AN: Sorry for the wait! And it isn't as long as I wanted, but that just means there's more room for another chapter!

Yeah...no. That didn't make a lick of sense. This chapter contains slight crack. My sis is helpin' me with this and this was her idea. Lol I'm not trying to throw you under the bus sis (if it's bad). XD

Disclaimer: I do not own anything.

"Did you hear about Megatron?"

Starscream lazily looked at Skywarp. "No. What happened to the old fragger?"

Oh, Starscream knew what had happened—he just wanted to hear what was (hopefully) a different story.

"Well, Soundwave found him passed out in the rec room. Cannon on the other side of the room. He doesn't remember what happened, just that he was talking to Onslaught, then—thud. "

The red seeker scoffed. "Surely our grand leader isn't getting senile on us…"

Well that was a relief. No one was even slightly suspicious. Of course, Starscream hadn't run into Soundwave yet. That's going to be the highlight of the cycle…

"I heard he was gonna be out of it for a while."

"Oh? Is he sick or something?"

"Yeah—apparently he could barely walk."

How terrible.

"How terrible."

Skywarp leaned in closer to Starscream's face, squinting his optics to slits.

"Pretty strange, right Starscream?"

The trine leader stared at the purple jet-former for a good minute. After what he felt was a sufficient amount of "you're an idiot" glaring, he blinked a few times for good measure. "Yes. Pretty strange, Skywarp."

Turning around to leave, he nearly jumped to the ceiling as he was face-to-face with Thundercracker.

"That whole incident was a little strange. Not to mention the way you've been acting lately."

"What are you talking about? How exactly am I acting?"

"Well you seem on edge, like you did something...?"

Skywarp snorted. "TC, this is Starscream we're talking about. He's always kinda twitchy. Like a Chihuahua—"

"A what?"

"Ya know, one of those teeny tiny four legged furry things? They're all bug-eyed and jump at everything! Reminds me of Starscream—"

He was abruptly silenced by a loud and painful whack over the back of his helm.

"Would you shut up you insufferable idiot! I am not on edge about anything! I have nothing to share with either of you and I do not act like a Chihuahua!"

Again he tried to leave but was once again startled—this time by none other than Soundwave.

Starscream was angry at first, but then realized that he was very close to being caught. The telepath would try and read his mind for sure, and find other secrets he did not want revealed.

Too worked up to think properly, the SIC bolted, leaving his trine mates and the blue mech staring after him.

There was a moment of silence. Then, Skywarp.

"Good way not to look guilty, Starscream…"

It had been a few days since Megatron recovered from Starscream's failed attempt when the jet-former set another plan in motion. He had (somehow) avoided the shady Soundwave, which encouraged him that much more to go through with his scheme.

The leader of the Decepticons had his own private quarters. In those private quarters there was a wash room. Starscream knew this for…strategic reasons. His plan was to place a strong dose of pheromones in the shower head in the wash room. It was a rather potent mix he decided to use- he wasn't sure what exactly was going to happen, but it would get the job done. If he couldn't humiliate the old fool one-on-one, surely with the help of the entire army of Decepticons…

He just hoped it didn't blow up like his last experiment.

Megatron stepped out of the door if his quarters. He felt like a new mech after he cleaned off all of the sand from their successful energon raid that morning. No grit in his joints or seams. The gun-former almost even polished himself he was in such a good mood. Almost—such vanity was something his Second would do. Besides, he looked fine without all of that time-consuming polish.

He considered Starscream's behavior lately as he made his way through the command center. He had a sinking feeling his black out a few days ago had something to do with the little glitch. He still couldn't quite remember what happened…

The silver mech felt as if he was being watched, but ignored it. Primus. Just thinking of the SIC made him paranoid…

Starscream was definitely up to something. He hadn't seen him lurking around the med bay during his stay—sure sign he was guilty. He participated in the raid that morning, but not much. That's probably why it went off without a hitch…

Megatron made a noise akin to a gasp when he felt something press against him from behind. He looked down as two blue and white arms wrapped firmly around his waist and pulled him back into them. He was too shocked to react as Soundwave explored his frame with his servos. The cassette player hummed low into the side of his leader's helm, which sent Megatron into more of a daze. It was almost scary how fast the TIC had the gun-former leaning into his touches.

As soon as Megatron heard himself let out the slightest of moans, he broke away from the blue mech's grip. He quickly turned to face him with an incredulous stare.

"Soundwave…what do you think you're doing?"

Soundwave said nothing as he looked down at his servos. He seemed perplexed, but Megatron didn't particularly care at the moment. As he opened his mouth to yell at his Third, he stopped himself. It was much too quiet in the command center. His optics scanned the room. When he first entered the room it was the normal low roar. He wasn't sure when everyone decided to shut up and stare at him…

Shaking his head at the strangeness, Megatron turned his attention back to Soundwave. Soundwave had managed to silently invade his personal space while he was distracted. Megatron stepped back only to hit the edge of a table. He started a growl of annoyance but it quickly formed into a short yell as he was hoisted up onto the table and flat on his back, contents on the table sliding off to the floor. Two blue servos slammed on either side of Megatron's head. He cursed to himself for flinching, and from the sensation of the Communication's Officer grinding their hips together.

This had gone on for long enough…

Starscream had his servo firmly clamped over his mouth as he witnessed the scene playing out in front of him. Megatron was out for energon as he thrashed and clawed at his "captor", only to have his arms pulled above his head by one of the coneheads. This had everyone else in the room circle in closer. The SIC had to let out a short laugh at the wolf whistles and dirty talk that quickly started from the small crowd. He leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms, taking in the view. He didn't care who saw him standing there—they wouldn't bother with him for long with Megatron nearby…

He himself had a hard time keeping away from the pheromone-drenched Decepticon. The jet decided to have self-control for once (somehow) and watch the show. It was all going so perfectly between Soundwave's—apparent—overactive libido and all the other Decepticons to his leader's enraged shouts.

He wasn't jealous of all of those servos touching Megatron at all.

That thought jarred Starscream from his comfortable leaning position. Where had that come from? He didn't want Megatron! He decided that earlier when he rigged the shower head! He decided those feelings were stupid and fleeting anyway. Seeing Megatron degraded in such a way was worth ignoring the slight irk in his chest.

It was worth seeing the monotone Soundwave tease his frame, pushing the silver legs on either side of him further apart. Seeing Ramjet and the other soldiers laughing at their leader's threats and the slight blush on his face.

Before he could stop himself, Starscream stomped over to the group and started to break it up. Of course he didn't have much effect, but the distraction gave Megatron the chance to break free of his confinement.

And all Pit broke loose.

Hee...funny. Plz let me know what you guys think! I'd appreciate and love you for it!