Wow! So many milestones to celebrate in this chapter! 103 reviews! I'm overwhelmed by the support! And this is the 40th chapter... What? I'd never planned to go on for this long, though I might take a break from this story for a bit in the near future because I have a few plot bunnies that I want to let loose, and they'd be easier to write with fewer characters. Of course, I can kick people temporarily off of the TARDIS, write the plot bunny, bring the kicked off characters back on, kick others off... Or maybe not. What can I say? I'm nuts! But for fun, to celebrate 100 reviews and Christmas, I'm letting the TARDIS crew write this chapter. Could be dangerous... Jack! Don't you dare write that! This is rated T, not M!

I don't own Doctor Who and these people are in it, but don't own it either...

CHAPTER 40

TWELVE: What are we doing here again?

ROSE 12: I think Hediru wants us to write this chapter.

ELEVEN: So, what do we write? I hope it's not an ending. I hate endings.

JACK: I've got an idea. Let me tell you about this time I was arrested on Dulcetta 5. You see...

DONNA: How many naked people are in this story?

JACK: Just one. But he had a very large...

ROSE 9: (shoves Jack away from the keyboard) OKAY! That's enough of that. I'm sure it's a very interesting story, Jack, but there is a time and a place, yeah?

JACK: What? This is a time and place.

CLARA: (rolls eyes at Jack) Ok. Here's what we'll do. How about we go around the room and share a favorite Christmas memory? And keep it PG-13, Jack!

JACK: So you don't really want my favorite memory then... (He grins provocatively and is ignored by all)

TEN: My favorite Christmas memory was the dinner I had with Rose and her Mum.

ROSE 10: The one after the Sycorax invasion? Aww! Look who's getting all domestic!

TEN: (blushing) I...But...I... that's not fair!

SHAUN: That is a bit domestic, mate. Sorry.

TEN: (pouts) Well who asked you anyway?

ROSE 10: Oh. Stop pouting!

TEN: Time Lords don't pout! (He storms out)

AMY: (casting eyes at Eleven) Heh. Sure they don't!

ELEVEN: What? What did I do? Tell me one time I've pouted!

AMY: What about when Van Gogh and I were talking about our hair and you wanted to be ginger?

ELEVEN: Well... I...

RORY: Or when my wife and I humbly requested not to have bunk beds?

ELEVEN: Hey... that's not...

RIVER: Or every time I've insulted his headwear by shooting it.

ELEVEN: Oh now... really...

ROSE 11: Don't even get me started on choosing a planet to visit on a date. He still doesn't understand why Cotton Candy Land is not romantic. (All women laugh)

ELEVEN: Rose! You're supposed to be on my side!

CLARA: Whatever you do, don't take his Jammie Dodgers!

ROSE 11: Or bananas.

AMY: Or fish fingers and custard! (All of Eleven's companions howl with laughter)

ELEVEN: Hey, I said name one time! One!

RIVER: Sorry, Sweetie. But you're kind of proving our point...

ELEVEN: I don't have to take this abuse anymore! (He storms out)

TENTOO: Thank goodness I don't have that issue.

ROSE 10.2: Oh really? You think you don't pout? Shall I list them like we did for Eleven?

TENTOO: ... No.

ROSE 10.2: Good. How about you share your favorite Christmas memory then? (She smiled at him suggestively)

TENTOO: (He looks at his wife with adoration and amazement) Why, the day I married you, of course!

EVERYONE: Awwww!

NINE: You're so sweet that you make me sick! Dinner with the Tyler's. Weddings. Just what I need to turn into in the future. A domesticated lap dog! That's it! I refuse to regenerate!

ROSE 9: You didn't mind the domestics on our date last night...

NINE:... Now that is completely beside the point!

SHAUN: Hate to break it to you mate, bit that's pretty domestic, too.

NINE: (folds arms across chest and glares at Shaun) Oh yeah? Well who asked you?

MARTHA: (snorts) Well, at least we know that the older Doctors come by their aversion to domestics and tendency to pout honestly.

NINE: I'm not pouting. I'm sulking. There's a difference!

MICKEY: Whatever you say, boss.

TWELVE: And I don't pout. That's for children... I'm not a child!

DANNY: Maybe, but you do sulk a bit.

TWELVE: Your point is...?

CLARA: Ok! Well, will someone else please share their favorite Christmas memory? This is really getting out of hand...

ELEVEN: (Runs back into the room, along with Ten) Hey, lookie what we found!

ROSE 11: Is that a rubber chicken?

DONNA: Do I even want to know? Nah. Probably not.

MARTHA: Why in the world do you have a rubber chicken on the TARDIS?

TEN: Prepared for anything, that's me!

MICKEY: And why would you ever NEED a rubber chicken? (Sees Jack about to speak) I didn't ask you!

JACK: (smiles innocently) What?

JENNY: (collapses on the floor, laughing hysterically, tears coming out of her eyes,) I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I can't take it anymore! This has got to be the barmiest crew I have ever been a part of! Do you really think that Hediru is ever going to let us write a chapter after this? I mean... really!

This is a reminder not to breach the fourth wall...

TEN: Fourth wall? Which one? Are we talking about the inside or the outside of the TARDIS? Because the outside clearly has for walls. But which one is the fourth? And there are a lot more than four on the inside. Again, which one is the fourth? And why would we want to breach it? Unless you're talking about walls between parallel worlds, then we have a whole other issue to consider. Why I once met this fellow from Omron 3 that accidentally...

ROSE 10: (covers her Doctor's mouth) Anyway, getting back to what Clara had said. Favorite Christmas memory?

ELEVEN: When I got to reenact "The Christmas Carol".

AMY: You do realize that Rory and I almost died that time, right?

ELEVEN: Wouldn't have been the first time. Or the last. Seriously. You two are the jeopardy friendliest pair I've ever had on board the TARDIS. And that's saying something, because you've beat Rose.

ALL ROSES: Oi!

ELEVEN: You know perfectly well that you're jeopardy friendly, so don't "Oi!" me!

DANNY: Ok. Before we get off topic AGAIN... I'd like to share my favorite Christmas memory. Or what I hope will be a favorite memory.

CLARA: What's that? (Smiles sweetly at him)

DANNY: Well, as soon as Hediru gets her writing privileges back I'm gonna...

RIVER: Spoilers!

Again. Fourth wall!

TEN: You keep saying that, and I ask you again...

ROSE 10: (covering his mouth again) I remember this time when I really wanted a red bicycle. (Ten licks her hand) Ew! You did not just do that! (He looks at her and grins. She wipes her hand on his sleeve.)

TEN: You covered my mouth! Again!

ROSE 12: (picking up the story) Yeah, my Mum couldn't afford it. My friends teased me that I was too old but I wanted it desperately.

ROSE 11: And on Christmas, there it was under the tree. To this day, Mum doesn't know where it came from. But I loved that bicycle!

NINE: Circuital loop paradox. That's where it came from.

ROSE 9: What?

NINE: You told me the story. So I went back in time one night while you were sleeping and put the bicycle under your tree. So you told me the story. So I went back in time. Get it?

ROSE 9: Um... thanks? I think?

ROSE 10.2: On behalf of all my selves, thank you, Doctor. You didn't have to do that.

NINE: Yes I did. Because I'd already done it!

JACK: I think he means you're welcome.

JENNY: Well, I think this chapter's getting out of hand.

DONNA: Getting? It was lost a very long time ago!

CLARA: So maybe we should just wrap it up.

RORY: Right. So on behalf of all of us on the TARDIS, Thank you for reading.

AMY: Thanks for 100 reviews!

TWELVE: And have a Merry Christmas!

ALL: MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Thanks guys. That's a wrap. You're all fired btw.

ALL: Aww!

ELEVEN: Well, Jack started it!

JACK: Excuse me?!

TWELVE: Technically, I started it...

I don't know what to do with them...