Dimitri walked through the door about 30 minutes later and I felt my heart break all over again. I wish I'd been scared enough to let someone tell him or leave a note or leave a text message, but this had to be done the right way.

"Hey. Lissa said you needed to talk. Is everything ok?" he walked over to me and attempted to put his arms around me but I backed up. "Roza, what's wrong?"

"I can't do this." My heart broke seeing his expression of shock and how he didn't seem to understand what I was saying.

"Can't do what?" he asked arms crossed over his chest in a defensive kind of manner.

"You. Me. Us. It's not working. Or maybe it never did. I'm leaving." I let the words come out as serious as possible but also trying to not hurt him more than I had to.

"Why? Rose, if this is one of your messed up jokes then…"

"I'm serious. This isn't working. It was stupid to try and make it work. We need to move on and find someone we're going to be happy with." I cut him off and dropped my eyes to the floor, trying to keep my cool and not cry. Every word was like salt in a wound though.

"I am happy, happier than I have been in a long time." He argued his voice full of hurt.

I lifted my head and looked into his brown eyes. "I'm not. You have always told me to do the right thing for everyone and myself. I feel like this is it. This isn't going to work and I'd rather end it before either of us gets more involved. You need to find someone you really love. Someone who can give you a bunch of kids and who you don't have to worry about being killed protecting someone else."

"Rose, I love you! What does it take to get you to understand that I don't want anyone else? You are the only thing that matters to me." He was hurt and I felt the guilt wash over me for what I had to say next.

"I don't love you anymore though. And I can't keep pretending like I do." I didn't mean a word of it but though his face didn't changed, his eyes were pain filled and I walked past him and out the door with my bag in hand.

I made it to my car and turned to see he was still in the doorway but he was on his knees holding his face in his hands and tears fell free from his eyes. And finally I let them fall from mine.

I cried the whole way to the airport and was greeted with my mother and father's arms around me. They led me onto the plane and I watched as the Academy disappeared out of my life for the next 10 months.

"Kiz, you need to talk to us. What happened with you and Dimitri?" Abe spoke up and I looked at him and my mom.

"We broke up." I felt my nausea from earlier return and the guilt that came with it.

"I know that, Kiz. But why?" my father's expression never changed as he stared at me.

"I can't give him kids, he deserves to be with someone who can." My mom was shocked and my father rolled his eyes.

"He loves you for you. You should know that, but if this is what you think is best then we're not going to stop you." My mom answered and my dad put an arm around her. I smiled. Seeing them happy was at least something I could live with. My nausea increased a little as we got higher off the ground. So I finally gave up and just went to sleep.

"Rose, wake up we're here." My mom had gently nudged me awake and I could see her eyes bright with excitement. Which was strange considering she was never excited. We got off the plane and all I could see was green grass and blue skies and… castles and men in kilts? Oh boy this was going to be fun.

"Let's go. Our cabin is not far from here." Janine was nothing if rushing to get settled and off we went. She and Abe walked hand in hand the entire time and I felt my stomach twist up even more.

When we got to our little cabin it was small but big enough to be a house. Two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living room, and a kitchen. Right now all I wanted to do was sleep but I decided to stay up and watch TV for a bit.

I wound up watching the only thing that wasn't in another language. Which happened to be Dear John. By the end of the movie I was thanking God I wasn't that big of a bitch and not tell the guy. I mean for fuck's sake at least I didn't let him come back and say "Hey guess what, I'm married."

I turned the TV off and put my arms around myself and cried. I just want him happy and he can't be that way with me. There was no way I could ever give him a baby. Hell, I didn't even know if I really wanted kids. He was the only person I ever wanted to have a baby with though and was more than likely the only person who could give me the want to have one.

I dozed off and smelled eggs and bacon cooking along with some toast when I woke back up. I looked to see my mom and dad in the kitchen cooking. Well more Janine was cooking and Abe was putting toast in the toaster.

"Here, Rose." Abe laid a plate in my lap and I smiled. I ate slowly not wanting to really face the day.

"So I was thinking you and I could train some. Then we all go get dinner and see a movie." Janine didn't seem enthused when she said it but I smiled.

"Depends. Do I get to have a black eye again?" I asked and smirked at her.

"No, I promise." She laughed and Abe looked completely confused at which me and mom had to laugh even harder at.

She grabbed my plate after I was done and washed the dishes and I thought back to training with Dimitri and all the times it had gotten heated between us. I missed him and this was only the first day. I don't know how I'm going to survive the next 10 months.

She kept her promise of not giving me a black eye but did kick my ass but this time I gave her a few bruises to. We went to the movies but I didn't pay any attention to it.

What I'd done to Dimitri. Leaving him like that and without any good reasons had a pain in my heart that wouldn't go away and I thought about it all day.

We got home and I crawled into my bed and cried myself to sleep quietly so Janine and Abe wouldn't hear.

***So a lot of heartbreak. I think Rose is regretting her decision but she thinks it's for the best and she's not going to learn if she doesn't make a mistake. R&R and tell me how I did. Yunacarman I stayed up and thought out a chapter like you asked and I hope you liked it. This is just the beginning of the heartache.