Chapter 14: Pep-talk
Author's note!
Hello everyone! Hope Christmas has done all of you well and Boxing Day a charm for all. I didn't get any presents this year. Sigh. Alright, I'll have to be honest and say that I'm reaching a writer's block. So… yup. Enjoy this, hopefully!
"You're acting like a cheap slut, Ana!" Kate yelled, almost slapping me across my face.
But her words were enough to do it. I recoiled from her as if she had. Kate did not back down, " The jerk cheated on you and you give him the green light to your lady parts?!"
I swallowed in embarrassment. Neither Kate or Elliott should have seen that. Oh hell. Flynn and Taylor and the rest of the security details are sure to have seen it too. I flushed bright red, casting my eyes to the floor.
Kate paced up and down whilst I sat still on the bed. " If you wanted sex so much, why can't you just go to Ethan?!" She pretty much hollered. I flinched. Christian would have heard that. I had no doubt he was watching us from the cameras now.
Then she halted in her steps and spun to glare at me. "Are you cheating on Ethan?!"
I gawked at her in awe then realized she had every right to be piping mad. This was yet another misunderstanding I had to clean up. "We never had sex, Kate." I said the words slowly. "We were just lying about it."
Her mouth hung in disbelief and she turned furious, I thought she was about to combust. "WHO THE HELL WOULD DO THAT."
Loud enough so that Christian would not have to strain to hear, I explained. "We slept together, literally. Just sleeping. On the same bed."
Kate hands found her hips and she gripped them for support. Then, her eyes sparked as she thought of something. "But you like him right?" When I failed to answer, she lifted a finger in accusation. "You like Ethan! I know it."
Yet another of Kate's inquisitions, I would never win against her. Quickly, I diverted the attention. "Ethan says he's not sure he wants to pursue me." I pointed out, using his same words.
Kate considered it and then took a step towards me, I leaned back. She smirked. "He's talked to me about this." She started, crossing her arms.
Why was I not surprised? The Kavanaghs were like peas in a pod, sharing every secret with each other. "When?" I pursed my lips, not fond of being the topic of conversation.
"That day when he begged me to return to the apartment." She stated. "It's not that he's unsure," I begged to differ. "Ana, you're obtuse!"
"What!" I yelled in defense.
She snapped her fingers in my face. "Ethan doesn't want to be your rebound, Ana."
"Rebound?" I squeaked.
Her eyebrows furrowed and I thought she was about to strangle me. "Yes? Like, you jumping from Mr Moneybags to my brother just because Christian sucks?"
"I'd never!" I whined, trying to defend myself.
"Oh, trust me." She sounded annoyed. "A girl can do silly things when she's HORNY."
At her tone, I knew she was referring to my recent event with Christian. I flushed. Had I been silly? But Christian had known just when to strike, his words had been so honest and we had cleared up so much doubt between us that my hurt was lessened by more than half.
At first it had seemed impossible for us to get together again, as every time his hands would be to caress me or his lips to brush against mine, I would be reminded of his betrayal. But now, knowing that Leila had not claimed them this time round made everything much better.
Maybe I had been clouded by his flattery, knowing that his body would belong to me in this manner and not to Leila. I once again saw her smirk as I was made to leave my apartment and flinched, the wound was still raw. But it was healing.
"But I know him more than you do." I defended fifty, my defenseless little fifty.
"Well, to me, he's just pushing you about." Kate blustered. "You're always unhappy ever since he came into your life!"
That was not true! Kate had just been there when I was suffering from his rogue side. She had not been there when he had taken me out on such grand dates, had not been there when...
"He's asked me to marry him."
I watched as Kate's jaw fell. There was a moment of silence as she contemplated what I had just said.
I knew that if I was going to fault him for every mistake he had made, I would open the pandora box that was his past too. Mrs Robinson would come tumbling in, and there would be the pain of his having intercourse with probably a hundred other women. Leila was just one of them.
A thought crossed my mind. What if I let his attempt with Leila slip this time? This time. Would I be signifying that cheating on me could be a past time of his? It hurt just thinking about it.
"When?" Kate demanded. "Before or after he had sex with another woman?"
My response was not going to be in favor of Kate's approval. "After."
"Exactly!" Kate snapped. "It's the guilt talking."
"He just doesn't want me to leave him."
"Because he knows you should." She growled. "I have never seen anybody so calm after they have been cheated on." Kate put both hands on either of my shoulders. "NEVER!"
"Because he's all I want, Kate." I told her and watched her eyes grow. "I know we're in a sticky situation, but I want to work this out with him."
"Stop defending him, damn it." Kate spat. "Ana, he still cheated on you, he cheated, Ana!"
He did. He really did. I folded my arms and withdrew my knees to my chest. I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head repeatedly at her words, I had spent so long repeatedly telling myself that even though he did, he had no intention to do so.
"I'm just so confused." I whined, pressing my palms against my ears and rocking from side to side.
Taking pity on me, Kate lowered herself to the space beside me. She wrapped her arm around me and hugged me tightly, giving me a small kiss against my head. "I know, baby, I know."
I turned to face her, returning the hug and enjoying her right embrace. Kate drew me in tighter. "It's the first love problem, sweetie. You just don't want to let go of your very first love, because he's your first."
I nodded against her hold, knowing that it was true. I had tried so much to rationalize all his actions to make it right, to make me believe in Christian once again. He was the only one I wanted, the only one I had ever wanted since I had first met him.
" No matter how much you love him, Ana, what he did was unacceptable."
"I know."
"And right now, I know you're very confused." She cooed, stroking me. "But you can't give him leeway just because he gives you some silly excuse. He still cheated on you."
"He's going to confuse you whenever he says he loves you and justifies his actions, Ana. But you have to hold on to the memory of the pain you went through." She whispered into my ear. "Until the day you no longer feel that pain, he can step back into your life."
Suddenly, Kate was vibrating. She pulled away slightly to answer her phone. It was brief. "See you." She ended the call and placed it back into her pocket.
"Ethan's coming up in a bit." Kate said and I jerked back into focus.
"What?" I whispered. A showdown between Christian and Ethan would be the last on my to-do list. I had planned to lengthen that list and put off such a clash until the anger slipped out of Christian's mind.
"You left so suddenly," she threw me an irritated look. "He had to come say goodbye before heading back."
"He's going already?" I was shocked. The conversation of his need to return to straighten out some issues had only happened last night. I had envisioned him leaving next week, not today.
"He had prolonged his visit just for you, Steele." Kate pointed out.
"Oh." How long had he planned to stay?
"I would wonder how he will get pass the paparazzi downstairs. He's already been classified as your lover."
"How bad is it?" I asked, jumping to my feet and rushing to the window and peeking down. It was difficult to make out from such a height, but I could see a crowd outside Escala, no doubt awaiting oil to fan their flames.
There was a knock on the door. I half-turned expecting to see Ethan step in, but the man causing all this problem let himself in.
Kate took on a defensive stance, "What is it, Grey?"
He put both hands in the air. "I felt it necessary to defend myself."
Clearly, he had been listening and watching. Inwardly, I groaned. Kate shook her head at him, "No need, Ana doesn't need you to distract her further."
I nodded in agreement.
Christian looked at me, as if trying to decide if he should step in. "Do we need Flynn again?" He directed the question to me.
I shook my head. "You", I pointed at him, "need Flynn."
Christian crossed his arms. "Does that mean you've decided not to work things through between us?" By the way he said it, I knew if I have him a positive, I would be in huge trouble.
"Nothing of that sort," I waved his accusation away. "I believe Kate when she says that no matter what excuse you gave, you still did cheat on me with Leila."
Kate took on Christian's stance against him, tapping her foot in agreement to my words, as if challenging him to counter her point.
Christian's eyes filled with sorrow, "I'm sorry, Ana." Then he looked at a fuming Kate. "I really am sorry."
"Sorry, sorry." Kate repeated his words. "If that's all it takes to mend a broken trust... " She turns to me, "Ana should have sex with half of Seattle and then say sorry."
Christian hissed at the idea and very subtly shook his head at me, indicating that I should not learn from Kate's bad advise. But I did see a sense in what Kate was saying. I was indeed letting Christian off too easily.
It was time to take my revenge up a notch. "I very much agree, Kate."
It took the both of them by surprise and I could not help but crack a smile. "Come on, Kate. Line them up!" I clapped my hands with excitement.
Kate arched her eyebrows at me in question and I beamed, sending her a signal that I was not being serious. Quickly, she picked up on it. "Yes yes, certainly."
"That's absurd." Christian bickered, anger rushing through his system. "Ana only needs me."
There was movement behind Christian. Kate noticed it too and smirked, "Ana? Need you? You? Don't flatter yourself. I'll tell you what she really needs."
Christian beckoned her to go on, narrowing his eyes.
"Ana needs Ethan." At the sound of his voice, Ethan stepped out from behind Christian and into the room.
"Kate, Ana," He smiled ever so sweetly. He was dressed in jeans and a collared polo. Pretty much reluctantly, he grumbled a greeting to Christian and then strode towards us.
I had never seen Christian so irritated in his whole entire life. "How the hell did you slip past my security?" Christian blanched, taking a step forward to confront Ethan.
Ethan winked at me, "Ms Steele is the key to everything."
What? He had used my name? How did that help him this time?
"Sup, bra." Kate gave him a hi-five as he reached her, which Ethan complimented with a kiss on her cheek.
"Did you speak with the paparazzi?" Christian sounded uptight, uncomfortable.
Ethan shrugged in response and gave me a grin, "Hello, Ana."
I flushed. "Hi, Ethan."
"You left me in bed this morning, now that's unforgivable." Ethan scolded. "I had to deal with a very haughty Steve this afternoon. I barely escaped with my life."
I laughed at the hyperbole. "What did Steve have against you?"
"Not me, Mr Christian Grey over there destructed his beauty rest."
We both turned to Christian and Ethan shuddered playfully. Christian was still glaring at him through narrowed eyes. "No, I have yet to speak to those reporters." Ethan reassured Christian and he relaxed.
"We'll need you to sign an NDA." Christian stated formally.
"I have no intention to." Ethan rolled his eyes.
I giggled. Mr Christian Grey would not approve of eye rolling. "Giggling so quickly, my sweet Ana?" I giggled some more as Ethan tried to tickle me.
"Hey, where's Jose?" Kate asked.
"Jose?" Christian and I both piped up in unison. Jose?
Ethan pursed his lips. "He's outside talking to Elliott."
"What's Jose doing here?" I questioned, pushing aside Ethan's wandering hands.
Ethan eventually surrendered, taking a seat on none other than my lap. Christian's eyes blazed at the scene. Surely Ethan was doing this on purpose. The bed was about thirty times the size of my lap and he could have sat anywhere.
Kate waved my worries away. " You stopped talking to him, Ana. He panicked. Hence, I asked Ethan to pick him up on the way over."
Surely the Kavanaghs had only intended to give Christian a panic attack. Christian fancied neither Ethan nor Jose, I knew that all too well. But she was right in doing so, I had neglected poor Jose for much too long in respect to my dealing with all this drama.
"I lost my phone!" I argued from behind Ethan, unable to see much as he playfully leaned back into me. "You're so heavy, Ethan!"
In one swift movement, Ethan slid off me and pulled me onto his lap, reversing the position. "Tadah!" He cheered, expecting cheers for his magic trick. I smacked him but otherwise sat comfortably. Christian on the other hand was on opposite opinions with me.
"Ana, poor Jose's been worried sick. Not to mention, your parents have called either of us a million times. I did tell them that Christian was not the man they both thought he was and that you were otherwise occupied with Ethan."
Christian was not too happy. His reputation with my family members had been tarnished all thanks to Kate. But I failed to see how he would think I would not have spoiled it myself, their good impression of him would have vanished with the first sentence I would utter to them.
"Kate, I really wished that I could be the one to tell them." I groaned and Ethan wrapped his arms around my stomach much to Christian's annoyance.
"It should have been my duty, Ms Kavanagh." Christian growled. "I made the mistake and I should've been the one to confess."
"No need, man." Ethan mumbled from behind me. "Consider your name out of their good books forever. You're cut from their family tree. Sayonara. Adieu."
"Shut the f*** up, Mr Kavanagh."
"Watch it, Grey." Kate spat.
Tension in the room was once again reaching its peak. The joint forces of the Kavanaghs were going to push Christian off the edge. I, on the other hand, sat here like a bystander rather than a key actor in this production. I was thoroughly grateful for it, because without either of them, I was often left confused and widely persuaded by Christian to forget his sins.
"You invited Ethan and Jose to my house without my permission." Christian pointed out. "And not to mention, let yourself and Ethan in too. Without my permission."
Kate took up the rival immediately, sizing him up. "And you cheated on my best friend."
"She's right." Ethan backed her up after a resounding 'uh-huh' on his part.
Christian looked very cross indeed. He clenched his teeth and balled up his fists as he stared down at Kate. "I understand that I have made a mistake, but how long will I have to keep paying for it?"
Repeating the words she had preached into me earlier, she went on her tiptoes. "Until the day she feels no pain when she thinks of you cheating."
"That's. Impossible." He said each word slowly and loudly.
"I'm glad you know it." Kate crossed her arms tightly once again. "I think you should concede and let Jose and Ethan battle for her hand."
I watched him get taken by surprise once again. "You know?" He asked her quietly and then looked at me. "You told?"
Ethan's palm flew up to my eyes and covered them, shielding me from the overwhelming grey gaze that would have broken me down. Christian grumbled angrily, knowing that he would not be able to get past Kate and to me without it turning messier.
"We all know you're widely insincere, trying to tie Ana down to you before she can run off with someone better than you. Which I can't deny would be easy to find because anybody would be more faithful to her than you." Kate went on.
It was difficult to imagine the looks on their faces with Ethan's hand around my eyes so securely. There was only the redness that was the result of the sunlight against his palm.
"I was sincere, I was. I intend to marry Ana."
"That makes one of you."
"Miss Kavanagh, I don't expect Ana to accept immediately given my recent crime. But I do expect her to think it through and realize that I genuinely love her and want to make her my forever."
Then, I was glad that Ethan was still covering my eyes, for I was not ready for Christian to look me directly in my eyes and repeat his words. I would have crumbled at his feet and agreed to be his forever, for those were very sweet words indeed. But there was the pressing matter of his infidelity that I could not simply brush off as nothing, it was certainly too difficult for me to believe there was any speck of truth in his words.
Inspired By: If You Ever Come Back, The Script.
Grace, Tenth Avenue North
Everything has changed, Taylor Swift
How Love Wins, Steven Chapman