"Sirius, what's this on the floor?" Asked Remus raising an eyebrow and pointing down to the sloppy golden mess by Sirius' trunk in the dormitory.
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Retorted Remus.
"Sirius." Warned Remus darkly.
"Okay! Okay! It's liquid luck, you know, felix felicis, that stuff."
"Why is it on the floor?"
"Well, we were learning about it in Potions last week-"
"I know that."
"Yes, yes, and I thought to myself 'if James had a little bit of that he could get Evans!' Brilliant, no?" Explained Sirius, looking like a four year old child that had been caught stealing biscuits from the pantry.
"No. Why is it on the floor?" Asked Remus impatiently.
"I tripped over that stupid thing."
"What stupid thing?"
"That ruddy cat!" Exclaimed Sirius, pointing to a black and very sickly looking cat that had taken a liking to sleeping on the floor of the dorm and by the window sill. The said cat had several bald patches that had mysteriously laced over its body."But now, if you think about it, we can't make him take it orally, because he might get Floormonella-"
"He might get what?" Interrupted Remus.
"Floormonella. You know, when you get sick, from licking or eating dirty salmon, you get salmonella, if you lick the floor, you get Floormonella. There's a Muggle story about it!" Expressed Sirius, his eyes wide, like a child explaining something that he knew wasn't right, but it was all he knew, so he continued to try and enforce his view upon his partner.
"Cinderella?" Guessed Remus.
"That's it!" Sirius pointed at Remus like a game show host.
"And I think that salmonella is just a general term for when you eat raw meat or… oh never mind." Sighed Remus, seeing that it was a lost cause. He had already tried and failed to explain taxis and irony to Sirius. "Go on."
"Well, if we gathered it all up and then we could put it on James's bed, and he might get lucky in other… departments." Sirius giggled like a twelve year old.
And of course, Remus couldn't help laughing just a tad whenever Sirius laughed/