The next morning, Welch and Taylor kept up a steady stream of texting. Considering the threat level against Grey, they both agreed Grey would not be going into the office that day. Unfortunately, Grey did not agree. He had slept very little and had another nightmare with Ana dying instead of Elena. He had tried playing the piano only to find himself caught in the same nightmare loop of gunfire, Ana's shocked expression and then her head exploding. The three men were arguing back and forth when Welch got a text from Sawyer. Security had been breached. Ana's condition was uncertain. Williams was down, Hayes was missing. Sawyer was injured and requesting immediate backup.

While Welch set the wheels in motion to increase security for Ana, Grey stopped arguing about going to work. He wanted to go to the hospital. He wanted to see Ana, but at the same time, he didn't want to see her. What if she didn't want him anymore? What if she just wanted Taylor? Why would anyone want a fucked up piece of shit like himself when they could have Taylor? What the fuck ever happened to Gail? Shit. Looks like he wasn't the only one who had a problem with Taylor's sleeping arrangements.

Taylor wanted to go to the hospital and see Ana. His nurse was adamant. He was going nowhere. He wasn't getting dressed. The oxygen and IV and foley catheter were not being removed and if he tried to get out of bed once more, he would find himself sedated for twenty four hours. The Moving Company had treated him in the past and were aware what a uncooperative patient he could be. His injuries were serious.

Taylor sighed; maybe now was a good time to talk with Grey, so he sent him a text and invited him to his bedroom.

He didn't come right away. The old Grey would have been there in seconds. So much of him was the same but so much of him was different. Taylor waited nervously but still no Grey. The nurse came and gave him his pain medication through the IV. Taylor tried to protest but knew she wouldn't budge. He swore under his breath as he felt the rush of the Fentanyl and his eyes rolled back. Almost instantly the constant throbbing pain in his shoulder ebbed. He let out a deep breath, unaware he had been holding his breath. So stupid, really, but than he had done some really stupid shit lately. How could he expect Grey to understand when he, himself, didn't understand. Half out of it, he heard the knock and Grey entering.

Taylor looked up and met Grey's eyes. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Shit. Fuck it. He was tired of carrying all this shit inside. Some things Grey had to know. It couldn't be put off.

Grey pushed a wing back upholstered chair closer to the bed and sat down. "How are you feeling, Jason?"

"I'll do. But 'Shezilla' has already medicated me so I need to start because I don't know how long I'll last."

Grey nodded his understanding.

The first month was hard, really hard on everyone. I couldn't believe we couldn't find the crash site. Between me and Ros, we called in every favor from everyone we ever knew, but it all came to a big nothing.

Ana was in a daze. She took a leave from her job at SIP and started doing half days with Ros, per your Instructions if you were incapacitated or incommunicado for more than forty eight hours. Weekends were spent searching for you. Sawyer stayed with her as close security and Welch and myself tried to figure out why the fuck we couldn't find you. Your mother had become very depressed and blamed Ana for the crash. Her reasoning was you were in such a hurry to be by her side, you became careless. Of course, Elena helped reinforce your mother's opinion of Ana whenever she could and that was pretty damn often.

The sharks were circling GEH and attacking whenever they could. The media discussed the end of GEH every fucking night, guessing who would eventually end up with it and if it would have any value. Your father was not pleased. He was never happy about you having Ana temporary Power of Attorney. Your parents became convinced she was a gold digger. They even began to suspect she had something to do with the crash. It was all so ridiculous. Everyone was hurting. Your father was beyond furious. He saw the family's inheritance being frittered away by a stranger. Where they may have been impressed with her initially, that all changed. Your father decided to have you declared dead. He was certain she wouldn't be mentioned in your Will and everything would revert to the way he expected things to be.

On Sunday, August 21 he drove out to the site the security team was searching. We had fifty people searching privately for us that weekend. Ana and Sawyer always stayed in base camp. There was also a small team there to prepare meals and keep things organized.

Physically and mentally, Ana was exhausted. She couldn't sleep without nightmares. She couldn't eat and had to be constantly reminded to drink. She had gotten into a habit of fainting but refused to see a doctor. It was the fainting that made me think she might be pregnant. I bought a few tests and they all came up positive. We kept it between us. She didn't want anyone else to know. Not even Sawyer or Gail. Being pregnant with your child gave her a reason for living. Then your father showed up.

I wasn't there but Sawyer says he was anything but gentle. He announced you had been officially declared dead. There would be a family memorial on Wednesday, August 24, after which your will would be read. He advised her she would have thirty days to leave Escala, not a day more. When she protested that you were still alive, he laughed and said he would have her declared mentally incompetent.

After he left, she asked to be alone. She went in her tent and didn't come out. Sawyer had notified me by satellite phone what was going on. I made my way back to find an ashen Sawyer rocking a distraught Ana. Within the hour, she miscarried. She refused to leave camp that night, so Sawyer and I stayed with her.

By sunset the camp was empty except for two sentries guarding the vehicles and watching out for paparazzi. I offered an IPhone box to place the fetus. Ana cut off a small piece of her silk teddy and placed it in the iPhone box. Baby Grey was less than 2 inches long. You could see his little fingers and toes, his eyes but no sex. Then she cut off some of your undershirts that she slept in and ever so gently covered Baby Grey. We weren't sure of the sex but Ana wanted Baby Grey to be near you, somehow.

Sawyer and I dug the grave. We all said a private prayer and then, together, The Lords Prayer. We marked the location with GPS and then filled in the dirt and coveted the site with small rocks and stones. Sawyer found a larger rock and carried it over to use as a marker. Night was falling fast as I carried her back to camp with Sawyer leading the way with a flashlight. She didn't talk, she didn't move. She wouldn't respond to either of us.

She was alive, and still bleeding, but her will to live was gone. Between your father and the miscarriage, she was done. I could feel it when I carried her. Her eyes were lifeless. We brought her to our tent because she needed cleaning up. I got a tarp down and then clean towels and laid her on top. Sawyer brought hot water that had cooled after boiling and I cleaned her up down there. I found some surgical pads in the surgical kit and place them under her. I could tell the bleeding was easing up but it was still unnerving. Give me a gunshot wound any day and I can handle it, but hemorrhage from a miscarriage? Definitely not my area of expertise. That was the first night we slept together. "

I hadn't been watching Grey. I probably should have. I have never talked about that day with anyone, even Sawyer. I kept staring up at the ceiling, trying to hold back the tears while I told him what happened. Remembering everything, the mosquitoes, the cry of a hawk nearby, the feel and smell of the dark moist dirt. I remembered it all like it happened yesterday, not five months ago.

Suddenly, Grey had his hands around my neck. "Why the fuck didn't you rush her to a hospital?" He demanded with tears running down his face. Then he dropped his head to my chest and cried.

Taylor tried to continue buts his eyelids were growing heavier with every passing second. " We couldn't have contained it. Rumors were everywhere, the media was handing out checks for five and six figures like candy. NDA's were being completely ignored. Everything had gone south without you at the helm. By mid afternoon of the next day, her bleeding had slowed to a small trickle. I dressed her and carried her to the car but she was still unresponsive. That's when I called Flynn." Taylor's words were coming slower and slower. Then they just stopped as his eyes closed.