Chapter 12: HeartBreak

Author's note!

Chapter 11 happens after Ethan and Ana have their kiss in bed. Ethan will reveal his motivations of pretending he's slept with Ana and as you've all requested, Christian will reveal everything he has done with Leila.

In addition! My story takes place after Christian reveals everything about his mom and asks her to marry him. Hope it clears up some confusion!

Please do leave a review so I know where to better improve! Thank you.

Even though I had leaped into the lift and furiously pressed for the penthouse, Taylor had stepped in to prevent the doors from shutting. He cast me a reprimanding look like I was a child who just did something very naughty. We waited patiently for Christian and Sawyer, who had picked up the cheque and joined our group.

"Mr Grey." Taylor nodded at his boss and moved aside, allowing Christian to take his place.

The doors shut as Taylor and Sawyer stood in the foyer, their lips pressed into tight lines. Very subtly, I cringed towards the elevator walls, knowing full well what sexual tension this lift coerces out of our systems.

Christian stared ahead at the metal. He made no move to engage me, which was probably his way of punishing me for throwing out such an expensive gift of his. If I had accepted that money, I would have sealed my own reputation as a whore.

A really expensive whore, my inner goddess smacked her lips. She was styled in designer wear from head to toe and was currently deciding which of her over the top handbags would match the best.

It seemed like light years before the elevator doors opened, the two men already awaiting us in the apartment.

"What would you like to do today, Ana?" Christian asked without so much as a glance at me, strolling out of the lift.

"I think it's only right if you go see Dr Flynn." I replied, giving him the cold shoulder.

Spinning around in his leather shoes, Christian silenced me with his intense gaze. "As a matter of fact, he's scheduled here in a few hours."

"Well, good." I retorted, rolling my eyes as I skipped past him and made a beeline for the kitchen.

Mrs Jones greeted me with a beam. "Breakfast for you, Ms Steele?" She chirped, brightening my day instantly.

I shook my head at her and seized one of the high stools. Christian arrived shortly, hovering behind me. "Don't roll your eyes at me, Ana."

"I'd say don't cheat on me, but you did anyway." I muttered under my breath, too quiet for Christian's deaf ears to pick up on.

But Mrs Jones did and she flushed the brightest red, shuffling out of the kitchen at a worrisome speed.

"What was that, Ms Steele?" Christian questioned, his voice edgy.

"Nothing." I responded, swiveling in the chair. Quickly, I changed the subject. "The cheque?"

I heard him sigh from behind me. " It's in it's billions, it won't make it through the bank that easily. I'd have to clear it first, so nobody will be that much richer if they pick it up."

Good.

"Ana, we need to talk about Ethan."

"No, we don't." I snapped.

"You've been..." He searched for the right word. "Sleeping with him." There was bitterness and anger within that tone and my own began to rise. What right did he have to judge me?

"An eye for an eye, don't you think?" I hissed smartly.

I heard him groan. "Turn around, I want to look at you when we talk."

"We're not going to talk about Ethan and I." I stated firmly, annoyance dripping in my words.

He was raking his copper hair with both hands now, I could see it through the marble of the bar. I was definitely getting under his skin and rubbing him in all the wrong places.

"BUT YOU ARE MINE, ANA!" I jumped at his volume. "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BELONG TO ME!"

I clenched my fists as he continued. "IT MADE ME SO FURIOUS WHEN I FOUND OUT FROM ELLIOTT. AND TO HEAR YOU CONFIRM IT. HECK, ANA!"

He walked towards me, shaking in anger. "YOU'RE MINE, ANA! AND NOW YOU'VE SHARED YOURSELF WITH THAT F***ER."

I was not going to sit here and let him talk about Ethan in that manner. "Are you done yet?"

I was not going to give him the satisfaction of clearing my name in his mind either. Landing on my feet, I turned to wave at an seething red Christian. "You ruined my morning, so let me sleep."

For some reason, his face softened. "Alright, I'll join you." He said through gritted teeth, his anger not fully under control.

The anger rose within me and my eyebrows knitted together, I narrowed my eyes into slits once more. The idiot thinks he can waltz back into my bed after what he had done. Okay, maybe it was his bed, but still.

"Nah thanks." I snapped once again, sarcasm stinging strong. Turning on my heel, I stalked pass the main bedroom and up the stairs.

"Where are you going?"

"Up to the sub room," I explained, "Where I belong?"

"Ana, don't!" He sounded alarmed, panicked.

I could hear my heart stop, my chest constricting so tightly that I was barely able to breathe. It can't be. My brain continued to work it's way around the situation, calculating, rationalizing.

Christian's worry... I had left him alone for a long time. It was possible. It was plausible. Hell, I was certain of it. I felt the tears in my eyes build up, threatening to brim. The agony was overwhelming. It was as if I was struggling to stay afloat, flailing my arms to stay afloat in our relationship.

Trying to maintain my composure, I rotated myself to face the cheater head on. The grey searched me, alarm clear in them.

I envisioned myself opening the sub room only to find Leila's belongings occupying every inch of it. The idea was torturous enough, stepping on my neck and suffocating me. She would meet him in the right position every few hours in the playroom. I would sit in a new room, listening to what I failed to do for him. That she could.

My inadequacy.

"It's Leila's room now, isn't it?" Then, the dam broke and a flood of tears washed over me.

Christian hurried to me, but I shoved him away. He recoiled, stung by my rejection. I began heaving as the tears picked up strength. She would appear now, somewhere. Or had Christian sent her out of the apartment for now?

"Baby," he crooned, hurt clear in his voice. "Leila's gone. I sent her to a psych ward out of state."

That took me by surprise. He sent her away? "Why?" I sobbed.

"She's very sick, Ana." He took a wary step towards me.

He made love to her, then he sent her away. He made love to her when she was mentally unstable. If that was the case, his making love to her clearly did not 'heal' Leila at all.

"Ana, I don't love Leila." Another step.

He cautioned me with his eyes, as if he was a hunter cornering a deer. Any wrong move, any wrong speed, would send me fleeing.

With exaggerated slowness, he said firmly. "I. Love. You. Ana."

Suddenly, he was too close. His words were too wrong. Everything felt queer. I felt trapped. I covered my ears with my hands, pressing against them tightly as I bolted up the stairwell.

"ANA!" I heard him yell after me.

But by the time he had realized I was gone, I had already covered so much distance that he was unable to catch up in time. The moment I burst through the sub room, I slammed the door behind me and locked it.

My eyes searched the room. It was empty. I just could not understand. Surely, I had expected her to be here. Christian must have lied, I wanted to prove to myself that he did. But here I was. In a deserted and chilly room.

Leila's voice filled my mind. "All alone."

I sunk to the floor by the door, surrendering to the pain that was swallowing me whole. "Ana." Christian's voice soothed me from behind it. "Open the door, sweetheart."

I cupped my ears harder, sealing any gaps between my fingers to try and keep him out. But it was to no avail. "Ana, please don't cry."

So I didn't. I wailed at the top of my lungs.

Everything was so wrong. Everything was so broken. We had been getting along so well, he shared his darkest secrets, the ones I had been craving for since day one. He even asked me to marry him. I crossed my arms over my chest and leaned into the door for support, shaking as my tears tore me apart.

Christian had swept me off my feet. I had given him my heart, my all. And in return, he had cheated on me. Now, without Ethan, my situation was devout of any humor. Nothing about it was funny.

"Ana, baby." Christian tried again. "You're all there is to me. Please don't cry."

As much as his sweet words could do, it only made matters worse. How could I mean as much to him as he said I did but still, he cheated on me? How? This was not possible. So that must mean he was lying.

"I hurt you, Ana." I heard him drop to his knees. The door quivered slightly as he hit it on his way down. I opened my eyes to see the silhouette of his knees beside me, just through the door. His next words were almost inaudible. "I'm sorry I did,I'm sorry."

Christian and I were both breathing heavily against the door. He was just there. So close but yet so far.

As if he was a strong magnet, my treacherous body responded. I swiveled around to face the door and gently placed my palms against it.

Still sobbing, I closed my eyes and pressed my ear against the door, imagining his arms around me. I willed everything to be okay. My body desired him, my heart still belonged to him, but every time I looked at him I was reminded of his betrayal.

"I'm sorry, Ana." He whispered, I could hear his breathing stagger. "I don't want to lose you."

My heart had been shattered into a million pieces and it was beyond salvage now. He had always used that same words to assure me of his love. But just as I had said from the beginning, I was never going to leave him. He had left me on his own.

"Can I come in?" He asked for permission. When I didn't answer, he spoke a little louder. "Ana, baby? Can I come in?"

Yes! My inner goddess cheered, itching for us to kiss and make up.

I knew that I had only managed to rationalize my coming back to Escala because deep down, I desperately wanted to be by Christian's side. No matter what he had done, I was not able to slaughter that part of me that wanted him to be mine again. Truth be told, I was weak for Christian.

Despite everything, I still loved him. But every thought of him with Leila, kept the distance between us growing.

"Ana?"

"No." I countered, the tears still fresh and flowing. "Please. Don't come in."

There was a long pause. "Ana, I'll be here for you." Another tear slipped down my cheek. "Always."

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