Title: She's My Wife (Secret Santa Fic for pensco_927)
Author:captstarbuck
Beta/Editor:Stacy d'Lacy (best beta on the planet)
Pairing: Callie/Arizona
Rating: T
Secret Santa Prompt: Callie and Arizona have reunited, but are dating slowly (still living apart while they get to know who they are now), and no one knows. What happens to their relationship when their friends at the hospital decide to get involved to make them move on with their lives? Rating: Author's preference
Disclaimers: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
Chapter 2
It had taken some doing on both their parts, but Callie and Arizona were able to work out a schedule that allowed them to share a dinner once a week with Sofia. They found it easier to have dinner together at the house than to have it at Alex's house. Callie was grateful that Arizona had agreed to it. She could only imagine how hard it was for the blonde to come to the place that was once her home, and Callie made it clear on more than one occasion how much she appreciated it.
Even with their tight schedules they also made time to spend a day once a week together with Sofia. One Saturday when the weather was nice (a Seattle rarity in January), they made a trip to the Woodland Park Zoo. The next week they took Sofia to the Children's Museum. Another rainy Saturday they spent building a fort out of blankets, followed by a tea party with Sofia's favorite stuffed animals. Sofia still couldn't understand exactly why her Mama always left, but she thrived on getting attention from both her mothers.
Callie found herself looking forward to the time with Arizona as well, especially their weekly dinners. After putting Sofia to bed, the two women often relaxed in the living room with a glass of wine before Arizona returned to Alex's house. It had been a little awkward at first, and they mostly talked about Sofia and their upcoming plans for their weekend day with their daughter. With each dinner, however, Arizona began staying later.
As the weeks progressed, their conversations became easier, more comfortable. Arizona talked about her work, sharing her pride in her successes. Callie enjoyed hearing and seeing the confident Arizona again. At least one good thing had come out of their split; Arizona was once more hitting her stride professionally. The blonde had also become more open about sharing the cases where the outcomes hadn't been so good. That was another change. In the past, Arizona wouldn't discuss them with anyone, preferring to just soldier on in silence.
With everything that had happened with them over the past few years, Callie had forgotten how much she'd simply enjoyed Arizona's company. So much of their lives had revolved around one crisis after the next, they'd let "them" disappear.
As she rinsed out the wine glasses after Arizona had left one night in late January, Callie finally realized that she missed Arizona more than she thought she would or ever could again. The house was too empty, too quiet when the blonde left. She remembered Arizona asking her once if she missed the blonde, and Callie had truthfully answered that of course she did. When Arizona had followed that up with a 'but not enough' Callie had remained silent. She wasn't ready to admit that there were times she missed Arizona so much it almost physically hurt. With time, the ache lessened and Callie was sure she was over the blonde.
The time spent with Arizona the past few weeks, however, had brought the familiar yearnings to be with the blonde again. She felt like she'd been given a glimpse into how it should've been for them, and how, maybe, it could be. She'd never stopped loving Arizona, never questioned her love for the blonde, but now she felt like she was falling in love with Arizona all over again. She was scared of how strongly she still felt for the woman who had broken her heart more than once, and she also feared that Arizona didn't feel the same way.
Choking back a sudden sob, Callie set the wineglass down. She didn't want to just be friends who co-parented their daughter. She wanted Arizona back in her life as more than that, but she was also afraid it was too late. She needed Arizona in her life, but she wasn't so sure she was ready to risk their newly found, somewhat fragile friendship.
Deciding another glass of wine was a bad idea, Callie filled a glass with water and returned to the living room. She needed a way to figure out if Arizona felt the same way. There were times Callie had caught the blonde staring at her with what appeared to be longing, but the Latina wasn't sure. She thought maybe she was reading more into it, seeing what she wanted to see. Sighing heavily, she got up from the couch. She checked on Sofia one last time before retiring to bed.
Arizona stood beside her mentor as they scrubbed out from a long but successful surgery.
"Nice job, Robbins," Dr. Herman said.
The blonde nodded, knowing that there was more to come than just a compliment.
"It looks like you've finally learned something," the older woman continued.
Arizona bit her lip and kept quiet.
"Go home, Robbins," Dr. Herman ordered. "You look like hell," she added as she left the room, on her way to speak to the patient's family.
The words may have been abrupt, but Arizona knew that it was tantamount to Nicole saying she was concerned. Arizona slowly exhaled, not even realizing she'd been holding her breath while she waited for the older woman to leave.
She finished scrubbing out and then leaned against the sink. She was beyond tired, and not just from the surgery. Being stressed out was more than exhausting. She'd screwed up; not monumentally 'I cheated on my wife' screwed up, but it was bad. And between worrying about what she'd done and avoiding Callie for the past week, she was just plain wiped out.
Pulling off her scrub cap, she exited the room. She quickly glanced both ways, relieved that she didn't see Callie. She just didn't know what she'd do if she saw the Latina, and she didn't know what excuse she could use to avoid their weekly dinner with Sofia. An emergency surgery had given her an out for missing her 'family' day with Sofia, but with Herman telling her to go home, she had no reason to miss dinner.
As she headed for the locker room, the blonde once again thought about what she'd done a week earlier. She'd had a great time with Sofia and Callie at their weekly dinner, and she and Callie had talked for several hours after Sofia had gone to bed. It had been nice, very nice, comfortable and easy even, until she'd gotten up to leave. Callie had walked her to the door and after Arizona had opened the door, she'd instinctively, almost routinely, placed a kiss on Callie's cheek. The action had seemed so natural. When she'd realized what she'd done, Arizona had quickly stumbled away, ignoring the quiet "Arizona" that had fallen from Callie's lips.
Stupid, stupid, stupid, Arizona silently berated herself as she entered the locker room. Just when we were finally getting along I had to do something like that. She sank down onto the bench in front of her locker and put her head into her hands. Sooner or later she was going to have to face Callie and probably do a massive amount of groveling and apologizing. Of course, to do that, she had to stop avoiding Callie, but the blonde just didn't know if she could face the Latina's ire, and she just knew Callie had to be angry. Why wouldn't she be angry? Callie's gone out of her way to set up these family moments and I had to blow it by kissing her.
As if kissing Callie hadn't complicated things enough, the realization that she was still in love with her wife put her over the edge. She knew deep down that she'd always love Callie. How could she stop after loving the woman for years? But the blonde had done such a good job of suppressing her true feelings that she'd started to believe that she was no longer in love with the Latina.
Callie might forgive me for the kiss, but there's no way I can hide how I feel. She'll know. Arizona rubbed her temples. I'm just going to have to stop these dinners and family days with Sofia until I can get a better handle on my feelings.
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Callie knew Arizona had been avoiding her and Callie let it go at first. She knew the blonde was 'processing'; it was what Arizona did. For Callie, it was hard to know when the processing would cross over into freaking out. She was sure she'd waited too long, though, as she was certain Arizona had moved into that stage. The last time she'd seen Arizona was when Arizona had brought Sofia home two days ago. The blonde had looked stressed out and she'd left immediately with some excuse about needing to get back to the hospital. Callie had let it slide at the time, but now she needed to talk to Arizona.
The Ortho surgeon knew exactly why Arizona was freaking out and Callie was surprised that she, herself, was not. She'd been stunned when Arizona had kissed her. Granted, the kiss had only been a light peck on the cheek but Callie had been shocked into temporary silence. It wasn't until Arizona was nearly out the door when she'd managed to utter the blonde's name. Callie wanted to go after her, but by the time she could get her feet to move, Arizona was in her car and driving away.
That brief contact of Arizona's lips on her cheek and the spark she felt inside only confirmed what Callie knew deep down; she was in love with Arizona, and probably would be forever. A separation from the blonde that Callie had demanded had done nothing to diminish her feelings.
As Callie approached the surgical board, she saw one of the nurses erasing Arizona's surgery with Herman.
"Is Dr. Robbins out of surgery?" Callie asked, needing to confirm her suspicions.
"Yes. Dr. Robbins and Dr. Herman finished about twenty minutes ago."
Nodding her thanks, Callie quickly scanned the rest of the board. Arizona had no more surgeries scheduled. She paused for a moment then decided that Arizona was probably in the locker room. In an attempt to quell the nervousness she felt, Callie deliberately slowed her stride as she made her way to the locker room.
The Latina took a deep breath before swinging the door open. She felt a sudden pang in her chest when she saw the clearly distressed blonde sitting by herself. Arizona's head was in her hands and there appeared to be tears in her eyes. I waited too long, she thought. I should've spoken to her earlier.
Callie debated with herself, trying to decide how to approach the other woman. She didn't know if she should go with her first instinct and show some empathy or if she should pretend that nothing was wrong. Before she could decide, Arizona looked up as she was suddenly aware of Callie's presence in the room.
"Hey," Arizona said softly as she wiped the corner of her eye.
"Surgery not go well?" Callie asked, quickly realizing that maybe Arizona was upset because of a failed surgery.
"No, no, surgery went great. Mother and baby will both be fine," Arizona said, a small measure of pride in her voice.
"Stupid of me to ask," Callie commented, sitting down beside Arizona. "Of course you rocked your surgery. You're a fetal badass," she said with a smile as she nudged Arizona with her shoulder.
"A 'fetal badass'?" Arizona replied with a grin and a small laugh. "That just sounds all kinds of wrong."
Callie laughed. "Yeah, I probably could have worded it better," she agreed.
Arizona noticed how closely Callie was sitting next to her so she subtly shifted away from the brunette. Having Callie so near only made it harder for her.
"You done for the day?" Callie asked. She knew Arizona had no more surgeries; she just wanted to see if Arizona would manufacture some excuse to skip dinner.
"Yes," Arizona said, slowly nodding her head. "Herman told me to go home."
"Then Sofia and I expect to see you for dinner," Callie said firmly.
"Callie…" Arizona heart was a jumble of emotions and she didn't know if she could bear to be around the other woman just yet.
"No excuses, Arizona," Callie said as she stood up. "Usual time, like always."
"Callie, I don't think I can," Arizona protested weakly.
"Arizona, Sofia has been looking forward to it all week, especially since you missed Saturday." Callie didn't want to push the blonde, but enough was enough.
Arizona's shoulder slumped in resignation. She'd have to suck it up and get past it. Her daughter was too important for her to play this crazy avoidance game with Callie. She nodded her acceptance.
"Good, we'll see you in a little while," Callie said reaching for the door. She turned to face Arizona once more. "I've been looking forward to it, too, Arizona," she said before leaving the room.
Arizona's head snapped up in surprise with Callie's words, but Callie had already left.