Chapter 14

WARNINGS: There are a few warnings involved in the chapter so read at your own risk; mentions of rape, child abuse, death/murder, starving. I think that is all, so please if you are sensitive to this please skip it. These parts are in when they are talking about their pasts; so again please DO NOT read if you are triggered by this.

Notes: Welcome back everyone! sad to say this might be the end of my weekly updates, as this is my last pre-written chapter. :( I am going to try to type more next week, but I have so much homework that needs to get done, and it is only my first week back into college. So I apologize in advance for long periods with out updates, as my education comes first. With all that being said I do hope that you like this potential last weekly update, an it is extra special one as well! Enjoy~~

Eren's POV

Christmas was a fun day for everyone, what Erwin did for us was took us all ice skating, Petra showed up during that time and joined us laughing along when I always fell on my ass. If I wasn't on my ass, I was clinging to Levi for dear life as he tried his best to teach me to skate. Afterwards Petra gave me a update on if anyone has seen my monster of a dad the last couple of months along with as much news she could gather from friends at the police stations on what the updates where.

Today was New Year's Eve, the beginning of a new year along with a new me; or some bullshit like that. I never really liked celebrating a new year, it was just always going to end up begin like the last, nothing really changes for me each year. Of course it seem to be different this year, instead of some shitty house with foster parents, I was with real friends this year. I was smiling, laughing, and even trying my best to overcome my past.

I had a great plan for today, I was going to tell Levi the rest of my past, all of my dark secrets and then confess my feelings for him. It was time that I opened up to someone about this stuff, and what better way than to leave it in the previous year and start it with a happy moment? I was nervous at what I was going to do, but I was also very ready to share all this information with someone. I hope that he would still like me even after I tell him everything, and that he would also accept my feelings too. It is now just a matter of time before I tell everything that had happened to me, and it felt like forever. To pass the time I hung out with Armin and Mikasa sharing jokes, watching TV, and playing some games.

Levi's POV

I had scrubbed every surface possible at least twice in this big ass house, trying to keep my mind off tonight. Tonight might just seem like a regular new year, but I was going to tell Eren some things that very few people knew. I don't like to dwell on my past, but I felt that I needed to share it with Eren if I was going to make a move on him anytime soon. It was something that he needed to know, that anyone I got close to was destined to be harmed. All I could think of was Isabel and Farlan, and how they were my only family that I ever had; how could one secret bring such devastation?

I shook my head clear of those thoughts, I don't need to be thinking of them just yet. I needed to keep these thoughts away till tonight. That was the import thing; it was then I would show Eren my true side, show Eren my trust, and my affections as well. Till then I need the distraction of cleaning.

~Time skip~

I was laying on my bed just after taking a shower, after all the cleaning I had done, I felt that I could use a shower to get of all the dirt that might have accumulated on me. I was just thinking of how I could get Eren away from his friends for the beginning of the New Year; when I heard the door open. I looked up and saw Eren making his way into the room, when he saw me laying on the bed he smiled at me; that smile was so contagious, that I ended up smiling back. I opened my mouth to ask him if I could talk to him before the New Year when he held a finger to his lips to indicate to be quiet. I raised an eyebrow in question waiting to see what he would say.

"I need to talk to you, but not here" he said, his voice soft and unsure, for whatever reason, "Put on a jacket and follow me." He said as he picked up his own dark green hoodie. I did as I was told, getting up from the bed grabbing my jacket that was hanging on my desk chair. He open the door slowly, poking his head out seeing if anyone would notice us leaving, he then waved at me as to indicate to follow him. He slowly made his way to the stair case that lead up to the attic.

"I hope this isn't a way for you to kill me away from everyone," I said nervously while trailing him, Eren just laughed at me. He made his way to the window at the other side of the attic, opening it up and putting his foot on the edge as he leaned out grabbing the edge of the roof and hoisting his way up. I watch, scared of him falling to his death, "Eren I don't think this is such a good idea." I said as I tried to keep him from falling.

"Its fine Levi, I have done this before," He stated as he poked his head back into the window, "this is the only place I know of to talk tonight without interruptions." I sighed, doing exactly what he did and slowly making my way onto the roof with him. I felt his hands steading me, making sure that I had my footing before making his way across the roof, waving me after him once again. I followed at a much slower pace, keeping my eyes on my feet the whole time to make sure that I wouldn't fall.

Eren took a hold of my arm once more but continued walking next to the chimney to block some of the wind that was gently blowing tonight, taking a seat and laying on his back to stare at the night sky. I mimicked him, just to have my breath taken away from the view of the billions of stars that we were able to see. Eren smiled at my reaction, as he continued to stare into the dark abyss called the nighttime sky.

"Levi, I thought tonight would be a good time as any to tell you more about myself." He said in a soft whisper as he continued, "As you know my father killed my mother almost a decade ago, I ran to get away from the man, just as my mother told me. I tried to get to the front door and run or at least scream loud enough for the neighbors to hear, but I didn't make it. I was tackled to the floor by my father; he then proceeded to beat me within an inch of my life." I tense next to Eren as he explains that night's events, happy that he didn't have to face them anymore, but still sad that this boy had to go through something like that. I didn't think of what I was doing, I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him towards me on this cold night, as he told this dark tell. "Before he finished the job he stopped, and took me down to the basement of our house, a place that was always forbidden to my mother and I. There I saw animals that where begin kept in cages, some dying, others already dead. Another part of it was a whole lab that was set up to create vaccinations to give the subjects, as to test them on. From then on I was one of those animals. I was beaten, starved, and rapped in that basement. My father tested everything on me after animal use to see the effects that it would have on humans. If things didn't go his way he would take it out on me by withholding food, giving generous helpings of beatings, and other days he would bring another man down and let him have his way with me. I was in that basement for a year and half before someone reported strange noises from there. A day before the police came down to investigate what was going on in the basement, my Father had taken everything out from there and killed ever animal test subject. As for me, he beat me, leaving me to die in my cage before the police could find me." His face was now soaked with tears, his voice trembling along with his body as he relived the life he had lived before he was rescued. "I was picked up by the police the next day, hanging to life by a thread, I was in the hospital for about 5 months due to severity of some wounds, the malnutrition of my body, and the state of my mental stability. It was after all of that I was finally placed in my first foster home." He cracked a small smile, the first he had since begin his story. I choked back my own tears now. "It was the house with Marco, he was 8 and I was 7, he taught me how to be a kid again; before everything went south again. Apparently my father found out that I was still alive. He came to the foster house; Marco and the nice couple were home while I was at the shrink per the doctor's order after my release from the hospital. Petra had brought me back to the house, where we found the couple murdered in the living and Marco bloody and beat in the kitchen, but none the less alive. He had told Marco, to inform me that I was to die by his hands. After that I was thrown around in the system to lessen the likely hood of him ever finding me. That was till a few years ago, when it seemed like he would've given up on looking for me, but has not lessened my fears." He had finished telling me of his past, ashamed of what had happen to him. I held him closer to me, happy that he was here with me now.

Eren's POV

I was nervous on what Levi would think of me, I had just spilled everything from my dark past to him. That was till I felt his arms tighten around me, pulling me closer to his warm chest, my face cold from where the tears had fallen.

"Oh Eren," he said placing a tender kiss on my forehead, "Thank you for telling me this, I know how hard this was for you to tell me. I think that I should tell you something about me, seeing as you have had enough courage to tell me everything about you." I opened my mouth in protest going to say that if he wasn't ready then he didn't have to. "Brat, before you say anything about not having to, I want to." I froze a moment before nodding at him. Of course I was happy that he would be telling me something about himself, since I don't know much about his past, but I was upset thinking that he felt obligated that he had to tell me his past now, all because I had told him mine.

"I know what you are thinking, but I wanted to tell you about my past before you ever dragged me up here, you brat." Levi took a breath, thinking about where to begin. I wrapped my arms around his waist like he had done for me, resting my head on his chest since he didn't want me to move away from him. "Let see, I think first I should tell you about my mother. She was a sweet person, who had a bad hand dealt to her; she was disowned by her family shortly after she found out she was going to have me, from there she was living on the street, in shitty motels looking for odd jobs to keep herself and me alive to see the next day. It was when I was 8 she fell ill and never got better, I was then on my own. I was found shortly after her passing by a man that claimed to be my uncle, his name was Kenny. I never really saw him that much but he sent money to the landlord of whatever apartment, or motel that I was placed in. He also gave me some money to buy food that I needed but not much after that. It was about a couple years after Kenny I ran into another kid that was living off the street. His name was Farlan, I helped him for a bit before we ran into a spunky red head named Isabel. For about three years we caused trouble by joining a local gang. They were like my brother and sister, and we always had each other's backs. One day I was running late from a job that I was hired for; when I arrived to the small apartment that we were calling home for a time. There was my friend laying on the cold floor, dead, and a man sitting in the chair waiting for me. The same man that had taken me in after my mother's passing; Kenny had shown up at our house enraged at me. One thing that I didn't tell Isabel or Farlan was that Kenny was trying to train me take over his rule of the Ackerman's, a group of people for hire, like a group of hitman. Of course I did as I was told at first collecting and saving all the money I could from the jobs, but after I ran into Farlan and Isabel I ran away from everything. This was Kenny's revenge for everything, and he told me to come back or face the same fate as they did. Of course I was ready and willing to die like them, but then the police came bursting in, they tried to take Kenny in but he somehow escaped shortly after, and I ended up here with Erwin." His voice only wavered at the mentioning of Farlan and Isabel, but other than that it stayed strong.

We sat in silence now, waiting for the year to end and another the next to begin while we laid there holding each other and staring at the stars above us.

"Levi," I said at the same time Levi said my own name. We paused a moment before chuckling,

"You can go first," I said looking into his blue gray eyes.

"Alright," he coughed, his cheeks betraying him with a slight pink tone creeping up, "well, I-I don't know where to begin."

I smiled, knowing what he was going to say, "Levi, I think I know what you are about to say," I leaned up on my elbow, placing my face inches away from his. His breath hitched at the sudden movement. "Levi, I have come to like you, as more than a friend. I haven't felt like this ever before," I mumbled, a blush creeping into my own cheeks, either from the cold or embarrassment, or maybe a little bit of both.

"Eren," his voice was now a soft whisper as he closed the gap between us, our lips brushed each other's. Little did we know, that the New Year had closed in and our friends were now below us celebrating. He pulled back a little now, one of his hands placed on my cheek, smiling at me. "I am happy that you feel that way. I was afraid that I was the only one."

I just shook my head, giving him another kiss. "I am just as happy as you are, I was scared that after you heard everything that you might not want me." I said, "but I am happy that I was proven wrong."

We stayed up there for a while longer, enjoying each other's company, watching the moon and stars, innocently unaware of what was to come in the near future for us.