Author's notes: Thanks everyone for the comments! I can't promise anything good, but I hope you'll enjoy.
"Alex, what am I going to do? I want to…no I need to make things the same as they were. I need to be there for Ruby, I need to be there for Lena…" Sam's eyes were brimming with tears.
"Sam, you can't make things the same as they were."
Sam looked up at Alex, tears falling down her cheeks.
"Sam, there's no way. You can't pretend that it didn't happen."
Sam's body wracked with tears.
"Sshh, Sam, I know you're stronger than you can even think." Alex held her. "And you have me. And Ruby. And everyone else..."
Sam sat stoically on the couch in her den. She held a glass of chilled pinot in one hand as she was going over financial data for L-Corp for what seemed like the hundredth time. Why that memory had popped in her head just now she wasn't sure, but she felt a strong surge of emotion – for the woman who provided her comfort when she had needed it most.
She also realized, with regret, that she hadn't seen that woman in two days since their kiss.
Although, if Sam hadn't seen Alex since their kiss, she definitely kept hearing about her. Ruby talked about Alex a lot, in fact, Sam was pretty sure she wasn't the only Arias with a crush on the agent.
Sam closed her eyes and was brought back to the morning. She was driving Ruby to school and Ruby was looking down at her phone, giggling manically to herself.
"Whatcha looking at kiddo?"
"Alex updated her Instagram!"
Sam had scoffed out loud. "Alex has an Instagram? I don't believe it."
"I told Alex to make an Instagram and to follow me!"
At Sam's laughter Ruby quickly showed what she had found so hilarious. Alex had uploaded a picture (that presumably Kara had taken) of herself holding Kara's new cat with the hashtag 'streakythesecond.' Both the cat and Alex looked grumpy and Sam couldn't help but laugh along with Ruby.
And then there was Ruby at dinner. Ruby had done well on her math test and was beaming in a way that made Sam happy.
"I can't wait to tell Alex! She's gonna be so excited!"
"You bet, kiddo," Sam had replied, beaming back at her daughter.
Sam opened her eyes and was once again brought back to the present. Alex hadn't even been there today, and Sam had felt so much happiness in heart because of her.
She really wished she hadn't kissed Alex like that. She had made it all awkward between them and now they weren't even texting each other.
A day later.
Alex gritted her teeth and cursed under her breath. She had made a serious mistake – what was supposed to have been a simple operation was ending badly and it was because she had incorrectly assessed the situation.
The task force she was in charge of was supposed to apprehend a reckless alien. What Alex hadn't anticipated was that the alien was a ruse for Cadmus to take out Supergirl. And somehow, beyond all circumstances, not only was Cadmus operating with Lillian Luthor in jail, the organization also had access to kryptonite.
Supergirl was currently on the ground in pain, debilitated by the kryptonite, Alex's team was dispersed, and vision was blocked by smoke bombs.
Alex knew she had to react fast. She yelled at her team to evacuate and took out an emergency weapon she and Winn had been working on from her tactical vest. The weapon was untested, and Alex hadn't planned on using it any time soon, but she supposed that if there ever was a perfect time to use it, it was now.
After her team had evacuated, she threw the weapon in the air towards Supergirl and covered her eyes with her arm. It was a yellow sun grenade, similar to J'onn's creation, but more concentrated and powerful.
The force of the explosion surprised her, and she felt her body jolt back. Alex distantly perceived that she was losing consciousness, and now all she could do was trust Supergirl.
As Alex blacked out, memories of Kara and Maggie flashed through her mind. But now, added to that, were memories of Ruby and Sam. Ruby's laughter…Ruby playing soccer. Sam smiling and joking around…how beautiful Sam was…Sam's lips on hers…
"What?" Sam was trying not to panic. She was on the phone with Kara learning that Alex had been injured on the job. Kara was trying to sound calm, but her strained voice belied her worry.
"Alex is being treated at the DEO right now. She got a pretty bad electric shock and went into cardiac arrest."
Sam could feel her stomach drop and her heart rate accelerating. What if Alex didn't make it? How would Ruby take the news? How would she, herself, be able to handle it?
"Thanks for telling me, Kara. I'll be there right away."
As Sam entered the DEO she was flooded with painful memories of her time being treated for Reign. But that wasn't what was important to her right now. What was important was Alex.
She was led by a uniformed agent to the DEO's medical bay where Alex was being treated. The agent nodded to her and left as she was greeted by Kara, J'onn and Winn.
"How's Alex?" Sam said. She could barely hear herself above the sound of her pounding heart.
"Thanks to Supergirl, she was given medical attention in time," J'onn said glancing at Kara. "Right now, we just have to wait for her to wake up."
Sam nodded through her tears, grateful for the update. "Can I see her?"
Alex stirred and groaned in her bed. What time was it? Was she hungover? She sat up and groggily registered that she wasn't in her apartment, but in the DEO's medical unit. That's right – she had blacked out after throwing the sun grenade. At least she hadn't drank like an idiot.
Alex looked down at her arms and saw bandages. Probably burns she surmised, but not so bad because there was no evidence of surgery. And, Alex guessed, she had knocked her head pretty hard because it felt like it had been trampled on by a dozen Kryptonians.
The table at her side contained a debriefing from J'onn which Alex read gratefully. The grenade had worked against the effects of kryptonite on Supergirl. Alex winced as she read that the DEO medical staff had to use a defibrillator on her. So, the grenade was more humanly lethal than she and Winn had thought. Alex briefly wondered what had happened to the Cadmus goons surrounding Supergirl.
No, she wasn't going to think like that. If Cadmus wanted to take down Supergirl, they knew that meant war.
That's when Alex heard soft breathing. She looked around and saw a sight that made her pulse quicken. Sam was sleeping in a chair in the corner of the room, still in her business attire, with her hair tied back, looking tired, but extremely beautiful nonetheless.
Alex was taken back to another time she had woken up in the DEO's medical unit. It was after she had been captured by a stalker and had almost been drowned. That had sucked, but what made it worth it was the seriously gorgeous woman waiting at her bedside.
"Sam," Alex whispered.
Sam murmured to herself but didn't awaken.
"Sam," Alex said a little bit louder, but still gently.
Sam started and opened her eyes. "Oh my god, Alex."
Sam rushed to her feet and came over to Alex's medical cot. Her eyes were red and bloodshot from stress and lack of sleep.
Alex smiled weakly. "Hi."
Sam tenderly held Alex's hand. "How…how are you feeling?"
"My fault…had to use some experimental biochemical weapon…fine now…" Alex tried to sound nonchalant, as if she had just gotten a scrape, but she didn't like how hoarse her voice sounded. She looked up at Sam's face and realized that the other woman had tears in her eyes.
"Alex," Sam accused through tears. "You almost died."
Alex had seen the tough woman cry because of Reign, because she was terrified for Ruby, but never because of Alex herself. The painful realization stung.
"Hey, hey…it's okay." Alex ignored whatever physical pain she was feeling and gently held Sam close to her.
"You…you…" Sam sputtered but couldn't finish her sentence.
"How long have you been here?" Alex asked quietly.
"Just a couple hours. Ruby's with Lena," Sam sniffled softly.
Another painful realization struck Alex.
"Does Ruby know?"
Sam shook her head. "Ruby knows you got hurt, but she doesn't know how bad."
Alex sighed into Sam's shoulder. Despite her guilt, it felt nice just holding the beautiful woman in her arms and hearing that Ruby was okay.
Alex knew her job was dangerous. Biotech weapons, deadly aliens, broken bones? That was just another day. Her and Maggie had an understanding between them – they both had dangerous jobs and they both knew that it was possible that one of them might not make it home that day. But even Maggie had been unimpressed by the mortality rate of a human DEO agent.
That's when Alex realized something. She had to live in the moment, even though it could potentially screw everything up, like it had when she had proposed to Maggie in the spur of the moment.
"Sam," Alex murmured. "I have to apologize for something."
Sam broke free from Alex's embrace. "For this? You better apologize." Sam's lips were almost upturned, but Alex had a feeling she was serious.
"For this, yes. But for how I was being selfish."
"Selfish about what?" Sam whispered.
"For shutting you out after we kissed." Sam suddenly froze.
"Look, I have feelings for you," Alex barreled on despite Sam's reaction. "I shut you out because I was scared. I don't know if you want to start something with me. I have a dangerous job, I messed up my last relationship, I might not be the most stable person ever...
But...I really like you Sam." Alex looked up at Sam gauging for a response.
"What are you saying, Alex?" Sam asked hesitantly, as if she was scared to hear Alex's answer.
"Maybe, one day, would you like to-would you like to go on a date with me?"
Sam's entire face suddenly lit up. "Yes, Alex Danvers, I would really like that." For the first time since Alex had seen her that day she was smiling
"G-great," Alex stuttered happily
"But please," Sam laughed. "Please focus on your recovery first."