To love is to see myself in you and to wish to celebrate myself with you.
- Nathaniel Branden
Hanna, Paige, and Emily had settled into a routine on Wednesday nights. Before their seminar, they met for dinner in the dining halls and stopped by Campus Grounds to get the coffee fix that would see them through the three-hour session. Paige no longer sat behind and to the side of Emily so that she could steal glances; now, the three sat together. Paige still stole glances, though, still not quite believing that they were together, that she could kiss Emily pretty much whenever she wanted to, and that Emily was there for her if she ever needed to talk, or whine, or cuddle. Often, Emily would catch her stealing a glance and respond with a warm smile and a squeeze of Paige's thigh. Hanna was still Hanna, and she still got bored and shared her not-safe-for-work art pieces with Emily about halfway through class. Paige couldn't begrudge her that. She would have felt guilty if her relationship with Emily had come between Emily's friendship with Hanna. Paige couldn't feel too bad for Hanna, though, given that Hanna had gained a new best friend from the experience. She and Pru had hit it off like gangbusters. They joked that fate brought Paige and Emily together just to give the two of them a way to meet and become best friends.
After class, Emily would drive Hanna back to their apartment and then drop Paige back at her dorm. On one of these trips, Paige announced, "So, I was thinking: Tomorrow night, I want to come over and make you dinner."
"That sounds nice! Or we can go out."
"Well, I was kind of hoping we could have some time for just the two of us."
"Don't mind me," Hanna interrupted. "I'll make myself scarce..."
"Sorry, Hanna," Paige smiled, scrunching up her nose and pleading with the girl in the backseat, "If you wouldn't mind, though..."
"No, I don't mind. Who am I to come between young love?"
"Thanks, Hanna! We'll save you a plate."
"Yeah, you'd better!"
"So, anything special you need me to pick up for this meal?"
"No, don't worry about it. I'll take care of everything. Pru and I usually go shopping on Thursdays anyway. I'll just ask her to drop me off here once we're finished."
"Perfect," Hanna chimed in. "Pru can take me out to dinner! Just leave a sock on the door if you two decide that you're going to have more than just dinner! I mean, I really don't want to get in between young love!"
"Hanna!" Emily chided. Paige had already learned to take Hanna's comments in stride.
When it was just the two of them parked outside Paige's dorm, Paige confirmed that she would come over with groceries at around 5:30. "Are you sure you're up for cooking tomorrow, Paige? We can just order in."
"I'm sure. I just really want to cook for you."
"What's the occasion?"
"No occasion. I've wanted to cook for you for a while. I can't really do it at my dorm, because it only has the common kitchen on the first floor."
"Okay. I'll see you at 5:30 then. I can't wait!"
Paige would never tell Emily that there actually was an occasion that she wanted to celebrate. Thursday marked one month since their first date, the night of their first kiss. Paige wasn't bothered by the fact that Emily didn't remember that it had been a month. It wasn't as though it were a major anniversary, and Paige didn't want to look pathetic by making a big deal out of it. Still, one month meant something to her, and she was glad that she and Emily would get an evening alone, even if she were going to be the only one who was celebrating.
Thursday night, Pru helped Paige carry the groceries up to Emily and Hanna's kitchen. She gave Paige a quick hug good-by and went to collect her sidekick. "What are you in the mood for?" Pru asked. "Alcohol!" Hanna replied. Arm in arm, they headed for Pru's car.
Soon, Paige was humming around the kitchen, putting her meal together. Emily kept trying to help, but Paige kept shooing her away. Finally, to get Emily out of her hair, Paige handed her some plates and silverware and told her to set the table. "And make it nice - use a tablecloth!"
"This is nice, isn't it?" Emily confirmed as they settled in to their meal. "Thanks, for cooking, Paige."
"It was really my pleasure. I love to cook."
Emily leaned over and kissed Paige's cheek. "Remember when we first met?"
"How could I forget? I'm surprised that you would even talk to me after that."
"You were so adorable."
"I was pathetic!"
"No, you weren't." Emily grabbed Paige's hand and kissed her palm. "Did I ever tell you that Hanna and I were talking about you when we walked in to the coffee shop? When she saw you, she said that it was a sign."
"Well, maybe it was!"
"Yeah, maybe..." Emily brought Paige's hand in for another kiss.
"I used to wish that I were Hanna, just so I could talk to you. But, then, I thought, it would be so frustrating to be so close and be just a friend."
"Wow. It's amazing how much things changed between us in such a short amount of time."
"I know! It's barely been a month!" Paige didn't want to give away the fact that she had kept track of the actual date. Emily retracted her hand from Paige's and went to cup Paige's cheek, but, as she did, she knocked over her wine glass. The glass was almost empty, but Emily still ended up with a small stain on her shirt.
"Crap!" she yelled as she got up and ran into the kitchen, dabbing the spot with some cold water. Paige followed closely behind her.
"Emily, I'm so sorry!"
Emily laughed. "How is this your fault? For being so beautiful that you distracted me?" Paige rolled her eyes, and Emily continued, "Don't worry. I'm sure it'll come out. Do me a favor, though: Hanna keeps a stain-remover pen in the top drawer of her dresser. Could you run to her room and grab it for me?" Paige dashed off. Emily turned off the water in the sink and started the countdown. 3, 2, 1...
Paige turned on the light in Hanna's room and laughed to herself when she saw the bouquet of red roses that were in a vase on top of the dresser. Even though Hanna didn't have a boyfriend, Paige was sure that she had guys sending her flowers all the time. When she walked up to the dresser to grab the stain-remover pen, she saw that the card in front of the vase had her name on it. Opening it, she read, "Happy One-Month, Paige! Thank you for all that you've brought to my life. Love, Em"
Sure enough, right on cue, as Emily finished her countdown, she heard Paige's high-pitched squeal from the bedroom, "Oh my gosh! Emily!"
Paige ran back to the kitchen, threw her arms around her girlfriend's neck – still holding the card in her hand – and gave her a deep, heartfelt kiss. "You remembered?"
"Of course, I remembered! How could I forget the luckiest day of my life?"
"I think I'm the lucky one."
"I think we both are. I really love you, Paige," Emily admitted, quickly pulling Paige in for another kiss, not giving her the chance to respond. Paige's knees buckled and the card that she had been holding floated harmlessly to the floor. That was all the response that Emily needed, but Paige made sure that there was no doubt. "I love you, too," she breathed in between kisses, "So, so much."
As the kisses cooled down a bit, something occurred to Paige. "So, wait," she asked, "you ruined this blouse just so I'd go into Hanna's room and find the flowers?"
"I hope it's not ruined," Emily said, rubbing Paige's arms. "But, if it is, it was worth totally worth it! "This," she said, kissing her again, "is totally worth it."
"Ooh – you're so smooth, Fields!"
"Just kiss me, McCullers!"
Eventually, they moved their celebration to the couch in the living room. Over the course of a month, their make-out sessions had become more intense, though neither one of them felt ready or pressured to take it to the next level. They were simply enjoying each other and learning each other. While the progress of their emotional relationship had been a sprint, their physical relationship was shaping up to be a marathon, and they were content with that. They both were in it for the long haul.
As they lay next to each other on the couch, Emily asked, "So, do you want to watch a movie or something?"
"Actually," Paige confessed, "I'm feeling a bit tired."
"Okay. I'll run you home. Let me grab a jacket."
"Well, actually, - I was hoping that I could sleep here tonight?"
"Paige, you can sleep over whenever you want!" Emily pressed their lips together. "Let's find you some pajamas."
Emily sprang up from the couch and took Paige's hands to help her to her feet. She cupped Paige's face in her hands, smoothing her fingers over Paige's lips as she told her, "You know, I really love your smile."
Paige hadn't realized that she was smiling until that moment. She felt more safe and comfortable than she ever could ever remember having felt before. This past month had been a blessing. The evening had been perfect. Paige turned face-to-face with Emily, tilted her head, and leaned in. Right at that moment, like a scene out of a bad sitcom, they heard the exaggerated rattling of a key in the door.
"Okay! Everybody dressed? I didn't see a sock on the door, so I'm coming in!" Hanna's voice was booming.
"For the love of God, Hanna! What did you think was going to happen here tonight?" Emily asked.
"I'm just saying, Em, if you had given me those flowers and that card, I would be doing you on the kitchen table right now!"