"Three missed calls… what do you want Evil Veronica?" Logan mumbled drunkenly as he lay back onto his bed in the Neptune Galaxy Resort Hotel as he stared at his phone. She certainly wasn't His Veronica… the one he'd danced with, the one he had made love to, the one he'd fallen asleep with nestled beside him. No... This Veronica was the wicked witch who had come and replaced his beautiful girlfriend in the middle of the night.

Wicked witch? Evil Bitch? Yep… you are now drunk Logan…

God he wanted her back. How could this hurt so damn much? This had been the first time he'd risked caring for anyone since Lilly had been murdered.

"You want this huh?" he mused to himself as he held the small green leather notebook in his hand.

Of course she did, why else would she even bother to try and contact him? It's not like she loves me…

He hadn't been able to work up the courage to read it yet, but the pages smelled of her perfume. The one she'd wore that night of Homecoming when she'd been wearing that teal silk dress and he'd pressed her against his body…

Why was this happening to him?

He'd left his mother a quick message earlier telling her that he was staying with Duncan, since his friend still seemed to be pissed at him over taking Veronica to Homecoming, he figured it was as safe an alibi as any.

She still sided with her dad… she hadn't forgiven him for their falling out, and she wasn't sorry she had abandoned him. Lilly was gone… and now so was she.

Did he really want to read the thoughts of the girl who had fallen in love with him and stolen his heart when he knew he'd lost her?

If he closed his eyes he could almost see her straddling him and feel her lips against his… he'd never known that just kissing a woman could make him feel so damn near delirious. She had seduced him… now he couldn't get her off his mind.

Dear Diary,

As part of my recommended recovery, the lovely Dr Sorrell says I should start a journal… so hey, its me, Veronica, Veronica Mars, and here is the first day of my life. My new life, because I can't remember the old one... just this endless panic attack, like I'm drowning and this constant overwhelming fear that something terrible is about to happen, like my old life is coming after me and no one knows how to fix it.

I wish I knew what was wrong with me, Dr Sorrell assures me that feelings aren't like memories, you can't just pull them out of a file, or a photograph, they have to be earned, so this "personal ownership" I don't feel over all these things Keith Mars and Wallace Fennell keep showing me doesn't mean that I won't be able to get those feelings back eventually. It's like this is all a game, and I haven't been told what the rules are.

She has advised me that I shouldn't try and spend all my energy trying to dissect who I was, because if dwell too much then I'll never be free to live as the person I am now… and that I can't pretend to be someone that I am not, someone who that they think I should be, but who I am right now is terrified, I'm always terrified. I never wanted any of this, but there's nothing I can do about it. I'm broken.

I don't know why everyone is just so scared to say it, I am… I'm fractured, and there's this piece missing… and I have to find it, I have to find Logan… it feels like he's the only safe space and I know when I find him that it should all start with him… there has to be a reason why he's the only thing that didn't disappear.

Logan ran his fingers over the words, he hadn't ever really considered in those first few weeks what it must have been like for her to wake up so scared, and he'd avoided her.

"If she was going to remember something… couldn't it have been something important?" Logan had asked Ms James.

"Have you considered that for Veronica… maybe she did remember something that she thought was important?" Ms James had told him.

The journal continued like that for a few pages as he watched her try and piece things together, she grew more confident and sarcastic as time went on, she'd thought he was a jerk at times but there was always this need to get to know him…

Although… speaking of crushes. I think I might have one on Logan Echolls… but that would be messy and complicated.

Then she started to dig to try and figure out why Logan wasn't in her life anymore, why Keith Mars had lost his job as Sheriff… there was the trouble she had with the Recovered Memory Therapy… an assault?

It was hard to dislike Keith Mars when you saw him through his daughters eyes, when he could read about the kind of father he was… Logan had never had anything like that.

How could he ever had expected her to give him up? Even if he had been wrong…

Then he got to the part when Veronica had started to look into Lilly's death to discover what had happened… he wasn't sure if he should continue, he didn't want to have to see her experience that loss all over again.

I finally made myself watch that crime scene video. Wallace tells me I was there in person the night her body was discovered, I can almost feel the metallic taste on my tongue.

Someone erased Lilly Kane from existence, the split the left side of her skull right open.

Logan Echolls might think that both of the girls in that homecoming picture are dead, but one of them is still here… and she's going to find out the truth.

I still don't know why someone like Abel Koontz would confess to something he didn't do… it makes no sense!

Logan felt like someone had just poured cold water over him, he'd always assumed that Veronica's complete faith that the Sheriff's Department had arrested the wrong man had been because she had been blinded by misplaced sentiment for her father… but here she'd had no such ties... she couldn't remember them… no preconceptions… and she had still drawn the same conclusions?

He'd started to sober when he got to the parts when she had begun to collect evidence.

So I think Lilly and Weevil might have had a relationship at some point…

He had been right… Lilly had been seeing someone else. He hadn't been crazy.

Weevil?

His head was spinning and then he got to the part about their first date.

Dear Diary,

Tonight had been completely unexpected... If there was such a thing as a perfect night I never want to forget… it was tonight. Logan Echolls… you are stealing my heart.

She had loved him…

How could Veronica have read this journal and still have rejected him today? But then Logan realised the truth… it was because she'd always known something he'd assumed was a lie, Lilly's murder was being covered up. He'd been wrong.

Who had killed Lilly Kane?