17-09-2008, Kansas City Hospital
It's been midnight and John, Mary and Castiel are still waiting.
Sam also came to the hospital as quick as possible. He also asks what happened and he gets the same answer as Castiel did.
They wait for another four hours and Castiel falls asleep. So do Mary and Sam.
John is the only one awake, so when Julia finally is in the waiting room, John wakes everyone up.
Julia looks down at the floor. Her face is red and you can see that she has cried. She looks at the family, they're all worried.
Then she looks at Castiel, he looks sad, worried and afraid.
"Ehm," Julia says, she doesn't know how to say what she's going to say. "What I'm going to say is going to be very hard for you as Dean's family… and friend," Julia begins. "But I'm afraid we can't help Dean anymore."
Mary lets her head fall in her hands and she starts to cry.
Castiel looks at the floor, trying not to cry. He knows exactly what this means.
Julia looks also at the floor. "Dean has blood in his lungs, we don't know how. He's awake and he's still alive, because we pumped away the blood and got him something to help him breath. But I'm afraid I need to say that this will last for only three to four hours."
Mary keeps crying and Castiel stands up, ready to walk away if he needs to.
Julia looks at Castiel and then at Sam who's also crying just like Mary.
"I think you should use those hours to say goodbye, because we can't do more than this. When his lungs fill again, he'll…"
Castiel runs away, sobbing. Julia follows Castiel with her eyes.
"Die."
Everyone of Dean's family starts to cry and they hug each other.
Julia brings them to the room where Dean is.
When Dean sees his parents he begins to cry.
Julia decides to leave them alone.
Castiel is on the toiletseat and he's wiping his nose with some toilet paper.
Why Dean!?
He asks himself and he opens the door.
When looks at the clock in the hallway he realizes that he has been in the bathroom for two and a half hour.
Castiel begins to cry again and he wants to see Dean again, but he can't.
He's no family.
Castiel takes a seat on the floor and lets his head fall in his hands.
He looks up when he hears the voice of a young man.
"Dean would like to say goodbye to you too."
Castiel looks at the man, who appears to be Sam.
Castiel nods. "I would like that too," Castiel says and he sniffles.
Sam helps him up and they walk towards Dean's room.
When Castiel walks in, he sees Dean. Dean has tubes in his nose and he looks weak.
"Hi, Cas."
His voice sounds hoarse and shaky.
Castiel smiles sadly and takes a seat on a chair next to Dean's bed.
"Hi, Dean," he replies and looks at the nearly dead Dean.
"Well, you're here to say goodbye. So goodbye," Dean laughs, sadly.
Castiel smiles back and a tear falls down over his cheek.
"Is it so easy to say goodbye?"
Castiel's voice breaks a little.
Dean shakes his head. "Not really, but I'm not into speeches."
Castiel giggles and more tears run over his cheeks.
Dean starts coughing, hard.
Really hard.
Too hard.
"Dean?" Castiel starts to panic a little. "I'm gonna get a doctor!"
Dean shakes his head while coughing.
"No, don't Cas," Dean says between the coughs. "I… don't want to spend… my last moment with them…"
Dean keeps coughing and blood drips from his mouth.
Castiel hesitates, but walks back to the bed. He looks at Mary, John and Sam who are hugging each other and crying.
Dean starts hyperventilating and stops coughing.
"Cas, take… it." Dean holds his hand in front of Castiel. Castiel puts his hand under Dean's hand and Dean drops a necklace in Castiel's hand.
"I…"
Dean coughs.
"love you, Cas."
Tears start to run over Castiel's cheeks. "I…"
Castiel gets interrupted by the sound of the heart monitor. It makes one toned beeping noise.
Castiel lays his hand on Dean's shoulder and he feels how Dean weakens and falls back.
Castiel starts crying and he hears the noises of Dean's family crying.
"Love you too."
Castiel shakes his head and starts to shake. Tears stream over his cheeks.
"I love you, Dean! I love you!" he cries.
Then he hears yelling of doctors.
He gets pulled back, but he doesn't let go of Dean's shoulder.
"No! I love him!" he cries and he gets pulled away by a doctor. "Why! No, no, NO!"
Castiel sits in a room, together with Mary, John and Sam.
They all got a cup with hot coco milk.
Castiel looks in his cup and brings it to his mouth.
Julia is in the room too, she looks at Castiel.
"Why didn't you call us over, Castiel?"
Castiel looks at Julia and he blinks.
"He wanted me to stay," Castiel whispers.
Julia looks a little angry at Castiel.
"But he also wanted to live, right?" she yells at Castiel. "Now you just let him die!"
Castiel gets that Julia is angry, but this he can't take.
"He wanted me to stay! And I loved him so I stayed!"
Castiel stands up drops his coco milk on the floor and runs away.
He leaves, he goes home.
Same day, Castiel's house
Castiel sits on the bench at his home with his laptop on his lap.
He still has the necklace in his hand. He looks at the charm that Dean gave him.
It's a charm you can open, he realizes.
He opens the charm and he sees a photo of him and Dean.
It's the picture from Dean's "last day" at the hospital.
Castiel smiles at the picture and a tear drops on his lap.
In the charm also sat a letter.
It's folded really small and Castiel unfolds it.
Hi Cas,
It's me Dean, but I think I'm also the one who gave this to you… or I hope so.
I had a real nice time at the hospital, but it wasn't because of my wounds. Believe me!
It was because of you.
Yeah, I know… pretty gay, right?
But maybe I am gay, but gay is okay.
I don't know if you feel the same, but I don't think I like girls.
I don't like boys either… I'm in love with one single boy.
It's you Cas… I'm just gonna say it: I'm in love with the cutest, boy, assistant of Kansas' best hospital. Sounds weird, right? But it's true.
Cas, I like love you.
And, no, I'm not Cheyenne, but this is a love letter and I really do love you.
I hope you feel the same for me…
Love Dean W.
Castiel smiles and he starts sobbing again.
"Yes, Dean, I love you," he whispers while looking at the picture.
He folds the letter back up and puts it back in the charm.
He puts the necklace around his neck. Castiel knows he's never going to see Dean again, but he still feels Dean's presence.
Castiel smiles sadly and folds his hand around the charm.
"I love you."