Momentous Pranking
Disclaimer: Clearly, I don't own anything. I'm having fun and playing in this sandbox.
Who doesn't love a good prank? And a series of pranks? I mean, what kind of team would Coulson's team be if they didn't prank one another from time to time?
Also, I just love the idea that Antoine and Jemma are two epic pranksters who should never be allowed to team up with one another. There's something so strange and so right about them being devious and playful and going full out of their way to prank everyone (including each other).
Author's Note 1: The SPA is the headquarters that Tony Stark built specifically to be the new SHIELD headquarters.
Author's Note 2: A hack is basically a large-scale MIT prank. It usually involves things (vehicles, TARDISes, Daleks, etc.) being put on the top of buildings, stuff happening in the Infinite Corridor, or windows being lit up/being used to play Tetris.
Anyway, I hope that you all enjoy this!
1.
It was a well-known fact that Antoine Triplett could prank with the best of them. At least, it was a well-known fact among the Specialists of his graduating class from the Academy.
Coulson's team, not so much.
Jemma figured that bit out fairly quickly though. She had been the receptor of what went down as a pretty epic pie to the face one boring afternoon when they were all stuck at the Playground. The whip cream had originally been drawn in the shape of the UK flag and the colors had transferred over relatively well enough.
That being said, being caught by surprised by a pie to the face when opening up a supply cabinet in the kitchen was a shocker – and, in retrospect, a much needed stress-reliever.
Antoine wouldn't admit it, but the warpath that Jemma went on was intensely attractive. It was made even better by the fact that she had not even bothered to get completely cleaned up before starting the crack-down on retribution.
2.
Jemma Simmons could not lie to save her life. It was a character flaw and it was very much what it was. She was a genius and a highly-respected professional in her field. Her medical skills were second to none and Phil Coulson counted his lucky stars daily for having her on his side.
With that in mind, no one could imagine just how devious one woman could be, when she put her mind to it.
Absolutely no one knew precisely how they ended up with regularly short-sheeted beds or incredibly long-lasting temporary tattoos that appeared with no warning. The amount of security at the Playground was ridiculous and, because of that, it was nearly impossible to get away with the former on a regular occurrence or the appearance of the latter without tripping any number of surveillance around the facility.
Antoine, in particular, found himself the subject to a full and complete spectrum of very adorable temporary tattoos (a lot of My Little Pony and cute animals and a few Doctor Who) all over his torso and arms. He wasn't quite sure how to combat that.
3.
The team didn't think it could get worse.
It did.
Antoine and Jemma decided to team up and everything went to hell in the proverbial handbasket.
No one was safe, not even the great Melinda May. Oh, she didn't get it nearly as bad as Skye, Coulson, or Koenig did, but she certainly got her fair share of pranking. It was just far more creative – and devious – than what the others got.
She wouldn't tell anyone one, but turnabout was fair play.
After all, she knew that Jemma would figure out who was behind the shaving cream incident with Fitz all those months before. Melinda just knew that revenge was a long term thing and that it was best served cold – very cold.
4.
Fitz wasn't necessarily a target for pranking upon his immediate return to the team. Hill, however, was.
No one would own up to it, but Jemma felt a little bit of pride, when Agent Maria Hill found the hits of a certain Canadian pop singer programmed into all of her ringtones. The best part was that there was absolutely zero evidence pointing in her direction.
That was the greatest aspect of having a partner-in-crime when it came to pranking. Plausible deniability!
Besides, it couldn't hurt of Hill had something for Tony Stark to rib on her for, during her initial time with Stark's company. Robin Sparkle's songs were very catchy and it would be a shame for them to be hidden away.
5.
The moment that Skye and Fitz teamed up to prank back was something of a dangerous moment.
They had the DWARF drones. Skye was an expert hacker and Fitz was still a veritable genius. The pair complimented each other in ways that Fitz and Simmons never could. It could have ended with the utter humiliation of Antoine and Jemma.
Instead, the stakes just got upped.
Coulson and Melinda wisely stayed out of the line of fire as best they could (though usually not with complete success because their team could get so bored and so creative). Koenig pretended not to pay attention, but it was abundantly clear that he toggled between annoyance and amusement at the rivaling pranking antics.
6.
Once they arrived at the brand new SPA facilities and, given who was behind the funding and building of said facilities, it was no surprise when Tony Stark made his presence known.
The two warring factions teamed up for the most epic of all pranks on the genius-billionaire-playboy-philanthropist. After all, they couldn't let their host go without knowing that his efforts were much appreciated. Their reputations were very much on the line and all four agreed that they could not, with any good conscious or honor, let the opportunity go by unremarked or any of that nonsense.
No one realized it, but the appearance of an Iron Man suit duded up with the Union Jack with absolutely no video surveillance to indicate the culprits and the paint cans in question in the possession of Tony Stark's own robots went in the record books as one of the best pranks on Tony Stark. Ever.
Little did they know, Tony Stark enjoyed a good prank. After all, the man had graduated from MIT and that veritable institution was known for its clever hacks.
7.
All photographic and video evidence of the Capture-the-Flag game between the team's drones and Tony Stark's robots have been preserved for posterity's sake.
If nothing else, it was good to know that Tony was just as competitive as the team was. Maybe it wasn't a full-on prank, but it was fun as hell to go at it with the Science Bros (though Jane was trying to get them to change the name to the Science Alliance since she was, in fact, not a man).
8.
One of the great team-up pranks actually revolved around Coulson's birthday.
Phil Coulson would have been perfectly happy to have his birthday go unremarked, given the relatively dire standing that SHIELD had at the moment. His team (along with multiple members of the Avengers) thought otherwise.
No one told the man, but it was generally agreed that they were going to prank the hell out of Phil Coulson on his birthday. They didn't even try to be subtle or go grand. They were just going to do the fun, if juvenile, pranks that would keep him on his toes throughout the day.
And, if they had a massive surprise party at the end of the day, Coulson would not disapprove.
9.
In light of the escalation of pranks that had happened upon arrival at the SPA, Jemma Simmons was not expecting to get a whip cream pie in the face, when she walked into the bathroom.
It wasn't the UK flag this time. It was the USA flag.
Her sputtering turned to full-fledge laughing when she turned around and saw her husband bent over double, laughing his butt off at her shocked face. She might have gotten angry but that would have defeated the purpose of revenge. Instead, she grabbed Antoine Tripplett, pulled him in for a kiss, and made a very deliberate point of getting the whip cream all over him.
Maybe they missed dinner and the team movie night, but no one was going to comment on that, when the two were not very subtle about disposing of the remnants of the prank the next morning. Besides, whip cream was a very fun thing to clean up, when one's spouse is involved and the thing that you are cleaning up is edible.
Jemma filed whip cream away in her mental file of Antoine and Jemma's Special Things for future reference. Antoine was doing the same.
Anyway, I hope that you all enjoyed this. Please review and let me know what you thought about this new chapter!