Oops, look what happened on the way to the wedding. Sometimes these things surprise even me.

Kate's Story

"What does that mean? 'We've come this far'."

Looking slightly embarrassed, "It will be the first time I've actually brought someone for the all the McKenzies to meet. Except Richard."

Very surprised, "Ever?" At Kate's nod, "But I thought they knew that you… your extended family."

Shrugging a little uncomfortably, "They do know. They've just not been faced with it before."

"Then how do they know?"

"The way families always know, I suppose. One knows and before long they all… just know."

Confused, "But I thought… You let me think it was all cut and dried with you, out and proud."

A little defensive now, "I didn't actually say that. I did say, 'do you think its easy for anyone?' when you told me it was hard for you."

Caroline gives Kate a long scrutinizing look. "You seemed so calm about it, I thought it was old news to your family." Kate said nothing but she looked a little chagrined. "So is this going to be an ordeal for you? For your Mum?"

Slowly, "No. Not in the way it was for you with Celia. It's just…"

Seeing that suddenly Kate was having difficulty expressing herself, "I'd be interested to know how it was, is for you. With your family. It's not something we've talked about before."

With the timid look on her face that could turn up when Kate talked about herself, "I told Mum & Dad a year or so after Richard and I divorced. They were pretty stunned. At first I think they just thought it was an overreaction from all that Richard and I went through with the babies and my depression or something. But after a time, I asked them to dinner to meet Lydia, the woman I was seeing then. They were… polite. After all that they had been subjected to for so many years, the slights and prejudices, they wouldn't be anything else but the evening was... a bit strained. They accepted then that I meant it when I said I was more attracted to women than to men. I'd tell them about where I went, with whom but I didn't make a big thing of inviting anyone I was seeing to family events. I hadn't met anyone I cared that much about really. I didn't bring anyone else to meet Mum and Dad either. It was just… dating, nothing to make it worth the awkwardness."

"Mum & Dad were always close with Gordon and Eileen so I suppose at some point they told them and it wasn't a secret really so, it went around the family. Once, in Leeds, at a concert, I ran into Scotty and Brenda. I was with someone, they'd seen that it wasn't platonic; I mean we had our arms around one another's waist and she'd just put her head on my shoulder as I looked up and saw them. I made introductions and it was fine. I just never felt strongly enough about anyone to bring them to McKenzie family gatherings, make it worth putting my Mum through it. By then Dad was more and more out of it."

"Put your Mum through it? Would they be unkind about it?"

"No. No, nothing like that. The McKenzies are never unkind but becoming one of them, that is another matter. It's just that it took a long time for Mum to feel really accepted by my Dad's family. By the time she did, I made things worse for her again and now this."

Intrigued, "Why? What happened?"

Smiling ruefully, "Really it started long before that. Are you ready for the story of my life?"

Squaring around on the sofa and sitting cross-legged, Caroline took Kate's hand, "I'd like that. Very much. I have wondered."

Smiling bravely, "You may be sorry you said that, but here goes." Plumping up pillows at the end of the sofa to support her back, Kate turned to face Caroline, wrapping her legs either side of where she sat. "I took a gap year. I had a friend, Janie, her mother had a cousin in France who ran a music and dance studio. It was mainly lesson and rehearsal rooms to let, although Madame coordinated some lessons as well. It wasn't far from the university and there was a shortage of rehearsal space there, so students booked rooms by the hour to practice their instruments or get in an extra dance session. Upstairs on one side of the big dance studio was a small apartment that Janie and I shared."

Caroline could see the excitement building in Kate at the retelling, she was captivated, "What did you do?"

"We took appointments, manned reception, cleaned rooms, whatever needed doing. I gave a few piano lessons, Janie taught some violin, the two of us catered to the local children mainly. We didn't make much money but we had a place to stay and we were in France."

Kate was looking into her mind's eye now, "We got to know the regulars, the students. As time went by they would ask us to their parties or out for coffee or to the clubs. One night in late winter, at closing, one of the ballerinas, who had been part of these groups from time to time, came out from a session. We got talking and went for coffee." Smiling to herself, Kate said, "Dominique. She was engaging, vivacious, very talkative."

Caroline smiled admiringly into Kate's face, "And you were sweet and self-effacing and a good listener even then, weren't you?"

Ignoring this except for the smile she returned, "She told me about her family and the small vineyard they owned, the young man her parents had chosen for her to marry and, as feudal as it sounded, it was what she planned to do, in a few years, when the time was right. She told me that she had wanted to be a professional dancer but now she knew that she didn't have the talent for it. She was very philosophical, about that and… everything as it turned out. She loved to dance though and continued her studies. She said all her friends were dancers and she was bored with their self-centered ways, she wanted to be around 'normal' people sometimes.

Catching Caroline's eye, "So, we went shopping, met her friends for coffee or sometimes we went to the clubs. One night we went to a party and afterward she came up to the flat. Janie was still out. We sat and talked for a while, then she kissed me." Kate paused to read Caroline's face but saw she only smiled enouragingly waiting for the story to continue. "It was like nothing I'd experienced before. Slow and gentle, electrifying. She was sweet and undemanding. She said she wouldn't be offended if I didn't feel the same, we could still be friends, just as before. Then Janie came in and Dominique left soon after."

Confiding to Caroline, "I didn't know what to think. It was totally unexpected. Maybe it shouldn't have been but I was a total innocent at the time. I had dated a little, while I was at school, with boys, but kissing them had never been like this."

"The next week, it happened again." Watching Caroline's face, Kate said softly, "I kissed her back this time. Then we began to look for ways to be alone together and the relationship escalated and… we were an item. Janie was a little shocked I think. At first. But… we were in France and everything was new and different so…" Kate's nose had wrinkled up at this last. "Besides she had a boyfriend, one of the students and they had become quite involved as well."

"By this time it was late spring. Janie and I were leaving for home the end of July. Dominique and I knew it couldn't last long but we tried not to think of that and we were very intense." Embarrassment evident, "Well, I was very intense. Being the sophisticate that she was Dominique was far more philosophical about it. She reminded me that she had explained it all to me that first night. Nothing was changed, what we had between us would be something beautiful for us to remember. So, when the time came we parted. Tearfully. Regretfully. I was devastated. Kate looked at Caroline almost imploringly, "It didn't seem right that something so beautiful could just… end."

Watching Kate's face, saddened by the memories, "Did you keep in touch?"

"A few letters, but naturally that was never going to be enough and it became… too painful and we simply stopped."

Regarding Caroline, a little embarrassed, "My first sexual experience."

Taking her hands, "Kate. It sounds beautiful. I'm sorry it ended so painfully for you."

Smiling, "It was beautiful. It was unique." Sitting forward, Kate told her earnestly, "Caroline, until you, no one has had such an effect on me. You may think that I'm being fanciful," Kate looked at her solemnly, "But I had plenty of time to think about this when we were apart. I have come to believe that Dominique happened to me as a sort of… herald to you. To what we would one day have together. So that I would know that such feelings were possible. So I wouldn't settle for something less. There have been women I've dated but the relationships were not very serious… there was something vital missing in all of them. It had been there with Dominique… but not again until you. I'd just about given up hope of finding that feeling ever again. I thought for a long time it only happened because I was so young and inexperienced."

Brown eyes shining, "Then I met you. It was a sensation that I hadn't felt in almost twenty years. You were obviously straight and my boss, so I put it away, I knew it could never be. But it never really went away." Chuckling, "Not that you helped matters."

Genuinely surprised, "I didn't? What do you mean?"

Laughing, "Oh Caroline, you were further into denial than I thought." Suspiciously, "You really don't know?"

Her voice rising an octave higher, "What?"

"Truly? You aren't aware of all the times when you would sit or stand next to me in a group of teachers? Brush your shoulder against mine as you laughed or talked? Put a finger on my hand to make a point? Touch my shoulder or arm?"

Leaning back, disbelieving, "Kate."

"I hoped no one else noticed. I must admit I was a little confused." Smiling, "Until later."

Caroline, remembering those days suddenly realized. Fingers covering her mouth, she was dismayed. "I think I may have... Oh, Kate. I'm so sorry. It was subconscious. I would never have deliberately led you on. What you must have thought of me."

Teasing her, "It did put a little drama into my days. Wondering if we would encounter one another today. At least I knew you liked me." Considering, "I think that's what gave me the courage to not let you brush me off the day I found you outside. That day I took the shortcut between wings." Seeing that Caroline remembered too, "You'd looked so sad all week and here you were just standing there, staring off into the distance, with only a jumper on, as cold as it was."

"I'd seen your eyes following your boys across campus a few times that week. I thought maybe something was wrong with one of them. When I asked if everything was all right you just said, 'Yep' and waved me on. But I couldn't leave you like that."

Picking up the story, "You insisted, 'You haven't been yourself all week. Something is wrong'. I thought I'd been covering pretty well, no one else had said anything. You touched my arm and said 'What is it?' So then, I just blurted it out, 'John's left me for another woman'. Then you asked me if I wanted to talk, when I hesitated you said that you would be at the tea shop in your neighborhood doing some marking if I wanted to come by." Her face grave at the memory, "I almost didn't go that day. It felt so… self indulgent, talking to someone."

"I was glad that you did. Not that there was anything I could say or do to help really. But you did look a little better when you left."

"I felt better. A little less daft and useless."

"I was very glad when you came again, and then a couple of times a week there for a while." Smiling into Caroline's eyes, "Remember the Friday night we went to dinner?"

Caroline smiled bashfully at this. "I was so nervous that night. I'd begun admitting to myself by then the attraction I felt for you. I drank too much and behaved like a fool."

"You had me in a state before you even finished that bottle of wine. I had all I could handle looking at magnificent you and keeping up my end of the conversation while you were brushing my knee with yours, letting your foot rest against mine, touching my hand. I was a wreck."

Remembering her state of being that night, Kate found that she had to swallow before she could continue, "And then you came to lean against my car, right beside me as I bent to unlock the door for you. In your grey wrap with the coral scarf I had given you for Christmas and your intoxicating scent." Kate sat forward now, "As I stood up, there you were with your face raised, your eyes on my mouth and I realized that you wanted to be kissed."

Blue eyes alight with the memory, Caroline said wonderingly, "So you did." Her breathing rate increased just by the act of remembering, "It was the most amazing feeling I'd had for decades." Eyes on the parted lips before her, "Then you just stayed there, not moving away. Your face so close. It was unbearable."

Softly, "So, you kissed me."

Blue eyes meeting brown, softly proud, "I did, didn't I?"

Beaming, "Oh, you did! When your tongue touched mine I felt self-control slipping away. I knew how much you'd had to drink and that I had to be the responsible one but it was so not what I wanted to be. Afternoon tea with Dr. Elliot had in no way prepared me for this night. For provocative you. I had to lean on the boot of the car on the way around and take in a few more lungs full of cold air before I dared get into there with you."

Caroline's delighted with this revelation. "Did you?"

Laughing gently, "Turns out I needn't have worried. By the time I got in you were asleep. So sleepy that I had to walk you to the door and wait for William to take you inside."

Caroline mused, "The next day I wondered if we'd actually kissed or if I'd dreamed it. But when we met at school on Monday I knew by your face that it had happened. You were searching my eyes to see if I remembered and of course I did and blushed. So then, you knew that I remembered. Good thing we were on the crossover again, the cold air felt good."

Kate watched appreciatively as a slight flush came over Caroline at the memory. She swallowed again to keep from kissing Caroline right now and altering the deliciousness that was building between them. "I invited you to dinner at mine."

Then it was two weeks before I could get free to accept. I was afraid you'd change your mind."

Allowing herself a moment to take in the loveliness before her, "Oh, trust me, that was never going to happen. I was fascinated to see who would arrive that night. Dr. Elliot worried about her children or that tantalizing woman who had me so aroused at the restaurant." Musing, "It turned out to be neither. You were quiet, almost shy and dressed so elegantly casual the way only you can. You blew me away all over again."

Brown eyes scanning the face that still had the power to surprise and delight her, "We talked about everything that night except ourselves. I told you about Kevin and no matter what came up in our discussion of world affairs you had something sapient to add. I wondered when you found the time to keep so current on everything." Watching Caroline shrug this off, Kate went on, "I was afraid this was you trying to erase what had happened between us."

Looking self-conscious, "It was. But talking with you, your intelligence, your passion for people and justice was as appealing as you in jeans and a jumper moving around your lovely home, waiting on me, listening to me, watching me. Eyes on Kates, "I think really, it was that night I fell in love with you."

"I was shocked when you kissed me at the front door. You had been so circumspect all evening. You turned from letting me help you with your coat, I thought that was it, until I saw your face… then you kissed me so sweetly."

"And the sound you made… Well, I couldn't just leave, there had to be more."

"Oh Caroline, I'd never been kissed like that before. Ever. It was you, I was permeated with an evening of glorious, magnificent you."

"It took everything I had to open the door and walk out that night instead of taking off my coat and following you up the stairs."

"I wanted you to stay." Faces growing closer and closer through these last revelations, the two surrendered to the tension of these poignant memories.

"Caroline..."