their stuff had been stored in the back of Bella's truck and would have to be collected at a later date. Jacob bought them some sandwiches and offered Bella some, but she just shook her head saying that she wasn't feeling hungry. Her eyes were far away and she hardly spoke the whole time that they waited for their flight to be called. Jacob ate his food slowly, occasionally glancing at her worriedly. He wasn't sure what to say. Instead he just put his arm along the back of her seat and sat silently by her side. When she was ready to talk he would be there.

It was raining heavily when they reached Forks, the wind was strong and blew the hood of Bella's coat from her head. She had forgotten how bad the weather was here. She glanced up at the black clouds as they scattered across the sky; the violent wind moving them forcefully ever onward as the rain lashed down. The weather matched her mood, she felt despair and anguish. The last quick call she had made to her mother before her phone had died had not heralded good news. The doctors had managed to remove the bullet which had become lodged in Charlie's spine, but he was still unconscious, and they had no idea yet what damage had been done to the vertebra along his back. There was a strong possibility he could lose the use of his legs in the worst case scenario. Hearing this news made her think of Billy. How ironic that both men could be confined to wheelchairs in their latter years? Bella had no inkling of how Charlie would cope with that news or what that would mean for his future care.

The sound of a car horn pulled her out of her reverie. She felt Jacob touch her hand as he picked up their bags and pointed over to a dark Sedan. Bella saw her mother wave at her from the driver's side. Jacob and Bella ran over to the car and Bella climbed in the front seat while Jacob stowed the bags in the rear of the car and slipped into the back.

"This weather." Renee grumbled as she pulled back into the traffic. The windscreen wipers were going ten to the dozen and she had difficulty negotiating her way forward. "How was your flight, baby girl?"

"Long, the seats were awful. We were stuck next to a crying kid all the way back." Bella sighed and glanced behind her at Jacob. He was looking out of the window, a thoughtful expression on his face.

"I'm sorry to hear that." Renee said mildly. "Hello Jacob." She turned her head quickly and smiled at him.

"Hey, Mrs Turner. Thanks for picking us up." Jacob returned her smile weakly.

"That's no problem. Thanks for coming back with Bella. Billy is at the hospital so you'll see him there. I'll drop Bella at Charlie's so she can stow her stuff. Would you like to go home first?" She asked.

"No, I'll leave my gear at Charlie's too for the moment if that's okay. I'll pick it up later." Jacob replied.

"Okay." Renee squinted as she peered through the foggy windscreen. She had to turn on the blowers to dry and demist the screen.

"What happened, mom?" Bella asked. She hadn't been able to get the full story from Renee as the credit on her cell had run out and then the battery had died.

"There is still an investigation going on into the exact circumstances, but the gist of it is that Charlie answered a late call. Now normally he should have had some other officer with him, but for some reason that no one has been able to substantiate, he went out alone. Someone was seen breaking into Newton's. They had smashed one of the front windows and disabled the alarm somehow. Anyway Charlie confronted the perps in the midst of the raid and when he tried to give chase to one of the them, the other shot him in the back. That is all I have been told." Renee glanced at her daughter. Bella's face had turned white and she looked sick.

"Why did he go out alone? I don't understand." Bella ran a hand agitatedly through her hair. "He was always a stickler for the rules."

Renee heard Jacob clear his throat and she twisted her head to look at him again. He had a worried frown on his face as if he was building up to say something. Renee had a good idea of what it was he wanted to confess to Bella. "Baby girl there is something you need to know." She decided to get there first.

"What?" Bella looked at her mother feeling perplexed.

"When I went to your father's house to get some of his things...well I found a lot of empty bottles and cans. They were all piled up in the kitchen. The house was also quite a mess. From what Billy has let slip I think your father has been drinking. I suspect he had been when he answered the call that night." Renee confessed.

"That's utter bullshit." Bella snapped. "Dad likes a beer or two but he would never drink on duty."

"He has been Bella." Jacob's voice startled her. She glanced behind her and saw the worry shining in his eyes. "I didn't want to say until we reached the hospital, but Charlie has a drink problem. Dad has been trying to get him to seek help for it, but he just won't admit there is anything wrong."

"That can't be true." Bella glared at him; hating having her father's reputation impugned in such a way.

"It is true. I don't want to upset you but you need to know the truth." Jacob said softly. "He started using the alcohol as a crutch when you cut him out of your life. It hurt him when you never called or wrote. It was his way of numbing the pain I guess."

Bella's face flushed as she felt guilty tears spring to her eyes. She twisted away from Jacob and refused to meet her mothers eyes. She said no more, just stared out of the side window, seeing nothing.

Bella sat by her father's bedside and stared around at all the machines that he was hooked up to. She recognized some but had no idea of what the others were for. The constant beeps were jarring on her already frazzled nerves. Charlie looked shrunken lying in the hospital bed, she had hardly recognized him. His hair was now fully grey, even his mustache. There were more lines on his face then she remembered and his skin looked dull. The tell tale red veins around his nose and the corner of his mouth were dead give-aways that Jacob had not been lying. She recalled her grandfather, Charlie's own father, he had been an alcoholic, and he'd had the same red veins.

"Oh god, dad." Bella choked out. She took his limp hand in her own, it felt cold and lifeless. "I'm sorry. I never meant for this to happen. I didn't. I just thought you would be better off without me in your life. I only ever caused you trouble."

She began to sob, well aware of how pathetic and lame her excuses sounded to her own ears. In the end she been simply selfish. Looking back on her time in Forks she could see clearly now how rotten and uncaring she had been to others around her. It wasn't a pretty picture. Jacob had been right when he had said she was selfish and treated the people who cared about her like crap. It was hard seeing herself as she really was and she shivered thinking back on how ungrateful she had been to all those who'd had a hand in protecting her life back then; Jacob, Billy, her dad and the pack. She had barely acknowledged their role in keeping her safe. Her whole focus had been on Edward and the Cullen's.

"When you wake up I promise I'm going to take care of you, dad." Bella vowed. "Even if I have to move back here permanently. I'll be the daughter that I should have been. Please forgive me." She lay her forehead on his arm and began to cry as if her heart would break.

Billy was glad to see his son. Jacob hunkered down beside his father and hugged him tightly. Billy felt more fragile then ever. Jacob was certain that he had lost weight. He pulled back and looked into Billy's careworn face. His eyes were moist and the lines on his face seemed deeper as he fretted over his best friend.

"I'm so glad that you came back."

"Me too." Jacob pulled up a chair and sat next to Billy. "How have you been?"

"So so."

"Dad?"

"It has been hard. Your sister does her best, but you know Rachel?" Billy didn't have to say anymore.

Jacob knew how impatient his sister could be and as for Paul he had a fiery temper. He winced, he should never have left his father in their care. "I'm back now."

"For how long?" Billy pressed.

"For good. I won't be leaving again." Jacob promised him.

Billy's face shone with relief. It softened the lines on his face. "I am so thankful to hear that son."

Jacob patted his father's shoulder, discreetly ignoring the tears that had begun to leak out of Billy's eyes.

Jacob was still waiting when Bella finally emerged from her dad's room hours later. She had only left because the hospital staff had to do their checks. She was startled to see him waiting outside the room, sitting on one of the hard backed hospital chairs. "I thought you had gone home."

"No, I wanted to see that you were alright." Jacob touched her shoulder and then her face gently. "You've been crying."

Bella wiped her face with the sleeve of her shirt. "Where's Billy?"

"Paul came to take him home, he was exhausted. Your mom has gone back to Charlie's to freshen up then she'll be back." Jacob replied.

"Oh." Bella felt lost. Her arms wrapped around her middle as she gazed dully into the distance, not meeting Jacob's eyes. "You should go home too. Thanks for everything you've done so far." She mumbled.

"No, I'm staying." Jacob said firmly.

"You don't need to. I'm here. I'm fine." Bella slumped down on Jacob's vacated seat.

"No I am staying and no you are not fine. Stop pushing me away, Bella. I am your friend. I want to help you. For once in your life, let me." Jacob chided her gently.

Bella wiped at her face again. More tears were welling in her eyes. He had said the words she most needed to hear. "Yes." She whispered brokenly. "Yes please, stay Jake. Please."

It had been the first time that she had used his old nickname. Jacob sat beside her and put an arm across her shoulders. Bella leaned into him and began to shake as she finally allowed him to comfort her.

A/N-thanks for reading! :'(