Chapter 25; Restoration

The steps had been easy to climb. I had done so pretty confidently, taking two at a time. I had thought that maybe this would be easy, and that maybe this would be logical – after all, we had been best friends for so long now that the absence itself seemed illogical. It should be effortless, but yet here I was, standing rooted right outside the door. Ethan was on the other side, and my hand lingered above the wood. What was I going to say?

Beat him up and thrash him! Demanded my inner goddess, wanting me to put up a fight.

But whatever for? I sighed. Even though the hurt was still fresh, it was a fire that was slowly burning out. My annoyance with Ethan would never last, but our friendship would. We could work through this, and getting physical would only stifle it for a little while. I suppose the scariest part of it all was that the last time we had come into contact, we had literally come into contact.

"YOU BASTARD!" I had hollered at him, slapping him even after Christian had already beaten him up the first time.

All I was focused on was my pain and my anger, but the memory of Ethan lying lifeless on the ground was enough to plant a seed of regret in my tummy. The bitterness of regret began to spread as the image of Ethan's bruises and blood resurfaced in my mind. I had completely ignored his pain and his hurt. Ethan had made the biggest mistake ever, putting my marriage and my pregnancy on the line, and he already had to live with it. That alone was torture, and nothing I could do could worsen that agony. We had made up in the warehouse, had things changed since then?

He loved me. That's why he did what he did. Even though twisted and morally wrong, he had done it with me in mind. Focusing on that truth alone, I found the courage once more. Taking a step towards the door, I began to push.

Just then, the door was pulled open by Ethan himself. He stood in the doorway, his blonde hair tumbled into a terrible mess. His eye bags were thick from lack of sleep, but his eyes were haunted by something beyond the eye could see. This version of Ethan was so far from the one that had been in my life since we were young. This version of Ethan was broken, but he was still my bestfriend. A soft ache pulled at my chest, making it slightly hard to breathe.

"Oh, hey Ana." Ethan's voice was weak and he stumbled back slightly from the surprise of having the last person he wanted to see in his doorway. "How are you?"

I looked up at him, and he looked away. Afraid. All of a sudden, this distance – this glaring distance – no longer made sense. Sure, he did a bad thing, but there was no logical conclusion to getting mad or icing him out. He would always be in my life, and to be honest all I really wanted was to tear down this wall.

Stepping forward, I grabbed him into a tight hug. I wrapped my arms around his back and pulled him in close. Resting my head against his chest, I gave him the time he needed to realize that the reaction he had been anticipating was not coming. He just needed some time, and maybe I did too. Closing my eyes, I focused on my breathing, trying to give him space.

Then, I started to hear him sob. They were quiet little sobs, but they were ones of heavy guilt and self-loathing. I tightened my embrace, and I felt his arms begin to come around me as well. Ethan rested his chin on top of my own, and I could feel his tears begin to dampen my hair. Ethan was beginning to actually heal.

"You're okay, Ethan." I said, reassuringly. All I wanted him to know was… "I forgive you."

"This just messes me up so much." He cried, shaking his head back and forth in twisted agony. "I screwed up so bad."

"All that matters is that we're all here, safe." I told him.

"But the very idea that we may not have been because of me! UGH!" He groaned, his hands at my back balling into fists. "I had been so selfish, and I put your twins in wretched danger."

"It if makes you feel any better, they would have been in danger either way."

"Bloody Davis." He cursed, and I cussed mentally as well. The next time I saw that man I was going to tear him into shreds. "But Ana," He cooed softly, "that still doesn't change the fact that I did the same thing. Davis and I both desired you, and we both tried to take you from Christian… we both put your twins at danger."

His words broke my heart, "No, Ethan."

"I am the same man Davis is." Ethan spat, "We're both low lifes."

**Chapter continued on wwwwwwwww…pppaaatttrrreeeooonnn…ccc000mmm/catchingmystars **

Just remove the additional duplicate alphabets