[Disclaimer] All things Twilight belong to Mrs. Stephenie Meyer

[A/N] Welcome back my lovely readers. I'm so happy that you're enjoying to read my little soap opera…ahm…I mean fan fiction. Your amazing feedback encourages me to continue writing.

This one is dedicated to lynettecullen for liking Zafrina's character. Hope you'll enjoy…

**Chapter 37**

Ali's POV

The line between friendship and love is a thin one. It is not difficult to step from one to the other or back again. Right now I wished that the line could somehow turn into a huge ravine that was impossible to cross for anyone standing on the different sides of it.

I sipped on cup of hot chocolate in front of me and tried to concentrate on the sketch in front of me. The house felt cold and empty to me without Bella in it, too cold actually. Should I call her?

The doorbell rang and when I looked up to the clock at the other side of the kitchen wall I wondered why Zafrina would be here so early.

"Hi beautiful girl, care for company?" Jazz greeted me cheerfully as I opened the door. She smirked sheepishly while she twisted her honey blonde curls into a lose ponytail.

"Jazz, I've already told you that pick-up line is lame."

She chuckled slightly.

"Yeah, I know Ali."

"What are you doing here?"

For a split second a frown appeared on her pretty face, making her look as if she was in pain right now.

"What, can't I visit you when I want to? Doesn't your straight girlfriend allow you to have friends apart from her?"

I bite my own tongue to keep me from saying something rude to her in response but then I just forced my lips into the weak attempt of a smile.

"She doesn't have to allow me anything. I can meet with my friends," I emphasized the word overdramatically, "whenever I want to."

"That's good to hear, Ali."

We walked back into the house and I poured her a glass of orange juice that she emptied in one gulp.

"How are you feeling?" she asked me as she sat down on one of the kitchen chairs.

Suspiciously I raised one eyebrow.

"Don't tell me that my father paid you again for talking to me?"

She shook her head.

"No, he didn't, you don't have to worry about that. I think that he doubts my skills as a therapist deeply after what happened at his house."

"Good…or not. Well, I don't really know. I wished they could accept things the way they are right now."

"Hmm,"

Her eyes caught one of the pregnancy guidebooks that were lying on the counter.

"What's that? Don't tell me you and her are trying to play happy rainbow family? I thought that you didn't want to have kids…ever."

"The books are for my sister. She's finally pregnant."

"Really? That makes me happy for her and Emmett. They're the kind of people who should have kids."

Her fingers moved over the edge of her glass that clinked under the touch, the noise was so annoying that I grabbed the glass to put in in the dishwasher.

"You're turning into a good housewife." She commented.

"And your ass looks really good from that angle."

I turned around and crossed my arms in front of my chest, desperately hoping that the layer of makeup I had put on today would be able to hide my blush. God, who on earth blushes after the age of twelve? I mean who apart from me and Bella?

"My ass looks good from every angle, but thanks."

"You're very welcome."

She took one of the sketches in her hands and looked at them while she continued biting her lower lip nervously.

"These are good."

"They're not. They're actually pretty lousy but I can't concentrate right now."

"Why? Is the straight girl distracting you too much?"

"Jazz, I don't like the way you call her straight girl. She's part of my life now and if you're planning on staying one too, you should better start accepting that…very soon."

Her gaze softened and when she spoke up again her voice was smooth like velvet.

"Ali, you know that I care about you. You are special to me and I don't want you to get hurt because some dull housewife uses you to spice up her miserable life."

"She's not trying to spice up her life. To tell the truth, her life would be a lot less complicated if I wasn't in it." I tried to make my voice sound hard but it cracked at the end and I swallowed hard to keep the tears from falling.

"Things are pretty complicated for the two of you, aren't they? You are afraid that what she might feel for you won't be enough."

Damn it, she knew all the buttons that triggered my fears and she wasn't afraid to push them. Stupid psycho crap…

Slowly she stood up from her chair and kneeled down in front of me while I stared down on the kitchen floor.

"Hey." She mumbled so low that I could barely hear her speak at all.

"I'm here for you if you want to talk about it."

I raised my head and when I opened my mouth to speak again I tasted something wet and salty on the tip of my tongue.

"Shhh, it's okay, Ali. It's okay." She wrapped her arms around my neck to let me sob against her shoulder.

Her fingertips stroked over the spikey curls of my hair until I finally felt like I couldn't cry anymore.

When I finally managed to pull back, I suddenly felt embarrassed by my emotional breakdown. Quickly I wiped my running nose on the sleeve of my shirt.

"You got some…" she mumbled while she pulled a tissue out of her pocket to clean my face, "mascara on your cheek."

"Thanks." I whispered embarrassedly, standing up from the chair. My knees were trembling and I hated myself for being so incredibly weak.

"I'm sorry, Ali. I didn't come here to make you cry."

"Yeah, I know."

She stood up from the ground and put a wisp of my hair behind my ear. When her fingertips brushed against the skin of my neck a shiver went down my spine.

Automatically I took two steps backwards until my back touched the wood of the counter.

"Please don't touch me like that. It's so…" irritating, wrong, confusing, I added in my head.

"Yeah, I know. For me too, Ali..." She put one hand on my shoulder, her touch light as a feather.

"You're different since you came back from Europe. More mature somehow, I kind of like that. It suits you well."

"Five years is a long time." I stated crossing my arms in front of chest in an attempt to get more distance between me and her.

"But you're still you. And when I look at you, I still think the same that I thought before you left."

"And that is?" I choked out, instantly regretting the question as soon as the words left my mouth.

She cleared her throat before she spoke up again.

"What I always think…what I'm always going to think, Ali…that you're the most beautiful, incredible woman I know and that I don't want to lose you to someone who is probably going to hurt you anyway."

"Jazz, please. You know that I care about you, but I don…"

Her mouth was on mine before I could turn my head to the side. She kissed me hungrily, as if she was trying to soak up a part of me that she deep inside her head knew wasn't hers anymore. I gasped for air and the tip of her tongue slipped forcefully between my lips. I thought about biting down on it…

Finally she pulled back and when I saw the smug grin on her face anger spread through my veins. Without thinking what I was doing I raised my hand and slapped her right across her face.

"Outch!" She rubbed her chin while I walked to the other side of the kitchen.

"Why did you hit me?"

"Why did you kiss me?" I snarled at her, cursing myself for the slight tremble in my voice.

"Because I wanted to kiss you, Ali…I love you…god I never stopped loving you."

"I fucking hate you, Jazz. My stupid life is already complicated enough. You know how important our friendship is to me and you're ruining everything with this love crap."

"How can you call it crap? Have you forgotten that I was always there for you? How often I listened to your sobbing on the phone it the middle of the night? How dare you call my feelings crap!"

"Jasmine, lower your voice. You're going to wake the child up."

"So that's what you're doing right now; babysitting the result of your girlfriend's heterosexual past?"

A low growl left my throat and I stuffed my hand into the pockets of my jeans to keep me from hitting her again.

"You're such a hypocrite, Jazz. You don't give a shit about my happiness. All you care for is your own."

"That's not true. Have you forgotten everything I told you about messing with straight people? She's not like us. She only dated men before, god she even married one."

"I know that, Jazz. It doesn't matter to me."

"Trust me, Ali, it will when she suddenly discovers how much she misses the lack of cock in your relationship. And that will happen, it's inevitable."

"You don't know a thing about the relationship between me and Bella."

"Yeah, I know, but I know the difference between people like us and her."

Only a gold star lesbian is a good lesbian. God, why couldn't she see that Bella's past didn't matter to me? Well, of course I'd prefer it if my moron of a brother wouldn't be part of it…

"You should probably go now, Jazz, before you'll say more stupid things that will mess things between us up completely."

"Fine, if that's what you want. I'll leave, but don't forget that I'll be waiting for you to crawl back to me when the straight girl rips out your heart."

"Fuck you!"

She chuckled slightly as we walked to the front door.

"It's cute when you're angry like that. I like it when you get so passionate."

I opened the door and almost stumbled over Zafrina who was standing in the door frame.

"Hello Miss Cullen, I'm not disturbing you and Miss Whitlock, am I?"

"No of course not, Miss Penthes…she was about to leave now."

Jazz leaned over and planted a kiss on my cheek, knowing that I wouldn't punch her in the presence of another person.

"Good bye, Ali. Call me…when…you know when." she mumbled, rubbing her chin thoughtlessly.

"Miss Whitlock, are you having toothache?"

"No, I don't. Thanks for asking. Good bye, Miss Penthes. Don't make her pay too much for your support. I'm sure you have enough other clients whose money you can take."

She climbed on her motorcycle that roared underneath her when she turned on the engine.

"I bet all of your voluntary work helped you a big deal to buy that Harley."

"I didn't say that I work for free, but unlike you I'm trying to help people solve their problems."

"Yeah, whatever…the bike is pretty cool actually. I wished I had enough time for stuff like that but I'm far too busy making pots of money with my unrespectable job."

"Guess we all have our priorities in life, Miss Penthes. But I'm probably going to sell the bike."

"Really? That's too bad. You look good on it." A smile flashed over her ebony face and for a moment I wondered if she was trying to flirt with Jazz. I tried to remember if Bella had mentioned a boyfriend but I couldn't think of it. Would that be a good plan to try to pair them up?

"Yeah, I know I do, but it's too expensive to afford it anyway."

"Too bad..."

Jasmines waved her hands at us and when her body disappeared at the corner of the street I sighed deeply.

"That bike is really cool. Such a shame she wants to sell it."

"Hmm, I don't know. I don't really care about bikes…"

"Yeah, I guess you don't, Miss Cullen. Is everything okay with you?"

"Of course I'm okay, why are you asking, Miss Penthes?"

"You seem a little bit tensed today." She stated as we walked into the house.

"I hope it's not because of the proceeding against your brother."

I quickly shook my head.

"No, it's not. It's just…well, forget it…it doesn't even matter."

She sat down on the couch in the living room and pulled a file out of her handbag.

"I think it does. Look, I know that the situation you're currently living in is difficult for you. It's always difficult to start a relationship with someone who isn't completely free."

"It's like everyone is trying to pull us apart. And there are a million reasons why we shouldn't be together."

"There are always a lot more reasons why people shouldn't be together and only a few why they should."

XOXOXOXOXO

[A/N] How did you like the chapter? I'm not sure whether Ali should tell Bella that Jasmine kissed her. Technically she should, because…well that's just how I picture their relationship to be like. On the other hand…Bella will be so pissed when she finds out…that would be fun to write/read; don't you think?