A/N: Dun, Dun, Dunnn! The interrogation begins (or continues), LOL.
Betad by the lovely Michelle Renker Rhodes.
Most characters belong to S. Meyer
Chapter 23 – Frankly, Mr. S, I Don't Give a Damn
EPOV
I meet and hold Bella's father's gaze.
"It was a bit more…involved than my just dumping Mel on your daughter," I respond.
"Weren't you concerned about leaving Mel alone for that long?"
"Oh, I wasn't alone," Mel pipes in. "Bella and Angie were always there with me. Bella even gave me extra dance lessons for free while we waited. Well, now she gives them to me all the time while she babysits me. Bella says that next year, I might be ready for competition classes!"
"Babysits you," Charlie drolls.
"Well, not babysits me," Mel chuckles, "cuz I'm not a baby. She watches me while Uncle Edward's at…work."
The entire time, I sit there with my teeth clenched hard.
"Mel, guess what?" Sue interjects. "When Bella was about your age, well, actually she was even younger than you, I used watch her while Charlie was at work. Didn't I, Charlie?" Sue asks, raising a brow his way.
"Hm," Charlie mutters in response.
"Really? That's so sic! You sure don't look or act like a stepmom."
Sue laughs. "What does a stepmom look and act like in your mind?"
I listen to the rest of their conversation where Mel describes her grim picture of a stepmom. Bella and I share furtive glances across the table. I take another bite of my food, but I'm having trouble swallowing.
"See, I could've never done that."
I put my fork down and can't quite manage to hold back the snort that erupts because yeah, like it wasn't obvious that he wasn't going to just let that shit drop.
"When Bella was that age, I had to know where and with whom she was with at all times." He cuts into his lasagna with a lot more energy than necessary to simply slice through pasta and ground meat, knocking a few pieces of meat off the plate and onto the clean table. "And I knew Sue well by then. I could've never left her with someone I barely knew."
Bella sets her utensils down. "Edward knew me very well by then too, Dad, and it's not like I was going to kidnap her."
"How could he have known that?" Charlie questions, chewing on his dinner before looking at me. "Son, you've gotta be careful with kids nowadays." He points at me with his fork. "You've got to be responsible."
"Edward is very responsible," Bella replies evenly, but I can hear the fire brimming underneath.
"Everyone has a different method of parenting, Charlie," Sue says.
"Some things should never change on principle," Charlie insists.
"Well then, I guess Mel and I couldn't have lucked out any more than we did because your daughter is the epitome of responsible. Perhaps if I'm lucky enough, some of that responsibility will actually rub off." I smirk.
His eyes flash. "Depending a whole lot on her, aren't you?
Asshole.
"Yeah, I am."
OOOOOOOOOO
Once dinner is done, we all clear the table and clean up the kitchen, and Bella and Sue make coffee while Mel, Charlie and I hang around the living room. I stand by the mantle, hands deep in my pockets while I look at the pictures of Bella as a young girl and listen to Charlie and Mel's conversations, praying that Mel doesn't serve up any more rounds of ammo for Bella's father. He's asking her about school now, which I guess is a safe enough topic. Mel can't stick her petite little foot in her mouth too much with that one; as far as I know, I get her there on time, and last I checked she was doing much better. As long as he doesn't ask about school monitors or fuck buddies, we should be good.
Finally, Sue walks in with a tray of coffee mugs, followed by Bella. She makes her way directly to me with a reassuring smile, wrapping her warm hand around mine.
"You okay?" she mouths.
I nod, and despite everything, as soon as she's near me, it's true. Leaning into her, I nuzzle my nose against her neck and breathe in her honey skin, feeling her warmth, taking comfort from it. She squirms and giggles quietly, and yeah, she's worth this suffocatingly shitty evening.
Sue hands a mug over to Mel.
"Oh, uhm…I'm not sure if she should be having coffee," I say, and look to Bella for confirmation because I don't know, maybe she can?
"It's alright, Edward," Bella smiles. "Sue made Mel hot chocolate with marshmallows and whip cream."
"Ooh, thank you!" Mel cries, beaming at her mug. "This looks so sweet!"
"It's my daughter's favorite as well," Sue smiles at her indulgently.
Bella holds up her own mug of hot chocolate in illustration. "See, she made me one too!"
I grin. "Yeah, Bella does love her chocolate."
Bella's cheeks redden, she squeezes my hand and gives me a private look through her long eyelashes, and I know that like me, she's remembering our long weekend alone together.
"She sure does love her chocolate," Sue says, handing me a mug of coffee. She leans in and whispers, "But that was very responsible of you to speak up like that." And winks.
It's decided: No matter what my final thoughts will be on Bella's father tonight, her stepmom has already won my undying respect.
OOOOOOOOOO
We talk some more, though both Sue and Charlie seem to gush all over Mel, and she's eating up all the attention while Bella and me share secret glances because seriously, who knew what a ham she was?
"Edward…I hear you and Charlie actually work together," Sue comments.
Once again, silence.
"We're on the same site," I respond noncommittally.
"I've also heard that your crew might be bidding on-"
"Sue, Sweetheart, you know we don't discuss that stuff at home, especially when Bella's visiting. We see her so little as it is; no point in wasting time on work talk. Besides, I'm sure that Edward understands that discussing all that might seem like a conflict of interest once the bids are in."
"I agree. I have no interest whatsoever in discussing any of that outside of the workplace."
He meets my stare.
"Well, either way, Edward," Sue smiles, "I wish you the best. My husband has always been a very fair man, and I don't expect that to change anytime soon. Correct, Charlie?"
"Yeah," Charlie mutters morosely.
"Good," Sue grins. "Okay, so who's ready for dessert?"
OOOOOOOOOO
"Hey, Bells," Charlie says during cheesecake, "you ever decided what you're going to do with the studio, and with that space in the back you wanted to turn into another dance room?"
"I've been giving it some thought," Bella responds.
"You're going to do work on the studio, Bella?" Mel asks.
"I'd like to," Bella smiles. "I think it needs some color, and you know that wall where you girls sit; the one with that ledge? I was thinking we could put some lockers along that wall."
"That's a great idea!"
"And I wanted to break through a couple of walls to make one huge room for the competition classes, and maybe-"
"Well, I've got a lot on my plate right now, but maybe in a few months we can-"
"I can work on it for you," I say.
Bella looks up at me. A huge smile lights up her beautiful face. "You can?"
"Of course I can, Bella," I shrug. "I mean, it'd have to be on weekends mostly; during the week…you know, I've got...that…other…why haven't you just asked me?"
"I didn't want to just- but Edward, are you sure?" Bella says. "You've got so much going on too…"
"Bella, I can do it."
"Okay, we'd have to discuss payment though."
"Bella," I groan. I look around the room because I really don't want to get into this discussion here, like I'm going to let her pay me after all the shit she does for me.
"Okay, okay. We'll talk about it later." And then she bites her lip, grinning and bouncing in her chair.
The more I think about it, the more I like the idea. Not only would I be spending time with her, but I'd actually be doing something useful for her. It'd be a way to repay her for everything she does for Mel and me. What's more, it would keep me busy, which always helps with the craving.
"You'd have to check with Eli."
Bella stops bouncing in her seat and whips her head over to her dad.
"Charlie!" Sue hisses.
"Now why would she have to check with him?" I question through clenched teeth, fury barely controlled.
"Look, he's her business partner, like it or not."
My nostrils flare. I shut my eyes tight, trying to find my control, my serenity fucking now, but before I lose it, I hear Bella speak up.
"Yeah, Dad, he's my business partner, but when we opened the studio, he agreed to be a silent partner, and we agreed that I'd run the business the way I saw fit."
"Alright, well, I'm just stating a fact; that's all," Charlie says defensively. "No need for anyone to lose their head."
He looks at me, and I look at him, and I'm having a hard time remembering that this is Bella's father.
After that, conversation is pretty stunted to say the fucking least; though Sue does her best. The man doesn't deserve that woman, that's all I'm saying, and I'm fucking ready to go. Thankfully, Bella seems to be on the same page. She stands up and starts talking about how it's getting late, and she's got things to do tomorrow.
"Izzy, Sweetie," Sue says carefully, "before you leave, I was wondering if we could discuss the plans for Thanksgiving?"
Bella sighs, looking from her stepmom to her father and then to Mel and me.
"I'm not really sure yet, Momma, I'll have to get back to you."
"Bella?" Mel says.
There's a note of confusion in Mel's tone. I know Bella hears it because she looks at Mel with eyes full of concern.
Mel and I haven't celebrated a holiday since her parents died. We haven't even discussed Thanksgiving. I've been avoiding it honestly, wishing the god damn day would never come; though Rose keeps reminding me about it and insisting that the best thing for Mel is if we keep things as normal as possible.
"Well, Bella will be coming here the way she always does," Charlie says. "It is a family holiday after all."
Mel drops her head and sucks in a fast breath. The only thing that keeps me from lunging over the table and knocking Swan the fuck out is the fact that unbelievably, he is Bella's father.
As it is, my vision tunnels and turns bright red. I've got to duck my head because it starts spinning.
Bella sucks her teeth angrily. "Dad, Jesus, come on…"
"I…uh…" Charlie scrambles for something to say. "I just meant…"
Mel pushes away her plate with the half-eaten cheesecake.
"May I use the bathroom?"
"Of course, Honey," Sue replies. "It's down the hall to the right."
"Thank you."
When she gets up and rushes off, Bella glares at her father.
"You know, Dad? I can't even believe you went there." She pushes her chair back and goes after Mel.
"Bella!" he calls out. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it that way…aww, damn!"
I glare down at the table, my chest heaving, and push my chair back. "Excuse me, please."
Serenity fucking now…
OOOOOOOOOO
We're by the door, finally saying our goodbyes. Mel is gripping on to Bella's hand so tightly Bella's knuckles are turning white. They spent fifteen minutes in the bathroom together.
"Sue, I don't know what's going on for Thanksgiving. I'll have to get back to you."
"Of course, Izzy. You just let us know either way. And Edward, Mel and you are obviously included in that invitation."
"Thank you, Sue," I say with genuine gratitude. "I know that my sister wants us with her that day, but Bella and I will discuss it."
Sue smiles softly, but I think she knows that there's no way in hell I'm spending Thanksgiving with her husband.
I thank Sue once again for her hospitality and instruct Mel to do the same. Charlie gives Bella a hug, but she's stiff in his embrace, and despite everything, I feel like shit now. Bella loves her father deeply, I know that much, and I don't want to cause trouble between them. Not because I give a fuck about him, but for her sake.
While I help Bella get her coat on, I watch Sue give Mel a big, motherly hug, whispering something in her ear. Mel smiles and nods, and then Sue tells her she hopes to see her again really soon.
Mel reaches around and hugs her in return.
Charlie stands awkwardly in front of Mel. "Uh…well…"- he clears his throat – "Keep on doing what Bella tells you with that dancing and the makeup, and take care of yourself."
"I will," Mel smiles.
"And it was good meeting you."
"You too, Mr. Swan."
"You can call me Charlie."
"Okay, Charlie."
It's pretty obvious that he's feeling a whole lot of remorse for what he said before. I'd feel smug if his remorse hadn't come at Mel's expense.
When both women walk out the door, I give him a curt nod without waiting for one in return.
OOOOOOOOO
I open the passenger side door for Bella and help her in, and open the back door for Mel. Then I walk over to the driver's side, turn on the ignition, and pat down my pockets.
"I forgot my hat. I'll be right back."
"You want me to come in with you?" Bella offers.
"Nah. I've got it."
She nods and starts fiddling with the truck's heat.
OOOOOOOOOO
When Sue opens the door, she's holding my hat in her hand.
"Thanks."
"He's downstairs in the basement," she supplies.
I nod and move towards the white door leading downstairs.
"Edward?"
"Yes?" I reply, turning around.
"I understand why you need to talk to him, but just know that it's not you. He's always held on too tight."
"He didn't seem to hold on that tight when Eli was her man," I sneer.
"Eli…was…is…an ass-kisser," Sue snorts. "Always says what Charlie wants to hear; always shows Charlie his shiny side; lavished my daughter with a lot of crap. But she was young. Charlie was a young dad, much like you. He wasn't sure what he was doing, so he sheltered Izzy from everything just to be on the safe side. See, they had it hard when she was a little girl. I don't even think she remembers how hard. Still, you'd think he'd understand better, right?" she chuckles. "Anyway, it's not an excuse, and it's more than we can get into right now, but I just wanted you to know that it's not you. You hang in there with her. He'll come around. I may not have given birth to her, but Izzy's my baby too, and what she deserves isn't materialistic bullshit that'll leave her empty inside, but someone who'll fill her soul, someone real, and once Charlie gets his head out of his ass, he will see that."
I want to kiss this woman, and though they're not blood-related, I see from where Bella learned to love and be tender, and yeah, to be so damn feisty. I see it clearly.
When I reach the basement, Charlie is standing by a blaring sawing machine. He pushes a three by four through and curses when it doesn't come out right on the other end. I clear my throat more than once before he finally turns around.
He sees me, gives me a once over, and turns around to turn off the machine and remove his goggles.
"I'm not discussing that bid with you if that's what you're here for. I'll be fair, but that's all I can promise."
I chuckle humorlessly. "I think we both know that's not what I'm here for."
He turns around.
"I know you don't like me, and I really don't give a damn about that. Still, you're Bella's father, so regardless of what I feel, I will respect you. Now I don't know if Bella's discussed it with you, but I wanted to make it clear that the reason I'm taking care of Mel is because her parents aren't around any longer."
"Son, I didn't mean to hurt her feelings when I talked about Thanksgiving and family. I wouldn't stoop that low. She's a good kid. Reminds me a lot of Bella. I'm sure you can understand…I just want the best for my daughter."
"We're agreed on that much at least, and I know we'll agree that I've got a way to go to be the best for her, but make no mistake: I'm working on it. In the meantime, I'm not going anywhere, Mr. S. As for Mel, I'm sure you didn't mean to hurt her feelings, but how you protect Bella is how I protect my niece. I don't know how often you and I will have to be in each other's company from now on, so I'll ask that before you make a comment meant for me, you please consider my niece's feelings first. She doesn't need to pay for our differences."
He nods tersely and then stares at me.
"I know what you see when you look at me."
"Son, you have no idea what I see when I look at you."
"Yeah, I do. But she's willing to give me a chance, and I'm not going to give that up. Not for you, or your bid, or anyone or anything. She and Mel…they're my life, and I'm not going anywhere Mr. S, not as long as she's willing to keep me around. Have a good night."
And I turn around and climb back up the stairs.
OOOOOOOOOO
Bella and Mel carry on most of the conversation without me on the ride back to Brooklyn, but I catch the worried glances Bella keeps giving me. It upsets her when I wordlessly mull things over, I know that, but my head is crowded with so much shit right now, and lashing out and drinking are the only ways I've ever really known. Neither is an option anymore, not to the man I want to be for Bella and Mel. So until I can figure out the shit in my head without saying or doing things I'll regret, I'm stuck with silence.
Like this situation with her father…and Eli…I've got to get past this; I know I do. I'm just not sure how.
When we arrive at her place, I park and walk over to her side to help her out.
"Are you coming up?"
"Nah, it was a long day. I think I'll just head home."
She nods, but I can see the disappointment in her beautiful face. The thing is, I know I'd be shitty company tonight and probably end up making things worse.
She swallows and dips her head, peaking inside the truck. "Night, Mel."
"Night, Bella. Will we see you tomorrow?"
She shrugs and looks up at me.
"I'll call you in the morning."
She nods again, her features impassive, and then with no other words, I walk her to her door. She kisses me without meeting my eyes before walking inside.
OOOOOOOOOO
I stare at the bathroom cabinet while the shower runs, and don't sleep a lick that night.
OOOOOOOOOO
The next morning, before Mel is up, I walk down to the corner Deli and pick up a pack of cigarettes, a half dozen bagels and a tub of cream cheese. Then I have a quick smoke.
Mel is lying across from the TV in her pajamas when I get back upstairs.
"Get dressed."
OOOOOOOOOO
Bella is still in her own pajamas, a pair of sweatpants and one of her little tank tops, when she opens the door, and God, I remember lying in bed with her, and she wore nothing but her bra and panties, and I've never wanted anyone as much as I want her in every way: physically and emotionally. I want to be completely inside her; in her head, in her body.
I'm thinking all these things while she looks at me, her eyes growing wide in surprise.
"Edward, I didn't know you were coming…"
"We brought bagels," I say. "You cook for us during the week, this is the least we can do on a Sunday morning."
Her eyes glisten wetly, and she wraps her arms around me, kissing my neck. "Thank you," she whispers. "Come inside! Come on, come on!" she grins, pulling away, and she looks so fucking relieved that I feel like shit again.
How many times will this woman take my crap before she gets tired and gives me the fucking boot?
"Take your shoes off, get comfy, watch TV," she breathes excitedly, "and give me a minute because I've got to go brush my teeth!"
I chuckle as she runs off.
"Go get the bagels ready," I tell Mel, jerking my chin towards the kitchen. "You know how to work the coffee machine?"
"Dude, it can't be rocket science," she rolls her eyes.
"Alright then, Smart-Ass. Black, no sugar for me, quarter cup of milk and two and a half sugars for Bella."
"Sure." And as she walks off towards the kitchen, I make my way to Bella's bedroom.
Bella jumps in surprise when she emerges from the bathroom and finds me sitting on her bed. I extend a hand towards her and she takes it without hesitation, fitting her warm self between my legs and kissing me.
"I missed you last night," she breathes, brushing her lips over my neck, making me groan quietly. "I was going to ask you and Mel to stay…"
"I'm sorry, Bella. I had to…think."
She nods, her mouth slowly trailing up to mine. "Edward…" she sighs, "I'm sorry about yesterday and my dad and the entire Thanksgiving fiasco. If I would've known he was going to be such an ass, I would've never put you or Mel-"
"Stop." I kiss her hard, sucking on her sweet lips, and I remember holding her body against me that night we spent together, kissing her all night, feeling her warmth pressed up against me.
I hold her chin in my hand and lock her in my gaze. "I'm behind the eight ball with your dad."
"Edward-"
"And I don't care. I'm sorry, but I don't."
"I don't care either," she claims defiantly.
"Good because last night I realized that I shouldn't have expected anything other than how he acted towards me. I'm really not good enough for you."
"Edward, stop. Stop with this-"
"Bella, no. It's not even…" I take a peek across the hall. Mel is frowning at the coffee machine, trying to figure out how to put the filter in.
I fit my hand behind Bella's leg and guide it up, folding it around my thigh before doing the same with the other so that she straddles my lap, and fuck, she's so warm right there. Instinct makes me grind against her, and she presses herself in deeper. I want her so bad I can barely see straight. She whimpers, biting my neck to keep it low. Maybe next time we're alone…
My mind is wandering. I grip her hips, stilling her movements and mine, and wait for her to meet my gaze.
"Last night, after I got home, I lay in bed and thought of you, and of us, and I put myself in your father's place. I pictured Mel a few years older: this beautiful, smart and talented…daughter. Only daughter. It's natural a father would want the best."
"And what's the best?" she sneers, her arms wrapped loosely around my neck. "Someone with money? Someone who owns stupid shit? Someone who pretends to be something he's not?"
"I'm talking about what your father wants for you. Security, and I can't offer that right now.
"Edward, I don't care-"
"Bella, I don't have much, and you know this. My best chance at doing better for myself and for Mel rides on your father right now," I snort. "I don't own shit other than my truck and the clothes on my back, and I can't pretend to be something I'm not. I can't kiss ass. That's just not how I'm made."
"And I love…that about you."
"Again, good," I chuckle. "I respect your father, Bella. I do. I respect him for the business he's built, and I respect him for the beautiful, wonderful, perfect daughter he brought up."
"Edward, I'm not perfect."
"You're perfect for me," I tell her, kissing her forehead. "And I'm going to try my fucking best to be good enough for you. I'm not going to give you up because your father wants someone better for you. What I am going to do is be the best man I can be for you and Mel, and that includes doing my best to get that contract, and not touching a drop of liquor, and taking care of you both the only way that I know how."
She's got tears in her eyes. One slides slowly down her cheek. I put my mouth on it before it can slide off.
"Don't cry, Baby," I whisper, brushing my lips against her soft cheek. "That's not what I wanted."
She nods and smiles, but the tears keep falling. "Edward, you already are the best for me. I…I need you so much. I want you so much, Edward."
"I want you too, Bella. God, you have no idea…"
With another peek into the kitchen, I mold her to my chest, letting her feel how my heart pounds for her. Dropping my hands to her backside, I push and let her feel my want, my need. We kiss and rock, muffling our groans against shoulders and lips.
"We'd better stop," I pant, "I don't think it's a good idea for me to come in my pants right now with Mel in the other room."
She chuckles quietly and looks up at me.
"Edward…I was thinking last night too…I want to meet Carlisle, your sponsor."
I search her eyes.
"Bella, when I spent the night here, you had a couple of bottles of wine around, a few beers in the fridge, champagne glasses, wine glasses. Where'd it all go?"
She swallows. "Is that what you were looking for yesterday?"
I nod. "I noticed they were missing. Why?"
"Because," she says, as if her reasons should be clear – which maybe they should be, but I want to hear them anyway. "I…why should I have that around?"
"I don't want you reorganizing your home and your life for me."
"Why not?"
"Because I have the drinking problem, not you."
"That makes no sense, Edward. I've been doing some research. You have it, but if we're going to make this relationship work, it's something that we have to deal with together. A lot of the info says it would be a good idea if I went to a few meetings with you."
I draw in a deep breath and look up at the ceiling because the words are on the tip of my tongue and I want to make sure I say them without sounding like an asshole - again.
"No, look at me," she insists, guiding my head back down so I'm forced to meet her gaze. "Yes, you have the drinking problem, but if I can help, even in a small way, why shouldn't I?"
"Just answer me one thing, Bella: Did you get rid of it all because you're worried that I'll go rummaging through your cabinets and sneak a drink?"
"No." She holds my gaze. "You've given me no reason not to trust you, Edward, but at the same time, I know nothing about how this disease affects you specifically, not the public in general. If you ever do start drinking again, how do I help you?"
"Bella, that's not something you have to-"
"I'd like to meet Carlisle. Please."
"I…alright. Alright."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," I smirk because I know she's not going to let it drop.
She smiles and brushes her mouth against mine before pulling away hastily because we both know how quickly we can get carried away.
"And since you seem to be in such a…receptive mood this morning, I want to tell you that I understand if you and Mel have other plans, but I would've loved to have spent Thanksgiving with you. Here."
I draw in a deep breath and let it out slowly because I seriously have no clue what I did to deserve her.
"I do want to go see my sister for a bit, but then…Mel and I can come back here…if you're sure…"
She wraps her arms around me tightly, squealing into my neck, and when she looks at me, I want to tell her that this addiction has become so much more than any addiction I could've ever imagined. That I haven't pulled out that bottle in the bathroom cabinet for a couple of weeks now.
And it's because of her.
I want to tell her that I love her.
But when I tell her, I want it to be perfect. I want to be able to enjoy it, to savor the words, not to rush through it because my niece is losing her patience with the coffee machine and is about to pounce in here at any moment.
"So how about we do this," she says excitedly. "You go to Rose's for a bit because I think it would be good for Mel to have something from her past Thanksgivings…but then…maybe we can start a new Thanksgiving tradition. You, Mel, and me…together."
I gaze into her deep, bottomless eyes, so full of her warmth, and I realize that I can't even speak; I couldn't form any words right now if I tried.
And I don't care what anyone thinks. I don't care whose tests I pass or fail. I don't care who thinks I'm not good enough because no one will ever take her away from me.
So instead, I press my mouth to hers and let her feel my love.
A/N: Thoughts?
So who loves Sue?
As for Charlie…we'll see how he develops. :)
I want to apologize for how long it's been since I've been able to get back to reviews, but at this point, it's either respond to reviews, or write. As soon as I get a breather, I WILL try to respond to reviews though. :)
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