You didn't ask for it, some of you didn't want it, but it's back!
Kakashi looked over his new genin squad curiously as they sat on the roof, soaking up the sunshine. To say they were not what he expected upon reading their files would be something of an understatement.
For one, he didn't know where the one had gotten a full spandex outfit in that particular shade of Blue, but he was nearly certain that Gai had something to do with it. But even that he could have dealt with, if it wasn't for the flamboyant pirate hat that the boy was wearing on top of his face masked helmet. "And then Red ran him through with her sword and-" the boy exclaimed to his companions, having used several pirate terms that curdled the blood of any true ninja previously. The mention of 'stealing' the powers of others had him a bit worried, but he was sure he could train the boy out of whatever it was.
His companions also seemed to be a cause for concern as the pink one was wearing a strange hat, similar to the one the blue nightmare was wearing, but much stiffer. The strange devices at her waist held his attention for a moment, especially as she constantly kept cocking back the hammer-like part at the backside of the shiny silver object.
The final one was the oddest of the lot. From the top down, he was the least suitable for any type of ninja activity. The helmet was a bright blue that only seemed to be ready to stop impact blows to the head and nothing else. The matching blue jersey seemed to stretch over some sort of padding underneath, with more stuffed under the garish red pants. And worst of all he was wearing ice skates.
"Maa... I'm Kakashi Hatake, let's hear some introductions from you three..." Kakashi drawled as he looked over the odd trio curiously. How these three passed the academy baffled him to say the least.
"What would ya have us tell ya," the rosette drawled back with an odd twang to her voice.
"Oh, just your name, dreams for the future, and the like..." Kakashi offered while waving it off as unimportant. "For example: I'm Hatake Kakashi, you're not old enough to know my dreams yet, and my goal is to get through this without having to figure your insanity out."
"HURRICANGER!" A voice called out as the first figure took out some kind of key, his outfit changing into a light blue spandex suit with a ninja theme, before saying, "My name is Naruto Uzumaki, I am a member of the Mega Force Power Rangers, and protect the powers of the Super Sentai."
"Why are you a girl now?" Kakashi asked dryly, having heard of the 'sexy no jutsu' attack, and he was honestly underwhelmed by this.
"DEKARANGER!" The voice called out as Naruto took out a different key, changing into a totally different spandex suit, "Sorry about that. The Blue Dolphin Ranger was a girl, so... well, I can't use that Ranger Key without changing my gender."
"A useful transformation technique, but I would like to talk with you directly, not your other forms," Kakashi droned before turning towards the next one. "How about you oh pink one?"
Dodging from a direct path of the object she whipped out and pointed at him, he watched as a small metal projectile flew past his face and took out a chunk of cement. "I'm not the meek little girl you can get away with calling that, the name's Sakura Haruno, Texas Ranger. One day I will bring in the outlaw Tobi, and prove his identity to the people of Konoha."
"That's an S-ranked nuke-nin, good luck kid," Kakashi grumbled as he turned to look at the third and final one, who just gave him a sneer showing off several missing teeth. "How about you?"
"Sasuke Uchiha, Hockey Nin, I will prove to the village that my brother played dirty before killing my family. He was wrong, the New York Rangers are the best hockey team, and I will prove it with my ultimate skills," Sasuke proclaimed as he stood in the midst of the group sanity overlooked.
"MAGIRANGER!" the henshin voice called out, for Naruto to appear as yet another form, who slung an arm around the avenger's shoulder. "Tell you what, let's team up, us rangers against those that oppose us..."
"We need to do something about our fourth partner..." Sakura mused as she spun the chamber housing more of those metal projectiles.
"I suppose I know where we can get some green clothes and brown leathers," Naruto mused as he reverted to his normal self, and removed the helmet while leaving the hat in place. A female figure wearing a white and gold partially armored spandex suit with a stylized white tiger faceplate then joined them.
"I'm sure you had me choose to be blue since the gender flipped on them regularly!" He snapped at the other figure, "And stop using the Dairanger key."
"Well, I'm not strictly allowed to show my face in the village." The stranger said, "Anyway, have you finished with class?"
"No, he has not, who are you?" Kakashi asked, getting a bad sense of where this was going. "And please spare me the ranger stuff, just a name."
"Kurama, and I'm Naruto's friend. We have some ranger stuff to do, so..." the tiger faced female stated flatly, getting a wave of dismissal from the teacher.
"Have him at the tower tomorrow by nine, I'm going to see about getting them reassigned to more... appropriate teams," Kakashi stated vaguely before disappearing in a swirl of leaves.
As he found his way towards the Hokage office, he reflected on just how wrong his life had gone, and how easily it could be fixed by bathing in gravy, strapping steak to his body, and leaping headfirst into the Forest of Death.