Hey everyone! Thanks so much for all your support for this story! I've really enjoyed writing it. I'm sorry that there's not much Rachel POV in this chapter, but this was a very Finn centric episode. I did add on a Finchel scene as always :) I really miss having Finchel scenes on the real Glee.

And how do you guys like Lea's album? I think it's great! One of my best friends (FinchelQuick34 - go read her stories!) got to go to Lea's meet and greet! I'm hoping Lea does one near me eventually!

Anyway, enjoy this chapter and review if I should keep going!

Chapter 26: Grilled Cheesus

Finn was hungry.

His mom wasn't home, so he decided to make himself a grilled cheese sandwich. When he pulled the sandwich out of the oven, he couldn't help but notice a strange design on it. It looked like Jesus's face.

Well, at least he thought it was Jesus's face from pictures he'd seen. He and his mom had never really gone to church. He wasn't sure if God existed, but if God did exist, could this be God appearing?

Finn figured if this was God, he'd try talking to God. He ate the part of the sandwich without the face of God on it, and then started talking to the other part. What was he supposed to say? "Dear Grilled Cheesus, first of all, you're super delicious." Well, that was true. He'd always loved grilled cheese sandwiches. Now what should he ask for? Then it came to him. The football team had a bad year last year, so it would be nice to start the season off with a win. "Please, Grilled Cheesus, please let us win our first football game. It would mean so much to Artie, and I think you kind of owe it to him. I mean, you did sort of screw him in the leg department. And in return, Cheesy Lord, I'll make sure we honor you this week in Glee Club."

x

The football game... well, Finn couldn't remember the last time one of their games had gone that well. They lost all their games freshman year and only won one sophomore year. The one they won sophomore year, they only won by one point.

Maybe they were doing well today because Coach Beiste worked them hard, but maybe God was real, and he had been listening to Finn? Finn scored a touchdown and pointed to Rachel like he promised. And the look on her face when he did it was pretty priceless. When the final score went up, Finn couldn't believe how much they'd won by. He fell to his knees and looked up at the sky. "Thank you, Grilled Cheesus!"

x

Finn had said that if his prayers were answered, he'd offer to repay God by having them singing religious songs in glee club. He didn't actually know any religious songs, but he thought that other people in Glee might. "Mr. Schue?" Finn said at the beginning of the glee meeting. "I have something to say. Something happened to me, and I can't really get into it, but it's shaken me to my core."

"Oh, my God, he's coming out," Puck said.

Finn tried to hold in his annoyance. "Why, yes, there is a man who's sort of recently come into my life, and that man is Jesus Christ."

"That's way worse," Puck said.

"And I know there's others in here who dig him, too," Finn said. "And so I thought, maybe this week, we could pay tribute to him in music. You know, pay tribute to Jesus."

"Sorry, but if I wanted to sing about Jesus, I'd go to church," Kurt said. "And the reason I don't go to church is because most churches don't think very much of gay people. Or women. Or science."

"I don't see anything wrong with getting a little church up in here," Mercedes said.

"I agree," Quinn said. "I've had a really hard year, and I turned to God a lot for help. I, for one, wouldn't mind saying thanks."

"Thanks for what? That it didn't come out a lizard baby?" Santana asked.

"Whenever I pray, I fall asleep," Brittany mumbled.

"Well, guys, maybe our song selections don't have to be about Jesus," Mr. Schue suggested. "We could do songs about spirituality."

"You got a problem with Jesus?" Finn asked Puck. Puck was always talking about being Jewish...

"Oh, I got no problem with the guy," Puck said. "I'm a total Jew for Jesus. He's my number one Heb. What I don't like seeing is people using J-money to cramp everybody else's style, 'cause it seems to me that true spirituality or whatever you want to call it is about enjoying the life that you've been given. I mean, I see God every time I make out with a new chick."

"Okay, okay, that doesn't make any sense," Rachel said. "In fact, it's stupid."

Now Finn had an idea. He was kind of hoping that he and Rachel could move on to second base. Maybe that could be his next prayer.

When Finn got home, he got the Grilled Cheesus out of the refrigerator. "What up, Grilled Cheesus? I need to ask you for something. I didn't go to Sunday school so I don't know if God works the same as a genie and I only get three wishes, but here's the thing. Dating Rachel is great, but she's kind of a prude, and I'm sort of going crazy. Anyway, her boobs aren't that great, but they're still girl boobs, and I'd really like to touch them. So, Cheesus, considering that I've dedicated a week of my musical life to you, I hope you can see it in your heart to answer my prayers. Amen."

x

When Finn was at school the next day, he overheard Puck and Mike talking about Kurt's dad being in the hospital. That had to be a rumor, right? Kurt would tell him, right? Their parents were pretty serious with each other and they might end up being family...

As the end of day bell rang, Finn's phone rang. He looked at his phone and saw that it was his mom. He figured he'd have time to talk to her before the glee meeting, so he picked up the phone. "Hi Mom."

"Finn..." Carole began. She sounded upset.

"What's wrong, Mom?" Finn asked. Was she okay?

"Finn, Burt had a heart attack," Carole said.

Finn practically dropped his phone. "What?"

"He collapsed in his office this morning," Carole said. "I'm so sorry, honey. I tried to call the school to get a hold of you, but they wouldn't let me talk to you..."

Finn felt his heart beating fast. "Is he going to be okay?"

"I sure hope so, honey," Carole said. "I'm going to be at the hospital after school today. I'd have you come, but right now, they're only letting me and Kurt in. I'll try to come home late tonight."

"I'm so sorry, Mom," Finn said.

"I love you," Carole said.

"I love you too," Finn said.

Why hadn't Kurt told him? They'd seen each other today. Finn went to glee club and saw Kurt talking to Santana and Brittany. "What the hell happened?" Finn asked Kurt.

Kurt looked at Finn. "My dad's in the hospital."

Finn nodded. "I know. My mom just called me. I feel like I'm the last one to know!"

"Well, I'm sorry, Finn," Kurt snapped. "It didn't occur to me to call you, because he's not your father."

"Yeah, well, he's the closest I'm ever going to get, okay?" Finn protested. "I know it may not look like what everybody else has, but I thought we were sort of a family. Look, I guess I just... I didn't like overhearing other people talking about it in gym class." He sat next to Kurt, but Kurt jerked away when Finn patted his back.

Mr. Schue came in. "Hey, guys. Our thoughts are all with Kurt, and, uh, I know it's sort of hard to really focus on anything else..."

"Mr. Schue?" Mercedes asked.

"Yeah?" Mr. Schue asked.

"I've been struggling, trying to figure out what I wanted to say to Kurt all day, and I realize I don't want to say it, I want to sing it. This song is about being in a very dark place, and turning to God. It's a spiritual song, Mr. Schue. Is that okay?" Mercedes asked.

"It's fine," Mr. Schue said.

If Mercedes knew long enough to prepare a song, then why hadn't anyone had any time to tell Finn?

"Thank you, Mercedes," Kurt said after Mercedes finished singing. "Your voice is stunning, but I don't believe in God."

"Wait, what?" Tina asked.

'You've all professed your beliefs," Kurt said. "I'm just stating mine. I think God is kind of like Santa Claus for adults. Otherwise, God's kind of a jerk, isn't he? I mean, he makes me gay and then has his followers going around telling me it's something that I chose. As if someone would choose to be mocked every single day of their life. And right now I don't want a heavenly father. I want my real one back."

Finn did understand where Kurt was coming from. Lots of Christians were pretty intolerant of gay people.

Mercedes looked upset. "But Kurt, how do you know for sure? I mean, you can't prove that there's no God."

"You can't prove that there isn't a magic teapot floating around on the dark side of the moon with a dwarf inside of it that reads romance novels and shoots lightning out of its boobs, but it seems pretty unlikely, doesn't it?" Kurt shot back.

"We shouldn't be talking like this. It's not right," Quinn snapped.

"I'm sorry, Quinn," Kurt said. "But you all can believe whatever you want to. But I can't believe something I don't. I appreciate your thoughts... but I don't want your prayers."

x

After school, Rachel came over to Finn's house while Carole was at the hospital with Burt and Kurt. Rachel didn't want Finn to be alone right now, especially with everything that was going on. At the same time, she was wondering: where had Finn's sudden religious beliefs come from? After a snack, she went into Finn's room. "Finn, please sit."

"You're upset about Kurt's dad, too?" Finn asked.

"Yes. But more importantly, let's discuss your newfound love for Jesus and how it's affecting me." Then Rachel realized that was the wrong word choice. "I want this relationship to go the distance, but I need to know that when I'm 25 and I've won a bunch of Tonys, and I'm ready to have intercourse and babies, that those babies will be raised in a certain way."

Finn looked surprised. "You don't think you're gonna have sex till you're 25?"

Well, maybe she'd be ready for sex before she was 25. She hoped Finn wouldn't hold it against her. "I want my children to be raised in the Jewish faith. Both of my dads' peoples were slaves once. I need to know that my children will be free to worship in the way that I decide is right."

"Sure," Finn said. "Of course. Yeah, they should totally go to Jew church and wear those hats and and eat that salty orange stuff with their bagels."

Rachel gave Finn a kiss. The truth was, she didn't go to temple much herself either. "Let's lay down on the bed."

"Okay," Finn said.

Rachel and Finn lay on the bed, and then after thinking for a little, Rachel realized that maybe it was time. "Finn... I'd like to give you something in exchange for what you gave me," Rachel whispered, moving Finn's hand on to her breasts.

x

Finn couldn't believe Rachel had let him touch her breasts.

Not only had she let him touch them, she'd let him keep his hands on them for a while. She even told him that next time, she'd let him try it UNDER her bra. She was so awesome. Finn sat down in the locker room and got out the grilled cheesus. He'd had good luck so far, so maybe there was hope for being quarterback gain. "Cheesus, I don't need to tell you how much you rule. You've given me everything I've prayed for, and it turns out Rachel's boobs are really awesome. Anyway, I need another favor, so, Cheesus. I pray that I'm made quarterback again. Sam's a good dude, I just think that I can deliver your message to the world more powerfully if I'm the most popular guy in the school again."

Puck came in. "What are you doing?"

Oh crap. Finn began panicking. "Nothing. Eating. So I pray before I eat now, what's the big deal? You're not gonna tell anybody about this, are you?"

Surprisingly, Puck didn't make fun of Finn. "No. It's cool. To tell you the truth, I actually went to temple with my nanny yesterday. I know it makes me a wuss, but I'm bummed about Kurt's dad. I've kind of been praying for him. I know how hard it is not to have a father, you know? What do you pray for?"

Finn felt guilty. He should be praying for Burt. Puck and Kurt had never even really been friends, and he was probably Kurt's closest male friend. "Yeah. Same stuff."

"You burned your grilled cheese," Puck pointed out.

x

That evening, Finn and Rachel went to the park for a picnic. Finn wasn't sure why Rachel wanted to go out to the park, but any time with Rachel would be good. Besides, picnics reminded him of the first time he and Rachel kissed. As Rachel lay out their blanket and lit some candles, Finn turned to Rachel. "Why are we in the park?"

"Cause I don't want anything coming between us and God," Rachel said. "And because Yentl was outside when she sang this song in the movie. I just hope that God hears this song as a prayer for Burt Hummel and decides to bring him back to us." She began to sing.

God...
Our Heavenly Father,
Oh, God...
And my father, o is also in Heaven.
May the light
Of this flickering candle...
Illuminate the night
The way your spirit illuminates my soul...
Papa can you hear me?
Papa can you see me?
Papa, can you hear me
In the night
Papa, are you near me?
Papa, can you hear me?
Papa, can you help me not be frightened
Looking at the skies, I seem to see a million eyes
Which ones are yours?
Where are you now that yesterday has come and gone
And closed its doors?
The night is so much darker
The wind is so much colder
The world I see is so much bigger
Now that I'm alone
Papa, please forgive me, try to understand me
Papa, don't you know I had no choice?
Can you hear me praying, anything I'm saying?
Even though the night
Is filled with voices
I remember everything you taught m
Every book I've ever read...
Can all the words in all the books
Help me to face what lies ahead?
The trees are so much taller
And I feel so much smaller
The moon is twice as lonely
And the stars are
Half as bright
Papa, how I love you
Papa, how I need you
Papa, how I miss you
Kissing me
Good night...

"That's a Barbra song," Rachel said to Finn when she finished.

"I probably could have guessed," Finn said. He felt even more guilty now. Kurt had never been very nice to Rachel, but she was still thinking of him. "Maybe you could come to the hospital with me tomorrow..." He hadn't been to see Burt yet, and he was kind of nervous. Burt was becoming a father figure for him.

"Of course I'll come with you," Rachel said.

"Thanks," Finn said. "Rachel - do you think there's a God out there?"

"Well, my dads have taken me to both temple and church, but we don't pray very often," Rachel admitted. "I do like to think something's out there."

This seemed like the perfect opportunity to tell Rachel about the sandwich, but Finn decided not to. "Could you maybe sing that to Burt?"

"Of course," Rachel said.

x

And she did. The next afternoon, Rachel went along with Finn and his mom to the hospital to visit Burt, who was still in a coma. Rachel brought along both Quinn and Mercedes. The girls had talked and figured that one of them had to get a hold of someone.

As Rachel finished her song, Kurt came in. "What's going on in here?"

Rachel looked up. "We were just praying for your dad."

"Rachel, Quinn, and I are taking turns," Mercedes explained. "We're from different denominations and religions, so we figured one of us is bound to be right."

"I didn't ask you to do this," Kurt snapped.

"Honey, I know you're upset about what's happening, I get it, but friends help out, even when you don't ask," Carole told Kurt.

A woman with a headscarf came in. "Mr. Kurt Hummel?"

"Dude, why didn't you just tell us you wanted to pray in Muslim?" Finn asked.

"I'm not Muslim, I'm a Sikh," the woman corrected.

"She's going to see if acupuncture will improve the circulation to my dad's brain. Amazingly, needles pierce the skin better than psalms. Can you all please leave now?" Kurt asked.

"We just wanted to do something," Rachel said.

x

The week went by and Burt wasn't getting better. Carole insisted Finn go to his football game that week, but Finn had to admit once he got there, it was a nice distraction from everything.

"Red 42 on three," Sam said as the team circled up.

"Wait," Finn pointed out. "That cornerback's been cheating right all night. We should naked bootleg left."

"That ogre linebacker's on the left. He's been killing me all game," Sam said.

"Dude, trust me, I'm the only guy who's ever actually won a game on this field, Finn said.

"Okay, naked bootleg left, I keep on three. All right, you ready?" Sam asked.

The team continued to play when Finn noticed Sam get tackled. The umpire blew the whistle as Coach Beiste and some trainers ran to the field and began examining Sam. Finn ran over as well with the rest of the players.

"Is he okay?" Finn asked.

"His shoulder's dislocated," Coach Beiste said. "This is what happens when you change my plays in the huddle."

"I don't understand, that guy came out of nowhere," Sam moaned.

"I know, that kid's been cheating right all night. No reason for him to be there. It's just bad luck," Coach Beiste said.

"We need to get him to the ER," one of the trainers said.

"Okay, let's go." Coach Beiste turned to Finn. "It's in your hands now, Lurch. Congratulations, you're the quarterback again."

Oh no.

This wasn't how it was supposed to happen.

Finn didn't want Sam to get hurt. He wanted to get the position because he was good.

Now he had it, and it didn't feel very good.

x

At school on Monday, Finn went into Miss Pillsbury's office. "I have to confess something," he told the counselor. "I'm the reason Sam got hurt. I asked for three things to happen: one, for us to win our first football game; two, to get to second base with Rachel; and three, to be the quarterback on the football team again. All those three things happened because I prayed for them to Grilled Cheesus."

Miss Pillsbury looked confused. "Okay. Where to start?"

This was the first time Finn had told anyone about the sandwich. "No, no, I know it sounds crazy, but it isn't. Jesus appeared to me on a sandwich and it has special powers, I'm telling you, but I didn't mean for anybody to get hurt."

"Let's take a second, okay?" Miss Pillsbury said. "Look, first, you won the football game because you actually have a coach who spends the game watching the plays rather than biting his toenails. And God didn't let you touch Rachel's boobs. Rachel did."

"Just the sides of them, but wait, why would she do that?" Finn asked.

"Well, what were you doing right before you were touching them?" Miss Pillsbury asked.

Finn thought back. The main thing he remembered was that her boobs felt good. "I remember yawning. Right, 'cause we were talking about emotional stuff."

"Oh, yes, well, there you go, that's it," Miss Pillsbury said. "Girls like that. She felt close to you, thus the inappropriate touching. Uh, more importantly, you didn't hurt Sam. It was a 300-pound left tackle who just got expelled because he's on steroids and he's 23. God works in all kinds of mysterious ways, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't spend a lot of time trying to speak to us through sandwiches."

So Finn hadn't really found God? Maybe Kurt was right. Maybe there was no God. "You look disappointed," Miss Pillsbury pointed out.

"I am," Finn admitted. "It was sort of cool feeling like I had this direct line to God. Now I just feel like everybody else, you know, like we're all just floating around in space. I don't like that."

"You're not alone," Miss Pillsbury said. "The big questions are really big for a reason, they're hard. But you know what? Absolutely everybody struggles with them."

x

In Glee that afternoon, Finn offered to perform another song. He'd found this during his lunch period, and it summed up how he was feeling pretty well.

Finn: Oh life, it's bigger
It's bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no, I've said too much
I've said enough
That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no, I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try
Every whisper
Of every waking hour
I'm choosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt, lost and blinded fool, fool
Oh no, I've said too much
I've said enough
Consider this
Consider this, the hint of the century
Consider this, the slip
That brought me to my knees, failed
What if all these fantasies come
Flailing around
Now I've said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try
But that was just a dream
That was just a dream
That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no, I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try
But that was just a dream
Try, cry, why try
That was just a dream
Just a dream
Just a dream, dream

"I thought we couldn't sing songs about religion," Tina said.

"Evidently, we can't sing about faith, but we can sing about losing faith?" Mercedes added.

"That's sort of what I want to talk about today," Mr. Schue said. "Earlier in the week, Finn, it seemed like you felt differently."

"Well, I used to think God was up there looking over me. Now, I'm not so sure," Finn admitted. He went to sit next to Rachel. After Glee practice, Finn and Rachel went to Rachel's house.

"What's going on?" Rachel asked Finn. "Earlier in the week you were sure that God exists, and now you're not so sure?"

Maybe now would be a good time to tell Rachel. "Well, last week I made myself a sandwich and I thought I saw the face of God in it..." He showed Rachel the picture on his phone.

Rachel's eyes got big. "Wow."

"Yeah, wow," Finn said. "I thought that was some way of God speaking to me, if there is a God. Like wanting to have a connection with me. It's odd, I know."

"Finn, it's not odd," Rachel said. "We've all had our questions about God."

"I mean, God's supposed to be so powerful," Finn said. "It was as if he wanted to get to know me... and now I'm not so sure."

"You know, even though I have been to temple, I've had my doubts," Rachel said. "Lots of people pray for their friends and family members to overcome illnesses, and then they die."

"I know," Finn said. "Like people have been praying for Burt, but he's still in the hospital?"

"How's your mom?" Rachel asked.

"She already lost my dad, she doesn't want to lose Burt too," Finn said. "This is the happiest I've ever seen her."

Rachel gave Finn a hug. "I really hope your mom's found Burt's for her what you are for me."

"Me too," Finn said. "Kurt's still being distant. He talks to my mom at times, but he won't talk to me."

"This probably brings back bad memories for him," Rachel said. "His mom died, and it's just been him and his dad for so long."

"That's true," Finn said. For the longest time, it had just been him and his mom, and he couldn't imagine losing her.

"I don't think he's trying to hurt you, or any of us," Rachel said. "He's scared. When we're scared, we can sometimes not be at our best."

"You're so smart," Finn told Rachel.

"Look, you can always talk to me if you need me," Rachel said.

Finn and Rachel sat quietly for a moment when Finn's phone rang. He looked at the caller ID and saw that it was his mom. What if she had bad news?

Rachel looked on. "Whatever she says, I'm right here," Rachel said, kissing Finn softly.

Finn kissed Rachel's head and picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Finn!" Carole exclaimed. This sounded good.

"Hi Mom," Finn said.

"Finn, Burt woke up!" Carole said. "He opened his eyes and spoke when Kurt and I were there."

Finn smiled. He turned to Rachel, who could clearly hear what Carole was saying, and she looked pretty happy too.

"That's great!" Finn said.

"Would you like to come see him?" Carole asked.

"I'd love to!" Finn said. "I'll see you soon!" He smiled and hung up the phone. "Rachel, Burt woke up! Would you give me a ride to the hospital to see him?"

"That's great!" Rachel said, giving Finn a big hug. "Of course I will."

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