"I've made new year's resolutions." Announced Sirius loudly, flapping a very large piece of parchment around the Common Room, he was strutting.
"What are they?" Asked Peter enthusiastically .
Sirius went red and ducked his head at that point. Grinning, James dove to steal the parchment from Sirius' grasp. His eyes wide in terror, Sirius did the only sure way so that James wouldn't get it. He put the piece of paper down his pants.
Sirius didn't expect James to call on Remus to retrieve the list. After all, Remus was already in Sirius' pants several times a week.
Everyone could see the shock on Remus' face as he got further and further down the list.
"Sirius!" Yelled Remus. "This is just a list of places you want to have sex."
"Same thing." Shrugged Sirius. "Join me?"
