"One more step and the virgin gets it!"
A whole squad of firebending soldiers and a platoon of weapon bearers had their fists and blades pointed on Aang and the handsome mask wearing rouge who at the moment had his twin katana's scissoring right at the Avatar's throat, with one thrust he could cut the last Airbender's head clean off.
Admiral Zhao of the Fire Nation army had Aang and the Blue Spirit pressed right on the strongholds closed gates with his command he could help complete their escape.
"I've heard of you Blue Spirit." Admiral Zhao said his voice and demeanor not at all affected by Blue's threat on the Avatar's life. "They say that you're as reckless as you are insane, but not stupid."
Blue didn't back down from Zhao's comment if anything he moved his blades closer to Aang only a hair's length away from his neck.
"Think about it if you release the Avatar back to me I'll not only see to it you are rewarded generously. But I also insure all your past crimes against the Fire Nation are dissolved."
The Blue Spirit thought about it for a second. "Mmmmm no I'm good I think I'll just kill baldy here like I did to the fifteen guards before we backed up against this gate."
Aang's eyes widened in terror "You mean you're really going to kill me!"
"Well I think I should after all it's your fault we even got caught."
"What!"
Blue sighed "If you hadn't been such a pansy every time I unalived one of Zhao's flunkies we wouldn't be in this mess!"
"You were cutting their heads off!"
"Ahhh but that's the best part!" Blue Spirit wined "I like the way the blood gushes out from their necks. It's like a geyser, you guys wanna see!" Blue pushed his swords away from Aang's neck only to pull them in at full force ready to decapitate.
"All right!" Zhao screamed out "You win we'll stand down!"
The admiral's was just in the nick of time for the swords where just about to be the same way.
"Yayyyyy I win of course I would have won ether way but still yay!"
Admiral Zhao told his men to stand down and open the gate.
Not backing down the Blue Spirit and Aang slowly stared to walk backwards out of the compound.
Aang let out a small sigh of relief "I was just wondering when this is over you're not going to try and sell me to the Fire Lord or anything right?"
The Blue Spirit was unusually quite as they peddled backwards.
"Ah Blue Spirit?"
"Shhhh quite Mushi I'm trying to use my big sexy brain to do some badass calculations."
"Mushi? My names not Mushi it's….."
Blue cut him off "Shhhh Aang, Kyoshi, Korra, Mushi you're all the same people just with a few personality quarks. Know quite I'm trying to pay attention."
Mindscape
Deep within the Mind of the Blue Spirit a giant chalk board was standing right in front of a mental projection of the Blue Spirit with a puff white wig and funny mustache. The mental Blue began writhing on the chalkboard. With the speed of lighting the mental Blue finished all the advanced calculations full of trajectories, high on potenuses, and quadratic formulas.
The Brainy Blue turned towards a regular Blue Spirit that was taking notes on a notebook. "So have you figured it out?"
"Yes!" the regular Blue Spirit turned his notebook around to show his intelligent counterpart what he wrote down.
Instead of Math all he had was an illustrated drawing of a human hand. The hand's ring finger and thumb were bent down while the other fingers were extended the index and middle fingers were kept together. The hand was right next to a detailed diagram of a woman's vagina "If I put two in the pink, and one in the stink I have a better shot of getting a woman to orgasm."
The Brainy counterpart threw his piece of chalk on the ground. "That…..is…..brilliant!" the mental projections danced around holding hands while celebrating the brake through.
Real World Based on a Cartoon Based on A Half Assed Fanfiction
"I'll call it the Shocker!" Blue Spirit yelled out in triumph.
"What are you talking about?" Aang asked getting more and more worried if he'd been a lot safer still being a Fire Nation prisoner.
"Wha? Nothing it's not something a super powered nerd like you needs to worry about. Just keep walking we're almost home free!"
Back to Zhao and His Men on Top of the Walkway of the Strong Holds Gate.
Admiral Zhao lowered a spyglass he was aiming at our two heroes' as a Yuyan Archer aimed an arrow right at the Blue Spirit's head.
"Do you have a clear shot?" Zhao asked.
The archer remained silent as if to say "Yes"
"Knock out that mask wearing menace, I'll deliver him to the Fire Lord along with the Avatar."
The Yuyan Archer released the arrow letting it sail to his target.
The Blue Spirit saw a projectile heading right for him. He shifted his head to the left to get a better look at it. "Hey look I think it's a bird." Instead of going for his head the arrow flew right into his face and landed in his eye.
"Son of a bitch right in the cornea!" Blue cried out in pain as his head rocked backwards form the force of the blow.
The masked rouge removed his swords from Aang's neck and placed them in the sheaths on his back.
"OH so you Assholes wanna play the archery game! That's fine, that's fine I know how to play too!" the Blue Spirit removed the arrow from his face pulling out his eye in the processes.
He turned towards Aang as the Avatar started yelling in horror as blood started gushing out of the eye hole of the Blue Spirit's mask. Aang's voice picked up in volume when the Blue Spirit pulled his eye off the arrow head and placed the severed organ in Aang's hand.
"Hold that for me while I do my thing."
Form out of nowhere the Blue Spirit pulled out a composite bow and used the same arrow that shot him for his final attack of the night. Unfortunately he had a hard time concentrating due to Aang's intensive crying.
"Oh man up you big baby it's just an eye. You're a hundred and twelve years old nut up already!"
As Aang quieted down but still sniffled the Blue Spirit couldn't help but think "I could have signed that contract with Korra but nooooooo I had to be in the original first. I could be busting heads with a beautiful Water Tribe warrior who plays for both teams right now then hang out with this dweeb. Oh well at least he makes a good tsukkomi."
"Admiral Zhao!" Blue Spirit yelled out in a deep voice "You have failed this city!" Blue let the arrow go and let it sail right back at the compound.
Said Admiral who had been so focused on where Blue pulled that bow form didn't see the projectile coming until it was too late. "What did he just…AHHHHHH Spirits damn it that abomination shoot me!"
Zhao fell to the floor clutching his leg "I took an arrow in the knee!" he yelled out.
"Yes!" Blue pumped his fist in victory. He put his bow away and took his eye back from Aang. As he placed his broken eye back in his socket he yelled out "Now for the archery trifecta!"
With his left hand Blue pulled down his pinky finger with his thumb over it giving out a salute with his three middle fingers raised straight up. "The odds are in our favor now, bitch!"
The Blue Spirit grasped Aang around his waist and hoisted him over his shoulders. He then ran down the road and towards the forest like a pack of wild ostrich horses.
While racing around the trees Blue throw Aang up in the air. The Avatar used his Airbending to land back on the ground as he started following the Spirit.
"Please tell me you planed all of this and that you're not some crazy guy in a mask who can get stabbed in the eye brushing it along with a massive amount of blood loss off."
"Well I could" the Blue Spirit said while coming to a stop. Only to turn around and say in a dark scary voice "But that'd be lying".
Aang abruptly came to a stop as well putting his feet to the ground as he created skid marks.
He looked right into the masked man's masked face. "What happens now?"
"Now, now I become your shadow! Think of me as your road dawg, your main man, your Yin to your goody toe shoes Yang!"
"And if I say no?" Aang asked causally.
"Well for one you'd hurt my feelings" he said sadly right before reeling his hand back and throwing out a shuriken right at Aang. The Avatar ducked out of the way to see the weapon lodge itself into a nearby tree cutting the restrains of someone tied around it.
"And number two if it wasn't for me this boychik would have been the one to save you. Only so he could score points from daddy."
Aang ran towards the fallen person. He bent down and turned him over to reveal the bondaged victim to be Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation.
The Avatar stumbled back in fear while Blue knelled down beside the fallen prince. "Yup it seems this wayward son can't carry on but he'll have no peace until he is done. He shouldn't' lay his weary head to rest or at least until he cries no more." Blue then started humming out a rift while playing a phantom guitar.
Aang just looked at the Blue Spirit and his nonsensical madness. "What is the matter with you we should be running right now those shoulders are properly catching up with use right now!"
Blue stopped rocking out and rocked back in "No they aren't silly while you approached our sweet prince here I set up a zig zag of razor wire all around the outside of the forest. Any minute now we'll hear the cry of bleeding soldiers as they start losing their lives and limbs!" Blue throw his hands up in the air as if he was being cheered on by an audience.
True to his words the sounds of agony enveloped the forest causing Aang to cover his ears in terror.
"You're a monster! Get away from me!" the Avatar ran as fast as he could blasting off with air to increase his speed and to get away from Blue.
"Aang this is war buddy it's ok to kill as long as it's for self-defense!" Blue without looking behind him caught a foreign objected that would have hit him on the head. Looking at his hand he saw that he had caught a Fire Nation solders severed head.
"Oh I bet Aang would get a kick out of this Yo AANG!" Blue bellowed out as he ran to catch up with the future master of all elements.
Just as they left Zuko started to stir and wake up "ahhhh what happened to me" he groaned out as he clutched his forehead in pain.
"Nothing go back to sleep we'll see you when you come back with June!" a voice yelled from the woods right as Zuko got knocked back out form a severed head that seemed to come out of nowhere.