Chapter 31
About 4AM, Koh was wakened from a sound sleep by the outer door buzzer. It was Korn.
"Sorry to disturb you at this hour, Koh. I cannot come during the day - too much watched. And even at night, I can only do this once. How is he?"
"Physically, he'll recover. I'd like to keep him for a day or two; give that back time to really heal. Emotionally, I don't know. We didn't talk much. I wanted him to sleep. I've got him sedated, but I can wake him with a stimulant if I need to."
"No, don't do that. Kirk is the one I really need to talk to anyway. You don't have him sedated too, do you?"
"Heavens no! Kirk doesn't lose sleep worrying about things."
He turned on the monitor which showed Kirk asleep on the floor of Room E.
"How would you like me to wake him? I can blast him with pain, turn on the mic and talk to him, or go down the hall and unlock the door. But you won't get his natural response, until he's sure there's no audience."
"Let's go down the hall."
Kirk woke the instant he heard the key in the lock, but he did not move. Mentally prepared for anything, he waited to see who would enter.
Korn preceded Koh into the room. As the light came up, he saw Kirk in the corner exactly where he had left him hours before. The only change was the addition of handcuffs. Kirk must have been truly exhausted to have slept in that position for hours without moving.
"Kirk, get up. I need to talk to you."
Kirk rose and stood quietly with lowered eyes, this time, well within reach of Korn's hand.
"Konti told me that you shed the slave character like taking off a coat, whenever he wants to talk. Will you do that for me, too?"
"Yes, in private." Kirk raised clear eyes to Korn's face.
"Why did you do it?" was Korn's urgent question.
"Koh told me that Konti would be charged with treason if I didn't."
"And you believed him."
"Yes."
"Why?"
"I have been working with Koh for weeks. We play lots of games and he loves to tease, but I know how he thinks, and I know truth when I hear it."
"Then he wasn't just trying to torture you?"
"Oh, he was doing that too. Quite successfully, I might add."
"You don't mind?"
"No. Since I was going to do the deed anyway, I saw no reason not to satisfy Koh as well. Unfortunately, I forgot the effect my words would have on Konti. Very nearly a fatal mistake."
"You said once that you could make Konti hate you. Is that what you have done?"
"You think Konti hates me?"
"Doesn't he?"
Kirk turned to Koh, a delighted smile on his face.
"If Konti can fool his father, do you think it's safe to assume he fooled the others as well?"
"Yes. It was really quite good. Whose idea was it to throw you around?" Koh inquired.
"Mine. A spur-of-the-moment thing, because you hadn't gotten back with the handcuffs. We couldn't just be standing here."
"Are you telling me he faked it? It was all an act? I had heard you were a superb actor, but Konti has never done anything like that before." Korn shook his head, not quite believing it yet.
"On the contrary, he does it most afternoons. It began as a game, but has become deadly serious. He knows it's imperative that no one guess what he really thinks of me. He's been doing it for my sake, because I asked him to. Today, he realized the stakes were higher. I don't think he would have done it to save his own life. But for yours and Koh's lives, he would sacrifice his honor."
"His honor?"
"Yes. Konti's problem is that he cannot view me as a slave who deserves no honor. On top of that, he genuinely likes me. It hurts him deeply to treat me with dishonor. But he will do what must be done. Interestingly, he continues to be amazed that I harbor no anger towards him, but it has not occurred to him to be angry with me for what I did to him today."
"And what of Koh?"
"Koh shouldn't be in any danger, as long as we keep up the nightly torture sessions. Unless we have an audience, though we could handle that if we knew they were here."
"How so?"
"The atmosphere in here would have to change from one of cooperation and humor, to adversarial grim suffering. We could do it, but it wouldn't be nearly as much fun. And most of his experiments would have to be shelved until the audience left."
"Why is that?"
"Because they depend on honest verbal input from me, which wouldn't fit the picture we want the audience to see."
"Hm. And what of anger?"
"I'm sure I could dredge up some fake anger to make it look realistic. Sullen fatalism would probably fit better though."
"Tell me about your real emotions. From Koh's reports, you never get angry. He constantly pushes you and stretches your limits. You never push back. Not only that, you actually help him do it to you. Even today, you were angry for Konti, but not for yourself. Why?"
Kirk chuckled. "Konti's been trying to figure that out for three months. Koh just takes it as a given, and goes on from there. I can't explain it. Just say I'm crazy."
"That is unsatisfactory. Try again."
"I knew before, that I was not particularly afraid of pain. Koh has enlarged my experience of the word, taken me places I didn't know existed. Having been there once, I do not fear a return journey. Anything that reduces the number of things I'm afraid of makes me stronger. Anything that makes me stronger is something I value, regardless of the level of present unpleasantness."
It wasn't the whole truth, but Kirk hoped it made enough sense to satisfy.
"Hm. I see. One last thing: Koh told you about Act II of our little play?"
"The public beatings? Yes. Any specific instructions, or just make it look as awful as possible?"
"Koh, I told you to tell them everything." Korn turned an accusing gaze on Koh.
"Kirk doesn't care. Konti is the one who needed the details, and I did tell him." He turned to Kirk. "What we're talking about is three 500-lash beatings spaced only far enough apart that he doesn't kill you in the process."
"How many did we do today?"
"450."
"And how close together do you think we can manage?"
"I don't know. Depends on your vitals."
"Guess. Are we talking hours, days, or what?"
"Definitely not hours; probably less than a week."
"For effect, three days in a row would be best. You don't want it to look like three separate beatings. You want the effects to be cumulative."
"That's what could kill you," Koh declared.
"I know I can handle one such beating, probably two. Can't you pump me full of something that would make me survive the third?"
"Maybe, but I can't stop the beating part way through if I guessed wrong."
"Konti could stop if I passed out, claiming he wanted me to feel every lash. Then we could pick it up the next day, and keep going for as many days as it took to get to 1500. Should make for an interesting week. How long will it take Konti to recover?"
"Two or three days. And that's with synthskin, anesthetics, IV's, and sedatives. And I can't give you any synthskin."
"And I don't want sedatives. Aside from shock, the biggest problem is likely to be loss of blood. Infection shouldn't be a problem until later. Well, I think it's doable, but I'll bow to your medical judgment."
Koh turned to Korn. "See- what did I tell you? Konti responds with, 'I can't do that!' Kirk responds with an analysis of the situation, the possible problems, and a conclusion that there's no particular reason why he can't do the impossible. And not one minute of that analysis is spent counting the cost to himself."
"Konti may say he can't do it, but he can, and he will. I'll talk to him," Kirk promised.
"He will too," Koh told Korn. "Can you imagine persuading someone to give you a 1500-lash beating? And he'll make it sound eminently reasonable."
"Well, it is! There's a perfectly reasonable reason for doing this. It will save three lives. Besides, I'm the cause of all this trouble to begin with. Makes perfect sense that I should pay."
"Do you really believe that?" Koh challenged.
"Doesn't matter, as long as Konti believes it, which he probably won't, but I can try anyway. Do you have any thoughts on a location for this show?"
"The steps outside the State Assembly," Korn revealed.
"That's good; so when I pass out, I can fall down the steps. Very nice touch. That idea has Koh's fingerprint on it."
"You know me too well." Koh smiled.
"Do I understand correctly from all of this that you will continue to cooperate fully?" Korn wanted to know.
"Of course. Did you doubt it?"
"What is the likelihood of your ability to act in the midst of all that agony?"
"As long as I'm conscious. Don't worry, I won't stand there in stoic silence. That would not be in character at all. Besides, it'd be very boring to watch."
Korn left and Kirk went back to sleep. The next day, Koh fed him the steak dinner, as well as glass after glass of water and juice. Kirk worked out several times on his own initiative. Koh agreed to test the wires Kirk was wearing, and several needed replacing, due to the rough-housing of the day before. He even tried working on a couple of experiments, but he was clearly preoccupied and not focusing on his work. In the late afternoon, Kirk asked about it. They were sitting at the table in Room C with yet another glass of juice.
"Koh, what's bugging you? You're troubled about something. Is Konti not doing well? Has Korn sent you more bad news? Are you worried about visitors? Do you want me wearing the handcuffs? Give. What's the problem?"
"I've got the outer door locked. No one can take us by surprise. Korn hasn't sent any news, good or bad. And Konti's progressing well. I'm going to let him out of the sedative for a few hours this evening. I'm hoping he'll sleep naturally tonight. I'll let him get up tomorrow. He'll be stiff and sore, but well on his way to recovery."
"Koh, I'm not expecting medical treatment at all, but if you do anything, don't give me sedatives. I want to be up and moving as soon as I'm conscious. I want to be mentally alert. And I don't need pain-killers, or drugs to make me sleep. But you still haven't told me what's bothering you."
"1500 lashes is what's bothering me. Why isn't it bothering you? What's the most you've ever had before?"
"I wasn't counting them, but so what? What about it bothers you?"
"The enormity of it, I guess. It's one thing to say, three times as many as you gave Konti; it's quite another to add up the total. I guess I didn't think you'd go as far as you did."
"Koh, it isn't like you to be appalled, or even regretful. Why is this different from what we've been doing for weeks?" Kirk needed to understand.
"It's the physical, visible damage - very different from those wires you're wearing."
"But you weren't bothered by what Khlat did on board ship those first three days."
"How would you know? You could neither see nor hear me."
"I would have sensed it. I remember your gentle but efficient hands."
"At that point, you were no more than a prisoner to me. A pretty important one, mind you, and I was under a lot of pressure to make you talk. I knew very little about you: only that you held Khlat's tactics in contempt, and it took a lot to exhaust you; neither of which came as a surprise. But now, thanks to your transparency, I know you intimately. I know how you think; I know what you feel. It seems as if I know you as well as I know Konti, maybe better. And Konti is my closest friend. I will not admit this to Korn, but I think of you as a friend."
"I'm glad. That means a lot to me. I want to be a friend to you. Okay, I believe it bothers you. But we have another day or two before it's a present reality. I need you to pretend it doesn't bother you, for Konti's sake. This is going to be very difficult for him. And doubly so, if we act like we're afraid of it. Can you make it just one more game we're playing?" Kirk grinned hopefully.
"Is that what you think, that it's just a game?"
"No, it's much more serious. Lives are at stake. For me, it's closer to a performance than a game. But if you treat it as a game like all the rest - in other words, act normally - then it becomes more acceptable to do, in Konti's mind."
"All right. I'll try," Koh sighed.
"Good. Go write us a new program for Room F. That'll keep your mind occupied this evening, and give us something interesting to do tomorrow. Maybe even a rerun of that latest enhancement drug. Find something to occupy Konti's mind. The last thing we want is to sit around being bored and anxious while we wait."
xxxx
A couple of hours later, Kirk went to visit Konti. He was conscious, but groggy.
"How are you feeling?"
"Like a limp dish rag. What did Koh pump me full of?"
"The sedatives will start wearing off. Things should get better from here on. How does your back feel?"
"What back? I can hardly tell I have arms and legs. I can't feel the back at all."
"Feeling will start coming back soon. When it does, it's likely to get pretty bad for awhile. You may decide you'd rather be knocked out again."
"You wouldn't," Konti stubbornly declared.
"The things I choose aren't always entirely sane. But you're right: I would rather be functional ASAP, and the presence or absence of pain is a minor matter in comparison."
Konti chuckled. "Yes. I remember that first night after the mindsifter. You were determined to be mobile, cracked ribs not withstanding. So if you were me, how would you get functional?"
Kirk laughed. "I'll tell you, but if you try it, Koh will probably have a fit."
"Let him. It's my body."
"All right then. First, I would acknowledge the pain price to be paid. I don't know how bad it will be; I only know it will be worse than if I take the easy route. Secondly, I determine that I will push myself as long and as hard as it takes to accomplish my goal. A healthy stubborn streak is a useful asset at this point. Third, I divide the goal into small, specific steps. Then I conquer each step one at a time, and I refuse to give up until I am fully functional."
"Sounds good to me. What small step would you start with?"
"Standing up is probably a major step. I would break it down into smaller pieces."
They worked together at it for four hours, after which Konti could not only stand and walk, but do push ups and jumping jacks. Kirk called a halt when Konti admitted to being tired enough to sleep through most anything. Kirk lay on the floor, having told Konti to wake him if he needed to. As he drifted off to sleep, Kirk reflected that they had not broached the subject of the upcoming beating. Oh well, that could wait until tomorrow.
Koh turned out the light in the monitoring room. He had known what Kirk would do if left alone with Konti, and he had not been disappointed. But he had also taken Kirk's advice, and had several activities planned for the next day. As for the day after tomorrow, he still dreaded it, but would try to hide the fact from Konti.
xxxx
Kirk was already in the weight room when Koh went in to examine Konti the next morning. Pronouncing the back healing nicely, he removed the IV, and prescribed light activity for the day. When they convened for breakfast, Kirk had a tall glass of water and another of juice. Konti remarked on it, but Kirk just grinned and told him Koh was worried about dehydration. Koh didn't deny it.
They spent the morning in Room F and the afternoon in Room D, with weight workouts spaced in between. Though it occupied the time, Kirk could tell that Koh's heart wasn't in it. The sooner this beating business was over, the sooner Koh would return to normal. Kirk tried several times to crack jokes, but both Konti and Koh just looked at him. Finally, after supper, which for Kirk was again juice and water, the three of them sat down to talk in Room A, so Kirk could plug in the IV's. Kirk took charge of the conversation, since neither of the others seemed disposed to do so.
"Koh, can you give us a run-down on what's supposed to happen tomorrow?"
"At noon, the two of you leave here in Konti's flitter, and go directly to the State Assembly. You arrive during the mid-day break. There should be quite a crowd. Konti gives you a 500-lash beating on the outside steps of the building. Should take about four hours. Then you both go home to Konti's house, and try to recover enough to do it again the next day. You will not come back here tomorrow night."
"Why not?"
"It's my professional opinion that you'll be in no shape to make that walk, and if, by sheer force of will, you are, it would be out of character for you to display that willpower. No, I will make a house call tomorrow evening. I don't expect you back here until next week." Deprived of his monitors, Koh wasn't sure what to do with his hands. He finally tucked them under his arms, giving his body language a stubborn defiance that didn't quite fit his words.
"Okay. We need a script for the scene on the steps. I assume you're talking about the landing half way up. I agree it would be very dramatic to have me pass out and fall down the stairs. I'm just not sure it fits my character to stand there completely unrestrained while Konti beats me senseless. Is there something we could tie my hands to?"
"Not really. We'd have to change the location entirely."
"I'd rather not do that. It's a good location otherwise. We'll just have to get creative and work with what we've got."
They discussed several ways in which Kirk might display fear and agony. After about fifteen minutes, Kirk was satisfied that it was doable. He turned to the script for Konti. He himself would likely not have to say anything. They discussed what Konti would say, and how, for about thirty minutes. Finally Kirk turned to Konti, who had not said a word during the entire conversation thus far.
"Talk to me. What are you thinking? Can you do this?"
"I will certainly be physically well enough to deliver 500 lashes. I could have done it today. Was glad I didn't have to. The script you're working on: probably. It's not really all that different from what we've already done. Obviously, I don't want to do this. Just as obviously, I have to, so I will."
"Good. Two words of advice. Don't think about the task as a whole. Break it down into smaller pieces. You don't have to survive 1500 lashes, or even 500. Just focus on the present moment, this lash, or maybe these five or ten.
"The other thing you need to remember is that I could do this in perfect peace, standing there in motionless acceptance. What you will see instead, if I can pull this off, is a gradual disintegration of the will to endure. You need to refuse to let what you see get into your heart. Cling to what you know to be true. Regardless of what it looks like, that perfect peace is sustaining me. I'm not concerned about surviving it, nor enduring the agony. I'm only concerned about giving a believable performance. That's what will save the lives at stake."