Chapter 34

The third beating went off exactly as Kezak had planned it. Even the dive was almost perfect. The second somersault had been a little ragged, but probably better that way - more realistic. Holding absolutely still for the last 50 lashes, feigning unconsciousness, had been easy. The only difficult part had been early on, when he'd first bent over. It was all he could do to avoid laughing, because it had been the position his mother had used to spank him. He'd managed to turn the laugh into a shudder, and hoped Konti hadn't noticed. As soon as they were in the flitter with the door closed, Konti started talking.

"Kirk, are you all right?"

"You asked me that yesterday. I'm fine, at least emotionally. Well, you finally got what you wanted - a total lack of reaction to the lash."

"That's not what I meant, and you know it. By the way, what was so funny along about lash 112?"

"Sorry. I was hoping you hadn't noticed. Do you think anybody else knew I was laughing?"

"No, because it would never occur to them that you might be. Kezak probably knows, and Koh wasn't there."

So Kirk told him what was funny. As expected, Konti didn't think it was funny, but at least he had stopped being incredulous that Kirk could find such things funny. After a few more minutes debriefing the show, Konti changed the subject.

"I have a question. Why haven't you said anything about Jesus since last night?"

"Because we haven't been alone. The decision to share your commitment to Jesus Christ must be yours. The risks are considerable. Also you may feel that I forced your decision, because you made it believing that I was dying."

"You may die tonight instead. By the way, have you taken those injections?"

"No. The reaction hasn't set in yet. I told you I'm fine. No shock symptoms."

"Maybe you're so mentally confused, you don't know you're in shock."

"Do I sound confused?"

"No, but then what do I know? You can fake almost anything," Konti replied jokingly.

"But why would I?"

"No reason; maybe I'm the one that's confused. Anyway we're almost there. Uh-oh! Trouble. We've got company. Looks like a government-issue flitter. Might be Korn, but he wouldn't come here, unless he's got the inspectors breathing down his neck. If you're going to take those injections, you better do it now."

"I'm not taking them. I have more control without them. I'm unconscious, remember? And I'm staying that way til you give the all clear. Unless you have to wake me before they leave, in which case, douse me with a bucket of cold water. Now, off you go, and maybe it isn't who we think."

But it was. Konti was back in less than five minutes, hauling Kirk out of the flitter, muttering over the bloody mess on the floor. Throwing Kirk to the ground, he cleaned the flitter, explaining that it would stink if he didn't. Then he shouldered Kirk and carried him into the back room. Dumping him on the floor, he turned him onto his face with a foot, again muttering about the stinking mess. He excused himself to clean the blood off himself, but Kirk was sure the others were still watching him.

Konti was back in a few minutes and the inspectors began quizzing him, trying to crack his act, to make him break character. But Korn was strangely silent. Kirk prayed for Konti. Finally in desperation to be believed, Konti brought up the last 50 lashes, and his disgust that Kirk had been unconscious.

They will make you pay for that, thought Kirk, and prepared himself mentally. Sure enough, within minutes, they had Konti backed into a corner, having to pretend to relish the idea of waking Kirk and delivering another 50 lashes.

They know, Konti screamed at himself, as he was fetching the water. Doesn't matter what they know, Kirk would say. It's what they can prove. Don't break character! Okay, but I'm sorry. Don't be, Kirk would say. Even if this encore kills me, it's okay. Jesus loves you.

When the cold water hit his head, Kirk sputtered, gasped, shook his head, groaned, and began to shake all over. Suddenly icy cold, he shivered uncontrollably. The shock was setting in. Well, he would use it for effect, and maybe Konti would think it was faked. There was another wait of several minutes, while Konti fetched the whip from the flitter. Kirk tried unsuccessfully to move himself out of the puddle of cold water. He undoubtedly could have done so, but better for them to think he could not.

Konti returned and started in with the lash. After ten methodically delivered strokes, he could feel Kirk saying, this is boring. Do something different. Kezak would say, it's not going anywhere. There's no momentum. So Konti began to vary the rhythm and location. Kirk's reactions and general body tension made it seem apparent that Konti was driving him crazy.

Kirk expertly built the tension til the whole room was charged with it. Suddenly on lash 42, he let loose a sustained, ear-splitting scream, and flailed about uncontrollably with arms and legs. Konti delivered the last eight lashes as fast as he could, and Kirk summoned reserves to increase his reaction. Throwing the whip in the corner, Konti waited until the scream subsided into a sob.

"Well, Kirk, you won't forget that for awhile!"

Neither will I, thought Konti, as he strode into the main room. He poured himself a drink and sat down, willing his hands to stop shaking. This isn't over yet, he told himself firmly. The others straggled out, poured themselves drinks, and stood around for ten minutes of small talk before Konti could suggest they leave. Kirk's sobs grew quieter, but Konti knew he was still in character. Which was just as well, because the inspectors each stepped in for another look before they departed. Korn gave him a look of mixed admiration, sympathy, and regret, but said nothing. Konti locked the door and hurried to Kirk.

"They've gone, and I locked the door. I brought the hypos from the flitter."

"You do it. My hands are too shaky. Maximum dose on both of them. Thanks. Can you get some towels?"

By the time Konti returned with towels, Kirk had managed to inch himself out of the worst of the puddle of water.

"Leave the puddle. Just dry me off. If they come back, I'll have to get back in it."

"No!"

"Yes. Now don't argue, just do what I say. And Konti, if I'm unconscious when the door buzzer rings, get rid of all the evidence and put me back in the puddle before you answer the door."

Konti did his best to dry Kirk, but without drying the floor too, it wasn't very successful. Kirk let him wrap his feet in a dry towel, but for the rest, Kirk lay on the cold, damp floor and shivered. And tried to think about something else.

"Too bad Kezak wasn't here for the encore. You were great!"

"You, my friend, were the star of the show. Where'd you learn to scream like that? I wouldn't have thought you had enough energy left to pull off that kind of a finale."

"I didn't know that I did. But that's what seemed to fit the situation. With this size room, we needed something with more finesse than a lot of what we did out there. But Konti, what you did for me made it a lot easier. So thanks very much."

"You're welcome. I could feel you telling me how boring it was going to be if I didn't do something interesting."

Kirk chuckled. "You know me well. Konti, I like working with you. If Kezak has his way, we could be quite a team. If I survive the night, that is."

"Do you think you will?"

"Doesn't look real good at the moment, but after last night, I'm not making any assumptions. However, the will to live is still going strong, for whatever that's worth."

"Kirk, there's one thing about this that's bothering me. I got the distinct impression those inspectors knew we were faking. But if so, then somebody talked. Do you think it was Kezak?" he asked grimly.

"I doubt it, just because there wasn't much time. He was in the crowd when we got there. But I agree, they acted as if somebody tipped them off, but they needed proof. Thank you for not giving it to them. And who knows, maybe it was Kadat."

At this moment, the door buzzer sounded.

"Quick! Put the towels in a drawer; get rid of those hypo cartridges; and turn out the light!"

Konti heard Kirk gasp as he lowered himself onto the cold water. He hesitated and turned back to Kirk.

"Get going! I'll be in character by the time you get back."

So Konti went. And was back a few minutes later.

"Kirk, it's Kezak."

Kirk again struggled to get free of the water, and could not.

"Sorry, guys. I'm not faking. This time I really can't."

So they lifted him free of the puddle and dried him off, more successfully this time. Konti explained while they worked. But Kirk continued to shake convulsively even after he was dry.

"Too bad we don't have any more hypos. That cold water is getting to me. Starting to feel feverish too. If Koh doesn't get here soon, I may be history."

"What can we do?"

"Not much. Need medicines we haven't got. And that heat blanket, which we don't have either. But you can keep talking. At least until I start getting delirious."

"Kezak, you talk to him. I'm going to get some bedding."

Konti pulled the fur and blankets off his own bed and brought them to the back room. They laid him on the fur, placed clean towels over the wounds, and piled blankets on top. Kirk was aware enough to realize Konti had given up his own bedding, but hadn't the energy for more than a mild protest.

They talked for three hours with no sign of Koh. At first Kirk was an active participant in the conversation. Then he would contribute a word or short phrase, which showed he was still following mentally. Then his input became erratic, disjointed, and unrelated to the conversation. Shortly thereafter, it degenerated into obviously delirious muttering, some of it even in Standard. This startled Konti, because he had forgotten that Klingon was not Kirk's native tongue.

Shortly before 2200, the door buzzer sounded. Konti went to answer it; Kezak stayed with Kirk. They had agreed without telling him, not to put him back in the water.

"Who is it?"

"Koh. Let me in, Konti."

"Are you alone?"

"Yes."

"I am wearing a special mark. What is it, where is it, and who put it there?"

"It's a cross on your belly, and Kirk put it there."

Konti let him in.

"Sorry, but we're having to be extra careful."

"Is he alive?"

"Yes, so far. Come on back. Kezak is with him."

"Kezak! Somebody talked, and it had to be him. You got any rope around here?"

"Yes, but- Kirk doesn't think it was him."

"I know it wasn't me, you, or Kirk. That leaves Kezak. Get the rope."

Koh strode into the back room, followed by Konti, who removed a length of rope from a drawer. While Koh checked Kirk's vitals, Konti jumped Kezak from behind, disarmed him, and tied him hand and foot. Beyond an initial yelp of surprise, Kezak neither resisted nor protested. Koh turned to face him.

"Somebody talked. You better hope he survives the night, because if he doesn't, you won't either."

"What are his chances?"

"As long as he's breathing, there's a chance. Konti, tell me in sequence everything that happened to him."

Konti's concise summary left out nothing. Koh was giving injections and inserting IV's as he listened. Then he and Konti maneuvered Kirk into the heat blanket. Kirk seemed unaware of any of it.

"Kirk, can you hear me?"

"Koh, it won't work; I'm not afraid of any of it."

"I know you're not, but please describe your symptoms anyway."

"Symptoms? Haven't got any. I feel fine."

"No pain?"

"Oh, that. Rather not think about it, but if you insist. The intensity seems more or less normal, but there's something different about it. Have you changed the program?"

"Yes, but don't worry about it. Just let me know if the intensity gets a lot worse. I'll be back in a few hours."

Giving orders to Kezak to keep Kirk talking, Koh insisted Konti eat something. Over a quick meal, he told Konti that the inspectors had grilled him for almost four hours, trying to get him to admit the existence of a conspiracy.

"They'll never believe that Kirk has no military agenda. Furthermore, they don't believe that I haven't managed to uncover some sign of it."

"Do you think he does? That he's making fools of us?"

"I've asked myself that question almost every day since he got here. If he does, he has it well-hidden. The only thing that makes any kind of sense is a long-term plan. But he doesn't expect to live that long, and he doesn't care. The man doesn't know what the word anxiety means."

They returned to the back room and sat against the wall, prepared to wait out the long night hours. Kezak was quietly telling a story. Konti listened only to Kirk, whose occasional interruptions showed he was still mostly delirious. Some of it was Klingon, much of it Standard. Some was muttering, some clearly understandable. Some was memorized Scripture, some one-liners were part of a longer thought.

"Sam, do you think Dad is ever afraid?"

"Thank you, Spock."

"Remember 280."

"I'm not afraid of the dark, Sam. Did you think I was?"

"Who are you, Spock? Why do I keep coming back to this unanswerable question?"

"Dying's not so difficult. It's just letting go."

"You can do this, Konti. I want you to."

"Don't be afraid for me, Mom. I have to go. The stars are calling me."

"You warned me, Spock, but it is bearable, just. And it shouldn't be too much longer now."

"Koh, I don't care how high or how long; I'm not pressing this button!"

Koh checked Kirk's vitals, replenished the IV, and gave him more injections.

"I wish I could turn off his pain by pressing a button. The next four hours are critical, and I can't give him anything more than I just did. I hope that stubborn will of his is working overtime, 'cause he's going to need it."

"Koh, that's what he said to me today in the flitter. 'I want you to.' How can he? And after that encore in here, he thanked me for driving him crazy. You should have heard the scream. And now, he's lying there dying. He's not afraid of it; he's not fighting it; and he doesn't blame anybody for it, least of all me, who has done it to him."

"Konti, he's not dead yet. Don't start grieving now."

But Konti was steeped in despair. He knew Kirk was dying; so did Koh; so did Kirk himself. Konti thought back to the conversation of the previous evening. Kirk's biggest concerns were that Konti not blame himself and that he accept the reality of Kirk's God.

How could he not blame himself? What had Kirk said about forgiveness? Of this he was absolutely certain: that Kirk did not hold this against him. But could he forgive himself, just because Kirk forgave him? And what about the reality of his God? Had his commitment last night been real, or just an act of desperation? The peace had certainly felt real, as real as what Kirk had given him last week. But he did not feel peaceful now.

Konti's soul searching continued for over two hours. Kezak had fallen silent. Koh paced the far end of the room, muttering variations on 'Don't die on me, Kirk.' Increasingly erratic breathing marked Kirk's deteriorating condition. Kirk hadn't said a word for hours, and was probably unconscious. Konti was so internally focused, he hardly noticed.

Suddenly Konti remembered something Kirk had said that first day here. That when he died, it would be God's decision, even if Konti thought he was doing it. Agitated, he stood up and started towards Kirk. Koh was at Kirk's side. He stood and faced Konti.

"I'm sorry, Konti. I truly am."

"No! Jesus, God of Kirk, hear me! He said You sent him to us, and that You would choose the time of his death. I believe him. You can take him now, or You can choose to give him back to us. I know we don't deserve to have him back. Our treatment of him has been terrible, and it will not get any better. But he does not hold it against us. I believe he would choose to come back, knowing the continued agony that awaits him. So I am asking You, because he is my friend, please give him back."

Koh stared at Konti in amazement. It sounded as if Konti really believed that Kirk's God could restore his life. His uncertainty was not over whether He could, but whether He would. The next moment Koh was startled to hear Kirk's audible intake of air. He whirled around, and turned the scanner on Kirk.

Minutes ago the machine had verified that Kirk was dead. Now it showed that Kirk was alive, very. Koh rechecked it three times, even looked at the wounds, which were still there. It was unaccountable. Kirk had definitely been dead. He had not imagined it, and the scanner's recorder confirmed it. Now he was not only alive, but no where near the brink of death. Koh sat shaking his head.

Konti breathed a quiet, "Thank you, Jesus!"

A few hours of sleep were had by all.

xxxx

Spock was playing chess with Young. Suddenly he became very still.

"Spock? What's wrong?"

"Jim," was Spock's whispered response. Looking like death warmed over, he rose. "If you will excuse me, Captain?"

"Certainly, Spock. We'll play another time."

Spock blindly made his way to his quarters. He had just felt Jim die. It had taken him completely by surprise, because nothing traumatic had preceded it. Some sense of emotional disturbance a few days earlier, but nothing really awful.

Yet by the time he reached his quarters, as suddenly as before, the emptiness disappeared. Jim was back. Very odd. As he sat on his bunk pondering it, his only conclusion was that someone had just raised Jim from the dead. He praised the Lord for several hours, and prayed for Jim Kirk.