A/N: Okay, this little shortie was a request made by FaithfulWhispers who wanted Ice Cream Kitty giving sass. This is probably the silliest one-shot I've ever written. It is written in as a parody to the youtube video that went viral in 2011 called "Crazy Nastya## Honey Badger". This is something light-hearted and terribly silly, so don't take it to seriously ;) Enjoy!

Ice Cream Kitty Don't Care

As we travel below to the New York City Sewers, we are greeted with the welcoming stench of stagnant water, fecal matter, and possibly a decaying corpse. Beyond the perfume a la derriere, is the quaint home of four ninja turtles and their rat sensei. Yes, it is quite peculiar….let's take a looksie!

Everyone seems to be chillaxin', doing their own thing. Oh, but wait.….what is this? A look in the kitchen reveals the rare species known as the 'Ice Cream Kitty'. Ice Cream Kitty is seldom seen outside of her beloved freezer, but today she has ventured out of the safety of her icy world for one thing and one thing only.

The laptop.

The portable computer is never seen without its purple-banded owner nearby, unless of course it was apprehended by the smaller freckled turtle, who left the prized possession idly on the kitchen table. Ice Cream Kitty purrs with delight. God bless that little orange cinnamon roll. From the comfort of her transportable icebox, Ice Cream Kitty wastes no time pawing at the keyboard. A sugary smile graces her face as her favorite multiplayer game appears on the screen.

A chocolate-vanilla paw slaps the keyboard with vigor. Look at her go! Those other players don't stand a chance. Oh, my….one of her teammates is being attacked by an ogre! She leaves that fool in the forest, cause Ice Cream Kitty ain't got time for deadweight.

While our ice cream gamer is slaying ogres like a boss, she doesn't see the tall menacing figure behind her.

"Mikey! What have I told you about letting your cat play on my laptop! It'll take me forever to get the clumps of strawberries from between the keys!"

"Meow?..." Ice Cream Kitty arches her strawberry brow at the tall purple-band turtle that's all up in her gaming space. She snorts. Nobody lets Ice Cream Kitty do anything. Ice Cream Kitty don't need nobody's permission, she does what she wants!

Oh snap! The tall turtle tries to take the laptop from Ice Cream Kitty, but Ice Cream Kitty ain't haven't none of that! She growls at the turtle, but wait….did that turtle just roll his eyes at her?...And he's still trying to take the laptop? That turtle done lost his mind.

Ice Cream Kitty starts hissing and swiping her wet paw at him like 'Don't you see I'm gaming, fool? You better check yo'self before you wreck yo'self!' Ha! That sassy threat was enough to make that Tall Turtle back the heck up.

Tall Turtle frowns at the chocolate scratch marks on his arm. You better watch it turtle, next time you won't be so lucky. Uh-oh, uh-oh!...what is this?...Is that a spray bottle in
Tall Turtle's hand?

Tall Turtle glares at Ice Cream Kitty like, 'Don't make me use this.' But look, Ice Cream Kitty is all chillaxed still gaming; she ain't paying that silly turtle no mind.

Oh..Ooooh!...He sprayed Ice Cream Kitty! Hm!...He's either stupid or has a death wish…maybe both.

And here we have a fierce battle between Ice Cream Kitty and Tall Turtle. I wonder what'll happen?

Ice Cream Kitty's like "MOAAR!" One minute she's gaming out and the next she's charging Tall Turtle's face Leeroy Jenkins style. She's all over that turtle like a wet rag…a wet rag with claws.

Look at that slow motion reel…. She just slapped the crap at that turtle…she did again…and again. Shoot, Ice Cream Kitty don't play! Ice Cream Kitty is crazy as heck when you mess up her gaming groove.

Tall turtle's like "Get her off me! Get her off me!" But Ice Cream Kitty don't care, she will turn that fool into a turtle popsicle. Ice Cream Kitty's beating the snot outta that turtle….she's all over his face, her tail gagging in his mouth….ew, Ice Cream Kitty, you just nasty. Ew!...She just bit him on the neck like a vampire cat. Nasty. But hardcore Ice Cream Kitty don't care.

That kitty is so cray-cray! She just keeps on mauling that turtle's face while he thrashes around the kitchen screaming like a pansy. That's right, Tall Turtle, you're a pansy. Oh my gosh, he just ran into a wall. Stupid turtle. Stupid turtle twitching on the floor while Ice Cream Kitty sits victorious on his face. Pansy Tall Turtle just got his butt kicked by Ice Cream Kitty.

Ice Cream Kitty drags her chocolate tail up the table and back into her little icebox. And she's still winning like a boss, cause Ice Cream Kitty is hardcore like that. Pansy Turtle is still lying on the floor whining about a brain freeze. But Ice Cream Kitty don't give a crap; she just gets more strawberry chunks stuck in the keyboard.

FIN

A/N: Silly Turtle, you know you can't handle Ice Cream Kitty, cause Ice Cream Kitty don't play that! :P LOL! Thanks for reading, leave a review!