Chapter Seventeen: Drowning Girl
I would like to thank all of you so much for the continuous support while I have been on hiatus. I really appreciate all of it. What's new with me since you guys saw me last? What's it been two years? I've grown up some so if there seems to be any change in my writing style please just apply the age change. What has started out as a mild ending is going to become something much more mature. I am pleased to report that we have about five or six more chapters depending on how I fill them up, then there will be a short (not two more years I promise!) break and we will resume with part two of the (Will Insert In Book Two) chronicles. Sorry, it's a major spoiler. I'm in college now but I will do my best to update at least once a month. Now then, I've monopolized this story enough. However before I begin I would like to once again thank all my loyal followers old and new. Shout out to Fantasy Writer, Lilly Moonlight, Cutie Bunny. You've been here since the start
Poetry is an echo, asking a shadow to dance - Carl Sandburg
Castel Monastero was a paradise for Helen. A break from the previous drama and stress of being confined to the magnificent but haunting city of Volterra. Here she was free to spend time with Sulpicia and not have to worry about spiteful guard members or Aro's stupid and misguided temper. She spent the remaining days of her vacation doing yoga, getting massages and trying different kinds of fine Italian wine. She even managed to get a little tipsy one night and had a little trouble walking back from the restaurant in the dark, but thanks to her sorta mother and large glass of water that night, she got back alright.
However, her relaxing was only temporary, as her and Sulpicia would be leaving for Castel Monastero the following day. Driving back in the vampiress' porsche made her nervous. She didn't want to have to deal with seeing Aro or any repercussions from the guard after her dalliance with Alec.
"Helen," Sulpicia chimed in from the driver's seat. Her crimson eyes never leaving the road, "I would like to ask you something."
"What's up?" Helen responded, perking up from her headphones and taking her propped up foot down from the dashboard. Splice sighed before speaking, "Aro mentioned to me that some of the members of the guard have not been treating you very respectfully, is this correct?"
"Um..." Helen began to reply, not sure if she should open up about what has been going on at the hands of Miranda.
"'Um' is not an answer, dear." Sulpicia responded, "now explain to me exactly what has been happening."
"Well, it's really just from this chick named Miranda. I don't know what her problem is, I think she's got a crush on your husband or something and before I came along she was a favorite of his." Helen explained, "I really don't want this to turn into anything bigger, I can take care of myself."
"Little bird, she is thousands of times stronger than you and can split your skull in two without breaking a nail. I know exactly with whom you're referring to and I plan on having a talk with Aro about what needs to remedied with her."
"Please," Helen responded with sad eyes. "I don't want you guys to fight anymore."
"Don't worry, Helen." Sulpicia shook her head, "nothing is wrong. But, if Miranda approaches you again I need you to come and tell me, because I am not taking any more chances with guard members or werewolves. I want you to be happy with us."
Helen felt like she should respond with 'but I am happy here' or something, but the truth of it was that she still had a hard time finding joy in the ancient city or with her forcible parents. Instead, she chimed in with another question, "what does Leccapiedi mean?"
"Boot licker." Sulpicia said with a huff.
When Helen returned to the magnificent staircase leading up to her room, she noticed from a distance that a few guard members were staring at her with wonder, wondering why she felt so calm to walk around the castle so freely. When she got to the top of the staircase, she was pleased to see Renata almost waiting for her.
"You haven't seen Jane have you?" Renata asked nervously. Oh god, Jane. She had completely forgotten about what they had spoken about before she had gone off and started making out with Alec. Damn, she must be pissed for her brother getting in trouble, even if it wasn't entirely Helen's fault.
"How mad is she?" Helen asked with a groan.
"Well I've seen worse." Renata replied, running a hand through her strawberry blonde tresses. "I wouldn't go in the library or recreation center until later this evening when Jane has patrol to fetch Master Aro from the airport."
"Okay, well, thanks for the warning." Helen shrugged and began to walk towards her room, however, she paused and turned towards the female vampire. "Hey, Renata."
"Yes?" She replied.
"Do you wanna hang out right now?" Helen offered.
"Hang out?" Renata questioned with a confused look.
"Oh c'mon, you know! We watch movies or braid each other's hair and talk about boys." Helen explained awkwardly, "hang out."
"Helen I am old enough to be your grandmother's grandmother's great grandmother." Renata chuckled, "I do not do any of that stuff."
"I used to hang with my Grandma." Helen protested, "...back when she was still alive."
"Helen." Renata snorted.
"Just for an hour?" Helen asked, "just one."
"Fine, one hour." Renata began to follow her down the hallway, they stopped just before Helen's room and noticed sloppy writing on her door, in a heavy permanent marker: Human trash.
"Well, this is my room," Helen stated awkwardly. Renata made no response and followed Helen into her luxurious suite. The hotel room in Castel Monastero had reminded her very much of her old room back in St. Louis, while this room continued to feel very hotel and ritzy to her.
"It's very nice," Renata replied with a smile. "Lady Sulpicia has excellent taste, but Master knew your favorite colors before he had it redecorated."
"Did this room belong to anyone before me?" Helen wondered out loud. Renata simply shook her head in response, "no. But Master does have guest rooms when he decides to entertain company."
Renata floated over to the bronze colored couch and seemed to shift between prompting Helen with a question or taking a seat, "shall we sit down?"
"Oh! Yeah, of course." Helen blushed and then made her way over to the couch as well. No one said a word for awhile and focused on which position to cross their ankles or tuck their hair behind their ears.
"So what music do you listen to?" Helen prompted.
"I am a fan of Schubert, Tchaikovsky, Vivaldi and Bach." She replied, "I tend to mix different eras together, but I am a fool for the Baroque period. What about you?"
"Um, well I know Tchaikovsky because of ballet. I don't really know any other composers than that." Helen expressed with embarrassment, "I like Imagine Dragons, 21 Pilots, have you heard of Maroon 5?"
"Can't say that I have," Renata muttered. "Time tends to get lost in these walls. I could have sworn just yesterday I was selling bread in Malta with my uncle." She smiled as what appeared to be a fond memory and Helen realized exactly how out of time she was compared to Renata and other members of the Volturi guard.
"What's the coolest time period you've lived in?"
Renata seemed taken aback by such a question, almost flattered that Helen would ask her something like that. "I enjoyed The Edwardian Era very much. It was a wonderful time for fashion and the first time I ever got to drive a car. Of course back then cars were much more difficult to acquire."
"I love old cars." Helen smiled, "how old were you? You know, when you were changed."
"Sixteen."
"What's it like?" She asked, her curiosity getting the better of her. In her time both in and out of Volterra, Helen had witnessed several accounts of vampirism but she had never given much thought about what it was like to be one or what the process of becoming one was like.
"You're asking me what it is like to be an immortal? Surely the Master can answer any questions you may have?" Renata responded.
"Look, if I ask either of those two about being a vampire or what it's like to be changed they will start popping open bottles of blood or cider or whatever, because they'd think it was me giving them the okay to change me and I'm not ready for that, yet." Helen explained, "I need a third party's opinion."
"Alright." Renata inhaled, "I won't lie to you. The change is agony, complete pain and suffering. This is because the body has to completely re-engineer itself once the venom starts to flow into the bloodstream. It completely modifies genetics, because you essentially change into an entirely different species. It feels as though a great fire has consumed your entire being and you cannot do anything about it. You must simply wait until the transformation is complete, assuming your body doesn't reject the venom."
"What do you mean?"
"There have been cases when those whom have been injected with venom, either intentionally or accidentally, do not survive the change. There's no real explanation for it, it is such a traumatic experience for anyone to undergo, the body just simply cannot handle it. Since the venom is rejected, it starts working against the body and eventually stops the heart before the vampire body can sustain itself. About 100 years ago, there was a seer that came into contact with the Volturi. He was a young man, around your age. When Master Aro discovered him, he immediately knew that everything would be done to get him to join the guard. He didn't have any family or dear ones in the human world, so he agreed to become one of us."
"He didn't make it." Helen finished.
"I've never seen my Master so devastated before. He saw every single possibility of him in the guard and utilizing his potential just slip away from his fingers. He did everything he could to save him, even sent a telegraph to Carlisle Cullen, begging for an absolution."
"That's so sad," Helen frowned. "Is that why he wants a seer so badly now?"
"It's definitely a factor." Renata replied, checking her nails, "but when the transformation is completed, it is unlike anything you will ever experience. You will become faster, fast a striking wind. Your eyesight is something you never dreamed of being able to posses, you can hear and smell heartbeats, blood, nature, life from hundreds of miles away. Atlas himself marvels at your strength. Any bodily imperfections you possessed before will disappear. A vampire body is much like a venus fly trap; we lure our prey closer, everything about us invites them in. Our voice, our smell, our appearence; it's all designed to help us survive."
"But you kill other people!" Helen protested.
"Humans kill animals for their meat and other resources," Renata snapped back. "Lumber and oil companies destroy resources and lifeforms while they drill and deforest our Earth. There are humans that kill other humans for sport, that kill animals for sport. When we kill humans, we kill for thirst and sustainment, to preserve ourselves."
"You don't hear animals and trees beg for their lives, for their children's lives."
"Oh, you sound just like Carlisle and his family." She rolled her eyes, "is it sad that humans have to die? Yes, but it is a necessary evil. Then Carlisle goes around on his high horse acting like he and his family are saints for drinking animal blood. There are no dietary benefits from that; it weakens everything about you. If all vampires lived off of animals we would draw attention to ourselves, we'd have to feed off of cattle and other herds."
"So what, they're like vegetarian vampires?"
"They are not real vampires." Renata corrected.
"Okay." Helen answered, "I'll be right back I need to use the bathroom."
She splashed a lot of cold water on her face. Helen couldn't even fathom how much that was to take in. She had no idea what she was getting into when she asked Renata about immortality, hell, she had no idea what she was getting into three months ago. Maybe she should have waited and asked Aro or Sulpicia instead? No, they'd get too excited and tell her way too much or sugarcoat the entire thing so she'd agree.
She couldn't help it, she knew so little about everything in the grand scheme of things. There needed to be some information she could go off of. Helen hated constantly being put in a position around these vampires and knowing absolutely nothing about any of them. She felt like a complete idiot half the time.
While Helen was not entirely set on becoming an immortal, she had to admit, sometimes they were really freaking cool. But, as soon as she'd think that, there's the feeling of complete guilt that consumes her and reminds her that Richard and the others were back home, devastated and desperate to know where she was. Meanwhile she's in Volterra and trying to find ways to make herself comfortable or escape or adjust. She didn't even know how she felt about anything here! Shit, she didn't even know how she felt about Aro and Sulpicia! Did she like them? Did she care for them? Was this some creepy oracle bond thing?
'Uhhhhhh! This is all giving me one giant headache!'
She was brought out of her thoughts by a sharp knock on her bathroom door. "Helen?" Renata's melodic voice was heard from the other side, "are you alright?" Helen quickly grabbed a washcloth and dried her face off.
"Yeah, I'm good!"
'Liar', she told herself.
"Very well. I'm afraid I must get going, Master Aro's flight is landing earlier than expected." Helen threw the towel to the side and scurried over to the door where Renata was waiting.
"Alright." Helen replied after opening the door, "well thanks for hanging out."
"We'll definitely need to do this again," Renata smiled and flipped her strawberry blonde waves as she walked out of the door, gradually increasing the speed in her step, causing a streak in the air.
'If for some reason I should become a vampire, I am totally doing that all the time.'
Helen hung around her room for the next few hours, she had thought about going off and looking for Alec, but ultimately decided against it. She sort of went into a stir crazy frenzy in her closet. After being out in the open in Castel Monastero for the past couple of days, she had gotten used to being outside and in a much smaller space. Helen tried on a bunch of different outfits, starting with a nice pair of expensive jeans and a soft cashmere sweater, to casual dresses, to cocktail dresses, to her fancy ball gowns before finally discovering some dance and exercise clothing in the back of her closet. A simple leotard under blue jazz pants, she was going to relish in the high quality pointe shoes that Aro and Sulpicia had bought her.
She grabbed the silkiest looking pair out of the pile and her eyes stopped on a very long dress cover hanging up in the back. There wasn't any identification tag like the rest of her closet. Being as short as she was, Helen grabbed the clothes rod and pulled it down from the rack. As soon as she started unzipping it, there was a distinct note of feathers being heard behind her.
"That's your cloak," Aro stated, making Helen jump and feeling her heart almost burst from her chest. He literally could've come back her and murdered her and she would not have heard him.
"Geez!" Helen shouted, "you gave me a heart attack!"
"I did not hear you go into cardiac arrest, I assure you." He replied with a lazy expression, fixing his suit jacket and tie. "I see you've made a rather large mess in here."
"I'm going to clean it up," Helen snorted.
"I know you will, even though you don't have to." He gave her a small smile, "I missed you while we were apart."
Helen rolled her eyes with a dry grin on her face, putting the cloak back up on the clothes rack. "Really?" She replied snarkily, "because the last time I saw you the exchange wasn't exactly anything to get nostalgic over."
"Helen, I need you to listen to me." He gritted through his teeth.
"I'm not going to apologize for it." She crossed her arms, "I'm fifteen years old, I like boys, it's not like anything happened. I wish you'd just cut me some slack for once. God knows I have tried to be everything for you-
"You have not tried at all!" Aro spat at her, his voice dripping with venom. "Do not even pretend that you have tried at being apart of our family in the least. We have to twist your arm and bend over backwards just to get you to even consider being happy. My wife and I have told you countless times that we love you and want you here and all that goes through your thick little skull is how to leave. You have not tried, you have not let your guard down with us. There was time, only a few short weeks ago, when you would confide in me. When you would let me comfort you and take care of you, that's the Helen I wanted to bring back with me."
"Oh, so I haven't measured up to your unrealistic expectations?" Helen snapped back. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but there was a time, a few short weeks ago if I'm correct, when I wanted to confide in you! I looked forward to seeing you at the Academy! I was drawn to you and I enjoyed spending time with you and I didn't know why!"
"That's the bond, my love." He beamed and traced her cheek with his fingertips, "I want you to remember that feeling and how good it felt to let yourself go when you're around us. That's why we're all here, the three of us are meant to be a family."
"No." Helen objected and moved away from his touch, "I didn't know why until today. Until I spoke with Renata and I figured out why. It's because you're a vampire."
"What?" Aro wondered. He noticed hot tears coming from the corners of Helen's eyes and almost instinctively wiped them away.
"You have the ability to draw me in, to make me feel consumed and enamored with you. It's what you do, it's how you get what you want." Helen started wiping her own tears away, "how I am supposed to know if this is real?"
"Helen." He said softly, and pulled her in for a hug. Running his fingers through her ginger curls while she let out silent sobs, rubbing her back in comfort. All she wanted to do right now was go to do basic pointework, to finally vent out all of her frustrations. To forget about all the bullshit that existed around her, to be free of this wretched castle and stop having to sacrifice everything.
"I love you, Mia Stella." Aro breathed into her hair, "everything is going to be okay. I need you to try for me, or I'm afraid you won't be happy here. I'm going to take care of you, just be honest with yourself about your feelings for me and the rest will take care of itself."
He pulled her out of the embrace and held her by her wrists, making straight eye contact with her. She was trembling about what him and his temper were going to do next.
"Tell me that you love me." Aro said sweetly, hoping to get a response out of her.
"Stop it!" Helen cried out, "I do not want to get into this with you anymore! I don't want to fight with you anymore!"
"Then give me something to take away from this! Meet me halfway, damn you!" Aro shouted back at her, "why won't you say that you love me?!" He shook Helen and gripped her wrists tighter, "what, you'll say it to him, but heaven forbid you say it to me?"
"I want to mean it when I say it." Helen explained, "That's it, that's all. I don't want to force it or anything else." Helen trembled for a few minutes while Aro just stared at her, disappointed and unhappy. Waiting for her to give him anything to continue from, "I know you want the real thing. I want to say those words to you and not have to second guess myself, to not feel guilty about loving you. You just have to give me a little more time."
"You've had plenty of time," he whispered darkly. "Perhaps Richard Hendricks' life is a distraction for you, hmm?"
"Aro, you can pull that ace out all you want, I will do anything you ask of me if you do, I will tell you sweet things even if they are not true." Helen said defeatedly. "And I haven't the slightest clue why, but I care for you very much and I am struggling with everything right now." He finally let go of her wrists, but continued to hold the glare on his face.
"I want to love you," she confessed. "But I need you to meet me halfway too."
He didn't say anything to her for a good while, his mind thinking of all the different possibilities he could take from this. Helen knew she had badly wounded his pride and she did not want to have him storm out after an argument like a few days ago. Hell, she didn't even want to have an argument with him anymore.
But they needed to hash things out, before bitterness set it.
Instead of shouting, Aro reached into his pocket and pulled out a simple brass key, placing it her hand. "I just received word that the renovations were done, I wanted everything to be perfect for you before you could continue. I don't want to see you hurt or in pain, I am a very jealous man and I hate sharing you. I have to know, my dear, I have to know if you could see me as your father, if you could see me as you do him."
"I could." Helen stated with a small smile.
"Thank you." He nodded, before fixing his suit jacket once more and turning to leave, he paused for a moment and turned his head ever so slightly, "who wrote that awful thing on your door?"
"I have no idea." Helen admitted, "Miranda maybe?"
"I see." Aro replied dangerously, "very well then. I might stop by again later after you've done your work."
Reviews are appreciated as always my loves!