Chapter 9

Kylo threw himself into his work, but a small part of his awareness remained focused on Rey through the force. She remained in her cage. She had eaten breakfast while watching the holos, and he had sensed her curiosity and near comical shock at learning how reproduction worked. Her reaction to the mandatory masturbation tutorial had him struggling not to laugh as a lieutenant explained the advantages of the newest TIE fighter model, and he had to excuse himself rapidly to hide his mirth when Rey realized he had been watching her and let out a string of very creative curses at him that she likely had learned from Chewie.

He had left his quarters to help himself think clearly, but she remained all he thought about. Even as Rey entered a deep meditation, Kylo could not pull his thoughts away from her.

"Still obsessed, I see," Hux said.

"Hmm?" Kylo responded. He then remembered they were in a meeting to discuss their plans to disable the Resistance beyond repair.

Hux shook his head in disgust and dismissed the subordinates. After Kylo and Hux were alone, Hux said, "You're pathetic like this, Ren."

Kylo eyed his general, wondering how far he could trust the man. After a moment, he realized he didn't care. He would go insane if he couldn't talk to someone about this. "I think I'm in love with her."

Hux rolled his eyes. "Of course you do. You finally encounter a woman as powerful and ambitious as you, and you lose your mind with thoughts of making her your own. Well guess what, Ren. That fairy tale may be as old as time, but it always ends in tragedy!"

Kylo paused. Something in Hux's voice called out to him. "Who was it?" Kylo asked. "Who broke your heart, Hux?"

Hux seethed. "I don't have a heart, Ren."

Overcome with curiosity, Kylo took the slightest glance into Hux's mind. There was no mistaking the woman he saw, even though he had rarely seen her out of armor. "Phasma? Seriously?"

Hux turned white with rage. "My thoughts are my own, Ren! You and that Jedi girl need to learn to stay out of my head!"

Hux stomped off, leaving Kylo alone and bemused. He had never considered the possibility that General Hux and Captain Phasma had been anything other than professional with each other, though they worked together frequently. He wondered what Phasma had done to Hux to make the man so bitter. Not that it mattered. If Phasma survived the Supremacy, she had not revealed herself.

Well, Rey and Phasma were nothing alike. Rey might have a history of trying to murder and abandon him, but she was never needlessly cruel, except when she called him a monster and accused him of hating his father. Kylo sighed. Maybe he was being a fool.

Still, he had to see this through or he would likely forever feel this conflicted and distracted.

Kylo returned to his quarters immediately, not slowing down once on the way. He would tell Rey he loved her, and then figure things out from there.

He entered his quarters nearly breathless from having jogged there. Rey's eyes opened in alarm as he stood inside the door panting and bent over.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

Kylo straightened up, marched to her cage, opened it, and looked her in the eyes. "I love you."

"I know," Rey said and met his eyes.

Kylo stared at her, dumbfounded. He had just revealed that his heart to her. "Is that it? That's all you will say?"

Rey stood and walked up to face him, never breaking the gaze. She closed her eyes then, slowly leaned forward, and kissed the spot over his beating heart, then looked back at him. "I'm still a prisoner in a cage, Kylo."

Kylo cringed. He had nearly forgotten. "What should I do, Rey? I can't free you," he said. He couldn't. He couldn't betray the First Order for her anymore than she could betray the Resistance for him.

"I understand," Rey said, and he knew she was also thinking about how they were loyal to opposite sides of a war.

Kylo gazed down at her, desperate to make this better somehow. "Please, tell me, Rey. What can I do?"

"Let me see Finn. He's here on this ship. I can sense him, and he's terrified."

Her voice was even and commanding, and Kylo narrowed his eyes at her, but then he sensed the waver of her lips and let the force flow through him to sense the nature of her emotions. The truth hit him in a wave. She was scared and worried for her friend, who had been isolated since his arrival. There was no desire beyond the wish to reassure him that he was not alone. She was a good friend. A better one than the traitor deserved. "I can do that for you," Kylo said softly.

"Thank you," Rey whispered, and she leaned her forehead against his chest. Her gratitude and relief enveloped him like a warm blanket.

Kylo thought quickly. He could not free her, but this was another way of showing her his love. "I'll escort himself so that he sees no harm. You will have his company from lunch until after dinner, at which point I will escort him back to his cell."

Rey wrapped her arms around his waist and nuzzled him. Kylo embraced her back, enjoying the feel of her body tucked against him. "Thank you," she said again. "I watched the holos." He could feel her embarrassment through the force, and he wondered that he didn't tune in to her feelings while she was experiencing pleasure from him the night before.

"And?" he said.

"I understand why you went to the shower now. You were masturbating, right?"

Kylo's ears burned and he froze. She was correct, but a childhood of etiquette training under Leia Organa made such frank admissions very uncomfortable for him. Explaining the science of how one became pregnant last night to her had been bad enough.

"If I may, I would like to help next time," Rey said.

Shock overwhelmed Kylo, and he leaned back to look down at her in his arms. "You mean it?"

Rey smiled up at him. "I do. I didn't answer your question earlier… you asked me if I wanted to stay here. I don't want to be your prisoner, Kylo, but I do want to be with you."

Kylo felt his lips stretch in a smile so broad and unfamiliar that it hurt his mouth. "I want to kiss you," he said.

Rey's smile faltered. "There are some things that should wait until we're free."

Kylo's smile fell away. "You did not object to my kissing you last night." He gazed down at her breasts.

Rey blushed. "You weren't kissing my lips."

Kylo smirked. Challenge accepted. "So I can kiss you so long as it's not your lips?" he asked. He leaned down, pulled her hair aside, and kissed her neck behind her right ear. "Like right here?"

"Yes," Rey breathed. She stilled in his arms, and he could feel her affection become dark with desire through the force as he carefully pulled back and then kissed behind her other ear. Her breathing became unsteady as he bent down to kiss her collarbone and the exposed gap of her tunic below it.

He ran his hands down her shoulders, down the sides of her breasts, and cupped them firmly. His hands were trembling with excitement, and he hoped she didn't notice. "Your breast band is back on," he noted. It was a thick piece of cloth wrapped several times.

"I've had a lifetime of protecting myself by making sure I stayed clothed around men," Rey said. "Even knowing what the holos said, I don't feel comfortable being naked with you yet."

Kylo could respect that. He was amazed she allowed him to do as much as she had. "You want me to avoid kissing your lips, and you want to stay dressed." He slid his hands down to her hips and noted the thin cloth of her leggings. "Should I avoid both pairs of lips?"

Rey stared at him in confusion, so he rotated his hands down her pelvis so the thumbs pressed gently above her core. Realization flowed through her, and she gently thrust forward into his hands.

Kylo smiled at her. "We should probably move somewhere more comfortable." He took her hand and lead her to his bed, where she stood awkwardly. "Please, sit down," he said.

Rey sat on the edge and stared at him wide-eyed.

"You're sure you want to do this?" he asked. The force showed that she was still hungry with desire, but she was also apprehensive.

"Last night was my first time doing anything like that with anyone, Kylo. It's just new to me," Rey said. "And it was really, really intense."

Kylo sensed the unasked question and sat down on the bed beside her. "Rey, last night was my first time doing anything like that with anyone too. You're my first."

Rey narrowed her eyes at him. "You said you dreamed of being with women…"

"I dreamed of being with you, and only you," Kylo said. "There's never been anyone else. What I learned I learned from sneaking into my father's holo collection before I got shipped off to Luke's academy. Mother didn't know about it. I expect she might have killed him if she found out. I wasn't even ten yet."

Rey's jaw dropped, and she laughed heartily. "I imagine it was quite a shock for you then. What were you like when you were ten?"

"Awkward and gangly with an overdeveloped sense of my own self-worth," Kylo said.

Rey showed her teeth in a feral grin. "So not much has changed," she said. Kylo smirked and gently shoved her sideways away from him in a half-hearted protest. Rey grinned throughout it and fell into him when she righted herself, leaning into the crook of his neck.

"I am Supreme Leader of the First Order and Master of the Knights of Ren, you know, and technically the Prince of Alderaan, not that I ever stepped foot on it."

Rey smiled gently. "I didn't know you were a prince, but you did offer to let me rule the galaxy with you."

"So next time I ask I should lead with my title as a prince?" Kylo teased with a smile.

Rey reached out and traced the smile on his face, though it faded with her touch into something more intense. "I've never seen you this relaxed and happy," Rey said.

"You're here," Kylo said. He wrapped an arm around her and kissed the side of her head. "Please don't leave me again, Rey. It nearly destroyed me to wake up in the Supremacy and discover you were gone. I don't want to be without you."

Rey nodded. "I can do that."

Kylo furrowed his brow. "But the Resistance…"

Rey twisted and looked him in the eyes. "I hated what the Resistance made of my connection to you, Kylo, and I missed you too. I will stay by your side as long as you want me too, okay?"

Kylo nodded, feeling the truth of her conviction through the force. He squeezed her tighter and kissed her cheek, wondering all the while how they would make things work between them.

We're getting near the end, folks. Thinking 2-3 chapters left.

Hope you're still enjoying it and please let me know what you think!