Two words: Angst. Smut.
Enjoy,
G.
..
...
September 1st, Labor Day. Henry has had plans since school started to go on vacation with his little friend that he's known forever, Emma's away on vacation for the three-day weekend, and Regina is sitting at her empty, bare desk all alone – currently rolling a pencil around on the surface by pushing it with a pen. Exciting – it was a word she most definitely would not use to describe her life when she had no job, so to speak. She is ahead on her planning, all the way to next semester, and she forgot her book at the school.
She picks her phone up and looks at the screen, desperately waiting for a reply from Robin. This is pathetic, she thinks, realizing it's already 11:00 and she's done nothing but take her morning shower, get dressed, and wait for Robin's reply all morning. Pathetic, pointless, and stupid. Just stupid.
She pushes herself up from her desk and puts her phone face down on the surface, wincing when she realizes how hard she just slammed it down. She grabs it in her hand and picks it up quickly to make sure there are no cracks now residing there, and thankfully, there aren't. She sets it down again (safely, this time) and walks into the kitchen, completely oblivious to her phone ringing while on silent behind the now closed door.
She grabs a small bite to eat – some crackers with peanut butter slapped on them – and heads back to the living room to sit on the couch. She turns the television on and scans through her wide variety of DVR recordings, deciding that today is a good day to try and catch up on her shows since she has no annoying sitter, no cartoon-watching son, and no Robin texting her. She taps over to her favorite series (at the moment) being Castle, and presses play. She snuggles up under a blanket, the September air was starting to cool off but it still had enough heat. She crunches on her crackers, unknowingly getting crumbs caught in the fuzz on the blanket.
After that episode was finished, she moves on to the next one. Halfway through the third episode, she has five missed calls and doesn't even know it. She's finished her crackers and has gotten up once to get some lemonade (making a sour face once the tart of the drink mixes with the sweetness of the peanut butter), and she's back to sitting on the couch like a lazy log.
About halfway through this episode, she hears a knock on the door. She furrows her brows and takes the blanket off of her, fixing her hair a little before looking through the peephole. She opens the door with furrowed brows and asks, "Robin? What are you doing here?"
She sees he's been crying, or distressed or...both. She's not sure, but he's definitely been upset about something. He seems jittery and nervous. "You weren't answering your phone." He says with a sniffle, standing at the door and waiting anxiously to be let in.
She steps back, his cue to walk in, and follows him to the couch after shutting her door and locking it again. "That's because you weren't answering yours. I was about to go to your apartment and make you pay for a new phone for me, seeing as how you almost made me crack mine."
He lets her snarky comment pass and just buries his face in his hands, brushing his palms up and through his hair. "Okay, what's going on?" She finally asks, breaking the short silence that was lingering in the small room. It made her nervous to see him so...nervous.
He sighs. Regina can't tell if it's a "shut up I don't want to talk to you" sigh or an "it hurts to say this" sigh. "Today." He answers. Nothing more, nothing less. A simple today. What the hell was today, and why is it so important that he has to ignore her, come in her apartment and ruin her Castle marathon, and ultimately her somewhat good mood?
"Go on." She urges, sitting closer to him now.
He sighs and looks at her with a grim expression, "Today's Roland's birthday."
"And? Isn't that a good thing?"
He shakes his head, but catches himself and nods. "It is. The aspect of his birth is, but he's not here. And he's not with his family and he should be-"
She stops him by putting a hand on his arm, wrapping her fingers around his bicep and leaning forward to look in his face. "What do you mean that he should be with family?" She asks, "Isn't he with his mother?"
"His mother is dead, Regina." He says, whispering it like it still hurt him.
She stands up immediately, running her fingers through her short, ebony hair and placing her other hand on her hip while beginning to pace. "What do you mean? Where the hell is he, then?"
"He lives with her parents." He mutters out, burying his face back in his hands again.
This infuriates her. He couldn't have told her that his mother was dead? That the poor little kid lives with his dead mother's parents?! And to realize, too, that he was still really hurting over her, over this...over something, to the point where he's been crying. It was like a kick to the stomach, straight to her spinal cord and bending her over. All in her imagination, of course, but still. She paces in front of the coffee table, between it and the television. "Why couldn't you have told me, Robin? All this time I thought he was with his mother, not some distant relatives. Why does he even live there anyway, without you? You're still his father!"
He stands up defensively, clearly tired of the way she was speaking to him. "They got a court order against me, Regina! They said I was an unfit parent! Do I agree with them? Yes. Often I remember why I got that court order, why I'm not allowed to see the one and only son I love except for on certain weekends and holidays. Why he called my father-in-law Daddy before he ever got to call me that!" He shouts, anger flickering in his eyes and startling Regina.
She feels a bit guilty for accusing him, but her anger overrides that because of him never telling her. "I thought we were closer than that, Robin. After almost a month of being together, I thought you would've told me. But apparently not. If you were really planning for this relationship to go further than getting each other off on our couches and in our beds, then you should've considered not withholding the truth from me." She growls, her breathing heavy. She's not sure who is more startled from the other's anger at this point.
He walks closer to her and sticks a finger to his chest, "I did not tell you because I didn't want you hating me! Do you realize what I was before I was a coach and a teacher? I was not a nice guy, Regina. I already told you he was not planned."
"Yeah, and you told me that she was a one night thing, too. But you still could've had the decency to-"
"The decency?!" He yells, now screaming at her, "Well excuse me for not telling you that I've screwed more women than you've probably ever shaken hands with! I'm sorry for not telling you my whole life story in a month. What about you, Regina? Huh? What have you told me? Other than you had Henry? I don't even know who's his father! I don't know anything about you other than how you like to moan whenever I please you on my couch!" He shouts.
She steps back from him out of shock of everything he just said. That was a low blow, that was uncalled for. She then takes a step forward, teeth gritted and fists clenched. "Get out." She growls lowly, her voice cracking from her choking voice, due to yelling all that. "Now!" She shouts at him, her arms shaking and punching down in the air.
He looks down at her, "If that's what you insist." He says, completely hurt and looking like a wounded puppy dog, almost all of the anger simmering down and letting it show how hurt he was. But at the moment, Regina is way too angry to realize those sad blue eyes.
She follows him to the door and slams it behind him once he's just barely out of the doorway. She locks everything again and leans her back against the door, sliding down into a mess and beginning to cry.
He'd hurt her so badly. Why didn't he just be honest with her? Why didn't he just tell her about Roland living with his grandparents, instead of making Regina think he was in his mother's care. And most of all, why did he have to be with so many women before her? It completely broke her heart. She didn't know if she could let him back into her life, just for him to potentially hurt her again like this.
She eventually walks over to the couch and cuddles up in her blanket again, cracker crumbs and all. She has her phone, now, and calls Emma to tell her the situation, and to bring home lots of comfort food.
To her luck, Emma came home before Henry ever did, but Regina soon found out by phone call that Henry wanted to spend the night at his friend's house, and that he'd be in bed early and all. It didn't take much persuasion for Regina, she quickly said yes after the horrible day she's had.
Currently she's sitting on the couch, a half-empty, family-sized bag of Cheeto's Puffs in her lap and a regular coca-cola on the table, next to a whole bag of Hershey's kisses that Emma had brought home after she heard about their fight.
Emma walks to the couch and sits down, seeing what a mess Regina truly is. She doesn't say anything though, rather just opens her orange soda and looks mindlessly at the television. "So...what happened today?" She asks, trying to break the awkward silence.
Regina cocks her jaw to the side and opens her fourteenth Hershey kiss in the past ten minutes, throwing the foil on her lap with the rest of them. She didn't even care. "We were both mad." She says, not giving much information purposely. She didn't really want the blonde prying into her life.
But Emma insists, "Why?"
She shoots her a look, "Because we were. Okay?" She counters, trying to get her off the subject and let her eat her Cheeto and Herhsey kiss, concocted together, all in peace.
Emma scoffs and looks at her, "So you suddenly go from 'can't keep your hands off each other' to 'I hate you, leave my apartment'? Something happened between there." She says, popping an M&M into her mouth.
"Nothing happened!" Regina suddenly snaps, but decides to continue since she wanted so badly to know every detail of her life, "He wouldn't answer his phone all day. So then when I didn't answer mine, and it wasn't purposely, he got miffed and came to the apartment. He was all stressed looking so I asked him why, and he said today's Roland's birthday." Once she finished explaining all of it, the blonde's eyes were wide, lip bitten from the inside, and her expression showed nothing.
"Really? That's seriously all that happened? He told you he was with more women than you have shook hands with and you got all pissed over that?"
"I do hope you don't use that language around my son." Regina sneers.
Emma rolls her eyes and turns more toward her, "You just dropped the f-bomb like five times while explaining what happened, Regina. If anyone's slang is to worry about around your son, it's yours." She says, "I don't use it around him, but that's not my question. You're avoiding it." She pushes on, making Regina even more irritated (if that was even possible).
"Yes, I got pissed!" She snaps, pulling the blanket off of her shoulders and making the foils fly everywhere, one getting caught in her hair and she didn't even know it. "My boyfriend, the one who I thought was perfect for me and who I thought I could maybe have a future with, for once, tells me he's had sex with more woman than I've shaken hands with! Of course it pissed me off!"
"But was he, like, under contract with you since he grew a full size dick to never have sex with any other women other than you? I don't think that's the case, Regina. How many other men have you slept with before him? Huh? I know of at least two."
"I don't appreciate your bluntness and prying, Swan." Regina growls, her eyes narrowing and turning away.
Emma sighs, "There's really no helping you, is there? You want to feel sorry for yourself? Go ahead. Don't ask me to pity you because of something like that." She says, getting up and grabbing her bag of chocolates, making Regina furrow her brows and reach out childishly for them. "No, you don't need these. Look at yourself." Emma says, making Regina look at all the foils and swallow thickly, full of guilt. She sees the one in her hair and pulls it out slowly. "You better hope that you didn't make him go hurt himself, or crash his car or do something stupid, Regina. Because that's really harsh. If anyone was in the wrong here, it was you." She says bluntly, heading to the spare room that was set up for her when Henry wasn't here, since Regina doesn't like being alone.
Regina sinks into the couch and turns her face to the back cushions, pulling the blanket up over her head and ridding it of the rest of the foils, then starts absolutely sobbing. She reaches behind her for the remote and turns the TV off with a harsh press of her finger into the button, making her nail bend backward. She throws it down on the carpet and starts sobbing again.
Emma was right. She is a mess. But it's because of him. He hurt her. He did this to her. And she wasn't in the wrong.
She lies on the couch for a while, the next time she sees the clock after opening her eyes finally, it's already twelve in the morning. She looks at her phone, at the lock screen of her and Robin. She throws her phone across the room and against the chair, making the case snap off and flinging it everywhere. She turns again to the back of the couch, her breathing settling into a heavy and slow motion, her heart pounding, but the tears stopping. Now she is just mad.
..
…
Monday morning, seven o'clock, she's so glad she doesn't have to make sure Henry's all ready for school. She groans and rolls over, almost falling off the couch. She gets up and rushes to her room, her hair all in a tussled mess and her make-up still smeared from last night. She trips over her shoe on the floor, thinking it was Henry's at first but not getting quite as angry when she comes to the embarrassing realization that it's hers.
She throws on some clothes, black dress pants, an un-tucked, fitted, pink shirt, and quickly puts her hair up into a ponytail. She doesn't even care how she looks today – so much so, that she doesn't even look in the mirror before she leaves, even when today was one of those days that she really should have.
She walks out of the door, not even remembering to pick her phone and case up from last night. Normally, she'd wake up and the first thing she'd do would be turn her phone on to a good morning beautiful or good morning, girlfriend text. The thought did not cross her mind, not even once, the whole morning.
And of course traffic had to be horrible. What kind of bad day would it be if she wasn't stuck in traffic, late, and under dressed? Or if she had such a bad hair day that her hair has to be pulled back, her contact ripped and has to wear her ugly glasses, and feeling fat and bloated from all of the chocolate last night? Really. What else could go wrong at this point?
She honks at the car in front of her, causing traffic fights to erupt from the cars around her; people sticking their head out of their windows and yelling at each other. Good ol' Downtown Atlanta. She doesn't even care. She reaches for the knob on the radio and turns it to something she hasn't listened to in a long time, hardcore metal. She turns it all the way up and rolls her windows down, drowning out the sound of honking and people yelling. Even though, now, there's ten times more people yelling because her music is being spewed throughout all of the highway.
Thirty minutes later, she arrives to the school parking lot. Not only is her spot taken, but she realizes who it's taken by. That little bastard.
She scoffs and hits the steering wheel with the heel of her hand, but decides to match his game and pull up parallel behind him. She smiles at her win, turns her car off, and gets her things out.
Her class didn't go much better, either.
"Alright, everyone, settle down. Sorry I'm late." She groans, setting her things down and writing the date on the board. She feels something hit the back of her head, quickly turning around to see a wadded up piece of paper laying on the floor beside her feet.
That's when it all started. All hell breaks loose in Regina Mills' eleventh-grade literature classroom.
"Who threw that?!" She growls, looking at the classroom with the piece of paper balled into her fist.
Everyone suddenly became quiet. The room was totally and completely silent except for the nervous shuffling of feet that are now under desks. Regina could swear that she was hearing their hearts pounding, their thoughts buzz in their head of who is going to get in trouble first.
She grits her teeth and slams the ball of paper down on her desk, "I hope you know that I come here every morning for you little ungrateful students!" She snaps, "I put all of my time and effort into it and what effort do you put into it?!" She asks, looking each one of them in the eye with her harsh brown ones, "You throw paper at me! Why? What do I do to deserve this? Because I try to teach you something? Because I care and want you all to get good grades instead of just...passing you along?!" She rants, "Why?! Someone please tell me because I am so beyond tired of trying to come in to this insipid classroom and teach a bunch of ungrateful people who just want low grades to graduate! Sick of it!"
Randy – the boy who plays football and who Regina has noticed is incredibly shy, but sometimes stays to help Robin clean up the field after practice – slowly raises his hand while he's slouched in his seat. She nods, giving him the chance to speak, "I...I think it's because...none of us really know...what to do with a good teacher. Or how to act, really. You and Coach Locksley...you're the best teachers this school has and that I've ever had, and...I for one...don't want to lose you." He says, the nerves all the way up in his throat and tongue. For such a big guy his fingers sure do move quickly when he's nervous.
She nods, "Anyone else?" She asks, trying to keep the thought of Coach Locksley out of her head.
Patty – the other incredibly shy person in her class – raises her hand slowly as well. "I can't speak for the others, but I know that Randy is right. You and Coach Loc-"
"Please...I already heard that one."
Patty nods, "You're the best ones we've had, truly..."
"Thank you, though." Regina says, coming around to the front of her desk and leaning against it. She crosses her ankles and folds her arms over her stomach. Her expression was softer but still much more angry than any of them have ever seen her, "Anyone like to speak up about the paper?"
Everyone looks at each other with wide eyes, their mouths all must be sore from biting the insides of them so much. Finally, Peter raises his hand. "Miss Regina?"
"Just Regina." She replies, wishing they would learn that by now. It really isn't that hard.
He nods and stands up, "It was me. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have. You're a really good teacher, and you're right. You do come in here every day and teach us a lot, and we've all been getting really good grades, too."
It was then and there that Regina's day finally stopped sucking. It didn't get better, but it didn't suck.
That was, until lunch time. The time where she would normally meet Robin at her classroom door, walking with him to the teacher's lounge and having their shared lunches. She didn't even bring one today, she wasn't used to it anymore. So she leaves campus, unusual for her, and goes past Sonic where he gets his six-piece chicken tender meal with honey mustard, a side of mozzarella sticks, and a root beer float. Past Olive Garden where he gets the fettuccini alfredo every time he goes there. Instead, she heads straight for the place he doesn't like – McDonald's.
She orders the most unhealthy thing she can think of, because frankly she hasn't cared about her appearance today, so why start now? She pulls to the second window and gets her Big Mac and large fry, a large coca-cola to go with it and a McFlurry on top. She looks at it and makes a surprised face. Those seemed so much smaller when she was pregnant with Henry and made Daniel go get her some.
She puts it in the passenger seat and drives off, going home this time. She doesn't need to plan, still. She's already way ahead of schedule, and she just wants to be alone and eat her fattening meal in peace (like she was trying to do last night, but Emma wouldn't leave her alone).
She eats it in the parking lot, never leaving her little SUV. Somehow, she scarfed down the whole Big Mac, the whole large fry, and the whole Oreo McFlurry. Somehow.
A few hours later, once she's brought Henry home from school and fed him dinner, she's regretting her stupid mistake of eating all of that. It was just as stupid as waiting for Robin to call her or even acknowledge her existence yesterday. Just stupid. Everything is stupid.
..
…
Wednesday morning went a little better, after she changed her lock screen on her phone to a picture of Henry. She hadn't heard one word from Robin since Monday, and she was actually starting to get worried. She knew he was at school, because the little imp took her parking spot the past two days, but he still didn't even drop by her class or anything. She wasn't sure whether to feel hurt, that he just let her go like that, or to feel worried, because she may have hurt him too much.
And as mad as she is at him, she doesn't want to hurt him still.
So she decides, today, to wait around after school to pick up Henry. She takes him to the ball field at her school and waits for Robin to come and coach. Henry is off playing with a toy truck in the dirt beside the bleachers, but she's all the way at the top in a light coat, watching him with her teeth gritted. That anger is still simmering in the pit of her stomach, still bitter over the fact that he didn't tell her. But maybe...as much as she hates to admit it...Emma is right. Maybe she shouldn't be mad over it, because in reality they have only been dating a month.
But still, in the back of her mind, she feels slightly betrayed and thrown in the dirt over the whole situation. She feels like she at least deserved to know that Roland's mother isn't with us anymore, and that he lives with her parents. Maybe not, the part about him sleeping with other women. Emma had a point, there, unfortunately. She didn't tell him the other men she's slept with, and she hasn't even slept with him anyway. They've simply pleased each other, but nothing too serious.
She's so conflicted, she's like a statue when she sees him climbing up the bleachers. He stops about three steps down from her, looking up and taking a deep breath. She wasn't sure how to take that, whether it may be a "great, she's here" or an "I don't know what to say" breath. Then again, maybe she's over analyzing all of this. Again. "So...why are you here?" He asks.
Great. It was a "great, she's here" kind of breath. She sits up a little and tilts her chin closer to her shoulder, biting the inside of her mouth so hard that she'll later have sores. "I...just wanted to make sure you were-"
"Okay? Yeah, Regina. I'm fine." He snaps, clearly hurt.
She scoffs and stands up, "Look, I didn't come here to apologize so if that's what you're looking for you can just stop holding your breath. Because you hurt me a lot, Robin." She says, deciding not to add on so much so that I ate a whole family-sized bag of cheetos in two sittings, too many hershey's kisses, and so much other junk food. Or "comfort" food.
He scoffs, "Same old, Regina. Never your fault, is it?"
"Some of it may be my fault. I'm still not apologizing for the words I said." She says matter-of-factly, not backing down at all.
He shakes his head and turns to step down, but stops and looks back up at her. "Do you realize how badly you hurt me, Regina?" He asks. She was about to say something and he throws his hand up, "Hold on, let me finish." He orders, "How badly I wanted you to just comfort me on a day that I was missing my son? How badly I just wanted you to help me stop reminiscing over the person I once was, a drunk jerk who bedded a bunch of women and accidentally slipped up one night? I just wanted comfort and instead you grilled me on my whole life, just making me go home and turn in to that same drunk again." He says, his teeth clenching together and his cheekbone prominent.
She was taken aback, not realizing that he got hurt when he was already hurt. That he came her looking for help, and she threw him out of the door and slammed it harshly behind him.
"I'm not trying to pry an apology out of you, Regina, though one would be nice. But I'm really not. I just want to let you know how bad it hurt me to be thrown out of that door when I was just needing help, nothing more and nothing less." He continues, seeing her baffled expression being worn on her face.
Her mouth parts slightly and her chest finally moves with breath, "I'm...I didn't mean to."
He scoffs and shakes his head, trying to laugh and smile but it was clear it was fake. "You didn't mean to? To what? To throw me out and slam the door behind me? To make me sit in my car and ponder about just wrecking it and ending a worthless life?"
"Robin-"
"No...for once you don't get to speak, Regina. For once you need to hear what you do. Because I'm tired of being stepped on like this, and you just ignoring me for two days afterward."
"I didn't ignore you! You didn't want to talk to me!" She says, becoming emotional.
He swallows thickly, his adam's apple bobbing as his saliva runs down his throat. His eyes narrowing and his hands going into his pockets. "You're low, Regina." He says, turning and walking down the bleachers.
She picks her purse up and rushes down a few bleachers, "Wait! Okay? I'm sorry! I'm sorry I did that to you. I didn't know how badly it hurt you. I didn't know anything about you and I shouldn't have said those things." She admits, looking down and stopping. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
He turns to her and clenches his teeth. "And because you apologize, now, you think it's all better? That we can just go back to being that happy couple in the pouring rain, eating deli meat and taking Sonic trips?"
"I want to." Regina says desperately. Something she hated being, desperate. She can't believe how he's just tugging at her like this, making her spew things out that she wouldn't ever say to someone. But it's happening, and somehow she's slightly okay with it. "I want to just forget about it, because it was stupid. I shouldn't have said anything, it's not my business. I was just prying and prying into you life and I didn't need to."
Robin steps up two bleachers, now only a bleacher in between them. His hands in his sweatpants' pockets, his red whistle hanging limply on his royal blue polo. His lip was bit down so hard, she could see the outer part of it turning purple. "I forgive you. Simply because I care about you, Regina, and I hope you care for me too."
"I do..." Regina admits, "I really do."
He swallows thickly, she watches as he looks distraught and turns his upper half to the football field and then watches Henry. "Tell me one thing, then, Regina. Who is Henry's father?" He asks.
"Come home with me, please..." She pleads, "I'll tell you there. I'd rather not start tearing up in public again." She states, getting some of her sass back and trying to not think too much about Daniel until she has to.
He studies her, his still sad blue eyes scanning her dark brown ones for any hint of fowl play. "Fine." He says, "But we better go to Sonic first. I'm starving." He says, bringing Regina's mood up a little bit.
She's hoping so badly that she hasn't blown it with him. A man who understands somewhat what it's like to be a father, who loves Henry like she does, and who can really handle her. It's tense for the time being, and she's scared that will always be there now until it finally just comes between them so much, that it pushes them apart. And she can't handle even the thought of that.
After their quick Sonic run with Henry (who has fallen asleep on the way to the apartment), Regina and Robin both sit on the couch, but the distance between them is undeniable. Physical distance and emotional.
Regina is the first to finally say something, after grabbing a picture of Daniel from the side table. "This is him – Daniel is" She stops and catches herself, "Was his name. He's Henry's father, my late fiance." She explains, watching as he takes the picture gently from her hands and looks at it. The picture showed all three of them, Daniel, Regina, and Henry. It was the day Henry was born, only a day before Daniel died. Only hours before Daniel would never get to hold Henry in his arms again, and only hours before Regina would kiss his cold lips one last time.
He nods slowly, his expression soft and sympathetic as his eyes are still studying the hospital picture. "What...what happened to him?" He asks, cautious of her feelings.
She swallows thickly, knowing she agreed to this and knowing she needs to follow through. But the pain hurt her so badly. She suddenly realized that even though Marian didn't mean much to Robin, that she was still a part of him and he had every right to cry. Guilt came over her and she dropped a tear from her eye and down onto her cheek, rolling off and on her thigh. "It was the day after Henry was born. Daniel's parents had flown in from Kentucky where they lived and where he grew up, all to see their new grandbaby. Their first one, the big special one." She takes a moment to catch her breath, trying not to cry again. She sniffles and pulls herself back together, "On the way to the airport, February 1st, he got hit head on by a drunk driver. It was 6:02 in the morning." She says, still remembering it like it was yesterday. "The driver of the other car was killed, as well as Daniel and his mother. His father was in critical condition, had to stay in ICU through Daniel's funeral and everything. He ended up not even making it." She explains. "In an instant, the closest thing I had to parents were gone, my fiance was gone, and my son's father was gone."
Robin's mouth drops open and just hangs there, squeaking in the back of his throat as he tries to think of words to say, but fails. "Oh, Regina...I'm so sorry..." Robin sympathizes genuinely, bringing a hand to her knee and trying to comfort her like he wanted her to do Monday.
She looks down at it and is so overwhelmed with guilt, she starts sobbing. Actually sobbing. She stands up and brushes her hands through her hair, "Don't...I'm the one that still needs to apologize. I hurt you when you were already hurt, I kicked you when you were already on your knees. And you're still comforting me. How can you be so selfless when I'm the exact opposite, Robin?" She hisses through her tears.
He stands up with her and takes her by the arm, "Clearly we both weren't on our best behavior that day, Regina. Let's just forget about it, move on with our relationship. Because I'm still wanting to be with you. We both have imperfections and we're going to find them along the way, just like we did on Monday." He says, looking straight into her eyes and somehow his words went straight to her heart.
She nods and sniffles, trying to pull herself together again. "Right...okay." She whispers, though she knows it sounds a lot easier than it'll truly be.
He sighs and wraps his arms around her, pulling her into his muscular chest (that has gotten even more muscular since he's started coach football, she's noticed) and rubs her back in gentle and small circles. "Your fiance would be proud of the woman you are, Regina. A single mother who has provided for your son for ten years, and not taking anything less for him than he needs. Sacrificing some of your own wants for his. That's not selfish, that's true selflessness and you have it. It shows through that boy." He says seriously, pulling her off of him for a moment to look in her eyes. He tilts her chin up and her eyes open to see his. "I'm proud of you, and so would Daniel if he were here today. He's with you, he's right here." He whispers, cupping his hand over the place where her heart is.
She nods and puckers her lips as she tries to hold her cries in again. "I hope he is..."
"I know he has to be. And if he isn't, it's because he just hasn't paid enough attention." He says. After a moment he takes her to the couch and sits down, pulling her head into his lap to where she can feel him breathe. It makes her feel so comfortable, so safe.
Regina closes her eyes, her mind flashing back to that hospital room when Daniel held Henry for the first time. He was just cooing over how perfect he is, and how he had his nose. And he still does today, even. Daniel would be so proud of Henry, but of Regina? She isn't exactly sure of how proud he would be, especially after her behavior toward Robin this week. "I'm really sorry, Robin, for hurting you like that. Truly. I didn't even think about it, and I was being selfish that day. I was lonely and mad that you didn't answer me, jealous that everyone was out doing things and I was having a Castle marathon. And I just...I regret it so much now."
"Then let's never, ever speak of it again. Erase these last two days from our memories now because we won't ever need them again." He says, subconsciously rubbing his fingers through her hair that is spread over his thigh.
She shakes her head, "Not before I tell you what happened today." She says, finally coming to terms with her embarrassing situation this morning.
He looks down at her with a concerned expression, "What happened?"
She sighs and sniffles, gearing herself up to relive this. "Today, my early class, they all brought a cake in for me. Long story short, it's because I made them feel bad for not treating me right – a story I'll save for a little later – and I was sitting down at my desk and I read it. It said: Thank you for being a good teacher, Regina. And it was really great. It had this huge apple on it and it had a few books, because of the literature part." She says. All through this Robin was nodding, but keeping that concerned expression. "Well...the cake was setting on this big book that we're reading right now, and it was open and hanging slightly off the desk. When I get up to hug my students, I pushed down on the book and flipped the cake all down my dress and onto the floor. It was so humiliating."
By now, he's laughing so hard that she had to sit up off his lap. She rolls her eyes and mutters laugh it out. Ha-ha. "Oh gosh, Regina. Did you get video?" He asks, and she shakes her head. "Please tell me someone got video!"
"Hopefully not!"
He smiles over at her and opens her coat, seeing the remnants of the cake splattered all over her black dress. "Ahh, and that's why you're wearing a long trench coat on a sunny day!" He says with a laugh, still completely amused and enthralled.
She rolls her eyes and rips the coat from his hands, dramatically shutting the gap and covering the cake stain. "I'm so glad I could entertain you over my humility." She mumbles, flipping her hair.
He leans over and kisses her, then slides down her upper body and rests his head on her lap, this time. "Very much so, my dear. Very much so."
..
…
Robin had gone home that night, saying he needed to change out of his football clothes before he had to smell them again. Regina hated it, though, that he had to leave. She hated leaving like that, still that looming feeling of distrust and betrayal on her end. She had realized she was totally in the wrong, last night, when he said those things to her. She shouldn't have ever pried into his life.
But today, she's happy to see the good morning texts started up again. She shoots a text back to him with a smiley face before getting out of bed and preparing for the day ahead.
The day went relatively smooth, at least it was much smoother than Monday, Tuesday, and even Wednesday.
She picks her things up to head for lunch, going out of the classroom and locking the door behind her. She almost drops her stuff and shrieks when she is goosed by Robin. "Hello, m'lady. Would you like to have lunch with me today?" He asks, the sarcasm just dripping from his tongue.
She smirks and takes a deep breath, "Now is that any way to greet a lady?" She asks, walking past him.
He catches up with her and walks beside her, "Of course it is, at least when she's mine..." He says and gooses her again.
She shrieks and looks back at him with wide and alarmed eyes, "Robin..." She growls, "If someone sees you we could both get fired..."
He chuckles, "All is fair in love and war."
"What is that...that's so not relevant." She says, opening the door for the teacher's lounge and finding it empty, just the way she likes it.
He comes up behind her while she's digging through the fridge, "Whatever. I was thinking we could go on a date tomorrow?"
"A date? Robin, please not another bar..."
He shakes his head, "No, no no no. That was a disaster, nothing on your part but just...a disaster." He says, making a sighing noise. "No, I was hoping something more traditional? Like dinner at my place?"
"Dinner? You cook?"
"I've learned a thing or two."
"Oh, so you've been watching Food Network again?" She asks playfully, getting that flirtatious banter back as she sets the food out on the table and pulls out a chair.
He sits across from her and shrugs, "It's a possibility, but that doesn't mean I haven't learned how to cook anything."
"Oh?" Regina asks challengingly, stabbing the broccoli on her plate with her fork. "And what shall you be cooking tomorrow, Great Chef?"
He narrows his eyes, sensing her sarcasm and making her grin. "It's a surprise."
"I don't like surprises. I find them threatening, like the meat in the cafeteria..."
"True." Robin agrees, but sticks his fork in the broccoli and twirls it around with a slight look of disgust worn on his face. "No...not that kind of surprise, though. It's a good one, and you'll like it. I learned to make it just for you, Regina."
She smiles and raises her brow as she chews up a broccoli piece, "Oh have you?"
He nods enthusiastically, taking a bite of his "nasty green stuff" as he calls it and looking up at her with those soft eyes of his. "I have indeed." He says with his mouth full, but catches himself doing so and quickly covers it to not make Regina upset. He finishes chewing it, then swallows, then brings his napkin back to his lap instead of on the table. "Please? Just agree to it? If you don't like it we can order some take out Chinese or something."
She ponders the idea for a moment, scooting her cauliflower around on her plastic, disposable plate. "Okay...fine. Only if there's wine too."
"Oh, there will be wine. Your favorite, too. And I also maybe got some cheesecake from the bakery in town..." He says with a cheeky smile.
She smiles softly, "It sounds like a date, then, if you have cheesecake." She says, being flirtatious and coy like she always could be with him.
She was happy to realize their fight didn't do anything to their relationship, it had only brought them closer in a way. And Regina knew, the next time he needed her help that she would be right there, the first one to help him. Not make the same mistake again and almost cost her a really nice man, and a really nice man to her boy, too. She was still scared, though, that she would screw this relationship up somehow.
"Glad I won you over with the cheesecake and not my charmingly handsome face."
She rolls her eyes and scoffs, throwing a piece of broccoli at him. Even she can easily admit, that broccoli is nasty. "I try to stay away from that charmingly handsome face, it seems to get me in trouble."
"What kind of trouble, m'lady?"
She smiles. The kind of trouble that makes her give her heart away to a total thief. A hustler. And a once jerk. "Just...trouble." She answers with a sly grin, looking down and continuing to eat.
..
…
"Hey, Regina?" Robin said on the other end of the phone. "I ran into a problem. The wine spilled all over my floor, and I have nothing else but hard liquor and I know you don't want that. I hate to ask...but can you bring some? The food is already cooking and I can't leave it-"
"Yes, Robin." She interrupts him, reaching behind her and zipping her fitting, sleeveless red dress up. "Really, it's no problem at all. I can bring it." She says, already thinking of which wine to bring. Her best one, of course.
He tells her thank you, they say their goodbyes and she steps into her black heels. She goes to the kitchen after grabbing her phone and purse, getting the wine and setting it carefully in her bag that hangs over her shoulder. "Henry?" She calls out, "I'm going to go with Robin tonight, Emma will tuck you in tonight, okay?"
"Okayyyyyy..." He groans from the living room, his eyes glued to the television. She comes in and turns it off.
"Homework." She commands, and he does so. He already knows he's supposed to do it before watching cartoons, not after. But he likes to push her buttons sometimes, even when her buttons have been pushed way too many times this week. She is just glad that it's Friday and tomorrow she gets to go watch Robin coach, hopefully it'll be a win since it's the first football game of the season.
After she hugs Henry and kisses him on the cheek (leaving red lipstick residue that she absolutely adores on those little chubby cheeks), she walks out the door and heads to Robin's.
She knocks on his apartment door, standing on the front stoop while waiting for him to answer. He comes to the door with an apron on, a bit of what looked to be spaghetti sauce on his cheek. "Good evening, Regina." He says with a big smile, inviting her in by taking a step back.
She steps in and smiles, snickering a little when she turns to him and wipes the sauce from his face with her index finger. "Mmmm...tasty!" She coos, sticking it in her mouth and licking it off, her lips closing around her finger.
He narrows his eyes playfully, "I never said I was the cleanest." He counters, closing the door behind her and walking to the kitchen again.
Regina takes this time to look around. She notices his apartment is spotless – well...mostly, there's probably twenty candles illuminating the room, making the light flicker a little each time the flame would. It smells like heaven between the pasta and the candles, which are all apple pie scented she notices (and she can't help but smile at that, him remembering that was her favorite scent when she was a child). She stalks in further, clutching her bag in her hands and holding it over her legs, her thighs making it bounce up with each step. The bean bag chairs are set to where they're facing each other, with a cloth between them for the food. A candle is placed in the center of that as well.
She smiles and looks back in the kitchen where he's juggling to finish his planned out meal, seeing him struggle made her beam, realizing he's doing all of this for her. He's coming out with it now, two plates in two hands, his apron still on that says Kiss the Cook. He sets them in front of the bean bag chairs and scurries off to the kitchen again, coming out with two wine glasses and silverwear. "Alright, are you hungry?" He asks, taking his apron off and hanging it on the coat rack, showing off his attire for the evening: dark jeans, a royal blue, button-up shirt, and a nice belt.
She nods, "Indeed." She replies, reaching for the wine in her purse and handing it to him. He takes it and thanks her for bringing it, but she doesn't even hardly realize what he's saying. She's too caught up in the fact that he's still doing all of these things for her, even after what she did to him Monday. And in the back of her head, wanting to come forward and into the front, she realizes a strong fact: she's falling in love with him. Head over heels.
He looks over at her, standing beside the bean bag. "Regina?" He calls out, but she doesn't even hear him. She's still staring at him, holding her bag with both hands. "Regina?"
"Oh!" She exclaims, finally snapping out of her daze. He laughs and shows her to her "seat", taking her bag and setting it on the couch next to them. She sits down on the bean bag and folds her legs underneath her, straightening her dress out once she gets situated. "This is really nice, Robin...I wasn't expecting it to be so..."
"So clean?" He asks with a chuckle. "Before you get too proud of me, I hired a maid." He admits, pouring the wine in her glass first, then his. "I didn't have enough time with teaching today, then football practice."
She nods, "I understand, but a maid is better than nothing." She teases. He laughs a little at her joke, and she also realizes how much she's missed that laugh in just the two days they weren't speaking to each other. His smile, the way his blue eyes sparkle when he talks to her, and most of all, his warm hugs.
They begin to eat, and once they've each had two glasses of wine, a plate of five-cheese ziti like Regina likes, and a slice of cheesecake, their chairs are scooted together and they're leaning against the couch, but Regina is mostly leaning on him. He's drawing lazy circles on her forearm, looking down at her perfectly balanced skin. "Was the meal good?" He asks.
She nods, "It was very good, much better than I'd ever imagined you could cook, to be completely truthful." She says with a small smile, her eyes looking up at him.
He smirks and continues the circles, making the hair rise on her arm. "Good, I was hoping I could surprise you." He whispers. After a short moment of comfortable silence, she feels him take a deep breath in, her ears picking up the noise of what sounds like a gulp. "About what I said on Monday, about...me being...me. I...it was all true. Is all true, actually. And I just want you to know I don't do that anymore. When I saw you in the school hallway that day, I knew that I could stop there, because there wouldn't be anyone else I even wanted. And there still isn't. I just...I feel like a pig, sometimes, over all of it. And I want to forgive myself but I can't, so I'm just hoping you can forgive me for it."
His words melted her heart, the way he wanted to change for her. She knows he came here to start a new life, to leave that old one behind, but the thought of her helping him stay this way really made her warm inside. "Of course I will, Robin. It's not...it's not like you were under contract with me, or something, to not sleep with anyone." She whispers back, sliding down to lie on his thighs and look up at him. She brings her hand to his chin and rubs his scruff, "Neither was I, that's why we both have children and they aren't from the both of us. But...I'm just glad I've helped you become the man you want to be."
He nods and starts running his fingers through her hair – all spread over his jeans – and takes another deep breath, but this time Regina feels it to be more calm. "Yes, you have. And I can't thank you enough for it." He says softly, looking down into her eyes.
Regina swallows thickly, knowing how much she was falling in love with him. She wants to tell him, her heart is yearning for her mouth to just let her say it. But she doesn't, not yet. It's too soon to say it. Instead, she pulls him down slowly and presses her lips to his for a heated but slow kiss. A kiss that makes her stomach flip, that makes her hands rub against his scruff even more. She opens her eyes to see his closed ones, admiring the passion he has when he kisses her. She knows...she knows it's time. She pulls away softly, letting their lips unseal with a soft pop. "Robin?"
"What is it, m'lady?" He whispers, still admiring her with a soft expression.
She clears her throat, now it's her turn to take a nervous and deep breath. She opens her mouth to say something, but stops and pulls him down slowly again for another heated kiss. She moans and relaxes her body before rolling to her knees, sitting on her own bean bag, now. She reaches for the zipper of her dress and slowly pulls it down, watching Robin as his facial expression changes; his lips parting and his eyes watching her every move. She lets the dress fall and pool around her knees, then steps out of it. The innocent expression worn on her face matches the way she's holding her body, almost shy of herself. Her hand extends to his chin, her thumb rubbing over his mouth, whispers, "I think it's time, Robin." and gives a short hum.
Blue eyes have never changed so quick from bright to dark with lust as Robin catches the hint. He turns his body to face hers, placing his rough hands on her soft, baby-like skin, settling on her waist. He raises to his feet and picks her up with him in a swift and easy motion, his mouth immediately on hers as soon as they both found their feet. His right hand roams the curve of her back, down to her ass and below. It stops at the top of her thigh and his other hand joins on the other side, hauling her up on to his waist. Kisses are being fervently placed on her neck, making her back arch and her breasts rub against his chest as he stumbles his way to the bedroom.
When Regina opens her eyes again, the realization hits her that this is happening. She almost feels like backing out, but she's the one who said yes to it. She's the one who suggested it, so she lets herself be lain down on the bed. Her arms come above her head, making her clothed breasts rise underneath her chin as he stands between her legs, still peppering kisses along her skin. She feels him stop and suck at her collarbone, and she closes her eyes thinking of the mark that will leave, and the turtle necks she'll have to wear.
He stops and opens his eyes, his dilated pupils meeting hers. "Are you sure?" He asks, being the gentleman he always has been with her. When she swallows and nods, he starts again. His hands glide her body up the bed until she's in place where she should be, his knees crawling up on the edge and staying between her legs. Muscles of his chest meet her pelvis, her stomach, then her aching breasts. Stubble meets soft skin beside her lips again, and now his hand is working over her lacy, black bra. She lets out a whimper of some sorts, aching to be touched and rubbed, massaged and loved.
She positions her hips against his, wrapping her long legs around his waist and feeling that friction against her wet center. She's realizing that she's not doing anything, that she's just letting him take her so easily. Her eyes open again and she bites at her lip, reaching between them to feel for his erection. Her fingers find his belt – a constriction in her eyes – and quickly unbuckles it to where it's hanging from his hips, the buckle and post making a quiet clinking noise amongst all the sloshy noises from Robin's kissing. The button is quickly undone and she finds his erection in his boxers, wrapping her fingers around him gently.
Her hips still are grinding against his, making him moan as his tongue drags down her chest and to the valley of her breasts. He finally (finally – in her mind) reaches down to the front clasp of her bra, letting her breasts finally be free and looking down with wide eyes. He mumbles something to her about how beautiful she is every time, but she can't hear him from the pounding of her heart and practically her whole body. Damn, he made her feel perfect.
Moaning emerges through the room from her mouth and her eyes close again as his suddenly wraps around her rosy nipple, hard and erect. His tongue swirls over and over, making her hand squeeze a little tighter and a chain reaction from Robin, letting out a groan. Her body jerks at the sensation of his tastebuds over her skin, just as he switches to the other one. His attention is never only on one, letting his hand twirl and gently pinch as his mouth words on the other.
She hisses his name, oh- OH! Just like that, just like that. Her other hand slides up and into his hair, tangling her fingers around in the dirty blonde mess. She's going to come just like this if he keeps it up, not that she really minds doing so like this. But she wants to feel him inside of her, penetrating her to the deepest extent. So she opens her eyes and stops him by placing her hand on his forehead, pushing him back and away from her breast reluctantly. She nods, letting him know what she wants.
If she didn't know better, she would've thought he was already naked – just from the short amount of time it took for his bare erection to be rubbing against her panties. His fingers roam between her thighs, feeling around and then realizing. "Crotchless?" He whispers.
The blush on her cheeks are undeniable as she bites her lip shyly, nodding and making him smile even wider. He shakes his head, mutters something about her naughtiness, but pulls her panties down anyway. "I want to see you...all of you..." He whispers, throwing the panties to the floor on the side of the bed. He groans and she can see his stomach heave, his cock jerk, as he sees how wet she is for him. It embarrasses her a little, being so wet for a man. But that's how she felt around him, he could do it to her so easily.
She jerks upward as she feels a finger under her entrance, sliding up and collecting the evidence of how ready she was. He holds his finger up and licks it, mmmm. Damn...he's so hot. Through all of it, her mind didn't cross the fact that she's not on birth control since she stopped dating Graham. Her eyes widen and she stops for a moment, hissing, "Condom." before letting him continue.
He groans unpleasantly and reaches over for his drawer, grabbing a condom out of the mess. He opens the package and slides it on begrudgingly. She can tell he doesn't like condoms, but she has no choice unless she wants to get pregnant, and that's not something she was wanting right now. He crawls up her body and places his erection at her center again, squeezing her breasts together with his hands as he pushes inside of her. Regina's belly tenses, her muscles clenching around him as she adjusts to his size. Her eyes were wide, not realizing how big he was before this was a foolish mistake. He asks if she's okay, and she nods, letting him go on.
A huff, a whimper, emits from her mouth again as she's penetrated, his tip pushing against her hilt. The back of her head digs in the bed, moaning embarrassingly loud. Her mouth opens, finally, to fill her lungs with much needed air. Hands set on his cheeks as she yanks him to her, making his lips crash on hers.
Finally, she gains control of her body – only a little. Enough to be able to move her hips up into his, showing that she wants him and showing that she's okay. His length stretches her to her fullest, but she's so pleased that she doesn't even think of the slight pain she's feeling. The pleasure overtakes that too much.
Hips are thrusting on both of them, moving in and out of her with moans echoing off the walls. His tongue was dancing on hers in their mouths, battling for who will be in whose mouth. Regina knew she wouldn't last long, that it's been so long since she's been so aroused. She moans and starts to feel herself tighten around him already, but she closes her eyes tighter and holds out. She doesn't want to stop yet. She can't. She won't. She needs more of him before she's finished, and that's just what she insists on.
Her hips tilt up to where he's hitting her in the spot, making a jolting Ah! come off her lips. "Robin..." She moans out, gripping his biceps as he holds himself above her. He nods, knowing what she's saying. She could feel him tense up, his stomach get tight until they both released at the same time. Moans reverberating off each other as he collapses on her momentarily.
Her chest was heaving, breasts enlarged slightly and her whole body finally feeling pleased after so long. When he falls beside her, taking the condom off and throwing it in the trash next to his bed, he wraps his arms around her body and pulls the covers up over them. "There's no way in hell you're leaving me tonight..." He rasps, his voice still filled with lust.
She shakes her head, "No way in hell I'd want to leave you tonight." She whispers back.
..
...
Phew. That was one heck of a chapter, if I do say so myself.
Please remember to be nice in your reviews :) thank you!
G.