03 - [Park Chanyeol]

After she was gone, I no longer knew the meaning of smiles.

"Hello everyone, I'm the happy virus Chanyeol." I pretended to look happy as smiled at the camera.

After that, a clear and soft voice came from beside.

"Hello, I'm..…I'm in charge of eyeliner in the group, Baekhyun."He waved to the camera, slender fingers swaying before my eyes.

How annoying.

"Actually, many of the viewers are very curious about this," The host looked at us, interested, "there are some rumours saying that Baekhyun and Chanyeol don't get along with each other. Is this true?"

Just when I felt that guy was about so say something, the host cut in.

"Is it because of women?"

"Not at all." I immediately denied, "I don't even know where these rumours came from, there must have been some misunderstanding. All of the members are really close with each other, and, none of us have had a girlfriend since debut."

I felt Baekhyun tilt his head to take a glance at me.

Denying it did make me feel a little uneasy. After all, the interviewer this time was rather famous in the entertainment industry. Things between me and Baekhyun aren't exactly unknown, and it was unlikely for him to be unaware of it.

But it can't be helped. As celebrities, every second was acting.

The interviewer gave us a long and meaningful smile, "So its just like how everyone sees it to be? All the members are very close?"

"Yes." This time, it was Luhan who replied.

"Then are there members who behave very differently off-camera?"

Before I could respond to the question, I heard Sehun spoke.

"Chanyeol hyung, he…"

Luhan turned around to look at Sehun and stepped hard onto Sehun's feet where the camera could not capture.

"Ah, no…actually, its Baekhyun hyung, he…"

Luhan was about to roll his eyes.

"Of course the one with the biggest difference off camera would be Sehun," Kyungsoo who was silent the whole time replied, "Sehun always seem meek and obedient infront of the camera, but when he is with us, he messes around a lot."

The interviewer carried on with the other topics, but I did not feel like listening anymore.

- - Byun Baek hyun, looks like both of us are pretty good at acting.

"Sehun-ah, please think before you speak will you? You shouldn't be finding more topics for the host to talk about!" When the show ended, Tae Shin Hyung reprimanded Sehun while jabbing a finger at his forehead.

"But…It wasn't even anything sensitive…"Sehun complained.

"Who said it wasn't? Why don't you go read the papers!"

"It's alright, Tae Shin Hyung. It wasn't that bad." I tried to cut in.

"Yeah, yeah. Schedule is over now, let's go eat." Sehun said.

"Hm, I heard there's this restaurant that's pretty good, why don't we go try the place out?" Luhan immediately followed with the flow of the conversation, "Come with us too, Baekhyun?"

It was only then when I noticed Byun Baekhyun who was standing the furthest away.

He who originally had his head down looked up at the sudden question directed at him.

- - The face that I dislike looking at the most.

"N…Nevermind."

"Come with us."

"It's alright… my stomach doesn't feel well…all of a sudden, I think I'm going back to rest first…"

If you looked closely, his face did seem a little pale.

Even so, he looked ridiculous to me.

"You are saying this, so someone would care for you right?"

"You don't suit trying to act pitiful, Byun Baekhyun."

"Chanyeol…"

Luhan was pulling at me.

"That's because no one will be fooled by your acts anymore."

"Park Chanyeol." Luhan stopped me in a stern voice, "Enough."

Byun Baekhyun only lowered his head, and remained silent.

I remained silent as well, because I did not want to ruin everyone's mood. I stared at him coldly with my arms folded, seeing if he could try to come up with whatever new tricks.

Luhan asked him in a soft voice, "Do you feel unwell? I should accompany you back first."

"No, its fine, I can walk back by myself." He kept his head looking downwards.

Pretending to be exhausted and worn out, trying to earn more pity huh? Maybe you should cut down a little on that, but even if you did so no one will be on your side.

If you did something wrong, you should just stand there quietly. No - you should just disappear. Don't ever dream of being forgiven, even if the others can, I won't ever.

"It was right that you decided not to come with us. Seeing you ruins my mood"

How did we become like this, our group.

Or maybe I should say, Byun Baekhyun and I, how did we become like this?

…Nevermind, I don't want to think about it. Whenever I thought of his name, my fists clench automatically.

It was all because of him…

Suddenly, I recalled when I was asked about my ideal type on the interview just now.

"My ideal type…it'd be good if she had long black hair, eyes raised at the ends, even better if she has a pretty eyesmile. Someone who is petite and delicate."

She is very pretty. Very pretty when she smiles, very pretty when she's angry, even her lashes and fingers are pretty.

…Hayeon ah, did you hear that?

I'm always thinking of you. Do you know? I'm yearning for you.

When you are watching the television, surfing the internet, listening to music, will you be reminded of us? Then think of me as a total jerk.

I wanted you to be by my side like crazy…thought of you like crazy.

If I could see you again, I will go to all lengths to make you stay, and never let go of your hands.

My Hayeon ah…I really, miss you.

When we returned to the dorm, it was already evening. I pushed open the bedroom door, and saw Byun Baekhyun – he was curled up on the bed. He only looked up to take a glance at me when I entered, and then closed his eyes again.

"They aren't here now," I looked at him icily, "you don't need to bother act pitiful."

"…yea"

"Always acting like this, what for? To make everyone think that I always bully you?"

"I told you, don't even dream about it. No one will stand on your side."

He continued to keep his eyes closed, silent. It made me even more infuriated. I immediately dashed forward to tug his blanket off and pulled him up from his position.

"Don't fucking pretend to be dead."

He opened his eyes to look at me, face full of weariness.

"I feel really unwell…I don't want to speak."

"You dare talk to me like that. Are you crazy, Byun Baekhyun."

I tightened my grip on him as I said menacingly. He's brows knitted a little, and his lips were almost colourless, looks like he's really sick.

So what. He's not good enough for my pity.

"Chanyeol, let go of me." He's voice was weak.

I let out a dry laugh.

"What if I said no."

"…Park Chanyeol."

"What."

He used all his strength to look up at me, dry and pale lips shivering in the process.

"Just, let me off for once…just today. Just today."

I smirked and pulled him out of the bed to pin him against the wall, then I leaned in to kiss him hardly.

I wanted to gnaw on him, to tear him apart, and I wanted to see him in unbearable pain.

His expression did twist up in pain, one hand continued to press down on his stomach, while the other, weakly grabbing onto me to prevent himself from falling.

I must be crazy.

- - This person before me.

- - I wanted to destroy him like crazy.