At this point you're likely wondering why Alex wasn't in school. And make no mistake, it wasn't for lack of trying.
When the spring semester began mere weeks after the Fowl Star, Artemis sent the 7-year-old off to their school in Dublin, planning to use the time to stabilize the Fowl finances and begin searches for their father. This plan failed three days later, when a very tired Alex showed up on the doorstep one afternoon, asking for a sandwich. He'd snuck off school grounds, gotten on a bus, and hitchhiked a full kilometer back to the manor—all just minutes before the school even realized he was missing.
After this, it was decided that Alex would remain at Fowl manor. If this was for better or worse, however, is debatable.
Whether from his father's presumed death or his mother's decaying mental state or some other reason all together, Alex's present issues began not long after the school year began.
It started as a single sleepless night, then it became a string of days when Alex was so tired he'd randomly drop off, often during meals. The infrequent night he did sleep almost it was almost certain he'd be at someone's door—wide-eyed and slightly shaken—within an hour or two. Alex could never say what was so troubling about his nightmares, primarily because he forgot them almost instantly.
Artemis tried to remedy the situation on his own—which, naturally, only made things worse.
Giving the boy a sleep-aiding tea before bed seemed to work for a while, at least it provided him a few hours of relatively peaceful sleep. However, it proved too effective when he began sleepwalking. At first he would simply wander into the living room or the foyer, but once he started getting out of the house measures needed to be taken. Alex's subconscious seemed to take this as a challenge. Every time a new security device was installed to keep him in his room, he'd get into a more dangerous area. An automatic lock was put on the door, and he'd go onto the roof. A camera was put in his room, and he'd go into Artemis's private lab. After one night, only referred to as the Bathtub Incident, Artemis decided to contact a professional.
That left them here, 20 months and 4 therapists later.
As for Artemis's current plan to swindle the People out of a fortune's worth of gold, well from Alex's perspective it was just business as usual.
After the night he helped his brother translate the Book, Alex was cut out of the loop. He knew that shortly after Artemis and Butler started going out once a month with no real explanation. He couldn't not try to tag along but being left basically unsupervised was fun too.
The first time he just tried nagging. Just the basic bargaining and carrying on any kid would know how to do, with a bit of clinging to Butler's sleeve for added measure. It didn't work, but it was worth a shot.
He ended up sitting on the living room floor with Juliet, watching old and current wrestling matches. She occasionally muted the announcer to give him the play-by-play or to explain something. When he got a good grasp on things they ended up moving all the furniture to the edges of the room for a live demonstration.
Artemis and Butler came home to find Alex attempting to hold his babysitter/bodyguard, a girl twice his age, in a comedic-looking full nelson on the floor.
The next time, in October, he tried being sneaky. He slipped into the car before Artemis and Butler got there, got on the floor of the backseat, and covered himself with a dark blanket. Good security man that he is, Butler caught him immediately. Maybe not his best work, but it was the effort that counted.
For the rest of that night Alex was in the kitchen. A byproduct of his insomnia was that he was up and at 'em at 2 or 3 am, and, lately, he'd been feeling bad about waking Butler up at that hour to cook for him. So Alex resolved to learn how to make spinach and ham quiches—his favorite 3 am breakfast. Unfortunately, the ability to tell when eggs were fully cooked proved to be more difficult than he thought. Even under Juliet's instruction he went through 2 cartons of eggs before giving up and moving onto another dish. And another. And another.
By the time Artemis and Butler returned, the kitchen was so thoroughly wrecked that it took the manservant two days to get it completely clean again.
His next idea was also a classic, and just extreme enough to work. But only a few minutes after he got into position, Butler found him while conducting his usual bomb check. A ten-minute lecture about the dangers of clinging to the underside of a soon-to-be-moving car later and he was sent back inside.
The rest of the night was better. Juliet had to go out to do a random perimeter check, which she brought him along with because, in her exact words, he was "one of maybe five little boys who isn't scared of the dark, even a little." She spent the next hour carrying him around the manor grounds on her back, giving him every detail he could ever need or want about both the natural defenses of the land or the state-of-the-art security system. He wasn't sure why she told him all this, and asked her as much. Turns out she loved watching her brother chase Alex around more than anyone.
When they finally got back he went up on the roof, Juliet, thankfully, was nice enough to leave him in his unofficial hideout. Going on the roof had accidentally become his favorite pastime, mainly because he needed someplace calm to go at the late hours when he couldn't sleep and didn't want to wake the Butlers or Mum up—or send Artemis into a panic. Even if his brother thought it was dangerous, he liked to stargaze, and this was the best spot he ever knew. Most times if he wasn't doing that he was catching bugs up there or in the garden. Alex liked bugs, no one was certain when this started, and his bizarre lack of fear of the dark allowed him to hunt for them at all hours.
Artemis and Butler seemed to arrive earlier that night.
His last idea very nearly worked, unfortunately he overestimated how heavy Butler's maybe-not-lethal rifle was and the big man noticed the weight difference the instant he picked up the duffel bag.
Lucky for him, Juliet pulled all the babysitting stops by declaring it to be game night. They started with the basic board games—Monopoly, Sorry, Battleship. But those soon became boring, so they moved to card games. Uno was already banned, so Juliet taught him how to play poker. "It's a valuable life skill," was all she said. Then that became boring. Alex suggesting going with a game he knew, which led to a very intense game of The Floor is Lava. The older girl lost when Alex's balance failed him on a board he was using to get from the loveseat to the coffee table and nearly landed on a vase they'd broken earlier. So they decided to add onto her lesson from last month—maybe less exciting but less of a chance for injury.
The two of them snuck up to Artemis's, formerly his father's, study, and she told him about each camera in the manor halls and how each one moved, and so on. He momentarily distracted her by asking her about the intercom system, which of course led to their best Artemis impersonations over it. And, of course, he altered his room's camera feed while she was distracted—after all if was going to be mischievous he at least had to make sure her hands were clean.
Unlike last month, this time he knew Artemis and Butler returned early—the pair couldn't have been gone more than a couple hours. And the way Juliet hustled him to his room for bed only confirmed it. Unfortunately, she remembered to lock the door.
But that was hardly a problem.
Artemis put the computer to sleep and crossed to the main doors. Time for a little chat with their guest. Just as his fingers slighted on the brass handles, the door flew open before him. Juliet appeared in the doorway, cheeks flushed from haste.
"Artemis," she gasped. "Your mother. She…"
Artemis felt a lead ball drop in his stomach.
"Yes?"
"Well, she says, Artemis… Artemis, that your…"
"Yes, Juliet. For heaven's sake, what is it?"
Juliet placed both hands over her mouth, composing herself. After several seconds she parted spangled nails, speaking through her fingers.
"It's your father, sir. Artemis Senior, Madam Fowl says he's come back!"
For a split second, Artemis could have sworn his heart had stopped. Father? Back? Was it possible? Of course he'd always believed his father was alive. But lately, since he'd hatched this fairy scheme, it was almost as if his father had shifted to the back of his mind. Artemis felt guilt churn in his stomach, Alex's face flashing in his mind. He had given up. Given up on his own father.
"Did you see him, Juliet? With your own eyes?"
The girl shook her head.
"No, Artemis, sir. I just heard voices. In the bedroom. But she won't let me through the door. Not for anything. Not even with a hot drink."
Artemis calculated. They had returned barely an hour ago. His father could have slipped past Juliet and Alex. With how distracted they got on their nights alone, it was possible. Just possible. He glanced at his watch, synchronized with Greenwich Mean Time by constantly updated radio signals. Three A.M. Tiem was ticking on. His entire plan depended on the fairies making their next move before daylight.
Artemis started. He was doing it again, pushing family to one side. What was he becoming? His father was the priority here, not some moneymaking scheme.
Juliet was still in the doorway, watching him with those enormous blue eyes. She was waiting for him to make a decision, as he always did. and for once, there was indecision scrawled across his pale features.
"Very well," he mumbled eventually. "I had better go up there immediately."
Artemis brushed past the girl, taking the steps two at a time. His mother's room was two flights up, a converted attic space.
He hesitated at the door. What would he say if it was his father miraculously returned? What would he do? It was ridiculous dithering about it. Impossible to predict. He knocked lightly.
"Mother?"
No response, bu the thought he heard a giggle and was instantly transported into the past. Initially this room had been his parents' lounge. They would sit on the chaise longue for hours, tittering like schoolchildren, feeding the pigeons or watching the ships sailing past on Dublin sound. When Artemis Senior disappeared, Angeline Fowl had become more and more attached to the space, eventually refusing to leave altogether.
"Mother? Are you alright?"
Muffled voices from within. Conspiratorial whispers.
"Mother. I'm coming in."
"Wait a moment. Timmy, stop it, you beast. We have company."
Timmy? Artemis's heart thumped like a snare drum in his chest. Timmy, her pet name for his father. Timmy, Arty, and Alex. The three men in her life. He could wait no longer. Artemis burst through the double doors.
His first impression was of light. Mother had the lamps on. A good sign surely. Artemis knew where his mother would be. He knew exactly where to look. But he couldn't. What if… What if…
"Yes, can we help you?"
Artemis turned, his eyes downcast. "It's me."
His mother laughed. Airy and carefree.
"I can see it's you, Papa. Can't you even give your boy one night off? It is our honeymoon after all."
Artemis knew then. It was just an escalation of her madness. Papa? Angeline thought Artemis was his own grandfather. Dead over ten years. He raised his gaze slowly.
His mother was seated on the chaise longue, resplendent in her own wedding dress, face clumsily coated with makeup. But that wasn't the worst of it.
Beside her was a facsimile of his father, constructed from the morning suit he'd worn on the glorious day in Christchurch Cathedral fourteen years ago. The clothes were padded with tissue, and atop the dress shirt was a stuffed pillowcase with lipstick features. It was almost funny. Artemis choked back a sob, his hopes vanishing like a summer rainbow.
"What do you say, Papa?" said Angeline in a deep bass, nodding the pillow like a ventriloquist manipulating her dummy. "One night off for your boy, eh?"
Artemis nodded. What else could he do?
"One night then. Take tomorrow, too. Be happy."
Angeline's face radiated honest joy. She sprang from the couch, embracing her unrecognized son.
"Thank you, Papa. Thank you."
Artemis returned the embrace, though it felt like cheating.
"You're welcome, Mo—Angeline. Now, I must be off. Business to attend to."
His mother settled beside her imitation husband.
"Yes, Papa. You go, don't worry, we can keep ourselves amused.
Artemis left the room. He didn't look back.
But when got out the doorway, there was a wet hiccup from the side. He looked, and there was Alex.
"We read two chapters, she remembered all the names, she knew where the places in the book were," the little boy babbled, his voice breaking occasionally. "She was getting better."
Artemis sighed quietly, bringing the younger boy into his side with one arm and led him away from the room.