A/N This is going to be a little long, so feel free to skip this author's note and get right to the update if you don't want to read.

My apologies for not posting yesterday. As you might have heard, Toronto was hit by a bad ice storm and I was without power for almost three days. I wasn't staying at home during that time so that's why this chapter is a day late.

Now, in regards to the last update: I guess I was wrong, not all reviews make my face do this :)

I want to extend a sincere thank you to all of you who took the time to let me know that even though things aren't happy right now, you still want me to continue with this story. I really can't tell you how much I appreciate that. Whether one person or tons of people review any of my fics, my goal is always to try and write something that rings true - even with the parts that aren't light and fluffy.

I know that a lot of you are mad at Spencer (and me) for what is going on in the fic right now, but all I ask is that you trust where I'm going with this. I promise my goal is not to just write unhappy Spashley times for my own amusement.

I hope you all had a very happy holidays and there will be another update ready to go this weekend.

Chapter 7

It wasn't Spencer who opened the door to greet Ashley. It was Arthur Carlin—a very drunk Arthur Carlin—who looked disheveled and like he hadn't shaved in days.

"Ashley, how are you?" he slurred. "It's been years!"

"Uh, hi, Mr. C.," Ashley replied in disbelief. She could not believe the man before her eyes was the same man she had at one time considered a second dad. She gladly would have taken him over her own dad, a man she hardly ever saw.

But that was then. Now he looked like a mess. A wasted mess.

In a flash, Spencer was standing in front of her dad. She'd heard the doorbell ring but had no plans to find out who was at the door. She was up in her room brooding and calling Madison every name in the book.

There had been a time when the blonde thought she wasn't capable of hating anyone.

How wrong she had been.

Hate was a word in her vocabulary now that was used on many different occasions: for Madison, for her mom, for the person who killed Clay and for many other people.

Her desire to stay locked in her room and avoid all human contact was all but forgotten when she heard her dad say Ashley's name. At first, Spencer thought it must be a drunken mistake by him. Then she had looked out the window and seen the brunette's car.

In a second, she was down the stairs to prevent her already horrible day from getting any worse.

Spencer shut the door behind her so it was just her and Ashley outside the house. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Everything happened so quickly that Ashley wasn't quite sure what to say or how to react. There were so many questions swirling around in her head it was making it hard for her to think.

"You know what, never mind," Spencer was not going to let Ashley explain herself. "Whatever lie you want to spread about me, go ahead, but how dare you show up here now? How dare you?"

Ashley just stood there, unable to come up with one single thing to say.

"God, you're unbelievable," Spencer said before she turned around and slammed the door in the brunette's face.

Ashley remained on the doorstep for a few minutes, unsure of what happened or what to do next. Eventually she got in her car and drove home.

She was left wondering how her attempt to try and do something good had ultimately made things between her and Spencer even worse.

"Don't talk to me," Spencer said to Ashley the next day when she arrived for class. She still couldn't believe the audacity the brunette had at showing up at her house. Who did she think she was? Her business was hers and nobody else's.

Ashley looked over at Spencer, but the blonde was not making eye contact with her. "Look, I'm sorry about—"

"Are you deaf?" Spencer said angrily, cutting Ashley off. "Don't talk to me."

Ashley sighed but relented. The middle of class wasn't the right time to apologize to Spencer anyway. But things couldn't go on as they had been. They had to find a way to work together which wouldn't set Spencer off and Ashley at the receiving end of verbal jab after verbal jab.

Luckily for Spencer, she wasn't required to speak to Ashley during class. Ms. Devereux was lecturing on finance and budgeting, which would take up the entire lesson. Spencer wasn't listening though. She was too busy feeding her seething anger.

Spencer was sick of everything and everyone.

She was sick of Madison being a bitch to her.

She was sick of being a social pariah at school.

She was sick of her dad's drinking.

She was sick of her mom acting like she didn't exist.

She was sick of Ashley and having to work with her on this project.

She was sick of feeling like she hadn't yet gotten over Clay's death.

She was sick of feeling angry all the time.

It was tiring.

She took off when the bell rang, not in the mood to have Ashley try and speak with her.

She was done.

All Spencer wanted was to be left alone. She knew her very dark mood eventually would pass and be replaced with her usual gloomy, pessimistic mood. She just needed time.

But the more Spencer ignored Ashley, the more Ashley wouldn't let things go. She couldn't get the image of a drunk Arthur Carlin out of her head. It wasn't like her mom didn't drink on occasion, but it was nothing like she had seen the previous day. There was this burning sensation in her gut that wouldn't go away. Ashley suspected that it would only leave her when she got a chance to find out if Spencer was OK.

It was ridiculous for her to feel that way. Ashley knew that. She had spent enough time ignoring Spencer's problems. Why should now be different? She didn't have an answer for that question, it just was. The fact that she didn't know what was going on with Spencer was making Ashley restless.

Not that her life was going super well anyway. Being around Madison was starting to be a chore. There were all these unsaid things that she wanted to say to her but couldn't. And Aiden—well, Aiden was becoming something of a non-factor. They had hardly spent any time together recently, not that this bothered Ashley. But she didn't have the time or energy to wonder why that was.

She was too busy being consumed with all things Spencer.

That afternoon she tried to catch Spencer after school, but she never found her. The next day she tried to catch Spencer in the morning, but Madison cornered her, and by the time Ashley had gotten away, it was too late. She was getting desperate to make things right with her class partner. She ignored Madison's catty remarks when Ashley informed her that she wasn't going to be around at lunch. Her friend wasn't used to people saying no to her.

Ashley didn't care about that. She had found out earlier that Sean wasn't at school today. She figured with him gone, she'd have the chance to get Spencer alone—reaction and fall out be damned.

When lunch time rolled around, Ashley jumped out of her seat. She knew where Spencer spent her lunches. Despite how nervous she was, the brunette was determined to see her plan through.

Unfortunately, when she arrived at the spot where Spencer ate, the girl was nowhere to be found. Ashley sighed, this was way harder than she thought it would be. Just when she felt like giving up, she caught a glimpse of blonde hair out of the corner of her eye. When Ashley looked over, she realized she was looking at the back of Spencer's head. She took off right away in hot pursuit.

Ashley was surprised when she followed Spencer back in the school. She didn't strike Ashley as being someone who wanted to spend more time in this building than she had to. The brunette was even more surprised when she saw Spencer open a door that was clearly not meant for students to open. Feeling like she was some kind of spy, Ashley waited a few minutes before she opened the door as well.

She was greeted with a set of stairs that led, she assumed, to the school's basement.

"This is not a horror movie," Ashley said to herself in an effort to stay calm. She was both intrigued and mildly terrified at the same time.

She walked along a long corridor, but there was no sign of Spencer. She continued cautiously, somewhat convinced that the blonde was about to jump out and scare her at any moment. That never happened however.

Finally, when Ashley was about to give up. She heard someone cough behind a nearby door. The evidence was flimsy, but it sure sounded like Spencer. The sound had come from what appeared to be a guy's restroom so she wasn't going to open it at first. It made no sense. Why in the world would Spencer be there? But she had to see for herself if she was wrong.

With a feeling of foreboding Ashley pushed on door. As it was opening, it occurred to Ashley that she wasn't sure if she wanted to find Spencer or whether she hoped she was wrong.

She wasn't wrong though.

Sitting on the floor, with her head in her hands, was one Spencer Carlin.

"What the—" Spencer said when she heard the door open. She wasn't afraid of getting caught for being in a place she technically wasn't supposed to be, because nobody knew about her hideout, even Sean. "Are you kidding me?" she said when she saw a dumbfounded Ashley staring down at her.

Was she not allowed any peace whatsoever?

"Spencer, is that you?" It was a stupid thing for Ashley to ask considering the fact that she was staring right at the blonde. "What are you doing here?"

"Actually," Spencer angrily started as she stood up, "the better question is: what are you doing here? Were you following me or something?"

Ashley could feel her cheeks turning pink. Her all-consuming need to get to Spencer had stopped her from thinking about what she would actually say to the blonde if she was successful in finding her. She had a fleeting thought before she answered where she wondered if Spencer always looked so upset, or whether it was only when she was speaking to her. "Uh—"

"You're something else," Spencer was shaking her head. If she wasn't so irate she'd probably find the situation funny. "What gave you the right to come and find me here?"

Ashley's throat was suddenly dry, making it hard her for her to answer the question. "I was, uh, I was worried about—"

"Holy shit!" Spencer exclaimed in complete disbelief. This was not happening she told herself. "Don't you dare finish that sentence, Ashley." The brunette tried to get a word in, but Spencer was having none of that. "After all this time, after everything, you have the audacity to try to tell me that you're worried about me? Is this some kind of sick joke? Did Madison send you here to mess with me?"

"No!" Ashley replied loudly. "This has nothing to do with her. This has to do with—"

"Let me guess," Spencer cut in forcefully. "You saw my dad yesterday and now you're overcome with concern for your dear friend Spencer. Is that it?" Once again she would not let the other girl speak. "Let me spell this out for you so you can get it through that thick head of yours. I am nothing for you to even think about, let alone chase down so you can feel better about yourself. What happens with me is not a concern of yours whatsoever. Do you understand me?"

"Spencer, I know what I've done and what I haven't done when it comes to you," Ashley responded when she was given the chance. "But that doesn't mean I—"

"Yes it does!" Spencer once again would not let the brunette finish. She couldn't stand the idea that Ashley had invaded a place that she would often come to when she needed to be alone. It felt like a violation.

"Can you let me finish?" Ashley yelled, her frustration from the last couple of days reaching a breaking point.

Spencer's brightened a little, "Oh, so you do have the ability to fight back. What a surprise!" For weeks she had been provoking Ashley and it seemed like she was finally getting the payoff from that. "I mean, you usually let Madison do your bidding. This is something new for you."

"Leave her out of this!" Ashley wasn't sure how things had become about Madison and not the reason why she had been looking for Spencer. "If you just give me a chance to explain myself. . ." Her voice trailed off when she realized she wasn't even sure what it is she wanted to tell the blonde.

"Why should I?" Spencer asked rhetorically.

Ashley had no response for that.

Spencer shook her head again. "Just leave."

It felt like such an easy choice to make. Clearly Spencer didn't want to talk to her and Ashley was having a hard time coming up with a reason for her to continue to be told to go away. But no matter how easy it seemed, she wasn't going anywhere. "I'm not leaving until you hear me out."

Spencer laughed but did not look amused. "Oh, is that a fact?" There was a very small part of her that admired Ashley for not backing down. However, she would not acknowledge that to herself. "Then I'll be the one to end this farce of a conversation."

The blonde made a move to leave, but Ashley, not really thinking things through, refused to budge from where she was standing.

"Don't think I won't make you move," Spencer threatened.

"You're not the only stubborn one here," Ashley pointed out, hands on her hips. "I'm asking you for five minutes. You can't give me five minutes?"

Spencer backed down somewhat, but she wasn't about to let Ashley have her way. "No, I can't. Give me one good reason why I should?" Her question was met with silence. "Exactly, Ashley. For years you've chosen not to care. So suddenly, when you want to find out what's going on in my life, I need to tell you? It doesn't work that way."

"It's not like that!" Ashley protested, even though deep down she knew that Spencer wasn't wrong.

"You made your choice," Spencer continued. It actually felt good to get out what she'd been holding in for the longest time. "Do you want to me to be grateful that you've shown an interest in my well being?" Ashley wished she was being yelled at because the tone that Spencer was using on her was making her feel like the world's biggest heel. "Do you think my life is so pathetic that I should be jumping up and down because you've decided to come to my rescue?"

"Stop putting words in my mouth!" Ashley exclaimed.

"How arrogant do you have to be to think that I've been waiting here for you to come around and rescue me?" Spencer was on roll and had no desire to let up one bit. "I know this might come as a shock to you, but not everyone fantasizes about being surrounded by mindless idiots, like you are, every day.

Ashley sighed, her shoulders slumped in defeat. It didn't seem possible to stop Spencer from drawing all sorts of conclusions about her, even if some of them were right.

"What I do is none of your business, and my dad is none of your business," Spencer said, her tone very serious. "Don't waste a single second worrying about me because I would not do the same for you." She didn't care if she sounded harsh, the blonde felt she owed the other girl absolutely nothing. "Don't pretend that if it wasn't for this project you would even acknowledge my existence. I'm not an idiot."

"I never said you were," Ashley said when she was finally given the opportunity to talk. The problem was, she couldn't think of anything that would change Spencer's mind about her.

Spencer put her bag over her shoulder. "You can tell Madison that there's nothing for her to worry about."

Ashley stepped aside when Spencer walked towards the door. Although she had no clue what Spencer meant by her last statement, she wasn't about to ask.

She let the blonde go without another word.

There was nothing left to say anyway.