So, when I post chapter 25, it will have a bonus chapter associated (same POV).
Enjoy the chapter :-)
Entry 23It turns out that beach didn't stay too empty. Castiel found me, and I guess he wanted to talk.
"Hello, Keigh," said Castiel.
"Hi," I squeaked. "Are you and your friend okay?"
"Yes. What Anna did could hurt a weakened angel, but Uriel and I are both fine. You're not going into hiding with the Winchesters?"
"I was afraid you'd be mad if I disappeared. I don't want to die," I explained. "Um, Castiel, there's something I don't understand."
"Shoot for it," said Castiel.
"You were going to kill Anna just over something she did, but you're not killing me for what I am," I said.
"You didn't choose what you are," said Castiel. "God won't hold it against you."
"But Uriel called Ruby all those awful things, and she's not so much worse than me, is she?"
"Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart," said Castiel.
I looked at my shoes. "That's for humans," I said. "I'm an abomination. You should smite me where I am."
"Do you really think you deserve to die?" he asked.
"Yes," I said. I closed my eyes. I hoped it would be over quickly. Castiel seemed merciful. Just one big boom, I figured, and a lot of electricity, and I would be gone. One less monster in the world.
I soon realized that either it was over and I hadn't even noticed, or Castiel wasn't smiting me. I opened one eye. We were both still there.
"I'm not going to kill you, Keigh," said Castiel.
"Okaaay… why not? I know you don't trust me. I'm a demon's daughter. You're not stupid. Are you?"
"Who your parents are doesn't matter as much as who you are," said Castiel. "You have a choice to be good or bad. Choose wisely."
"If I pick to be good, I don't think my dad will like it," I said. "And if I pick to be bad, you'll kill me."
"You still have to choose," said Castiel.
"Okay, well, I want to be good, but I don't know how to do it," I said. "Everybody I know is bad. Well, mostly everybody."
"Keigh, I wish I knew all the answers to give you, but I don't," said Castiel.
That startled me. "But you're an angel."
"You should talk to God," said Castiel. "Ask Him to teach you how to be good."
"Won't He be mad? I don't think God wants to talk to somebody like me," I answered. "Besides, how will he hear me over everybody else?"
"God hears everyone that prays to Him," said Castiel.
"But how can that be? Unless He has a million brains or something."
"I don't know how it works," said Castiel. "I just know that it does. But- they say that God is somehow outside of time. I know He created everything, including Time, but I can't wrap my head around the idea of being outside of time any better than you can."
"Wow," I said. "But how can time exist and anybody not be in it? Wouldn't you be, like, frozen in one moment?"
"That would be being even more trapped by time. I would guess that God is somehow less trapped by time than we are."
"I can't figure that out," I said.
"Neither can I."
"Castiel?" I asked, feeling a little braver.
"Yes, Keigh?"
"How come Uriel wants to kill me, and you don't?"
"We are created beings with unique personalities, just as humans are. That means we don't always agree on everything."
"But is Uriel right, or are you?" I asked. "How do you know that you shouldn't just kill me?"
"What do you think?" asked Castiel.
"I told you, you should have killed me," I said. "I don't deserve to be talking to an angel right now. Besides, aren't you supposed to be helping humans, not talking to weird hybrid monsters?"
"You don't need to know my full orders," said Castiel. "It's been an interesting conversation." He stood up and turned to face the ocean. "I'll be watching you," he reminded me before disappearing.
I was an idiot and went straight home. More on that later.