Tonks' entire body hurt as she gasped for breath on the stone floor, quickly finding that even drawing air into her lungs was excruciating. Just as she'd made the decision to Summon her wand and duel the bastard standing over her, Avery had once again cast the Cruciatus Curse. She swallowed roughly around her aching throat, raw, she assumed, from the ear-splitting screams that she couldn't help but let loose. Not wanting to suffer the suffocating pain of Avery's curse again, Tonks reached out her hand to Summon her jacket. Fighting against the dizziness she could sense even with her eyes closed, Tonks took a breath and opened her eyes to find Avery's face close to her own as he knelt on the floor next to her.
"Don't you sound pretty when you sing," he said, his eyes alight with malice as he gave her an unsettling grin. "Anything you'd like to say after all that fun?"
"I already told you all I needed to say," Tonks whispered hoarsely, fighting back the panicked thoughts about Severus' absence. She trusted him, he would come—and if he didn't, she was strong enough to fight her way out.
Avery's smile broadened. "I was hoping you'd say that. You see, my colleague doesn't care too much for the way I sometimes get information," he began, grabbing Tonks roughly by one arm to roll her to her stomach. Tonks commanded her sluggish limbs to fight, but Avery had a definite size advantage—it took little effort for him to get her to where he wanted her, face down with one arm pinned behind her back. He leaned over her, his mouth resting by her ear and said, "But my colleague isn't here, so I'll do what I see fit."
Fighting to urge to vomit at Avery's words, Tonks reached out the hand he'd thankfully left free and thought fervently of having her jacket in her hand, saying the incantation slowly in her head so the jacket would slide slowly across the floor to her waiting fingers rather than attracting attention by flying through the air. Her hand searched for the hidden pocket, and she felt instantly soothed with her wand under her fingers, even if there was a layer of denim between her skin and the length of wood. Thankfully Avery had been too busy telling her lewdly about his plans to notice the small heap of denim inching its way across the floor.
If she'd had it in her, Tonks would have smiled at the spell that popped into her mind, but since she was currently pinned under the worst brute she'd ever encountered while he spoke of violating her, she settled for feeling victorious at the yelp Avery let loose when her spell took hold. It seemed that the witch's self-defense course Lucy had dragged her to after moving to London was proving more useful than Tonks had thought possible—if Avery's reaction to the Vice-Grip Jinx she was currently using on his bollocks was any indication.
He released her arm to grab her roughly by the hair, frantically shouting, "Finite!" His angry, desperate voice interrupted Tonks' moment of victory. "Lift this bloody spell, witch!"
"No!" Tonks cried, fighting once more against his grip. It was satisfying to know that, in the same way he'd used an unknown spell on her just minutes before, his Finite wasn't entirely effective against the spell she'd cast.
Avery straddled Tonks' backside and used his grip on her hair to lift her head. "It only gets worse for you, girl, if you don't do what I say."
"Your todger could fall off and I still wouldn't cancel the spell," Tonks yelled as she tightened her grip on her wand, a stunning spell on the tip of her tongue as a pair of black boots stepped into her vision. A wave of relief washed over her as she let her eyes travel up to see that Severus had entered amidst their struggle. "Took you long enough, didn't it," she said breathlessly before she could stop the words from tumbling out of her mouth. Tonks immediately realized her misstep and continued, "This idiot said his colleague would make him play by the rules. Tell him he'd better keep his trousers on, or I'll never release his bollocks from this spell."
Severus looked down at them with his usual impassive expression. "She doesn't seem to be taking kindly to your advances, Avery."
Tonks felt the toe of Severus' boot nudge her hand and she grudgingly released her hold on her wand, allowing him to push aside her jacket for the time being. She hated giving up the security of her wand under her fingers, but his arrival meant that they could hopefully go ahead with their plan. It was too early to give away that Avery had failed to actually relieve her of her wand.
Severus stared intently into her eyes and probed for just a moment before Tonks saw a fleeting look of approval in his eyes; he flicked his wand casually at Avery, still sitting on her back, who let out a short groan of relief and released his grip before clambering to his feet.
With her eyes closed, Tonks had no warning before a booted foot swiftly made contact with her body as she pushed herself to her hands and knees. Thankfully, Severus must have seen the blow coming, because while it succeeded in knocking the wind out of her, the Cushioning Charm he must have cast kept it from re-injuring the ribs Hestia had mended not long ago.
"Surely we would like our captive to be able to speak if we intend to interrogate her," Severus said as Avery made a sound of protest and Tonks fought to take a deep breath. "Your brutish tactics are in danger of making that impossible."
"The Dark Lord said I could use whatever tactics I found necessary," Avery snarled.
"The Dark Lord said you could have her once I had finished my task," Severus drawled. He conjured a chair and removed his robes before draping them over the back. "As I have yet to start my task, you'll have to wait your turn."
As Tonks struggled to catch her breath, Severus crouched and placed a hand under her chin, tipping her head to look up into his face. "Now, then," he began in a dangerously low voice that Tonks decided was even more frightening than the voice he'd used from her school days when a hapless student exploded a cauldron. "Piper Smyth—that isn't your real name, but very soon it won't matter, so we'll continue with that for now—my techniques may differ from those of my swine of a colleague, but I assure you it will not be pleasant."
Tonks let Severus pull her to her feet and stood before him as he looked down at her, his usual impassive expression exchanged for one of intense scrutiny. She nearly quelled under his gaze, but kept her chin raised in defiance even if she was unable to help the shiver that ran through her body—if she didn't know this was an act, she would be bloody terrified. As it was, now she knew exactly how he got away with fooling You-Know-Who week after week.
Severus jerked his head and Avery stepped behind her and seized her wrists, holding them tightly in his grasp and pulling her body close to his again. The proximity of him made her struggle once more until Severus drew his wand and held it under her chin.
"Legillimens," he murmured.
The invasion into her mind wasn't too unpleasant since she knew what was coming. They had practiced a few times in their preparations, Severus probing for innocuous memories: Tonks in a Potions lesson as he stood staring down his nose at her incorrectly brewed second year potion, Severus catching her after curfew on her way to the Hogwarts kitchen, Tonks being knocked on her arse by Mad-Eye during Auror training. This time, the memories weren't as easy to relive. He shuffled through the events of the evening thus far, starting with her standing in her bathroom as she willed her face to be that of Piper Smyth. She cringed inwardly as she momentarily glimpsed her time under torture before, as they'd planned, Tonks used her skill at defending herself against the Imperius Curse and determinedly pushed him from her mind.
"Well, well, it doesn't appear as if you know much at all," Severus taunted. "You've never been to an Order meeting, and your little foray at the Quill yielded little of consequence. The Dark Lord will be pleased. I do wonder though, have you met with Albus Dumbledore? Were you sent to spy on me? Legillimens."
The memories flew through her mind even faster this time, Severus seeming to be searching for something specific. Suddenly, she found herself watching the events of her last night at the Quill. She felt the trepidation all over again when she'd Apparated to her flat to find Remus waiting for her. Shocked that Severus would bring forth these memories and refusing to allow herself the humiliation of not only reliving it, but having Severus view it, Tonks gave a mighty heave with her mind and tried to push him out.
He held his ground and pushed the tip of his wand into the spot where it rested under her chin, thankfully skipping over the rest of that night and finding the memory of her argument with Remus in the drawing room. The sound of her hand coming in contact with Remus' cheek echoed through her mind and she pushed Severus from her thoughts harder than she had before, a grunt of effort pulled from her throat.
"No!" she shouted once she found her voice again.
Severus righted himself, Tonks' effort having pushed him back several steps. Keeping his eyes fixed on hers, this time not probing her thoughts, he closed the distance between them once more and held her chin in his hand.
"He is a fool," Severus said in a low voice, his face very close to hers.
They stared silently at one another for a long moment as Tonks caught her breath, fighting back tears and wondering if he was referring to Dumbledore for Avery's benefit, or referring to Remus. The intensity of his words and the lack of his trademark sneer told her he was speaking of Remus. She wanted to find comfort in the fact that he cared enough for her as a friend that he had an opinion on the situation, but she had to quickly push the thoughts away since she knew exactly what was coming next and she needed to be prepared, needed to stay focused.
Severus released her chin and turned, retrieving his robes from the back of the chair he'd conjured. "I believe I have gathered all I need—once I have gone, she is yours to do with what you'd like."
The time had come for them to complete their plan. Tonks closed her eyes and took a fortifying deep breath to combat her exhaustion. Avery was a large man, and their fighting had left her physically drained, and it wasn't over yet since she still had to manage to free an arm from his grasp so she could Summon her jacket. She was also beginning to realize they had pushed the bounds of what her magic could do; she hadn't held her morph that night for a long time in comparison to other missions, but holding it under distress was proving quite tiring. She only hoped she could hold it for a bit longer.
As Severus drew his robes around his shoulders, Tonks began to struggle against Avery's grip, determined to get one of her arms free from his grasp. He chuckled and held her close. Tonks praised Merlin for Avery's moment of idiocy as he released her arms, his preoccupation with putting his hands on her body allowing her the moment she needed to extend her hand and scream "Accio", her body too drained to perform the spell wandlessly as well as nonverbally. The endless hours of training that had honed her quick reflexes allowed her to have her wand in hand before Avery could even question why she'd Summoned the discarded denim jacket. With shaking hands, she directed her wand over her shoulder.
"Stupefy!"
Tonks was only distantly aware of Avery's body falling to the floor—her focus was now on the formidable wizard in front of her. The casting of the Stunning Spell was Severus' cue to turn and, even though her body was screaming its weariness, Tonks raised her wand to duel. In a different situation, she may have found the thought of a duel against an opponent such as Severus Snape in intriguing prospect—the heat in the room increased with the flying spells, and sparks erupted as they collided or ricocheted off well-timed Shield Charms—but at that moment she was simply ready for their night to be over. As she Shielded herself from Severus' seemingly impossibly quick attacks, Tonks was happy to note that, even with her limbs shaking and muscles burning with effort, she wasn't knocked on her arse immediately—his dueling matched the intensity of when Tonks had dueled two Aurors at once during training exercises.
Piper the barmaid, supposed Order member or not, would not be able to hold out against the likes of Severus for long. Tonks knew this, and so allowed the spell he'd cast—a Stinging Jinx if the quick jolt of pain and swelling was any indication—hit her abdomen and she fell back to the floor with a short cry before Severus advanced on her and cast the spell she fervently hoped she still had enough magical strength to end nonverbally.
Her airway suddenly swelled shut when the Asphyxiation Hex took affect. Willing herself not to panic—even knowing the spell was coming, the immediate loss of breath was terrifying—Tonks closed her eyes and brought both hands to her throat and concentrated on "Finite" in her mind. Although her weakened state didn't allow the spell to lift enough for air to pass as easily to and from her lungs as usual, it would do. When she opened her eyes, Severus' face loomed over her and she nodded her head minutely, telling him that she had been able to cancel the spell.
As he silently bent to recover her wand from where it had fallen to the floor, Tonks closed her eyes and morphed the color from her face as she'd practiced, giving her skin a sickly pallor with a bluish tinge around her lips. The quiet as he cast a modified Body-Bind Curse and Silencing Spell was welcome after the ruckus that had taken place since she'd entered the wine cellar. Knowing it was unavoidable, but dreading it all the same, Tonks heard Severus' boots echo through the room as he made his way to where Avery lay in a heap and revived him.
"If you'd relieved the woman of her wand as planned…" Severus' words scathingly reprimanded Avery as Tonks heard the shuffling of what she thought was Avery getting slowly to his feet. Tonks tuned out the rest of their conversation, concentrating on holding her morph and willing the rest of their plan to go without a hitch.
Perhaps she should have paid more attention to their words, because she missed Avery uttering the incantation for the Cruciatus Curse, only aware when the pain shot through her body once more. Her back arched off the floor from the force of the spell, but through the haze of pain, Tonks was glad for Severus' quick spell work that kept her from reacting. Her mind cried out in protest and Tonks was sure the pain would be bearable if she could only move. As it was, she was frozen and couldn't do so much as clench her fists to find relief. The footsteps Tonks heard moving toward her were heavy, not Severus'; she concentrated on listening for Severus' steps, hoping he was near, but was disappointed when she felt another spell touch her body. The relief she felt when pain didn't immediately flood her body was quickly replaced with panic when a burning sensation started in her feet and seemed to be slowly spreading to her ankles. Her muscles, her skin, everything the spell touched as it spread slowly up her calves felt as though it was on fire.
"Unlike you, I thoroughly tend to the tasks assigned me. I assure you she is dead," Severus said coldly.
"Just making sure it was a job well-done, Snape," Avery snapped.
The searing pain continued to slowly make its way up her legs, making her already-aching muscles scream in agonized protest. Tonks tried not to panic and hoped that Severus would know what it was that Avery had cast. She longed to escape the fiery pain that was threatening to take over her entire body as it moved up her lower limbs. Terrified, Tonks couldn't help but wonder if this was what it felt like to be burned alive. How long until the blistering pain became too much? How long until it made its way up her torso, to her lungs, her heart?
Severus' arms wrapping around her body as he lifted her from the stone floor gave her hope that she was at least safe from Avery, but provided little actual comfort; she had a feeling there was very little that would provide any comfort at that moment. The spell Avery had decided to bless her with refused to respond to any of her demands of "Finite" she shouted in her head, and if her body hadn't been under the modified Body Bind Curse, she was sure she would be convulsing. As it was, the tremors that were held at bay by the Body Bind made her body feel as though it was humming with the need to react—it was a decidedly terrible feeling. Scorching, shooting pain coursed through her lower body and she couldn't move, couldn't scream. There was no outlet. Distantly, she heard Severus argue with Avery and wanted to scream at him to light a fire under his arse and get them the hell out of there. But she couldn't do anything but wait as the blistering pain reached her abdomen.
"Go and report your failure while I dispose of her body."
Tonks would have breathed a sigh of relief—if she'd been capable—at the feeling of being carried a short distance before the feeling of Apparition carried her away. Even though they'd left the wine cellar, she knew she had to hold on just a little longer while Severus created a memory of disposing her body. Waves of nausea rolled through her as Severus went through his act and Apparated once more. Once she was unfrozen she would vomit.
She knew the moment they were in the clear because the sure, methodical movements Severus had used during their ruse quickly turned hasty as she vaguely saw her surroundings change to the shabby, but quite tidy sitting room of his home. The cushions of the sofa under her body were of little consolation, but a welcome change from the stone floor of the wine cellar.
Just as she predicted, the moment Severus lifted the Body Bind, she sat up suddenly and turned, spilling the meager contents of her stomach on the floor and over the toe of one of Severus' boots. "Gods," she said, gasping for breath as Severus cleaned her sick with a quick flick of his wand. "I'm sorry."
"Save your breath. Try not to speak," Severus said as he knelt next to the couch and helped her lie back.
His voice—usually so smooth and sure—held a tremor that filled Tonks with dread. Whatever spell Avery had cast, she had to believe Severus could reverse it. Tonks' entire body was shaking, and she squeezed her eyes shut against the torment the spell was inflicting. Severus' rapid, low incantations were nearly drowned out by the groan that Tonks couldn't help but let loose.
Severus halted his incantations and swore harshly under his breath. "Nymphadora, I need to see your face."
Tonks merely grunted in response, her breathing rapid and her lungs burning as trickles of sweat dripped down her face. Knowing he was right, that she needed to be in her natural state for him to begin to heal her and find relief, she concentrated and morphed her face to her own and hair to its natural brown, the act taking more effort than she'd ever needed.
Tonks felt the couch dip as Severus levered himself from the floor and she grabbed a handful of robes with a trembling hand, willing him not to leave her side, but unable to bring the words to her mouth. A low, tremulous moan was all she could manage.
"I must open the Floo," Severus said, grasping her hand. Tonks expected him to pry her fingers from his robes, but instead he clasped his hand around hers and held it tight. She opened her eyes at the sound of flames erupting suddenly and saw the room was bathed in firelight from the fireplace. "I need Poppy."
The look on Severus' face made Tonks nod, crying out in pain and pulling her hand away to let him stride to the fireplace across the room. To her surprise, he opened the Floo connection with Dumbledore's office and immediately returned to his position kneeling next to her rather than carry out the conversation crouched in front of the hearth.
"Send Poppy through immediately!" Severus bellowed, clutching Tonks' hand before he began touching the tip of his wand to various points on her body while muttering under his breath.
Tonks heard Dumbledore speaking to Severus, but could no longer focus on anything but her body, feeling like there wasn't a place where she didn't feel touched by flames. It hurt to move, it hurt to breath, and she could no longer hold back the scream that had been threatening since the Body Bind had been released. What started as a low sound deep in her throat quickly turned to a loud, piercing shriek of pain that made her already raw throat ache. A moment later, as the sound of Poppy Pomfrey efficiently casting Healing spells joined Severus' low voice, the pain overtook her consciousness.
.
Tonks groaned as her brain slowly emerged from sleep, regretting it immediately when the sound seemed to reverberate through her head, making the throbbing she'd become aware of the moment she was conscious even worse. Her limbs were heavy as she shifted her legs experimentally and decided that the effort to move was far greater than she wanted to put forth at that moment. Even if she'd wanted to move, the heaviness of the quilt atop her was a weight her body surely couldn't manage to overcome in her state. Rather than open her eyes and have to face the fact that she would very much need to force her body to move soon to tend to her toilet needs, Tonks settled for listening intently for any indication that she wasn't alone. She would need help getting to the loo.
The sounds of pipes creaking and water running above her told her that Severus was upstairs. It was oddly intimate: lying on his sofa—dressed in nought but her camisole and knickers under the thick quilt, it seemed—while he showered in the bathroom above. She couldn't help but feel that their friendship had shifted from its usual tentative nature to something more concrete after their ordeal the night before.
The shower switched off, and Tonks decided to grudgingly accept the fact that she was awake and opened her eyes, starting slightly at the sight of her old Head of House sitting in the armchair across from the sofa.
"Glad to have you back," Sprout said, the concern written across her features belying her merry tone. "Don't try to get up just yet," she continued as Tonks started to push herself up on her elbows. Sprout stood and said, "You've a number of potions Severus has ordered you to have right when you wake, and since that man is like a teething Venomous Tentacula in the morning—worse when he's not had any sleep, which seems often these days. I've a right mind to do what he says."
Despite the woman's protests, Tonks took a breath and pushed herself up after Sprout turned to pick up a small wooden box she assumed held the potions Severus—and probably Poppy—would insist she take.
When Sprout turned, she placed a hand on her hip, ready, Tonks was sure, to chastise her for moving. Before she could utter any admonishment, Tonks croaked out, "Loo."
"I'm afraid you can't get up for a wee just yet," Sprout replied matter-of-factly. "Not until I hear from either the man of the house or Poppy."
Tonks resisted the urge to flop back on the pillow after the effort it took to get to her current position.
"Now you're halfway there, I'll help you the rest of the way." Sprout reached down and grasped Tonks' elbow and helped her swing her legs over the edge of the couch, bringing the heavy quilt along to keep her legs covered.
The effort left Tonks slightly breathless. She rested her head against the cushioned back of the sofa.
Sprout sat on the coffee table and handed Tonks one of the small vials from the box, and Tonks tipped it back reluctantly.
"Don't suppose you could you do an old lady a favor and give up this Order nonsense, eh?" Sprout asked, her tone suddenly more serious as she handed Tonks the second vial.
Tonks huffed slightly then grimaced. "After last night, I might consider it." Her voice was fuzzy with sleep and hoarse from the strain to her throat the night before.
"As if I'd believe that, you stubborn girl," Sprout said with a snort. Tonks finished the last of the potions with a sigh and looked up to find Sprout watching her shrewdly. "Lupin spent the night in one of those awful chairs in Albus' office."
"Reckon that was uncomfortable," Tonks said, avoiding Sprout's gaze and attempting to keep her voice even at the mention of Remus.
Before Sprout could comment further, a creak from the stairs had her turning as Severus emerged from a narrow staircase.
"Good morning, Severus," Sprout said stoutly.
"Pomona," Severus returned, his voice rough from what Tonks was sure was lack of sleep.
"You're lucky, you know," Sprout said with a sly grin. "If you'd taken any longer up there I was going to go up and take a peek at your arse in the shower."
To Tonks' great amusement, it seemed that Sprout's knack for saying whatever inappropriate thing that came to mind extended even to Severus, who simply shot Sprout an impatient look and said, "I realize it is difficult for you, but show some decorum in my house."
Sprout chuckled and stood. "Don't let this one fool you, Tonks, he likes a good ribbing now and then."
"I merely tolerate your presence in return for your exceptional potions ingredients," Severus said as he approached Tonks.
As he draped his usual teaching robes over the back of the second armchair, Tonks wondered how many people got what she gathered was a rare glimpse of this side of Severus Snape: hair still damp from the shower, robes absent, and tolerating—at least somewhat, if the lack of hexes flying was any indication—playful teasing from a colleague. As he walked toward the couch, Tonks absently noted that the billowing robes he usually wore definitely completed the Potions professor persona.
"Poppy's cheesed off at you lot, you know," Sprout said. "Says she's going to Albus about all this—lot of good that'll do her, of course, but you know Poppy."
"By all means, tell her to speak to Dumbledore," Severus said as he stopped next to the coffee table and crossed his arms, glaring at Sprout. "Considering it was the old man himself who signed off on this mission, their conversation will be quite frustrating for her, I'm sure."
Sprout stood from her spot perched on the coffee table and Summoned her patched cloak from where it hung on a peg next to the front door. "Oh don't look at me like that, boy," she said as she pulled the cloak around her shoulders before patting Severus placatingly on the arm. "I know there's probably all sorts of top-secret information you two need to discuss. I'll be off so I don't miss Poppy at breakfast—she'll be heading this way to see after Tonks here, so be quick about your information. And I'll be back this evening to take you round to your parents," Sprout said as she bent down to pat Tonks on the cheek before bustling through the Floo.
"Is there nobody who's safe from Pomona?" Tonks asked as Severus took a seat in the armchair across from her.
Severus shook his head. "It took me many years to learn to tolerate her. How are you feeling?"
"Bloody knackered," Tonks said with a sigh as she settled further into the couch. "And starving as well."
"Between holding your identity as Piper, fighting, and the Healing, your magic was very drained. You are going to need a fair amount of rest and food, knowing you, over the next few days."
"Did it work?" Tonks asked softly.
Severus nodded. "The Dark Lord believes Piper to be dead, and he was pleased that I showed my unwavering loyalty to him by killing an Order spy. My hope is that when the Death Eaters from Azkaban rejoin the ranks, there will be very few questions over my loyalty. As an added bonus, the Dark Lord was less than pleased with Avery."
"Good," Tonks said, relieved that their effort—and her brutal confrontation with Avery—had worked in the end. "Speaking of Avery, where the hell were you? That wasn't easy, you know, fighting him off."
"I was held up by the Hogwarts High Inquisitor," Severus said, his lip curling with distaste. "Pity, I believe she will come into a bout of abdominal distress later this week."
Tonks chuckled weakly. "Serves her right."
"Poppy will bring you a full Hogwarts breakfast when I send her over," Severus said looking down at his hands before he continued. "Do you require anything else?"
"As long as there's croissants and bacon and coffee on the breakfast tray, I'll be all right," Tonks said, pulling the quilt over her shoulders and propping her feet on the coffee table. She watched Severus nod curtly, still avoiding her gaze and marveled at how uncomfortable he became when not putting forth his usual show of annoyance and sarcasm that everyone else saw—it actually showed how far they'd come from reluctant Order partners to actual friends, and it made Tonks smile. After all, how many friends did someone like Severus Snape have?
"It's all right, you know." At Severus' raised brow Tonks said, "To care for a friend, worry about them."
Severus' eyes met hers for a moment before he looked back at his hands. "It's been a long time since I've truly worried after a friend." He said the word 'friend' slowly, as if testing it to make sure the word worked coming from his mouth. "I find I am...unaccustomed to it."
Tonks' briefly wondered who Severus would be friends with. She was certain he wasn't anything more than grudging colleagues with the Death Eaters, and one usually had to play nice with their co-workers—toad-like High Inquisitors notwithstanding. That left his list rather short.
"Well, I'm sure you don't want to hear it, but thank you for looking after me last night."
With no acknowledgment of her thanks, Severus simply stood and pushed his arms through the sleeves of his robes. "I'll admit to a brief moment of panic in which I feared my life would be in danger from your mentor."
Tonks smiled. "You're afraid of Mad-Eye?"
"He is rather mad," Severus said as he strode to the fireplace and tossed a pinch of powder into the flames. "I don't believe he'd have taken kindly if permanent harm had come to you. I do not wish to cross Alastor Moody in a temper."
Tonks spent the remainder of the day—after Poppy had come through the Floo to bring her food and fuss over her while complaining about the ridiculous tasks Dumbledore put them up to—sleeping on Severus' sofa. She woke only twice: when a demanding owl sent sent by Mad-Eye pecked on the window long enough to finally wake her and drop its missive, and when Sprout turned up just before dinner. She was under strict instructions from Poppy that she was to use only minimal magic for a few days until her strength was back. No morphing, no Apparating, no spells more complicated than a Lumos. With those restrictions in place, Sprout Apparated her to her parents' house where Tonks happily partook in her mother's Shepherd's Pie and fell back to sleep immediately after dinner.
The following day was much the same; she slept, drank the potions Severus and Poppy insisted she needed, let her mother dote on her—luckily Andromeda didn't press for any details of the reason for her necessary respite—and stayed awake just long enough in the afternoon to write out her mission report to Dumbledore. Sleep was a welcome distraction from the fact that the full moon was that night and she was worried about Remus. Hurt and angry though she was, she couldn't help but let her thoughts wander to the time they'd spent together after the full moon the two previous months, desperately wishing their relationship hadn't suddenly turned to what was sure to be awkward moments during Order meetings and missions where they were paired together. She found herself dreading the meeting scheduled for the following night; if she wasn't supposed to meet with Dumbledore and Severus beforehand regarding the completed mission, she would consider skiving off entirely. As it was, she'd have to remind herself that Poppy had told her to limit her use of magic. Hexing Remus was certainly out of the question.
.
The following evening, Tonks opened the door to Headquarters, tetchy at feeling tired after Apparating and walking the short distance and wishing she'd be able to use Edith's Floo for her journey. She closed the door behind her and started when she saw Bill standing in front of Mrs. Black's portrait, weaving an intricate pattern over the closed curtains.
"Are you going to be the one to finally shut her up for good?" she whispered.
Bill stopped his spell work and turned with a smile. "At least for a little while. Nearly scared the pants off my dear little brother and made him accidentally jinx Sirius when she startled him on the way in. Lupin's putting him to rights."
Tonks furrowed her brows in confusion, ready to ask Bill when Percy the prat had decided to pull his head from his arse, when a different brother stepped into the hall, Sirius coming down the steps right behind him. A smile broke across her face as she took in the familiar stocky form and long red hair of one of her oldest friends. She couldn't help but charge through the entry hall, all but running toward Charlie as he returned her smile with a wide grin of his own. Flinging her arms around his neck, she felt her feet leave the floor as Charlie's arms circled around her and lifted her. With a great effort, Tonks willed herself not to cry as she buried her face in his shoulder.
"Gods, it's good to see you," Charlie said after he lowered Tonks to the floor. She winced and let out a small gasp as he tightened his arms around her battered body.
"Keep it quiet, Weasley, or you'll end up waking my mother again," Sirius said, standing on the lowest step and leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest.
Tonks swallowed against the lump forming in her throat and looked over Charlie's shoulder, past Sirius to see Remus standing half-way down the stairs, his eyes narrowed slightly as he took in the scene.
Charlie stepped back and held Tonks by the shoulders at arms' reach, looking at her with confusion as he saw tears forming in her eyes.
"All right?"
Tonks nodded and took a stuttering breath. "A bit tired after the mission I just finished, and…" She stopped to blink back tears. "Sorry I've gone all girly on you! It's just…nice to see a friendly face."
"You sure you're all right?" Charlie asked.
"Tired, is all?" Sirius said doubtfully.
Tonks opened her mouth to reply, but Bill spoke up from behind her, apparently done with the task of tending to the portrait. "Sit and have a cuppa with us, Tonks, before the meeting. We can fill you in on why this bloke's going to be around a bit," he said clapping Charlie on the shoulder.
"I have to meet with Dumbledore before the meeting," Tonks said, glancing up at Sirius, who looked to be in a foul mood despite the company in the house. "But tea after?"
"A meeting with the Headmaster, eh? Just like we're back in school," Charlie said with a smile. "It's a date. For tea, that is."
Tonks managed a watery smile before Bill lead Charlie down the stairs to the kitchen. She turned to find Sirius still standing in the same spot, watching her carefully as she approached the stairs. Not in the mood to talk, Tonks avoided Sirius' gaze and pushed past him to walk slowly up the stairs to the drawing room, ignoring Remus entirely.
With a heavy sigh, Tonks rested her head against the musty cushion of the sofa, grateful that it was still relatively soft even in it's neglected state. She allowed her eyes to drift closed as she waited for Severus and Dumbledore, willing her body to stay awake rather than drift back to sleep. Sighing as she heard the click of the door opening, Tonks opened her eyes, expecting to see Severus, but it was Remus that closed the door behind him and walked toward her.
Unable to help the rush of emotions that nearly brought tears to her eyes, Tonks looked down at her lap and swallowed roughly before saying, "I thought you'd be sleeping until just before the meeting started."
"I thought the same of you."
Tonks noticed the weariness of his voice, roughened with exhaustion from what she guessed was a difficult transformation the night before. She'd briefly thought of stubbornly showing up to help in what had been their ritual of massage and comfort after his last two transformations, but even if her body had complied in allowing her out of bed that morning, she didn't think she could have faced him.
"I slept for nearly two days, so I thought I'd give being awake a go," Tonks replied. "Why are you here? Mad-Eye said he relieved you of the mission I just finished, and Severus will be here soon with Dumbledore to make sure it's wrapped up all tidy-like."
"I'm here because Albus told me you'd be in here, and I...care about the well-being of my friends."
Friends.
The word was ugly and distasteful to Tonks at that moment; it made her want to throw it in Remus' face that she didn't need more friends. She had plenty of friends. She was tempted to tell him just that, but when she finally looked up to find him watching her, the words wouldn't come. A night sleeping in a chair in the Headmaster's office followed by the full moon seemed to have taken its toll—he looked awful, his skin pale and the circles under his eyes even more pronounced than usual. But beyond the exhaustion, beyond the pallor and lines of weariness etched on his face, his eyes showed anguish and misery. She wanted to scream, to ask why he was doing this. Why he was insisting that what'd happened, what they'd had, was a mistake when it was obviously torturing him as much as it was her. But her pride wouldn't let her. She wouldn't dissolve into floods in front of him or beg him to reconsider, or anything else daft.
"You could have let me know you were all right," Remus continued.
Tonks' gaze had returned to studying her hands, but flew back to Remus at his words. "I'm sure someone would have let you know if I had been anything but all right," she snapped. "Besides, Mad-Eye knew I was fine. You could have asked him."
Remus chuckled mirthlessly. "Mad-Eye and I aren't exactly on speaking terms at the moment."
"The way I heard it, you slept in the Headmaster's office all night, so I reckon you knew the situation quite well."
The silence stretched between them, heavy with unspoken words, awkward and tense. She kept quiet rather than point out the fact that if he hadn't abruptly ended their relationship, he would have been the first one to hear from her; she probably would have recovered at Grimmauld Place rather than her mother's house, giving Sirius a worthwhile task and spending the day with Remus. But why start a conversation when the finality in his words the previous week had been clear.
They both started when flames in the fireplace indicated an arrival and Severus stepped through. He stopped, his eyes settling on Remus before he crossed his arms over his chest and said, "Show yourself out, Lupin."
Unlike Sirius, Remus was always polite to Severus, but Tonks didn't miss Remus' lips tightening into a thin line and his clenched fists as he nodded before reluctantly turning for the door. He paused, his hand resting on the knob.
"Do you need anything?" Remus asked, looking over his shoulder.
Nothing you're willing to give me. Tonks looked away. "I'm fine."
After the door had closed behind Remus, Severus unfolded his arms and drew his wand. Without preamble, he kneeled in front of where Tonks was sitting on the sofa and began running his wand over her body in the now-familiar diagnostic spells she'd been subjected to numerous times in the past two days. Apparently satisfied with his quick exam, Severus reached into his robes and handed her a glass vial.
"No more bloody potions," Tonks grumbled before tipping the vial of turquoise liquid down her throat—just because she knew she needed it didn't stop her from complaining over the endless potions she'd taken for her injuries.
"Do stop complaining—that was your last dose," he said as he rose and walked to one of the armchairs. "Healing a spell designed to mimic the effects of being burned alive isn't exactly as easy as mending a broken bone."
Tonks fought the urge to stick her tongue out at him.
He arched an imperious brow. "Lucky for you I make it a point to always know what my enemies are working on."
At this Tonks did roll her eyes. "I already said thank you for your help."
Severus smirked. "Indeed, you did."
"I suppose you're finally rid of me," Tonks said with a small grin. "Now this mission's all done."
"I'm sure you'll talk Dumbledore into some other fool mission, and I'll have to endure your presence once again."
Dumbledore picked that moment to arrive for their report, but Tonks didn't miss the fleeting smile Severus quickly covered with a scowl.
Their report took long enough that the kitchen was filled with Order members when Tonks walked in. Aside from Severus' chair in the corner—which nobody ever challenged him for—the only seat available was her customary seat next to Remus. A quick glance at Sirius told Tonks that he was responsible for the arrangement. She scowled when he merely raised his eyebrows in challenge. Knowing the meeting was soon to start, and not wanting to draw attention or act like a petulant fifth year by moving the chair to a different location, Tonks marched to the spot and turned the chair to face the room.
The moment she sat, Remus leaned down, grasping her ankles like he always did, ready to pull her feet into his lap as was their usual custom at Order meetings. Realization seemed to dawn suddenly and he released his grip and sat up quickly.
'I apologize," he said.
All the hurt and anger and confusion Tonks had felt over the past week was suddenly too much to hold in. She knew she wouldn't beg him to reconsider their split, but staying silent was not something she could do any longer. She'd managed to suppress most of her feelings for the sake of her mission, but now the mission was over and, Order meeting be damned, she had to say something. She drew her wand from her robes, casting a Muffliato Charm.
"Apologize for what exactly?"
"I—" he began before shaking his head and settling back in his chair. "I'm not quite sure where my apology should start."
"Answer me this, Professor," Tonks said, turning her chair slightly and plopping her feet in Remus' lap rather more forcefully than necessary. "Did I happen to have a say in the matter when we shagged?"
Remus abruptly sat up to attention, casting a wide-eyed glance around the kitchen.
"Nymphadora—"
"It's Tonks, actually," she said with deceptive calm. "Well?"
"Well what?" Remus asked, looking around the kitchen again.
"Don't worry, I've made sure our conversation is private," she said with a roll of her eyes. "I asked if I had a say in the matter when we shagged."
"Of course," Remus whispered.
"So why haven't I got a say in this?" Tonks asked, pocketing her wand before crossing her arms over her chest.
Remus' eyes darted over Tonks' shoulder where Severus was sitting in the corner before his eyes swept behind him where Mad-Eye sat next to Kingsley. "Isn't this a conversation better suited for another time?"
"Why?"
"Because I don't care for the way Severus is looking at me."
Tonks looked over her shoulder and found Severus glowering at them, his arms crossed with his usual scowl fixed on his face. "He looks at everyone like that."
"Not you."
Tonks stared at Remus for a moment before slowly saying, "Because we're friends."
"You seem to have quite a few friends, the way I see it."
Tonks gaped at him for a moment before Charlie and Bill's raucous laughter filled the kitchen over the din of other conversations. "Just to be clear," she began, her voice tremulous with anger. "You're allowed to be jealous over my friends, and I'm allowed a say if we shag, but I don't get a say in whether you stick around or run scared?"
"I'm not running scared, I—"
"Bollocks," she hissed, noting that Dumbledore had made his way to his seat at the front of the room with his usual cup of tea and Molly was eyeing her shrewdly from where she'd been pushing mugs of tea insistently at various Order members. "You left in the middle of the night and gave me that rubbish excuse of your buggering sense of duty. If that's not running scared, I'll eat Buckbeak. And I deserve a say in this, damn it."
Tonks drew her wand and cancelled the Privacy Charm before sitting back in her seat with a huff. With a start, she realized that many of the occupants of the kitchen were eyeing her curiously. Even if the other Order members hadn't heard their words, Tonks was certain that it had been quite clear that her and Remus had been arguing.
"Are you ready to begin, Nymphadora?" Dumbledore asked.
"Sir?" Tonks asked, wishing she could morph away the color she could feel in her cheeks.
"I've called us to order and asked Mr. Weasley for the first report," he replied mildly. "Unless there is something you wish to discuss first."
She sensed no real rebuke in Dumbledore's tone—in fact, rather than the stern look she was expecting when she looked more closely, his eyes held a sparkle of mischief. Tonks looked briefly at Remus, now staring at his shoes with an expression that was in danger of lighting them on fire as he flexed his fingers over the laces of her boots still resting in his lap. His anger incensed her. If he was so angry and jealous, why the hell had he ended their relationship anyway?
Still aware of the eyes on her, Tonks took one last look at Remus and said, "Remus here was arguing that the meeting tonight would be over quickly—before it had even begun, really," Tonks said. Remus was watching her warily and Tonks fixed him with a determined stare. "I was simply telling him he was quite wrong."
Remus held her gaze for a moment before looking down, tightening his grip on her boots. The slight upturn of his lips told Tonks all she needed to know—regardless of his words, he didn't want her to give up.
And there was no way she would.
A/N: And so, my wonderful readers, "Jinxed Hearts" has come to an end. I hope you are satisfied enough with the ending that you'll want to pick up where we left off here with the next story, titled "Friends to Lovers: There and Back Again". I won't promise a date for the first chapter since you all know by now that my life five kids tends to get in the way of writing, but look for it in the next two weeks. To tide you over, check out my series of short snippets into Remus' thoughts with the new story, "Ungentlemanly Thoughts of a Gentleman", which will be updated while you patiently wait for the new story—as soon as the new story is published, I will announce it in the author's notes:).
Thank you to everybody who has read, followed, favorited, reviewed, lurked—I'm so glad you all enjoyed the story! Thank you most of all to my beta, Kerichi. Once upon a time I happened upon her stories and reviewed. We chatted, and I confessed that I would love to write but didn't know where to start, and she graciously offered to beta for me. She patiently (and probably excruciatingly in the beginning) helped me with sentence structure and direct address commas, and a year and half later still helps me understand why my adverbs don't need adverbs of their own. With her encouragement I've not only finished this story but participated in the NaNo project and now have submitted two non-fiction pieces for publishing. Even with hundreds of miles between us and all of our communication of the electronic sort, I know I've gained a friend.
I hope you enjoyed yourself while reading and be sure to stay tuned for what's to come!