The Market was the heart of the Sanctuary. Most people went through at least once a day. Among the workers it was the one little part of life that was enjoyable, just like the old world. Those with talents for crafting or math were often given charge of stalls to sell their wares or those items scavenged by others. Unlike many of the other workers you never found yourself getting lost in the old world commercialism, you were always too worried about never having enough points to get what you and Deacon needed to enjoy the frivolity of it all like some people did. This time however, despite your reservations about entering in this strange new agreement with Negan, you looked forward to being able to give Deacon whatever his heart wanted.
As you walked in the large, open room filled with tables and stalls you noticed that the lines were shorter than normal. Maybe it has something to do with what Gavin and Simon came to talk to Negan about.. You mused as you set Deacon down, urging him to stay close as you took his hand and walked towards the area where all the clothes available were hanging. Everyone was given the basics, a decent change of clean clothes when you arrived but beyond that it was all points, unless you fought for Negan or married him. Well, except us now… You mused nervously as you searched through the rack of women's clothes till you came across a deep royal blue and forest green boho style patch work dress. It was so far from the black form fitting number that Negan used to make you wear and far more inline with your personal style before the world went to hell. With a small grin, to no one but yourself, you pulled the dress off the rack. Resting the dress across your free arm you started to make your way towards the shelves that housed the toddler sized clothes.
There were two shelves, side by side. One of used clothes, taken from homes the area, which you almost always picked from as they cost less points and to you it mattered far more than Deacon had warm clothes than good looking clothes. The other shelf, which was nearly twice as full, held all the pristine new clothes taken from mall nearly 10 miles from the Sanctuary. These were clothes that only the soldiers' children were about to wear. Now as you reached up and pulled a pair of jeans down you could feel the other worker's eyes burn into your soul. They all will know. That doubtful voice in your head, that sounded dangerously like your mother at times, called out silently. It's not like you don't know they whisper about him…about you… It called out again from the darkest corners of your mind.
Your eyes dart around the room, searching for a sign of your suspicions but find everyone busy with their own business. A small sigh of relief escapes your lips as your smile down at your son. Setting your dress and the pair of jeans down on the shelf for a moment you walk over to a stack of handmade baskets and pick one up, Deacon in tow the whole time. Walking back over to the shelf, you drop the basket to the floor before you pulled down the dress and jeans dropping into the basket. "Bubba," You say softly to your son as you let go of his hand. "stay right here…I don't want to see one toe move mister…" You say in a soft yet stern voice. The little boy gave you a quick nod before you turned back to the shelf and began to search through the clothes. Pulling anything in Deacon's size that you thought was cute and toss it in the basket with the other clothes.
As the basket neared capacity you reached down and slipped it over your arm. As your turned around to take Deacon's hand you spied Simon walking through the back entrance of the market place. "Great.." You groaned softly as you started to walk past the women's clothes again. Spying a decent looking pair of jeans and a summery sky blue peasant top hanging next to each other you pulled them off the hangers without looking at the sizes and placed them on top of the basket. "Bubba…" You called to Deacon again glancing down at him, his hand gripping yours tightly, before finishing your journey to the 'Check out' area.
As you stood in the short line your eyes were fixed on Simon as he stopped to talk to several of the men standing guard. Even though he was speaking with the men, his dark eyes searched the room, no doubt looking for you. As the person in front of you moved aside you were still transfixed on tracking Simon's movements and didn't notice till the woman keeping track of the points called out. "(y/n), sweetheart are you ok?". You shake your head as your are jarred from your thoughts.
"Shit.." you cursed taking a quick step forward, bringing Deacon with you. "I'm so sorry Mary…" You apologize as you set your basket up on the table. Mary was a kindly but very tired woman of about 65. In the old world she ran a small dress shop the next town over from where you grew up, she fitted and sold your prom dress. This world had been hard on her, she lost all of her family. One by one. Some from the virus in the start of all this, some to the dead and well the her son died in an early attack against the Saviors by another community. It wasn't long before Deacon was born when it happened and in her own way Mary had taken you and your son under her wing. Helping you with what she could and always keeping Deacon with her in the market while you worked. She was Deacon's 'Memaw' and she adored her 'Bubba' a nick name that she bestowed up on your son as an infant because he was a chubby baby. Now even you called him that (or some variation of it) quite often.
"Don't worry about it, you look like you have had a good day though… all these clothes." She noted with a little chuckle as she pulled each item of clothing out of the basket and marking it's value on a scrap piece of paper. Having become so close to Mary and knowing her a bit from before, you had confided in her the truth about Deacon's father being Negan not long after he was born. She kept your secret for all that time, helped you raise Deacon like her own grandchild even knowing who his father was. As she pulled out the new clothes, the ones too expensive for workers Mary let out a little gasp before quickly bringing her hand to her mouth trying to mask her shocked expression. "No.." She mumbled in a low voice.
"Go see Memaw…" You tell Deacon and the little boy smiled brightly before his hand slipped from yours and he raced around the table. Deacon crawled into her waiting lap as Mary gave your raven haired little boy a kiss on his chubby cheek.
Mary glared up at you with a look only a mother could give, "Don't think you are going to distract me with him… you didn't go back to him, did you?" She finished her sentence in a low voice as you glanced to see where Simon was. Thankfully he was stopped by some workers who needed him for some reason.
Guessing you had at least another few minutes you leaned down on the table. "Negan figured it out, well he had some fucking help.. but he knows. He said he is going to take care of me and Deacon…" You answer her softly a you reach across the table and push some of Deacon's hair out of his eyes. "I don't really know what to make of any of this or know what the hell will happen now." Mary gave a little nod and you could tell she too was troubled by this situation.
Putting her hands over Deacon's ears, she leaned forward and gave her take on the situation. "Well he fucking better, he made you feel worthless and did nothing but grunt on top of you till he put this little angel in your belly. Made you so afraid of him that you ran, tail between your legs pregnant, scared and alone… oh I would love to give him a piece of my mind..:" You held back the urge to roll your eyes but you did shake your head at her comments. She pulled her hands away from Deacon's ears and kissed the top of his head.
Mary was about to continue going on about one thing or another but you put your hand up, spotting finally making a path straight towards you. "Just mark the points Mary…" Your heart races, Simon always made you nervous. You beckoned Deacon back to you silently as Simon reached ear shot.
He had a fake smile plastered across his face but his tense body langue told you he was upset about whatever had transpired with Negan. He swaggered over to the table, his thumbs hooked into his belt loops on his jeans as he stopped next to the table, his eyes glance first at the pile of clothes that Mary was finishing tallying up and placing back into the basket and then to you. His lips twisted into a genuine smirk when he saw you grip Deacon's shoulder's tighter. "Well, I see you follow instructions well still.." Simon noted with a dark chuckle. "When you are ready… he is.."
You gave a small nod and leaned forward picking up the basket up from Mary's table. The white haired woman placed her hand over yours as you gripped the basket. "Don't forget about that Fire Truck that Deacon always likes to play with…" Mary said loud enough for Simon to take notice and glance over at the stall next to Mary's where an middle aged man named Ian crafted wooden toys for the children of the Sanctuary. Simon turned around and picked the medium sized red wooden toy off the table and took a few steps over to Deacon.
Leaning down, in a rare moment of humanity, Simon smiled and handed it Deacon who gazed wide eyed up at him as his small arms wrapped around the toy as large smile spread across his face. "Here you go buddy…" Simon chuckled softly as he took a step back and glanced up at you. "Even with the end of the world… every little boy loves a good fire truck." He seemed somewhat relaxed by seeing Deacon's joy, letting out a heavy sigh he almost started speak once more but stopped himself. Ending up only clearing his throat.
Leaning down you whispered in Deacon's ear. "Say thank you to Simon…"
Simon's eyes fixed on Deacon as the little boy took a few steps over to him and looked up at him with his wide hazel eyes. "sank ju…" Deacon said joyfully as he held up his fire truck. You couldn't help but smile brightly as Simon reached down and tussled the toddler's dark hair.
"You are very welcome young man…" Simon glanced up at you, when he saw the large smile spread across your face and your eyes lighting up seeing your little boy's joy, his eyes became transfixed on you. Simon had his moments where he seemed like a decent sort of guy, not unlike the men you grew up around. Rough around the edges but with a soft gooey center. Other times though, he scared you half to death. He was Negan's right hand man from way back, even in your early days as a wife. Back then he was the only person to have been kind to you when you married Negan, scared and alone in this world. There were moments where you wondered if being his wife would be better or worse than being Negan's.
As you lifted the basked off the table and walked towards Simon you turned back for a moment and smiled at Mary. "I will come talk to you tonight, after Bubba is asleep Mama Mary.." She gave you a little nod and blew Deacon a kiss.
"I love you my sweet boy!" She called to Deacon as she waved to him.
Deacon smiled back and in his sweet little voice exclaimed "Lub ju Memaw…" with a bright smile running across his lips as he attempted to still hold onto his fire truck, which seemed massive in his little arms, and wave goodbye at the same time.
You spied a soft smile playing on Simon's face as he watched the exchange between Mary and Deacon, as you walked up next to him. Much to your surprise he stretched out his arm, "Let me," He said almost gentlemen like, as he took the full basket of clothes from your arms not waiting for you to answer.
"Thank you," You utter softly as you reach down and place a gentle hand on your son's shoulder urging him forward as Simon started to lead the way back out of the marketplace.
Simon walked in silence for a time, occasionally looking over at you like he was going to start a conversation but always stopping himself short. As much as you had seen Simon around over the years you knew little about his life before all this. Some of the people talked about nothing but the old world, some people never said a syllable about their old life. "Did you know Mary was a seamstress, before all this?" You finally asked Simon, wanting to break the uncomfortable silence on the long walk back to Negan's room.
Simon gave a little, half hearted nod like he almost didn't want to admit to the knowledge. "Yeah…" He said simply before glancing over at you. "What did you do?" He asked.
You smile nervously slightly embarrassed of the job you had before all this. "I worked at the Kitty Kat Klub…" You mumbled, you cheeks flushing. The Kitty Kat Klub was the local strip club a few towns over. It was about as classy as a rural strip club that catered to farmers and truckers could get, but anyone who lived anywhere within 50 miles knew of it. Simon raised a suspicious eyebrow at you answer and it only caused your cheeks to grow more crimson. "I was one of the bar tenders… don't get your fucking hopes up… I can't dance to save my life."
Simon let out a hearty chuckle as he shook his head. "Well, I would have never expected that… not in a million years." Your cheeks were still flushed red and you grateful on some level that Deacon had little idea of what you two were talking about.
"Well, I worked in assisted living group home during the day, but it was shit money and only part time. I had bills…" You admitted though you knew that you had no reason what so ever to justify the actions of your past life to Simon, you still couldn't abide people having the wrong impression of you. "What about you?" Tilting you head slightly to the side as you spoke.
Simon chuckled and shook his head. "Just a normal guy… work… life…" His vagueness didn't deterred you. Take a step sideways, positioning yourself next Simon, so you didn't have to speak so loudly, you smile at him.
"Well, did you have a family?" Simon glanced at you as he spoke, there was a great deal of pain behind his eyes as he gave a quick nod before glancing down at Deacon who was totting along, spinning one of the wheels happily. I bet he had a little boy, it would explain so much…I am so fucking blind… shit.. You silently scold yourself. "I'm sorry." You say barely audible.
Simon shook his head slowly as he began. "Everyone has lost people these days, (y/n), if you let yourself die with them… living constantly in memories of the dead you will die too." His words cut into your soul, and for a brief moment you gazed up at Simon with reverence in your eyes. He had so much more to him than his creepy advances and his quick temper. There was a certain intelligence to the way he spoke, that was something you had always noticed. He was educated but chose not show it more often than not. The more you interacted with him the more of mystery he became to you.
"That's true…" You say nodding your head as you round the last corner before Negan's rooms. Stopping for a moment you reached out and placed a tender touch on Simon's arm. "But if the past didn't matter… why tell Negan?" You asked bluntly as you reached out and touched his muscular arm again.
Simon looked away for a brief moment, his eyes fixated on the door to Negan's room before glancing back down at you. "Because I know what it's like to have your child hidden from you…right under your nose…and not know before it was too late." As he spoke your face dropped and there was part of you that felt horrible for Simon and wondered what happened but knew it was not your place to press the issue. "I saw you struggling to take care of the boy.." Simon said in a low tone leaning in and handing you back the basket as he spoke. "I am sure you have you reasons and they are probably damn good reasons too." His eyes lock on yours as he speaks, his gaze causing you heart to quicken. "but the kid deserves a chance to know his father…and you both deserve a better life.." His words sent a strange chill down your spine. Who does he think can give us this better life truly… I doubt he thinks it's Negan… You muse as Simon's hand brushes your lower back as he ushered you toward the door not giving you a moment's chance to respond to his comment.
As Simon pushed open the heavy door your eyes went right to Negan, who stood by the window carefully overseeing some of the workers preparing to leave the compound. Simon cleared his throat and Negan quickly turned around. His eyes went straight towards Deacon clutching his new toy. A smiled crept across his face as he made his way towards you and Deacon. Simon leaned in and whispered. "You deserve the fucking world don't settle for less." His words only confirmed your previous gut feeling about Simon's intentions. You smiled softly at him.
"Thank you Simon…" You said softly, as you reached over, your finger tips brushing his bare forearm.
Simon smirked at your touch, "Any time sweetheart," he said with a small chuckle before glancing over at Negan who was standing watching the small exchange between you and Simon with a slightly sour look on his face. "Anything else boss?" He asked in a light hearted tone which Negan found none to amusing.
Negan shook his head and reached down to rest his hand on Deacon's shoulder. "No…" Negan said in a dark tone. If you didn't know better you would have almost guessed Negan was jealous of the small bit of affection you had shown Simon. No, there is no way Negan would be jealous of Simon. I am not Negan's wife any more. Your eyes darted between the two men. Tension was thick in the air as Simon stood almost staring Negan down.
As he went to leave Simon turned back to you, "I'll be around if you need help later." He made sure his words were loud enough for Negan to hear.
"I am sure we can manage Simon," Negan responded back quickly. You took a step away from Simon, feeling the tension rise.
Taking a deep breath you move towards Deacon who was standing in front of Negan. "It's a nice offer but Negan is right, we can mange." You say in a calm tone trying to do your best to calm the situation. Simon gave you a worried looked but you just gave him a quick nod, and with that he turned and left. Letting the heavy door slam shut with a loud bang.
Negan rolled his eyes and let out a heavy sigh as he looked at you, his gaze instantly making you nervous. "Is there something going on between you two I should be fucking aware of?" Negan asked quickly and sharply. You quickly shook your head. "It doesn't look that way from where I am fucking standing…" He said in a low voice.
"Nothing is going on… not that it is any of your business if there was." You respond sharply setting the basket that was growing heavy in your arms on a nearby chair. As you turn around and place your hands on your hips. "What is it you used to tell us wives… What goes on when you're not here ain't your business…" Using his own words against him caused Negan to huff softly as he shook his head.
"Well fucking played." He conceded as he sat down on the large black couch. "But… since you are the mother of my only child… who you spend your time with. Who my son is around… Is my fucking business now." Negan leaned back on the couch, his long arms stretched across the back of the couch. "Come here buddy," Negan called to the toddler who turned around, still a little unsure of Negan. He took a little step forward and held out his fire truck showing it to his father.
"Uck!" Deacon exclaimed as he placed the fire truck in Negan's lap and patted his father's knee excitedly. "uck! Uck!" he repeated, each time his little hand made contact with his father's knee. Negan smirked and leaned forward slightly picking the wooden toy up.
"Truck…" Negan said slowly. "TR…uck" Deacon looked confused and made the same face that you had seen spread across Negan's face a thousand times, that deep solemn frown. The how dare you tell me I am wrong face. Negan noticed it too and tried to stifle a chuckle. "That face…" He started as he looked up at you with a little smile playing on his lips almost like that tense moment hadn't happened. "shit, he is my kid… that is more fucking proof that a DNA test…" You nodded slowly as you watched Deacon crawl up on to the couch next to Negan, his little legs kicking frantically as he tried to pull himself up.
Deacon slid back off the couch unable to get up on his own, frustrated he looked up at Negan and demanded "Halp" as he threw his arms up. Negan leaned forward and picked Deacon up helping him get up on the couch next to him. Once up on the couch Deacon reached over and picked up his truck showing it to Negan again. "Uck…" He said with a little smirk and Negan just shook his head as Deacon started to play with the truck quietly.
Standing across the coffee table, leaning back against the chair with your basket of clothes resting on the seat you smiled. "The fire truck made his day…" Negan looked up and smiled softly at your comment.
"Good.." He said simply as he leaned back watching Deacon play next to him out of the corner of his eye for a few seconds before eyeing the basket of clothes in the chair. "See you found clothes…" He was trying to be pleasant, but you could tell that Negan was still somewhat annoyed with the whole exchange with Simon.
"Thank you," You respond quickly remembering that he always liked to be thanked for his 'kindness'. His gaze was fixed on you as you stood wringing you hands nervously, unsure of what your place in this moment was.
Negan's tongue darted across his lips, something that you didn't think would still send a delightful tingle down your spine but, it did. He motioned for you to sit and without him needing to utter a sound you picked the basket up, set it on the floor and sat down in the chair. All in one quick movement, your eyes wide and darting between Negan and your son. Letting a out barely audible huff Negan settled back in on the corner of the couch. "You look little red riding hood trapped in a room with the big bad wolf.." He said with a tone of dark humor in his voice.
You scoff softly and suppress the intense urge to roll your eyes. "Isn't that your thing though… Negan is the big bad… so give me half your shit and fall the fuck in line." Negan almost looked surprised at your defiant tone, but you had heard the workers talk. You had few friends left beyond Mary, but you listened to all the conversations people had. The workers feared Negan, with more than enough reason. "If that is not the persona that you want to put out there you need reevaluate how you handle shit…" You swallow hard knowing that what you had just said more than likely hit a nerve with the father of your child but after all this time you needed to get it off your chest.
Negan gave a shrug and a little laugh. "Well it's not a bad reputation to have…" He mused tilting his head to the side and raising an eyebrow as you shook your head disagreeing with him.
"It is the worst kind to have. Yeah people fear you but that rarely works out well long term if my memory of history class serves me well." Bringing your hand to your face you pinch the bridge of your nose and take a deep breath. "You said you wanted to know if anything was going on between me and Simon…which there isn't…" you start slowly, "because you wanted know who you son was around." Letting out a heavy sigh as your pull your hand away and stare Negan straight in the eyes. "Maybe look in the mirror and look at the type of man that wants to try and come in and start dictating how I raise my son…" Deacon looked up from his play and straight at you as he heard the tone in your voice grow with anger. It was something he rarely heard from you.
Negan went to speak but this time you put your hand up. "No, fuck no…" You said frustrated. "I am trying to raise a good kid. With some kindness in his heart in this fucked up work… and Simon was kind to me, kind to you son today… so I was kind to him and what you got jealous or some shit…" You put your hands up as you shake your head completely frustrated with Negan in that moment. "Which if you are jealous then that's your problem because if you taking care of your son comes with trappings of being your wife again then just forget about us… really because I can't live like that." You sunk back into the chair and covered your face with your hands not wanting to see Negan's reaction.
You guessed he was going to be angry but when there was a long silence and you heard Negan stand up from the couch. His boots hitting the concrete floor as he walked over and pulled your hands off your face forcing you to look up at him. "You're right." He said simply. "You're not my wife any more…" His hand slipped away from you face as he took a step back and watched as Deacon went back to playing though he would occasionally stop and glance at you. "I fucked that up and I don't remember how to be quite honest." He turned back to you and held out his hand. "I am not asking you to give me a second chance with you, but let me have a chance with my son…" You couldn't argue with his point, Deacon needed a father and he was lucky enough to still have his around.
Taking his hand you give him a little nod, "I will do my best." You say with a small smile and Negan gave you a little nod as his large, rough hand slipped from yours.
"Well that's a fucking start." Negan said with a little laugh before joining Deacon on the couch. You watched from afar as Negan joined his son in playing with the fire truck. Negan made promises of more toys for him to play with in the morning and that made Deacon the happiest that you had ever seen him. Nothing but laughter and joy came from your son's lips that evening while he played with his father.
Negan had dinner brought in for the three of your, it was quite and pleasant as far as meals go. Deacon sat between you and Negan doing his best to get the spaghetti into his mouth with is fork but before you had a chance to help him Negan had already leaned in and switched his fork out for a spoon. He really is a good dad, why couldn't he be a shit dad. One that really didn't take the fucking time… It was such a storm of conflicting emotions in your mind all through the night.
After dinner Negan suggested watching a movie with Deacon and when you told him Deacon had never seen a movie or even tv Negan proclaimed "Well it's about time, and it's a first I can be there for.." He pulled out a dvd copy of the old Disney animations version of Robin Hood and placed it in the dvd player as he turned on the tv. Deacon was playing with his beloved fire truck on the floor near the couch and one the menu popped up Negan turned around and scooped the little boy up. "Come on buddy, we are gonna watch a movie…" He said with a cheerful tone in his voice as he set Deacon down on the couch and joined him. "Come on (y/n)… let's play happy fucking family…"
"Alright.." You say softly as you pile the dinner plates together and brush your hands off on your jeans. Slowly you walked over to the couch and sat down next to Deacon. Negan's arm rested along the back of the couch, his finger tips brushing against the back of your neck as you settled in as the movie started.
Neither one of you said much during the movie, you both were transfixed on Deacon's wide eyed and enthusiastic expressions as he watched the first parts of the movie. Nearly 30 minutes into the film though you watched as your little boy hunkered in next to his father. Deacon let out a little yawn as he rested his head against Negan's white cotton t-shirt clad chest as he started to fall to sleep. Negan wrapped his arm around him and kissed the top of his head. It was such a sweet moment that you couldn't help but smile watching it unfold.
Once Deacon was fast asleep you looked over at Negan, who for the first time was holding his sleeping son in his arms, and he looked so at peace. "I'm glad he seems to have taken to you so well…" You say softly as you lean back against the opposite arm of the couch from Negan.
He smiled softly and let out a hushed chuckle. "I was worried to be quite fucking honest," You didn't want to admit it but you had your own fears. "This was more than hoped for…" He said nodding towards the sleeping boy in his arms.
The smile on your lips grows. "Deacon is a cuddle bug." Negan smirked as you scooted closer so you wouldn't have to speak so loudly. "When he was a baby, I couldn't put him down… at all." You leaned down and placed a kiss on your sleeping son's cheek before sitting back up. "Everywhere I went I carried him in this sling Mama Mary made me out of some curtains or something… but he was a fussy baby, worried me a lot."
"Mama Mary?" Negan asked softly raising an eyebrow.
"Mary, the little old lady that keeps track of the clothing… she used to have a dress shop about 15 minutes from here.." You explain and as you mention the dress shop there was something that rattled free and Negan seemed to recall who you were referring to.
"Her shop had some nursery rhyme type fucking name right?" He asked obviously recalling a long forgotten memory. You nod a little.
"Mary's Garden.." You said softly and Negan gave a firm nod in return.
"My wife got her bridesmaids dresses there… they were fucking hideous, well so were the bridesmaids." He said with a dark laugh and you couldn't help but chuckle. It was rare that Negan spoke of his wife, Lucille, you only know only knew her name because he would moan it when he was fucking you and then apologize always saying you look like her.. his voice rang out in your mind.
Shaking you head a little from your own memories you reached out and touched Deacon's back. "I really should get him into bed," You went to pick him but Negan shook his head.
"Please…" He asked almost begging and you gave him a silent nod of approval. He smiled back to you softly. "I hope you don't mind… but I did have some of the guys set up a better room for you and Deacon…"
You let out a half chuckle half sigh as you stood up pick up Deacon's fire truck and walking over the basket full of clothes still sitting undisturbed on the floor next to the chair. "And you had them bring our things up…" You finished looked back as Negan stood up, Deacon's head resting on his shoulder as his father carried him.
"You know me so well darlin'… are you sure you don't want to give this marriage thing another go?" He said in a joking tone but still you rolled your eyes and shook your head as you went to open the door. "Give me time… I'll work some magic on ya yet.." He teases walking through the door first leading the way.
"Get in line.." You quip back as you close the door slowly making sure not to let it slam and wake your sleeping son. Negan chuckled at your comment causing Deacon to stir and you instinctively shh him.
"Did you just fucking shh me?" Negan asked softly with another chuckle which made Deacon stir again.
Your eyes grew wide as you stood with Deacon's fire truck tucked under one arm and the basket, growing heavy, in the other. "Can save the arguments for after you showed us where we live now please…before he wakes up." You nod with you head towards Deacon.
Negan nods and starts walking down the hall to a room only a few doors down from his. "I know it's close, but it was one of the few open rooms with enough space…" Negan explain as you went to open the door. Negan flipped the light switch and let out a small sigh of relief when he saw it was good order.
It was a decent sized room, with another room attached off to the side. "You have your own space…" Negan said as he set Deacon down in the crib located just outside the door that led into your bed room. Everything was set up like a little home. It was better than you could have ever hoped for. There was a small kitchen, a fridge, even a few toys already in a toy box near the crib where your son now slept. "I left the finer points of decoration up to you but the basics are here… there should be food in the fridge." Negan explained as you stood with the basket in your arms in awe of it all.
"Thank you, this is really lovely Negan.." you said softly setting the basket on a small end table. It wasn't anything fancy by old world standards but it was a vast improvement than where you lived before.
Negan looked at you and smiled softly as he walked back over to the crib where Deacon slept and ran his hand along his son's cheek. "It's nothing." He said softly as he turned around and walked back towards you. He placed a gentle hand on your shoulder as he began to speak once more. "Just worry about taking care of him, he is all that matters now." Negan's words tugged at your heartstrings and made your cheeks flush slightly.
Taking a deep breath he leaned in and gave you a nervous peck on the cheek. "Goodnight, (y/n)."
The feeling of his lips against the soft skin of your cheek was something you have never felt before. Even during his late night visit he rarely kissed your lips and nothing so tender as a peck to the cheek. You could feel your cheeks flush slightly as he moved towards the door. "Goodnight, Negan… see you in the morning." You wave a little nervously as he walks out the door closing it as quietly as he possibly could on his way out.
Letting out a heavy sigh you mumbled, "What a fucking day.." As you picked up the basket of clothes off the end table and walked into your bedroom. It had a rare Queen sized bed, dressers and even a small vanity. Which made you chuckle. "This was better than my room as his wife… thanks bubba.." you giggled setting the basket on the dresser.
Pulling one of the drawers open you find a light blue summer night dress neatly folded laying alone in the drawer like someone had placed it there for you to find. Picking it up you felt the soft silk against you skin. Pulling off you dirty tank top and pushing your jeans down as you kicked of you boots you pulled the silk night dress over your now naked frame. It had been since you were Negan's wife that you felt silk against your skin and you hated to admit the fact that you missed it.
There was a soft knock on the door to the main room. Looking around you had hoped whomever left you the night gown also thought to leave you a robe. Pulling back the door to the bedroom as the second soft knock echoed through the rooms, you found a deep navy bath robe and slipped it on. As you walked to open the door you quickly tied it shut. "Who the fuck could it be now…" You mummer as you turn the door knob and pull open the door.
Standing before you, leaning against the door frame holding a bottle of rum in one hand and two glasses in the other was Simon, with small smirk playing on his lips. "Fancy a drink?" He said wiggling the bottle of rum in his hand and after the day you had, you could really use a stiff drink. You usher him in and he smiled like the cat the got the canary as he walked trough the door. "Now I am gin man personally… but I will make an exception for a good rum and a little birdie…"
"Mary…" You quickly pointed out knowing that no one else would know that kind of information about you.
"Yes Mary…" He said with quite chuckle. "Told me rum is your favorite…and you while beautiful, look like a woman who needs a drink… and maybe a good fuck?" He said with a laugh to mask the more than likely serious offer of sex. It made you laugh and you grabbed his arm and started to pull him towards the bedroom making him get a little excited. "Well fuck… I was joking sweetheart but if you really want to, I will make that sacrifice…" His dark eyes roamed up and down your bathrobe covered frame and you just shook your head as you pulled him into the bedroom and pushed the door almost shut.
"Deacon is asleep…" You said sharply as Simon set the two glasses on the dresser and poured you both a drink.
"Sorry… got my fucking hopes up a little bit there…" He said in a kind tone as he handed you your drink. "To getting a life you deserve…" He said as he lifted his glass. You raised yours to meet his and touched the two glasses together before you downed the entire glass in one swig causing Simon to chuckle. "Oh where have you been all my life."
"Five miles down the road from here…" You said with a little laugh. Simon made you laugh, more than Negan ever did. His eyes lit up as you chuckled at his jokes that night. There was nothing but a few drinks and Simon trying to lighten the mood for you both. After 3 drinks you both sat on the end of your bed.
Empty glass in hand and you turned to Simon let you a long sigh. The alcohol had made you bold enough to ask him something you had wanted to know all day and you had hoped that Simon being more than a few drinks in would answer you. "Simon…" You started slowly.
"Yes my darling girl.." He said with a flirtatious smirk.
"What happened today… when you came in with Gavin?" You asked softly almost a little nervous to learn the answer.
Simon groaned and fell back on to your bed. He brought his hands to his face as he spoke. "They slaughtered them all… all gone darling… killed…wiped the fuck out…" You turned around and laid down on the bed on your stomach and looked at him with a worried look painted across your face.
"What you mean Simon?" You ask nervously as you pick up on of his hands from his face so he could look at you when he finally answered.
"Some group attacked us… killed our people…" The words scared you in a way out didn't know you could be afraid as your processed what that meant. You had always figured it was a matter of time before something happened, Negan pissed off the wrong people and there would be causalities. Simon could see the panic growing on your face and reached out, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you close to him. "Don't you fucking worry darlin'…" He said softly looked down at you, his eyes slightly glazed from the alcohol. "I am never…ever gonna let these fuckers hurt you or that baby… I'll kill them all, one by fucking one before they even get a chance to have an idea.." His tone was low and dark but in that moment, in the low light, late at night. The idea that Simon would kill to keep you and Deacon safe seemed the most romantic thing anyone could have said to you in that moment. You wrapped your arms around Simon and just smiled softly against his chest.
You didn't say anything more, you didn't do anything more, but that night you and Simon feel asleep in each other's arms. It was the first time in as long as you can remember when you didn't go to bed afraid of what would happen in the night.